[mattemesium]

(06-30-2013 12:28 AM)Soma Wrote:  

Girls need two things:
1. Drama 2. Validation

I have a situation at work with a colleague I've been trying to game but due to increasing office gossip, I've been ignoring / avoiding for a period of time. I've been fairly distant with a few of my coworkers somewhat due to being quite tired at work (due to extra shifts at my 2nd job i do for extra income & a house/investment property deposit; (around $20-25K after tax); that will be reducing to the manageable level very soon). I'm getting enough rest but planning sleeping more to counter longer days.

The girl in question flaked on me when other team members were joshing me loudly about another girl I'm gaming & seeing the night before i had plans agreed upon with my work colleague. I only told my workmate when we were discussing weekend plans and he must have told the others. I think they were trying to cock-block me.

Her flaking & her work friend boasting to the team about her desirability from guys asking for her number which was indirectly directed at me, was the extra push i needed to fully embracing & swallowing the red pill mentality FINALLY!.


--- Writing this out comes across as SOO BETA! ---


My response to this is that I've been increasing my approaches, getting same-day dates, banged a girl that showed interest in me for a while that I have no interest in & just wanted to bang out my frustrations & losing my oneitus i think i had for the colleague. I'm aware i'm breaking the cardinal rule of shitting where i eat but I wanted to have some fun & maybe trial out some mind games that anyone can recommend.

I know that I need work on my frame control in the workplace, I refuse to be a beta orbiter & am not interested entertaining the idea of giving attention to masculine 4s & 5s that have attitudes of 7s. Australian females have major attitude problems & think way too highly of themselves, treating guys like crap expecting them to kiss their asses. From the get-go I hated the fake vibe, felt animosity from some loud, overbearing personalities & not totally welcome. Why would i want to be friends with 5s that don't show mutual respect?

I understand i may have fallen into their frame & being more insular at work (I'm naturally an outgoing person), am bored with the inane conversations had throughout the days and I'm trying to develop my "small talk" conversational skills. Don't particularly want to get to know colleagues and things such as unproductive work practices (most of the day online clothes shopping or gossiping) that wouldn't slide at other workplaces are embraced where I'm used to working in productive teams.


What advice or how moving forward "working/gaming" the workplace environment?
I'm trying to be more social at work; I'm planning to read how to win friends & influence others. Any other good books similar?
Maybe the damage has been done but i think it could be fixed by giving basic attention to the team.
What is the best way to control the frame? My inner game is great somedays, shitty the next... If i'm tired, i just wanna focus on getting my work done at work & go to the gym.

I'm looking to learn some mind games/techniques that I can try-out on my colleague/s to continue developing my game skills, increase jealousy and use it as a research experiment. I believe that this wont interfere with my other game development pursuits & will continue my interest in human interaction, understanding female psychology.
It appears that my colleague is still somewhat interested by basic reading of her body language, foot positioning, hands & eye contact.

[Too_Gallus]

Ive always gamed in my working environment, at a young age its almost all its good for in my experience. In my first retail job at 18 I went through about 18 of the 30 female employees.

You need to make sure people dont think its serious in my opinion. I would never date a girl from work but I would go for the " come and hang out" bang or the drunk night out bang. There is a huge difference in social perception between the guy who dates and leads on a lot of girls and one who sleeps with a lot of girls ( hint, one is cool).

By not dating the girls you are not hurting them, so taking the 1 night bang and playing it off as "just one of those things that happen" is essential. But you need to have the social demeanour the pull this off aswell. at work ive always found it best to be as happy, light, social and agreeable as possible. even if you hate ever last person in there, just pretend you dont. no one wants to be friends with the grumpy guy. In a work place situation you need everyone to like you because if you ask this girl to come and hang out the first thing she is going to do is ask her friends in work if she should, and you need them to like you and say yes.

so basically my advice is running working place game is totally cool but you have to keep it light and fresh. Dont "lead them along" as it will turn into a shit storm for you when its over. as long as its clear that its just some fun then youre in the clear.

[PompeyChris]

It is all about frame in the workplace. The fact that the girl's friend is acting as one of her soliders (girls like to gather an army when they encounter a problem, compared to men heading into their man cave or coming on here for advice), is a solid "You're doing it right! "

She is the one thinking about it. Of course she will show that she doesn't care, much like you should. But this is her leaking.

For her you should do your thing, ignore her for a while. Then maybe re-ignite over a coffee at break or something. Nothing serious, just a little chat where you can guage her reaction. If she was in to you and you keep your frame, she will 'leak' again with signs that she is attracted to you. Then go from there.

BUT should anything happen, don't bring it into the workplace. What I mean by that is, keep professional - and only give her a kiss on the cheek - if you must. You can keep up the chemistry with touching but don't over-do this either.

In regards to working the scene - just be cool. I sometimes think it is better to be selectively social so people don't take your company for granted (and sometimes I just like to chill out on my own).

Also flirt with the other females, just make them giggle. It works wonders on how people treat you in a closed environment.

I've previously gamed a girl at work and had multiple hook-ups and a few moments where she was annoyed at me (god knows why ). I kept my frame and of course she came back.

Let me know.

Chris

[mattemesium]

(10-14-2013 07:00 AM)Too_Gallus Wrote:  

Ive always gamed in my working environment, at a young age its almost all its good for in my experience. In my first retail job at 18 I went through about 18 of the 30 female employees.

You need to make sure people dont think its serious in my opinion. I would never date a girl from work but I would go for the " come and hang out" bang or the drunk night out bang. There is a huge difference in social perception between the guy who dates and leads on a lot of girls and one who sleeps with a lot of girls ( hint, one is cool).

By not dating the girls you are not hurting them, so taking the 1 night bang and playing it off as "just one of those things that happen" is essential. But you need to have the social demeanour the pull this off aswell. at work ive always found it best to be as happy, light, social and agreeable as possible. even if you hate ever last person in there, just pretend you dont. no one wants to be friends with the grumpy guy. In a work place situation you need everyone to like you because if you ask this girl to come and hang out the first thing she is going to do is ask her friends in work if she should, and you need them to like you and say yes.

so basically my advice is running working place game is totally cool but you have to keep it light and fresh. Dont "lead them along" as it will turn into a shit storm for you when its over. as long as its clear that its just some fun then youre in the clear.

Yes I'm going to take on a more happy approach & be more agreeable (this will take much more work as I usually give my opinion on things that they take as arguments or personal attacks). I completely agree about the grumpy employee thing & I think that I've been acting the part too much which I will make a considerate attempt at rectifying.

[mattemesium]

(10-15-2013 02:28 AM)PompeyChris Wrote:  

It is all about frame in the workplace. The fact that the girl's friend is acting as one of her soliders (girls like to gather an army when they encounter a problem, compared to men heading into their man cave or coming on here for advice), is a solid "You're doing it right! "

She is the one thinking about it. Of course she will show that she doesn't care, much like you should. But this is her leaking.

For her you should do your thing, ignore her for a while. Then maybe re-ignite over a coffee at break or something. Nothing serious, just a little chat where you can guage her reaction. If she was in to you and you keep your frame, she will 'leak' again with signs that she is attracted to you. Then go from there.

BUT should anything happen, don't bring it into the workplace. What I mean by that is, keep professional - and only give her a kiss on the cheek - if you must. You can keep up the chemistry with touching but don't over-do this either.

In regards to working the scene - just be cool. I sometimes think it is better to be selectively social so people don't take your company for granted (and sometimes I just like to chill out on my own).

Also flirt with the other females, just make them giggle. It works wonders on how people treat you in a closed environment.

I've previously gamed a girl at work and had multiple hook-ups and a few moments where she was annoyed at me (god knows why ). I kept my frame and of course she came back.

Let me know.

Chris

Thanks for the reply Chris.

Ahaha… I need to learn more about female psychology at work and in general. I have some general understanding of IOI's & reading body language but always looking to learn more.

Do you mean "leaking" in a sense that its her true "feelings/emotions" that she is trying to hide through acting as indifferent / that she has other suitors?

I've been doing the ignore thing at work for a while & re-ignited only recently and her friend again made a quip about "how was lunch?" (we were eating alone together) that she replied quite good.

From reading/gauging her body language, her legs gave the indication that she was interested & anxious by the leg twine, shoe hanging/dangling off her foot non verbals she was giving. What other signs should I be looking out for?

I need to practice & develop my kino skills but apply low-level amounts so there isn't grounds for a harassment claim and am looking for any advice on some mind games I can play.

I think that I give off the vibe that I really don't care if the others try to ignore me & that I am quite happy being on my own & not fazed by the idea of it. I'll start to flirt with the other girls at work also. They'll probably think somethings up...

There's one particular team member that takes everything I do or say or remark as a personal attack on her & tries to blow-up any small mistake or issue into some huge thing… Not sure if she's butt-hurt from getting no love or just someone with low self-esteem that tries to take others to her level. (Not even a 4-rated dude would want to smash). No beer goggles that fuzzy…

[PompeyChris]

(10-15-2013 04:36 AM)mattemesium Wrote:  

Thanks for the reply Chris.

Ahaha… I need to learn more about female psychology at work and in general. I have some general understanding of IOI's & reading body language but always looking to learn more.

Do you mean "leaking" in a sense that its her true "feelings/emotions" that she is trying to hide through acting as indifferent / that she has other suitors?

I've been doing the ignore thing at work for a while & re-ignited only recently and her friend again made a quip about "how was lunch?" (we were eating alone together) that she replied quite good.

From reading/gauging her body language, her legs gave the indication that she was interested & anxious by the leg twine, shoe hanging/dangling off her foot non verbals she was giving. What other signs should I be looking out for?

I need to practice & develop my kino skills but apply low-level amounts so there isn't grounds for a harassment claim and am looking for any advice on some mind games I can play.

I think that I give off the vibe that I really don't care if the others try to ignore me & that I am quite happy being on my own & not fazed by the idea of it. I'll start to flirt with the other girls at work also. They'll probably think somethings up...

There's one particular team member that takes everything I do or say or remark as a personal attack on her & tries to blow-up any small mistake or issue into some huge thing… Not sure if she's butt-hurt from getting no love or just someone with low self-esteem that tries to take others to her level. (Not even a 4-rated dude would want to smash). No beer goggles that fuzzy…

Roissy is great for female psychology, if you haven't read his blog already.

By leaking I meant that she was moaning to her friend and it has come back to you. Maybe she's aware of this (I tend to think that females want you to know they're over thinking it at a deep level, even if 'rationally' they don't).

I am glad you guys got on lunch together and you definately played it right.

To me it sounds like you have all the IOI's you need. The very fact that she went on lunch with you after being 'put off' or whatever, would be enough for me to persue. If she seems anxious, it's a good thing. It gives her the tingles she likes, but you can also play some relationship game (if you want a relationship or even a long term FB) which will have a stronger effect now that she's on edge.

Kino can be a touch of the lower back. It doesn't have to be more but it shows intent. Especially if you forcefully pull her away from the counter (obviously smoothly done, don't launch her out the window).

A mans best mind game is to focus on himself. I have had girls tell me that "It's easy to like you, it likes, you make it our game to try and get you to like us". What am I doing to achieve this? Nothing.

I am focussing on improving myself, giving them time as and when I want to. If they fuck about, I don't stand for it. I remain strong, independant and just so damn sexy.

I'm sure the likes of el mech would have some funny mind games to play, but the above is no doubt the best IMO.

Take it slow with flirting, people might think somethings up at first but this thought will vanish when you show them you are an attractive, high value man.

And finally... that girl sounds like a total tool. You can either withstand her, play mind games or call her out. Work out what the consequences will be and choose the best one. In the past I have dealt with a girl like that with sarcasm and game. Game is the saviour of men.

Hope that helps mate.

Chris

[amity]

"Also flirt with the other females, just make them giggle. It works wonders on how people treat you in a closed environment."

This.
Where I work, there's a few funny guys, they will joke about anything, they're lewd and rude and the the vast majority of the chicks love it
The humour isn't even that funny, in many cases, it's puerile unsophisticated stuff and not very clever (from a male perspective), but the women just lap that sh1t up, everyone of those guys gets plenty of female interest, even the ugly motherfuckers, they could bone way above their level, all because they know how to be social with women and make them laugh
I think a good tip for this is watching some comedians that women like, like Michael McIntyre for instance, he has his moments for sure, but on the whole, I wouldn't be crazy about him, but almost every woman I know adores him and thinks he's the funniest bastard on the face of the planet
So it's worth watching some of his sketches and some from other comedians who women tend to like, study them, learn what you can and put it into action