This is an article I read 6 months ago that a buddy sent to me.
I find some of it, surprisingly a large part to be quite relevant to me.
Is it for you?
Even if it isn't, it's an interesting perspective.
Basically, the article states there are 10 phases of a player:
(http://melblairblog.wordpress.com/2009/0...adies-man/)
Phase 1:
Finds out about game through either the book, the internet or a friend. Then he goes deep deep down the rabbit hole. Usually finds MASF which leads him to melbourne lair and meeting a few guys on this forum. He reads a lot of crazy ideas, rules, routines, techniques, tricks and goes out and suddenly life is AWESOME. He is SUPERHUMAN. He might not be getting any results, but when you're starving in a desert and somebody gives you a cracker, that is the best damn cracker you've ever had. The guy revels and is excited by the sudden idea, the opportunity, that he can totally kick ass at picking up chicks.
Phase 2:
He realises that it's actually a lot harder than he initially though. He starts getting small amounts of success and learns the fundamentals of body language, touch and feeling worthy. He realises the small hill he was walking towards is actually a gigantic mountain, with many caves and dangers. He develops a bit of anxiety towards game and girls and probably gets quite confused. At this point he finds a mentor or gets some coaching from one of the companies and he is absolutely inspired by what is possible. He sees senior community guys pull off ridiculous pick ups, he feels hope. He starts again fresh forgetting all the rules and techniques he learnt in the first phase. Even though he might only be able to just approach girls, this is enough for him to feel good, because he has hope, he knows that through these approaches in six months he'll have ridiculous success, in a year he'll be slamming hotties all over town.
Phase 3:
He begins to understand that instead of looking outside for the answer he should really be looking inside. He starts going to the gym, eating right, he gets a god damned decent looking haircut. He starts hanging around people who make him feel good and ditching people who hold him back. He starts to take a little pride in himself and his appearance. He'll start getting into david deida and tony robbins and such. When he makes this realisation that being good at game is about becoming a gift to yourself before you can be a gift to others he starts getting success. He feels the realisation that turning attention towards having an awesome life and away from girls actually gets you more girls. He will definitely start chasing his passion which he may have forgotten about, guitar, music, painting, martial arts etc... At this point he'll probably get his first ongoing girl and begin to feel like he's really understanding game.
Phase 4:
He starts to get restless, he feels like he's plateaued. He wants more, he wants to be better...he starts going out and if he gets just a few rejections his massive image of himself as finally being good at this gets rocked and he gets depressed. He feels like he hasn't grown at all and all the material he read in the previous three phases work against him and he feels like shit. He doubts himself and everything he's done and thinks maybe everything he learnt was wrong and gets over game, over the community and over self-growth. At this point he either disappears back into the social zombie matrix or looks to his amazing friends in the community or wisdom in books or from teachers to pull him out.
Phase 5:
Through stepping out of his reality and looking at himself he feels proud of himself for how far he's come and has compassion for his battered self-esteem. He realises that the world is chaos and to judge himself externally on results and in comparison to others he is destined to fail. He starts to understand the idea of "the heroes journey". In which he begins to revel in every challenge that faces him and sees that the adventure which is life is actually pretty fun overall if you take the right mindset. He begins reborn for the third time as a guy who's just a normal guy who likes girls. He accepts his sexual nature, he accepts who he is and he goes out without anything he's learnt in the last five phases. He's just him, but he's himself with the experience of the last five phases directing him unconsciously towards his goals. He has given himself better body language, he has given himself passion, he has given himself the ability to project his sexual intent. He feels okay to project his intent because when he looks at himself in the mirror he sees an attractive dude. He understands that making yourself an attractive dude in your own eyes is far more effective than learning any techniques or tricks.
Phase 6:
Outstanding, outrageous success. Multiple girls, mutliple lays, awesome friends, awesome times. He becomes absolutely elite and hangs out with elite guys doing elite things. He gets into really masculine endeavors like hiking, rock climbing, footy, sprinting, adventuring, surfing. He goes out less but picks up more, he is truly happy with himself and his life. His passion for women has spread to passion for life, for a good career, good fun, good people, good food, good experiences. He realises the ultimate happiness is in service to others. He'll start teaching others around him to take the journey he has to be awesome. He will probably meet a girl he falls in love with and will go out with her in either an exclusive or polyamorous relationship.
Phase 7:
He realises that having a loving relationship is a completely different game all together. His older friends comment and are sometimes a bit wary of his new identity, he is in a position where he starts to knock girls back and he has the choice he always yearned for. At the same time the roof to his standards, his desires and his want for success go further up. He suddenly feels like he's plateaued again and gets frustrated that he wants to be even better than awesome.
Phase 8:
He either breaks up with his exclusive girlfriend or just starts going out again trying to meet girls. If he gets more than even a few rejections he feels anxiety again, he feels rusty, he starts questioning himself again. His massive identity in his own mind of the amazing seducer he is suddenly is under threat. The idea that maybe he's not the awesome guy he thinks he is truly terrifies him and he's more afraid of approaching girls than he was when he first started picking up girls. He still gets awesome scattered success because he is an attractive dude, but contentedness still eludes him.
Phase 9:
He seeks to regain his old skills and goes out hard. He pushes himself constantly to be as good as he used to be and then some. He'll get coaching again or link up with guys better than him to find the cure, he drives himself to the edge of insanity to reach a level that doesn't actually exist. Things start to lose meaning and his values go all over the place. He starts dropping his standards to pick up girls that aren't completely right for him. This smashes his self-esteem and he feels lost, alone and in shock because he thought he knew everything but suddenly feels like he knows nothing.
Phase 10:
Through pushing himself to the edge he begins to understand the true lesson in game, in life. He feels an overwhelming powerful inspiring infinite joy. He feels invincible, he feels incredible. He has stopped giving a fuck. He stops caring how other guys in the community see his game, he stops caring how he sees his game. He sees only himself and a world of opportunity and begins moving forward in the right direction again with the right mindset. He thanks himself and the universe for the previous 9 phases and understands the pain, the hate, the frustration and the rejection was worth it and had to happen because it has led him to freedom from judgment, from himself and others. He begins interacting on a level where he is purely himself and realises if it doesn't happen the way he wants it doesn't matter at all, all that matters is that he sticks by his values that he will have to live with for the rest of his life. He barely goes out to pick up now, he might go out to hang with friends or to have a good time, he starts meeting the right people everywhere. He makes friends with guys and girls there is no game anymore, he is above it and in a place of pure love and giving. He realises that life is supposed to be FUN and he and nobody else is in charge of that. His only goal now is how he can spend the rest of his years on the planet having fun, making friends, going on adventures, seeing the world, and having fun chasing women, whether they shoot him down, flake on him, reject him, tell him he's weird. None of it matters because he knows and has worked hard to truly feel is an attractive man who understands that in the end everything he's learnt has definitely improved his chances but the expectation that every interaction will be perfect is an absolutely pipe dream. He feels okay to completely bomb out in sets like he was in the first phase of his journey as well as losing girls he should be able to get and seeing new inexperienced guys do better. He knows that trying to work out his value by his game versus other people's game and girls liking him is a useless and completely illogical endeavor. He understands he has done his part completely by being proud of himself, taking pride in his appearance, learning how to hold himself attractively, learning how to flirt and project his sexuality. He has learnt all the skills and mindsets required to be an amazing wonderful inspiring man....and with that he realises that if other people don't realise what an awesome dude he is, it's completely not his problem because he likes who he is....and in regards to his results, how his game looks, how many "10's" he can get, how many lays does he get a month, WHO GIVES A FUCK, he is having too much god damned fun to give a shit.
I find some of it, surprisingly a large part to be quite relevant to me.
Is it for you?
Even if it isn't, it's an interesting perspective.
Basically, the article states there are 10 phases of a player:
(http://melblairblog.wordpress.com/2009/0...adies-man/)
Phase 1:
Finds out about game through either the book, the internet or a friend. Then he goes deep deep down the rabbit hole. Usually finds MASF which leads him to melbourne lair and meeting a few guys on this forum. He reads a lot of crazy ideas, rules, routines, techniques, tricks and goes out and suddenly life is AWESOME. He is SUPERHUMAN. He might not be getting any results, but when you're starving in a desert and somebody gives you a cracker, that is the best damn cracker you've ever had. The guy revels and is excited by the sudden idea, the opportunity, that he can totally kick ass at picking up chicks.
Phase 2:
He realises that it's actually a lot harder than he initially though. He starts getting small amounts of success and learns the fundamentals of body language, touch and feeling worthy. He realises the small hill he was walking towards is actually a gigantic mountain, with many caves and dangers. He develops a bit of anxiety towards game and girls and probably gets quite confused. At this point he finds a mentor or gets some coaching from one of the companies and he is absolutely inspired by what is possible. He sees senior community guys pull off ridiculous pick ups, he feels hope. He starts again fresh forgetting all the rules and techniques he learnt in the first phase. Even though he might only be able to just approach girls, this is enough for him to feel good, because he has hope, he knows that through these approaches in six months he'll have ridiculous success, in a year he'll be slamming hotties all over town.
Phase 3:
He begins to understand that instead of looking outside for the answer he should really be looking inside. He starts going to the gym, eating right, he gets a god damned decent looking haircut. He starts hanging around people who make him feel good and ditching people who hold him back. He starts to take a little pride in himself and his appearance. He'll start getting into david deida and tony robbins and such. When he makes this realisation that being good at game is about becoming a gift to yourself before you can be a gift to others he starts getting success. He feels the realisation that turning attention towards having an awesome life and away from girls actually gets you more girls. He will definitely start chasing his passion which he may have forgotten about, guitar, music, painting, martial arts etc... At this point he'll probably get his first ongoing girl and begin to feel like he's really understanding game.
Phase 4:
He starts to get restless, he feels like he's plateaued. He wants more, he wants to be better...he starts going out and if he gets just a few rejections his massive image of himself as finally being good at this gets rocked and he gets depressed. He feels like he hasn't grown at all and all the material he read in the previous three phases work against him and he feels like shit. He doubts himself and everything he's done and thinks maybe everything he learnt was wrong and gets over game, over the community and over self-growth. At this point he either disappears back into the social zombie matrix or looks to his amazing friends in the community or wisdom in books or from teachers to pull him out.
Phase 5:
Through stepping out of his reality and looking at himself he feels proud of himself for how far he's come and has compassion for his battered self-esteem. He realises that the world is chaos and to judge himself externally on results and in comparison to others he is destined to fail. He starts to understand the idea of "the heroes journey". In which he begins to revel in every challenge that faces him and sees that the adventure which is life is actually pretty fun overall if you take the right mindset. He begins reborn for the third time as a guy who's just a normal guy who likes girls. He accepts his sexual nature, he accepts who he is and he goes out without anything he's learnt in the last five phases. He's just him, but he's himself with the experience of the last five phases directing him unconsciously towards his goals. He has given himself better body language, he has given himself passion, he has given himself the ability to project his sexual intent. He feels okay to project his intent because when he looks at himself in the mirror he sees an attractive dude. He understands that making yourself an attractive dude in your own eyes is far more effective than learning any techniques or tricks.
Phase 6:
Outstanding, outrageous success. Multiple girls, mutliple lays, awesome friends, awesome times. He becomes absolutely elite and hangs out with elite guys doing elite things. He gets into really masculine endeavors like hiking, rock climbing, footy, sprinting, adventuring, surfing. He goes out less but picks up more, he is truly happy with himself and his life. His passion for women has spread to passion for life, for a good career, good fun, good people, good food, good experiences. He realises the ultimate happiness is in service to others. He'll start teaching others around him to take the journey he has to be awesome. He will probably meet a girl he falls in love with and will go out with her in either an exclusive or polyamorous relationship.
Phase 7:
He realises that having a loving relationship is a completely different game all together. His older friends comment and are sometimes a bit wary of his new identity, he is in a position where he starts to knock girls back and he has the choice he always yearned for. At the same time the roof to his standards, his desires and his want for success go further up. He suddenly feels like he's plateaued again and gets frustrated that he wants to be even better than awesome.
Phase 8:
He either breaks up with his exclusive girlfriend or just starts going out again trying to meet girls. If he gets more than even a few rejections he feels anxiety again, he feels rusty, he starts questioning himself again. His massive identity in his own mind of the amazing seducer he is suddenly is under threat. The idea that maybe he's not the awesome guy he thinks he is truly terrifies him and he's more afraid of approaching girls than he was when he first started picking up girls. He still gets awesome scattered success because he is an attractive dude, but contentedness still eludes him.
Phase 9:
He seeks to regain his old skills and goes out hard. He pushes himself constantly to be as good as he used to be and then some. He'll get coaching again or link up with guys better than him to find the cure, he drives himself to the edge of insanity to reach a level that doesn't actually exist. Things start to lose meaning and his values go all over the place. He starts dropping his standards to pick up girls that aren't completely right for him. This smashes his self-esteem and he feels lost, alone and in shock because he thought he knew everything but suddenly feels like he knows nothing.
Phase 10:
Through pushing himself to the edge he begins to understand the true lesson in game, in life. He feels an overwhelming powerful inspiring infinite joy. He feels invincible, he feels incredible. He has stopped giving a fuck. He stops caring how other guys in the community see his game, he stops caring how he sees his game. He sees only himself and a world of opportunity and begins moving forward in the right direction again with the right mindset. He thanks himself and the universe for the previous 9 phases and understands the pain, the hate, the frustration and the rejection was worth it and had to happen because it has led him to freedom from judgment, from himself and others. He begins interacting on a level where he is purely himself and realises if it doesn't happen the way he wants it doesn't matter at all, all that matters is that he sticks by his values that he will have to live with for the rest of his life. He barely goes out to pick up now, he might go out to hang with friends or to have a good time, he starts meeting the right people everywhere. He makes friends with guys and girls there is no game anymore, he is above it and in a place of pure love and giving. He realises that life is supposed to be FUN and he and nobody else is in charge of that. His only goal now is how he can spend the rest of his years on the planet having fun, making friends, going on adventures, seeing the world, and having fun chasing women, whether they shoot him down, flake on him, reject him, tell him he's weird. None of it matters because he knows and has worked hard to truly feel is an attractive man who understands that in the end everything he's learnt has definitely improved his chances but the expectation that every interaction will be perfect is an absolutely pipe dream. He feels okay to completely bomb out in sets like he was in the first phase of his journey as well as losing girls he should be able to get and seeing new inexperienced guys do better. He knows that trying to work out his value by his game versus other people's game and girls liking him is a useless and completely illogical endeavor. He understands he has done his part completely by being proud of himself, taking pride in his appearance, learning how to hold himself attractively, learning how to flirt and project his sexuality. He has learnt all the skills and mindsets required to be an amazing wonderful inspiring man....and with that he realises that if other people don't realise what an awesome dude he is, it's completely not his problem because he likes who he is....and in regards to his results, how his game looks, how many "10's" he can get, how many lays does he get a month, WHO GIVES A FUCK, he is having too much god damned fun to give a shit.
