[shouldercheck]

Cute blond I talked to before was eyeing me at a bar, has her friend approach our table. Long story short blond invites me back to her dorm, we make out, she wont take off anything, tells me she thinks I'm a player etc, wanted me to spend the night

Txts
HB: U home safe?
ME:No, the FBI are torturing me as we speak
HB: Oo shut up lol.well hopefully u r home safe and soubd!i gptta gp to bed.goodnight

Two days later before I'm set to go home I txt her...

Txts
ME: Blondie, you out causin trouble tonight
HB: Yea sir,u?
ME: Yah out at [bar]
HB: Aww alright.maybe i will c ya
ME: Maybe you will...what bar you at
HB: Uhhh not sure yet.pregaming right now.will text u when i know
HB: Where r ya?
ME: [bar]
ME: Where are you at chica

She didn't respond, end up running into her at another bar (we were at opposite ends). I ignore her and chat up other chicks. Finally leave and walk right past her area. She txts me...

Txts
HB: U didnt wanna say hi?!
ME: U didnt wanna say hi?!
HB: Ur the one ho didnt come over,but thats ok i c how it is
ME: As of tommorow I'm out of the country for a week, txt me on the 30th of August
HB: Why where r u going?
ME: Sweden
HB: Aww i love it there!have fun and u text meh when u get back!

A week passes, she txts me the day after I get back...

Txts
HB: Hey how was vaca?
ME: The best, you gonna be out tmmrw rugby girl
HB: Idk maybe,why are you going out?where did u go on vaca?
ME: First thurs of year hell yeah...I was in Stockholm mostly
HB: Stockhom sweden?i went there,it was awesome!well maybe i will have to go out for a drink?what r ur plans?
ME: Probably starting at [bar]...then who knows
HB: Nice.alright well text me if u wanna meet up

Next night I'm out and about...

Txts
HB:Where r ya?
ME: Got a table at [bar] come join us
HB: O yea wo r u with?anyone i know?
ME: The most distinguished gentlemen
HB: Ok im on my way

Anyways she comes over with her friend and we eventually go dance, kiss a bit on the dance floor etc etc...head back to her place, she says I'm dangerous but also says I'm hot, get her down to her bra and panties she wont go any further. Says things like I have commitment issues and am leaving cause I didn't get what I wanted. I head out eventually, didn't act pissed off by anything she said, more goodnight txts.

A day later I'm out again, txt her at the bars, as we are txting she comes into the bar I'm in and txts me that she sees me. Doesn't come over, I eventually go over to her and then back to my table (she was with a bunch of her social circle) I leave for another bar where she eventually comes over to randomly and we go back to her place, makeout...still stymied at the bra. I slept over because I thought maybe I was overgaming and wanted to up her comfort level a bit, she txts me in the morning..

Txts
HB: Hey phantom way to escape wthout saying goodbye!
ME: All the snoring terrified me
HB: Whos snoring?id snore!

I figured she wasnt comfortable with me yet so I invited her on an outing two days later...

Txts
ME: Yo toots how are your racquetball skills
HB: Haha never played in my life lol why?
ME: Going to play some tonight at 7 you're welcome to come along
HB: Who r u playing with?i will come if u teach me!
ME: Aight Ill stop by at 7
HB: Ok cool,see ya then

Went well, she got into it and later she txted me..

Txts
HB: Thanks again for trying to teach me,i dont think im very good lol maybe we can get lunch tomorrow?i will swipe ya in
ME: Free food, I'm down
etc etc etc
...

So we get lunch, I kino her a bit, she maintains heavy eyecontact, laughing alot...shes touching me a lot...calling it a love tap

Later she starts txting me more than ever...

Txts
HB: Its so hot out!ugh
HB: How was ur lab?
ME: Let out early, fuck yeah
HB: Lucky you,i got out of my lab all together!jealous?!lol
ME: Irate
HB: Haha whatcha doing now?homework?
ME: Workin the corner
HB: Nice,sounds like a blast

Next day, more txting...

Txts
HB: Hey stud,how was ur day?
ME: Awesome. You gonna let your hair down and come out for a drink tmmrw blondie
HB: Haha idk,u gonna let ur hair down and go out?lol
ME: Go out, yeah...hair, no
HB: Haha where ya goin?
ME: Wherever I please

She seemed to take this the wrong way...never txted me back, I ran into the next night at a bar, she was acting distant, came over to our table for a bit, I left but told her I was going to the other bar and she should come over and dance...she said I'll txt you (Bullshit)

I later ran into her friend that night (huge whore, also a huge kunt)
Friend: HB is over there...
ME: I'm not here for HB...
Friend: You just lost your chance!
ME: [Grabs friends arm and says wait (ugh, beta) I dunno if HB actually saw this take place]


Next day I txt HB...

Txts
ME: I'm tying you up and carrying you to the dancefloor next time scaredy cat
HB: [friend] told ya where i was and u said u didnt care,so i think ur the scardy cat
ME: Nah..I think we both have a great time when we hangout..if u r down to chill this weekend you let me know, otherwise girl, peace
HB: Why are u being rude about it,u r the one who doesnt act like u care so idk what to tell u,i enjoy your company and like spending time with u but i dont play games.
ME: Neither do I, movie tmmrw night, my place
HB: U gonna stop being rude and acting like u could care less?
ME: If I didn't care, I wouldn't be txting you

She flakes of course...
HB: Hey im going out tonight so movie wont work tonight

Of course I run into her...My drunk friend goes over with good intentions but gets pissy with her friend, I separate HB from her friend "I'll just take your friend away for a minute" and talk...

ME: What did [my friend] say...I didn't put him up to it.
HB: blah blah Are you gonna stop saying rude things like hangout with me this weekend otherwise peace
ME: Sometimes I'm a little abrasive... [put both my hands on top of hers, pull her arms out]
ME: Hey you have something on your lip [cradle her chin in my hand and rub thumb along lower lip]
ME: Come over tomorrow and watch a movie with me
HER: MAYBE
ME: You let me know, aboutface walk out, she says goodbye, looks awestruck.


Later that evening she txts me...

Txts
HB: Hey sorry for tonight.dont wanna start drauma and all that.was just caught off guard with tom and that.if u wanna talk let me kbnow
HB: Where r u now
ME: @ wendys, heading back to [college town], lez hangout girl
HB: Wends lol im at [somewhere, may have been her dorm]
ME: come ovar to [my dorm]
HB: Im at [somewhere], maybe after
HB: Who you at wendys with?
ME: my bro [bro]
HB: Haha nice.pick me up a choc frosty
HB: Come pick me up?
ME: I'm at [my dorm] whr r u

She never responded so I went to bed. Next day she txts me...

Txts
HB: Itsso cold out at the soccergame!
ME: come over tnight and I'll warm you up

I dunno how that got fucked up but she never responded...
What are some last ditch things I can do (Ignore?) or am I overreacting...

[OGNorCal707]

I'd like to offer my opinion, but there is no way I'm reading through all of that dialogue.

[Mrs. Chocolate]

(09-13-2010 07:58 PM)OGNorCal707 Wrote:  

I'd like to offer my opinion, but there is no way I'm reading through all of that dialogue.

Women like detailed stories, but this is a men site, and even me got bored.

[shouldercheck]

(09-13-2010 08:06 PM)Mrs. Chocolate Wrote:  

(09-13-2010 07:58 PM)OGNorCal707 Wrote:  

I'd like to offer my opinion, but there is no way I'm reading through all of that dialogue.

Women like detailed stories, but this is a men site, and even me got bored.

Just the last part then

[deadgabacho]

(09-13-2010 08:06 PM)Mrs. Chocolate Wrote:  

(09-13-2010 07:58 PM)OGNorCal707 Wrote:  

I'd like to offer my opinion, but there is no way I'm reading through all of that dialogue.

Women like detailed stories, but this is a men site, and even me got bored.

Save the conversation and flirting for in person. My texts are never more than logistics, even with my friends. A lot of girls just want to feel wanted, that's my impression. I'd give up. I read like half, horrible experience.

[shouldercheck]

(09-13-2010 08:09 PM)deadgabacho Wrote:  

(09-13-2010 08:06 PM)Mrs. Chocolate Wrote:  

(09-13-2010 07:58 PM)OGNorCal707 Wrote:  

I'd like to offer my opinion, but there is no way I'm reading through all of that dialogue.

Women like detailed stories, but this is a men site, and even me got bored.

Save the conversation and flirting for in person. My texts are never more than logistics, even with my friends. A lot of girls just want to feel wanted, that's my impression. I'd give up. I read like half, horrible experience.

Everyone I know says she was clearly interested (at least at some point), are you saying that is not the case

[Nonpareil]

(09-13-2010 08:12 PM)shouldercheck Wrote:  

(09-13-2010 08:09 PM)deadgabacho Wrote:  

(09-13-2010 08:06 PM)Mrs. Chocolate Wrote:  

(09-13-2010 07:58 PM)OGNorCal707 Wrote:  

I'd like to offer my opinion, but there is no way I'm reading through all of that dialogue.

Women like detailed stories, but this is a men site, and even me got bored.

Save the conversation and flirting for in person. My texts are never more than logistics, even with my friends. A lot of girls just want to feel wanted, that's my impression. I'd give up. I read like half, horrible experience.

Everyone I know says she was clearly interested (at least at some point), are you saying that is not the case

I'm thinking she had the interest level, but your own interest level was not calibrated...as in you showed too much of it.

But no worries...interest level is varaible from girl to girl; some girls you're dead in the water as soon as you show even a touch of interest, others require you to show interest.

I would ignore the girl and be nonchalant when I ran into her next (assuming the logistics to run into her are there).

[shouldercheck]

(09-13-2010 08:21 PM)Nonpareil Wrote:  

(09-13-2010 08:12 PM)shouldercheck Wrote:  

(09-13-2010 08:09 PM)deadgabacho Wrote:  

(09-13-2010 08:06 PM)Mrs. Chocolate Wrote:  

(09-13-2010 07:58 PM)OGNorCal707 Wrote:  

I'd like to offer my opinion, but there is no way I'm reading through all of that dialogue.

Women like detailed stories, but this is a men site, and even me got bored.

Save the conversation and flirting for in person. My texts are never more than logistics, even with my friends. A lot of girls just want to feel wanted, that's my impression. I'd give up. I read like half, horrible experience.

Everyone I know says she was clearly interested (at least at some point), are you saying that is not the case

I'm thinking she had the interest level, but your own interest level was not calibrated...as in you showed too much of it.

But no worries...interest level is varaible from girl to girl; some girls you're dead in the water as soon as you show even a touch of interest, others require you to show interest.

I would ignore the girl and be nonchalant when I ran into her next (assuming the logistics to run into her are there).

Yeah we always run into each other at the same bar, but Im tired of ignoring her at this bar its fucking retarded cause its so small

[oldnemesis]

(09-13-2010 06:45 PM)shouldercheck Wrote:  

HB: U home safe?

I'd cut it right here. If a person respects you so little that she cannot put extra two letters to write "You" properly, why talk to her at all?

Or maybe their SMS are charged per letter?

[iknowexactly]

(09-13-2010 06:45 PM)shouldercheck Wrote:  

Cute blond I talked to before was eyeing me at a bar, has her friend approach our table. Long story short blond invites me back to her dorm, we make out, she wont take off anything, tells me she thinks I'm a player etc, wanted me to spend the night
.

I actually liked getting the full story, here are my AFC impressions.

1) She was definitely into you physically, women don't admit "you're hot" unless they are turned on - or they think you will give them status with their friends.

2) I don't know how to put this diplomatically, but maybe we have to calibrate dialect to class, she may be upper middle class or even upper class. If she says it was rude to sign off with " otherwise, peace" , well-- then it was rude.

I agee with her in that that phrase sounds like an active blowoff, and if I recall she was just hesitant, not attacking you. "Peace" used as ciao is hip-hop speak which screams "player" and also "not above lower middle class". You know we are just status machines to them, and they are sex machines to us ( exaggerating to make a point. )

Leaving when she won't put out first night might be bad, or it might be she was never going to put out. That's what I'm kind of sensing- she's still getting used to getting attention, and sex is just super overwhelming for some chicks.

Put her own natural hesitancy together with your blunt standoffishness and it didn't match, your style was better for a tough party girl.

Of course, I have no idea what's really going on, ha ha!!

[Dash Global]

u put way to much effort in this. after a chick blows me off or flakes on me im done pursuing her. she can text me if she wants from then on out. she just likes to play games. dont get caught up in that bs.

[CJ]

Eh, I'd say you're making her jump through too many hoops. The push/pull thing only works if you're willing to give a little at some point. In your case you're not giving her much reason to comply with what you want. Once you've given her mind-blowing sex, you can get away with more shit.

Telling her friend you weren't there for her was obviously a big mistake, tell the friend what they want to hear, then do what you want.

Also way too much texting, IMO. It's so easy for a simple text to be taken the wrong way, as you can see. So minimize that shit and just work on getting her to the bar/bedroom.

[Johnnyboy]

my opinion, should asked her out on a date, not wait till yall met up at the same bar while all of yall were with your friends. You were playing it cool dont get me wrong, not tryna be the next boyfriend or nothing nice, but, she was interested shoulda given her something to hold on to. The raquet ball thing went well, shoulda gone for a dinner date with drinks, back to your place for "movie" blablabang

[RandalGraves]

I agree with the advice above: you texted too much and over-gamed a bit.

Quote:

HB: Haha where ya goin?
ME: Wherever I please

That was kind of a gamble. She was already interested in meeting up with you, you displayed some disqualification, and it ended up with the girl acting distant and afraid you're a player. Sometimes less is more. Same thing when the friend came over: when girl's friends get involved on behalf of the target, play it VERY carefully. Pretend the friend is a self-appointed bitch shield. Don't set off the landmine.

[Blaze Frazier]

What should you do? Lay back and see what happens. Unless she initiates a hang out, don't do anything. If all else fails, chalk her up to the game.

What should you have done? Nothing different, because you wouldn't learn from your mistakes this time.

[TheAntiWhiteKnight138]

Just read that whole text convo.........you're applying a "one size fits all" approach w/ some of your manerisms. Like another poster said, this girl seems middle-upper to upper class and your peace, wendys, and wherever I want game is a big turnoff.

This chick obviously thinks you're good looking but is skeptical of your personality. If you played it cooler (as in less texts), cleaned up your text verbiage, and put more weight on how much the friends opinion counts you'd have fucked her by now.

I'd ignore her at this point, if you texts you w/ a CONCRETE movie night plan then great, but if not just chalk this up to you being young and still have much to learn about women.