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Have you ever gone from "just friends" to "lovers"?
#1

Have you ever gone from "just friends" to "lovers"?

Have you ever transitioned from "just friends" with a girl who you've never had sex with into a sexual relationship?

How did you do it? What was the result?
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#2

Have you ever gone from "just friends" to "lovers"?

yes.

Was friends with a cool hot girl from work. i didn't have any female friends so i made an effort to hang out 'as friends'. She took me on a date she had with another guy, we went out to a bar and just danced and talked about her exes, then one night (3rd time we hung out as friends) she got drunk, grinded me on dfloor and i took her home to bang. Reloaded a few times afterwards.

Still in touch now. Still feel like true friends but with all the benefits.
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#3

Have you ever gone from "just friends" to "lovers"?

Quote: (07-15-2013 02:57 AM)Que enspastic Wrote:  

yes.

Was friends with a cool hot girl from work. i didn't have any female friends so i made an effort to hang out 'as friends'. She took me on a date she had with another guy, we went out to a bar and just danced and talked about her exes, then one night (3rd time we hung out as friends) she got drunk, grinded me on dfloor and i took her home to bang. Reloaded a few times afterwards.

Still in touch now. Still feel like true friends but with all the benefits.

Classy broad.

What type of "just friends" are we talking about? Im "just friends" with every girl I meet until I bang her.

God'll prolly have me on some real strict shit
No sleeping all day, no getting my dick licked

The Original Emotional Alpha
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#4

Have you ever gone from "just friends" to "lovers"?

that's a real good question, and it's something i have thought about before.

this best answer, however, i found from krauser.

"Do not waste your time on No girls or Weak-Maybe girls. It’s a huge amount of effort for precious little reward. Approach the girls you fancy and if they aren’t giving you fairly positive responses within the first five minutes, just walk away. Almost every girl I ever banged made it easy for me once I got over the initial hurdle. The medium is the message. When a girl is tardy in responding, giving little value, and flaking dates then she simply doesn’t like you much. Don’t waste your time. This means that the girls you do get onto dates are hoping you will lead them to your bedroom. They are hoping you can convince their hindbrain to sleep with you. They are on your side, rooting for you to win."

somewhere else, he says something related about how you shouldn't try to bang a girl you work with, and not just for the usual reasons, but also because it just screams of the scarcity mindset.

maybe i am misinterpreting your question and projecting too many of my own flaws, but i really believe that one of the reasons that the london daygamers have gotten so good is that they have thousands of direct approaches under their belts, so they quickly screen out girls who are No girls or Maybe girls, and focus on the Yes girls, and then from there, learn how to get these Yes girls in bed.

i wasted too much time chasing no girls and maybe girls, and ended up with nothing. it wasn't exactly pedestalization -- although it sort of was -- but it was still a waste of time. trying to convince a girl to go from a friend to a lover is not easy. it's much easier to just find new girls.

that's why my new mantra is LEADS LEADS LEADS. opening all the time, as many girls as possible.

that's the way forward, i am convinced.

#yadstop
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#5

Have you ever gone from "just friends" to "lovers"?

Yes, a good friend of mine who was really hot.

How did I convert it to being lovers?

I didn't. She confessed she was in love with me.

I don't think you should generally try to convert it yourself. Use hot friends as friends, and as bait. This was good fun though.
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#6

Have you ever gone from "just friends" to "lovers"?

Interesting responses...

Back when I had female friends who I wasn't also banging, I could never really transition into a lovers situation. They would object and string me along and espouse the value of the all-important friendship.

But I'm curious if any of you have taken a situation where a girl just flat out said "no" to a sexual situation and insisted on friends and just flipped the script on her and got her in bed?

I agree that it's a horrible waste of time and generally not worth it but I'm still curious if it can be done consistently and without too much *extra* effort on your part.
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#7

Have you ever gone from "just friends" to "lovers"?

"I agree that it's a horrible waste of time and generally not worth it but I'm still curious"

you don't have oneitis, do you? just wondering.
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#8

Have you ever gone from "just friends" to "lovers"?

It's happened to me a couple of times, both with 8+s. I'm wondering if it's more common with hot girls-I think they tend to pull from the B-team whenever they're single rather than go out and take home a random from a bar.

Anyway in both cases I was hanging out with the girls for practical reasons. One was a girl I used to carpool with to a coed sports league. After about two months one day she goes, "I broke up with my boyfriend last week... you know that means we can hook up now." Game on. The other was a girl I used to crew on a sail boat with. We'd gone out to eat a few times after sailing and had some good conversations but she had a guy she was hung up on. Then I moved a few hours away. One day she calls me up out of the blue and invites me to come spend the weekend and we hooked up.

It always happens when I'm not trying very hard. It's always been with girls I like spending time with but don't actively lust over. Krauser's sentiment is right - don't waste time chasing after girls who aren't interested. But at the same time don't completely write off hot girls in your sphere. Hang out with them when it makes sense but don't do it secretly hoping that one day you guys will hook up.
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#9

Have you ever gone from "just friends" to "lovers"?

In nearly all male/female friendships there exists one party that is more (or at all) interested in the other party. In most cases, the male is more into the female, but there are some that go the other way. There are extenuating circumstances (such as one or both people being in a relationship) that can cause this to never become an issue, but this is why questions like the below have been posed:

Quote: (07-15-2013 03:24 AM)AntiTrace Wrote:  

What type of "just friends" are we talking about? Im "just friends" with every girl I meet until I bang her.

Quote: (07-15-2013 07:30 AM)Ensam Wrote:  

I'm wondering if it's more common with hot girls-I think they tend to pull from the B-team whenever they're single rather than go out and take home a random from a bar.

This situation doesn't really happen often (converting from friendship into sex) because it's not often that the female is into the male AND circumstances are right. I've got 2-3 female friends I can think of that I could convert into sex, but the circumstances would have to be right, then just add some liquor and simmer. Why don't I? Because they're more useful to me as friends than the sex, they're definitely more attracted to me than I am to them, and it would create unwanted drama in my life and in the social circles we run in.

If you're just friends with a girl and she's into you more than you're into her, conversion is possible.

If you're just friends with a girl and you're into her more than she's into you (if at all), this conversion is nigh impossible.

The only conversion I've ever made from just friends into sex was when the girl had a deep-seated attraction to me from long ago or that I just didn't recognize as existing/circumstance hid.

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#10

Have you ever gone from "just friends" to "lovers"?

Quote: (07-15-2013 06:54 AM)VincentVinturi Wrote:  

Interesting responses...

Back when I had female friends who I wasn't also banging, I could never really transition into a lovers situation. They would object and string me along and espouse the value of the all-important friendship.

But I'm curious if any of you have taken a situation where a girl just flat out said "no" to a sexual situation and insisted on friends and just flipped the script on her and got her in bed?

I agree that it's a horrible waste of time and generally not worth it but I'm still curious if it can be done consistently and without too much *extra* effort on your part.

I see the problem here.

You are not talking about a friend friend. You are talking about a girl who has already rejected you, upon which you decided just friends is okay for you, and then you want to transition to fellatio.

That's not going to work.

What would work?

Quote:AneroidOcean Wrote:

The only conversion I've ever made from just friends into sex was when the girl had a deep-seated attraction to me from long ago or that I just didn't recognize as existing/circumstance hid.

This.

She has to want you, she has to chase you, she has to see you get other girls and start to develop feelings. Jealousy is a beauty.

This is also how it happened with me. I never made a move on her. We were just friends. My advice? On to the next one, dude.
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#11

Have you ever gone from "just friends" to "lovers"?

I've done this and written about it before here and at Roissy. You have to tap into the freaky, pervy side of women they won't share with boyfriends.

Most male-female friendship have a degree of flirting or talking about sex. Women love to confess to male friends about sexual exploits for various reasons. Anyway, there's usually a side door to get in.

Sometimes it's a basic as telling a woman if she hasn't been touched in a while it's affecting her health, so why not a massage? Other times, you can confess a g-rated fantasy like wanting to shave her legs and it'll get her riled up when you do it. Other times you can push late night convos about sex into phone sex, and there's your open door. There's also offering to shoot those sexy pics she's always wanted.

Finally, there is a hail mary that has worked for some people I know, although I never tried it. You tell her you're thinking about getting engaged but want to live out one last fantasy which is spending the night with her. If she complains, you can say "I just meant cuddling!" But I know a few women who did go for this.
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