[Menace]

So I am making approach attempts, at least to some girls in class. Yesterday I spontaneously opened an attractive Indian girl. Asking her if she was from south India. I was confident and her response was super positive. She introduced her self and gave her hand. Then I left to go out with a buddy.

So today I figured I'd ask her to some ice cream this weekend. Everything about thus second approach was bad. My state, positioning, and it was kind of needy. She was completely different and ignored me. It was amazing to see the difference.

None of this is surprising of course. But I think doing it and experiencing it is what really teaches you. You have to close when she's responding positively. Strike when the iron is hot. Because the next day she will have gone cold. Basically ABC.

The good thing is that I made myself approach more or less knowing it was not going to work AND I didn't feel any pain. It was just a lesson learned.

[OGNorCal707]

"The good thing is that I made myself approach more or less knowing it was not going to work AND I didn't feel any pain. It was just a lesson learned."

Why did you assume that "it was not going to work...", it sounds like you had a positive first interaction, you should have kept that confidence when you re-engaged her, it sounds like you went into it with a weak frame (you already assumed failure), which as you said effected your "state, positioning..." and neediness. You already know like you said that you need to strike when the iron is hot, but if you are in a small to mid-sized class with her, chances are you'll have other opportunities. Sometimes it is worth waiting a little while for a good situation, or try at least to create the logistics for opportunity (e.g. partner with her for a proj., sit next to her, etc., etc.).

Different situations call for different approaches, I had my head up my stoned-ass in college, so unfortunately I didn't run much game there (as well as having mostly dudes and a few uglies in most of my classes), but what I'm getting at is this isn't like bar, club, or street game. In that situation you can plant seeds and slowly cultivate them. I'd say re-engage this chick if she gives you an IOIs, but as always play it cool like you don't care too much.

Keep approaching, and trying, that is the only way to success, you will continue to fail, but through failure you will learn to succeed. Also, if you're not as interested with day/night game, you can try to work social circle game, by joining clubs and activities on campus, but always go for things that will have hot chicks, (yoga, spanish lang., salsa dancing, etc.)

Oh yeah, and don't ask girls out for "ice cream" in advance, it sounds super AFC/Beta to me, unless it's a spontaneous "insta-date" after class or something. Stick with drinks at a bar/lounge and if you're not 21, then hit her up to go to a party, or invite her to go to an art show, or hiking at a local park, followed by coffee/pastries, a drink at yourplace, etc....?

[Nonpareil]

(09-24-2010 08:36 PM)Menace Wrote:  

So I am making approach attempts, at least to some girls in class. Yesterday I spontaneously opened an attractive Indian girl. Asking her if she was from south India. I was confident and her response was super positive. She introduced her self and gave her hand. Then I left to go out with a buddy.

So today I figured I'd ask her to some ice cream this weekend. Everything about thus second approach was bad. My state, positioning, and it was kind of needy. She was completely different and ignored me. It was amazing to see the difference.

None of this is surprising of course. But I think doing it and experiencing it is what really teaches you. You have to close when she's responding positively. Strike when the iron is hot. Because the next day she will have gone cold. Basically ABC.

The good thing is that I made myself approach more or less knowing it was not going to work AND I didn't feel any pain. It was just a lesson learned.

Basically boiling down the essence, you need to strike while the iron is hot. Girls are capricious, indecisive and have no idea what they want except for what they want right now. It's why instead of the conversation or number exchange I try to get some sort of instadate going on, be it a drink or just a stroll down the street, whatever works.

Never assume that it won't work, it's bad on so many levels. First, who the hell is she? Second, you never really know. It's really amazing, lots of guys have approach anxiety, but yet so many girls are just dying for somebody to talk to and charm them.

[Caramel Communist]

(09-24-2010 08:36 PM)Menace Wrote:  

So I am making approach attempts, at least to some girls in class. Yesterday I spontaneously opened an attractive Indian girl. Asking her if she was from south India. I was confident and her response was super positive. She introduced her self and gave her hand. Then I left to go out with a buddy.

So today I figured I'd ask her to some ice cream this weekend. Everything about thus second approach was bad. My state, positioning, and it was kind of needy. She was completely different and ignored me. It was amazing to see the difference.

None of this is surprising of course. But I think doing it and experiencing it is what really teaches you. You have to close when she's responding positively. Strike when the iron is hot. Because the next day she will have gone cold. Basically ABC.

The good thing is that I made myself approach more or less knowing it was not going to work AND I didn't feel any pain. It was just a lesson learned.

on 2 the next one....

[eidoos77]

(09-24-2010 08:36 PM)Menace Wrote:  

So I am making approach attempts, at least to some girls in class. Yesterday I spontaneously opened an attractive Indian girl. Asking her if she was from south India. I was confident and her response was super positive. She introduced her self and gave her hand. Then I left to go out with a buddy.

So today I figured I'd ask her to some ice cream this weekend. Everything about thus second approach was bad. My state, positioning, and it was kind of needy. She was completely different and ignored me. It was amazing to see the difference.

None of this is surprising of course. But I think doing it and experiencing it is what really teaches you. You have to close when she's responding positively. Strike when the iron is hot. Because the next day she will have gone cold. Basically ABC.

The good thing is that I made myself approach more or less knowing it was not going to work AND I didn't feel any pain. It was just a lesson learned.

On getting rejected was how you read it. First you talked about her and her country which was a personal aproach, which was the right way to go. but when you asked her out for ice cream it was in her mind selfish as in it was really for your needs rather than hers. Ohh well, study a map of India be creative. Eidoos77.