[mikado]

Hello.

I have been practising solo game for some months now, and know that it is easier in clubs to do it.
However there is one problem.

Most of the times I'll be dancing, having fun on my own, not bad dance moves. The usual scenario is:
-I spot some girls coming next to me (2 by 2 most of the time), the one facing me checking me out and talking to her friend, while the latter twice or thrice turns her head for a quick glance and look at me.
-Then some seconds afterwards, I go approach, smile, offer them to dance, then they turn me down

This pissed me off so many times that now I will sometimes just throw her hand back at her and turn around. Ironically, often, I'll find that very girl checking me out again in the night many times. Hell, I have often been stalked on the dancefloor by a girl and her friends, who rejected me, but would ALWAYS come next to where I was dancing.

Yesterday, it happened again. The girl rejected me, I turned around, and she would always end up coming next to me ( having me turn my head to my side, clearly unpleased). At a moment, I was sitting in a sofa, her girlfriend and her came by my side (turning again my head ) I quickly checked them out and saw the one I was interested in show disappointment,and they came back the opposite direction, onto the dancefloor.

I don't know what is the problem. As I said in a previous thread in this subforum, maybe it's my physical feature (skinny, non ripped, almost hairyless) . I doubt so, because otherwise they would not be coming near my spot (especially seeing that sometimes I am so much pissed of that bullshit that I try to find a wide area without anyone next to me, and dance alone)
The culture (France) ? Maybe... One night stands are less common here than in the US, and beta orbiters for sure never let their girl friends alone ever.Except when these ones are having a girl-girl dance. What a bunch of pussies.

Guys simply do not approach here (except drunk ones, or other black guys like me -_- ) , they can't dance for shit, their beta orbiting is over 9000, yet the girls put bitch shields at those who have the courage to do it, complain that they are single, and afterwards go on online dating (I think the statistics were 1/3 french met their partners online).

I am a broke foreigner and don't have enough money to study abroad yet (I hope I'll do it next year), and I won't accept another year of dry spell here.
Do you have some explanation?Some tips for this very situation? Or should I try social circle game, get some results first from my current training ( trying to build muscle) and get more attractive , then see what happens? Patience is key I know, but enough is enough sometimes

By the way; I don't want to become a "French Troll" like IRT, by refering to my muscle mass, or the social settings here... So if it is definitely out of place, let me know.

[ryanf]

Instead of asking them to dance, next time, just lead. Put your hand out, let her take it, then lead her into dancing. You will set the frame by doing this. Then, run your game.

[mikado]

(08-18-2013 06:32 PM)ryanf Wrote:  

Instead of asking them to dance, next time, just lead. Put your hand out, let her take it, then lead her into dancing. You will set the frame by doing this. Then, run your game.

Actually this is what I do. I go next to them, give a tap on the shoulder/elbow (it depends), smile, and pull my hand out. This works maybe 20% of the time. Actually the city is really multicultural ( 1/3 of people are students too), and often the black guys are viewed as too agressive(well, most of them are ) and not really all girls are open to be seen with a black guy ( I think this is the same as in America).

This is why I am astonished, because there are nights where I am the only "nigger", no one approaches, yet the social settings remain and I am rejected. Though I look good, and have quite a non threatening face.

I think the ultimate answer would be coming in with some girls, and building social proof right into the floor...

[capote]

Which city in France are you in? Lyon? Marseille?

What kind of clubs are you going to? If they are student-y and you are not socially awkward it is ok to go alone. If not, gather a group of friends...2-3 and head out.

What kind of girls are you targeting in the club? If they are standing with a drink in one hand and you tap them on the shoulder for a dance, its not going to work out anyway. You need to be looking for pairs of girls who are dancing together but looking all over the place. Or a girl smoking outside the club.

Dancing by yourself and having fun is fine but keep an eye out for the girls - are they dancing too? or just standing there watching you? Don't smile when you ask them to dance...be neutral. Smiling tends to be supplicating to girls when you want something from them (dance/kiss/etc.)

Rolling in with a mixed group of guys and girls helps a lot, especially in tier-2 cities.

France is extremely racially-tolerant. Don't use the race card like you mentioned.

[mikado]

I am in Grenoble actually (in the SouthEast)

These clubs are full of students yes ( 1/3 of Grenoble people are students, 40000 roughly ).

I am talking about pairs of girls who don't have any drinks, and are checking out men on the floor. And almost all clubs have smoker rooms inside.
I did not get a sufficient social circle last year, have been working on it this time.
And for the race, actually Is it true that many people in France have arabian and black origins. However the typical crowd at the clubs in Grenoble are young white guys a bit rich and "bourgeois", who would never date a black guy if given the choice, and only hang out with their friends of a similar social level. But I don't really care, I am always horny and I'll approach anyway.
You nailed it I think: "Rolling in with a mixed group of guys and girls helps a lot, especially in tier-2 cities."

[Onto]

Capote is right, France is very open to black people. It's why Miles Davis, Cannonball Adderely and all the greats loved playing in Paris. So much so that some of the most famous Jazz standards like "Autumn Leaves" are French songs.

They were treated like Gods in France, could date white French women in public, etc.

Maybe learn to play the trumpet and do street artist game.

[capote]

I think Grenoble is predominantly white...something that works to your advantage if you play it right. Try to target the hip-hop and salsa clubs instead of the student/younger clubs.

I absolutely loathe the French bourgeoisie (particularly from Paris) who think they are God's gift to humanity. Ignore the fuck out of them. Are you a student or stagiare (intern)? If yes, focus on forming a social circle in parallel. Organise house parties...invite the neighbors, build your circle. Its not as hard as it sounds if you are a student and have access (live in the city-center with roommates etc..). French chicks love a guy who stands out from the rest, is well travelled, has lots of stories to tell and can bring a new perspective to their daily life. Be that guy.

[ero]

Just approach a girl below average and you know she will be receptive, if she doesn't bite, it is probably has to do with you.