[Pete]

Just do it. No need to hint anything.

[chamele0n]

(04-01-2013 06:16 PM)Divorco Wrote:  

(04-01-2013 03:05 PM)WestCoast Wrote:  

The longer a girl makes you wait the less attractive you are to her.
No girl is going to keep her legs together for her dream guy.

This. She wouldn't make Brad Pitt wait. But then again, Brad Pitt would putz around in cafes for four dates.

(04-01-2013 03:05 PM)WestCoast Wrote:  

The answer is in your post, you drop her on the third date.

I disagree. Don't act like an asexual gay best friend for two dates and then shock her on the third date. The original poster is afraid to display sexual intent. So he acts like a surreptitious, creepy, beta, nice guy on early dates. Then he gets frustrated and indignant when she doesn't put out.

You need to own your sexuality and be honest about your sexual intent. You don't want to be pushy or desperate, because you have options. But you want to make it quite clear that you are not interested in making a new friend or wasting time.

I reread the thread title "How do you hint?". You do compliance tests and kino games. You make strong eye contact. You sit next to her (show her your Iphone pictures). You hold your forearm out for her to grasp while walking. You rest your hand on her shoulder, then her back, then her thigh. If she doesn't cooperate then you freeze her out.

Why should a man agonize over whether a woman likes him, whether she will permit escalation on the next date. Kiss her and find out already.

I would disagree with your analysis that I "act like a surreptitious, creepy, beta, nice guy on early dates"

I said that I use another strategy. I don't go for kino in public, I do it once when we are watching a movie together once I get them back to my place. That way they assume I'm bringing them over for a makeout and are not as reluctant as if we had made out and there was no other possible escalation there other than a lay.

Mystery, who I got a lot of my early theory and strategy from, in his book once said that he does not talk about sex with a girl at public dates because a guy that gets lots of sex does not care enough to talk about. Because I don't talk of it much it does not mean that I am in some way afraid of talking about it. It's just not in my nature. I do freeze them out, however, if things don't go my way.

[Travesty]

Did not read the entire thread maybe you answered this or related to this:

You need to go with the mentality you are getting laid on date 1, Roosh I believe preaches this as well, the further you get on date 1 the less work each following date will be, hopefully ZERO. Do not even think about 3 dates or you will fulfill a self-made prophecy that you will have to reach the 3rd date before something happens.

For all my bangs, the latest I kissed was the second date in my entire life. Latest bang was 4th date and that felt way too long, made the mistake of going on a beach day time date for date 3 (at least I got to check out the goods).

The vast majority have come on date 1 or purely because of logistics or timing sex gets shoved to date 2. This includes anything from "sexually free girls" to virgins mind you.

My suggestion, cut the coffee dates, get her somewhere at a dark bar, dark dance floor, or dark booth, order a nice round of shots and go to work much more quickly, no more phone chit chats, either. This isn't her time to act like she's on the View. Attack her like a rabid bear, she should be feeling your charming aggression like a round of carpet bombing.

[Nonpareil]

Sounds like the OP ran into some serious hamster, but in the future, mix up your dates, never do the same thing twice in a row. For a first date I like to do drinks, for the second something fun or a meal at my place and the third a movie at my place. I close on at least 4 out of 5 second dates.

Unless she's very attractive, or there have been many indications that a bang is forthcoming (heavy makeout, handjob/blowjob/fingerbang, texting me pics of her box etc,.), I don't do any hinting at all; I stop calling...though I have gotten a bit of success with sort of a freeze-out method. Put her on ice for 2-4 weeks, hit her up out of the blue with a good-old restart text™ (something with some sizzle that gets you to your house, 'Hey, I've been busy, but you should come over and see my new puppy' or whatever). Sure, you run the risk of her ignoring the text or rejecting the advance, but get her over and you're guaranteed to bang.

That being said, I come in guns blazing on any third date.

[bojangles]

you need some new venues, you can't keep hitting coffee shops for dates, you need a little alcohol to mess with her forebrain/hindbrain

[WestCoast]

(04-01-2013 06:16 PM)Divorco Wrote:  

(04-01-2013 03:05 PM)WestCoast Wrote:  

The longer a girl makes you wait the less attractive you are to her.
No girl is going to keep her legs together for her dream guy.

This. She wouldn't make Brad Pitt wait. But then again, Brad Pitt would putz around in cafes for four dates.

(04-01-2013 03:05 PM)WestCoast Wrote:  

The answer is in your post, you drop her on the third date.

I disagree. Don't act like an asexual gay best friend for two dates and then shock her on the third date. The original poster is afraid to display sexual intent. So he acts like a surreptitious, creepy, beta, nice guy on early dates. Then he gets frustrated and indignant when she doesn't put out.

You need to own your sexuality and be honest about your sexual intent. You don't want to be pushy or desperate, because you have options. But you want to make it quite clear that you are not interested in making a new friend or wasting time.

I reread the thread title "How do you hint?". You do compliance tests and kino games. You make strong eye contact. You sit next to her (show her your Iphone pictures). You hold your forearm out for her to grasp while walking. You rest your hand on her shoulder, then her back, then her thigh. If she doesn't cooperate then you freeze her out.

Why should a man agonize over whether a woman likes him, whether she will permit escalation on the next date. Kiss her and find out already.

He should be trying to fuck her from hello.

How do I hint = how do I continue acting like a pussy. There are no hints when her hand is up your shirt already or yours up hers.

What i am saying is try to bang her from hello and if she doesn't put out by day three you walk out. It's not hard. You just move on because you really don't give a flying fuck.

In all seriousness this thread is newb thread. That's not an insult, this is how the game is now played in the USA as the culture continues to get shittier.

Watching movies + scared to talk about sex in public is absurd. We're in a hook up + ballsy men rule culture. You should be having girls say stuff like "thank you for making me sore" and "I want to suck your dick tonight".

If a girl calls you her "dream man" and won't have sex with you, she in fact thinks you're far from a dream man. Always go by her actions.

(Completely off topic for laughs but does anyone else find it funny that he gets his theory from "mystery" but then has an avatar of a troll with a fuzzy hat on)

[Caveman]

Time for my 2 cents, but I should first mention that my advice probably won't apply much to girls in the US, I see you're in Russia, I don't know how problematic girls are there for the first lay, but I live in such a culture (patriarchal society and not easiest to lay girls) so maybe I can give you some useful advice:

I think you're right, from your description she has put you into a marriage material category and is playing a witholding-sex-game hoping that you'll see her as not-an-easy girl and treat her as a marriage type of girl. And with many beta guys this strategy actually works. But be aware that the same girl in another setting will probably be much easier for some other guy, for example if on vacation or something similar. And I believe this includes asexual girls as well, they too will use sex as a tool to satisfy other needs, and that includes fast sex as well.

My diagnosis for your case:

I don't think it's possible to hint that you've got a 3 date limit. I mean you could tell it directly or indirectly, or let's say in an ideal scenario she would find out from someone else about it and realize that her dates with you are about to expire, like maybe she's gonna see you one last time. That still WON'T change her strategy. She will have a piece of information in her head that you don't continue dating beyond X dates unless sex happens, but I repeat: she still won't change her strategy. You may wonder then what is she thinking? Basically she refuses to believe the information and creates a much more rosy fantasy in her head and acts on the basis of her fantasy. In your case she will believe that you'll continue to date her forever even if you've told her that it won't happen.

So what do you do now?

Most likely you'll need to officially dump her so that she'll FEEL that it can't continue like that. Then you'll have a much better chance if you hook up again, whether sooner or later. Merely having the information in her head is not enough, she must FEEL you and FEEL the storm coming and only that will make her change course.

I don't know if you can save your current situation but here are some tips how you could better act:

You confront her whenever she displeases you. But before that I must emphasize your most important prerequisite is your frame, in other words your beliefs about relationships. The most important one is the belief that without sex you're unhappy, sex must happen early in the relationship, otherwise you won't waste any time on such relationships. It's good you already have this belief. As a result of this frame here's how you would respond in some situations:

Situation #1: >and later texted me saying that she got the sense that I was interested in her purely for sex

Confront her on this one, but in person, not by text or by phone. Your reply could be something like: "Do you not want us to have sex by now? If you've got some problem or sexualy deficiency you should at least let me know." Basically she's the guilty one for not being sexually attracted to you and wasting your time. Confront her with this frame in your mind and make HER try to justify herself, SHE's the guilty one. And be ready to dump her immediately if she displeases you, but in a calm and polite manner, something along the lines: "Well if we're not compatible then there's no reason to torment each other like this, we're better off as just friends ..."

Also don't ever justify why you need sex and expect it to happen soon, if she tries to guilt you about it, your stance should be that it's just the way it is and you can't feel guilty about it, for normal people that's just the way it should be. Don't try to explain it, just tell her it's the way you've always been and that's it. Again it's her fault or deficiency if she's not physically attracted and doesn't want sex by now.


Situation #2: She avoids to come to your place. Again confront her, ask her "Why do you avoid to come to my place?". Make sure when you ask this you're very close into her face, you're very serious, looking her straight in the eyes and expecting an answer. Make the situation very uncomfortable. And don't be afraid to admit you expect sex.


Situation #3: You're heavily making out on a bed, with all prerequisits for sex to happen, but she resists. I'm not talking here about Mystery's LMR, that's within the first 7 hours or so together. I'm talking if you've spent much more time with her, like 20 hours or something. Again confront her: "What is the problem?" And be very serious, she should know you're not happy and she ruined the moment. If this happens for a second night don't be afraid to get up, put your coat on and leave without saying a word. Again a serious and uncomfortable situation, but like I said she won't change course unless she FEELS your rule, merely having it as an information in her head is not enough. And don't call her or message her on facebook or anything, she did you wrong and now she should be the one calling you to fix things.


Finally I'll give you the hint you've asked for in the title (How to hint women I drop them if they don't put out by third date): After you've confronted her about why still no sex you can tell her something like "You'll have to make a decision whether you want us to continue seeing each other or not, and you'll have to make this decision very soon." Ofcourse you should've made it clear previously that the only type of "seeing each other" that can exist is with sex included.


And just to be clear: If you need to use any of my advice above then you're probably not doing very well with women. Your best strategy is (as told by other posters above) to organize your life with many women and new opportunities around you so you won't even have time to waste with such girls at all.

[RaulValdez739]

(04-01-2013 08:25 PM)il duce Wrote:  

If its past the third date ($30 drinks cap) and no lay, Its just a next. It's may be painful but man must thrive on order and laws

Order and laws lol

[Brenden]

(04-01-2013 09:31 PM)iknowexactly Wrote:  

I also am backing off on advocating the use of "frigid." It's just needlessly mean, they can't help it-- it's their wiring.

I'm thinking "low-drive" might be a little less judgmental.

But the principle is the same, a big minority of women are simply not DTF and will rarely change.

I think that there are a statistically insignificant number of actually frigid women. I'd bet money that 99% of these supposedly "low-drive" women haven't been fucked by an alpha ever (or not in a long time.)

[Power_Ranger]

"Duh, what am I listening to your retarded blabbering about and paying for your meals for?"


Oops, paying for her stuff and no sex. Mistake.

[eradicator]

(04-01-2013 06:16 PM)Divorco Wrote:  

(04-01-2013 03:05 PM)WestCoast Wrote:  

The longer a girl makes you wait the less attractive you are to her.
No girl is going to keep her legs together for her dream guy.

This. She wouldn't make Brad Pitt wait. But then again, Brad Pitt would putz around in cafes for four dates.

(04-01-2013 03:05 PM)WestCoast Wrote:  

The answer is in your post, you drop her on the third date.

I disagree. Don't act like an asexual gay best friend for two dates and then shock her on the third date. The original poster is afraid to display sexual intent. So he acts like a surreptitious, creepy, beta, nice guy on early dates. Then he gets frustrated and indignant when she doesn't put out.

You need to own your sexuality and be honest about your sexual intent. You don't want to be pushy or desperate, because you have options. But you want to make it quite clear that you are not interested in making a new friend or wasting time.

I reread the thread title "How do you hint?". You do compliance tests and kino games. You make strong eye contact. You sit next to her (show her your Iphone pictures). You hold your forearm out for her to grasp while walking. You rest your hand on her shoulder, then her back, then her thigh. If she doesn't cooperate then you freeze her out.

Why should a man agonize over whether a woman likes him, whether she will permit escalation on the next date. Kiss her and find out already.

Not sure if you are being literal or not with your brad pitt comment, one of his girlfriends made him wait over a year before having sex(I think jennifer anniston?) which to me sounds insane but whatever.

I definitely agree with the rest. You should definitely be at least trying to kiss her on the first date if you are interested. Do an activity date for your second date. Or cook dinner for her, assuming you have some halfway decent culinary skills.

[AneroidOcean]

(05-02-2013 03:14 PM)master_thespian Wrote:  

Not sure if you are being literal or not with your brad pitt comment, one of his girlfriends made him wait over a year before having sex(I think jennifer anniston?) which to me sounds insane but whatever.

I definitely agree with the rest. You should definitely be at least trying to kiss her on the first date if you are interested. Do an activity date for your second date. Or cook dinner for her, assuming you have some halfway decent culinary skills.

Can you point to any significant references for this claim that Jennifer Aniston (or anyone) made Brad Pitt wait over a year before having sex with him?

master_thespian, you are part of the problem with your completely unfounded statements, not part of the solution.

OP:
Best way to deal with this situation is to tell the girl that you don't appreciate her accusations. Tell her that you made a nice gesture and invited her to come to your place to watch a movie and have some wine. If she's not interested that's fine, but she has no reason to be rude.

If she doesn't want to do it, say "okay, best of luck" and leave it at that. Keep in mind that YOU set the expectation she has that she'd be able to continue dating you and take things really slow. YOU took her to 4 coffee dates. If you don't like your results, change YOUR actions, don't try to change her or give her an ultimatum when the problem started with your own actions, not her inaction.

BRING THE MOVIES.

[eradicator]

(05-02-2013 09:22 PM)AneroidOcean Wrote:  

(05-02-2013 03:14 PM)master_thespian Wrote:  

Not sure if you are being literal or not with your brad pitt comment, one of his girlfriends made him wait over a year before having sex(I think jennifer anniston?) which to me sounds insane but whatever.

I definitely agree with the rest. You should definitely be at least trying to kiss her on the first date if you are interested. Do an activity date for your second date. Or cook dinner for her, assuming you have some halfway decent culinary skills.

Can you point to any significant references for this claim that Jennifer Aniston (or anyone) made Brad Pitt wait over a year before having sex with him?

People magazine interview in June 25, 2001 - and she made him wait 9 months, or so she said in the interview.

Quote:

master_thespian, you are part of the problem with your completely unfounded statements, not part of the solution.

this was pretty surprising news at the time- it was from an interview with people magazine, it is possible jennifer was lying in the interview but this was before their marriage and divorce.

At the time brad pitt was constantly being voted the sexiest man alive and could have/should have been banging whoever he wanted and I remembered thinking he was a complete idiot for not escalating- or maybe he was just really busy on movie shoots and travelling and they only had a few dates in those 9 months so that time could be misleading.

[iknowexactly]

(04-02-2013 01:46 PM)Brenden Wrote:  

(04-01-2013 09:31 PM)iknowexactly Wrote:  

I also am backing off on advocating the use of "frigid." It's just needlessly mean, they can't help it-- it's their wiring.

I'm thinking "low-drive" might be a little less judgmental.

But the principle is the same, a big minority of women are simply not DTF and will rarely change.

I think that there are a statistically insignificant number of actually frigid women. I'd bet money that 99% of these supposedly "low-drive" women haven't been fucked by an alpha ever (or not in a long time.)

I disagree- if they had any kind of drive they'd be masturbating, and if they weren't hideous they'd have found someone to fuck them.

To have 30-40% say they aren't interested, and argue that the "real" number is still <2% ( Statistically insignificant) I think you'd have to have some compelling evidence besides your intuition that all they need is an "alpha fuck."

[InternationPlayboy]

I think the best options here are:

1) Learn to bang by third date

2) If she's worth it, hold out if you can't bang by third date

3) If you are really that set on not being able to bang by third date, don't hint shit, just drop her. You think hinting that you won't hang out with her unless she's easy is going to get you anywhere?

[Manystyles]

(04-01-2013 03:05 PM)WestCoast Wrote:  

The answer is in your post, you drop her on the third date.

The longer a girl makes you wait the less attractive you are to her.

No girl is going to keep her legs together for her dream guy.

Not sure about this. Every chick is different. I've been on 5 dates with this girl im seeing. Here is the breakdown:

1st date: she doesnt think im into her because i've revealed way too much about myself. kiss her later on that night, make out
2nd date: she invites me to this place for dinner. try to make out and she backs away because she tells me i don't flirt with her enough.(uncomfortable) She doesn't know what i want because she has a fb and wants something more. She doesn't want just a fb from me.
3rd date: go to her place. making out and she is constantly pushing me off her because she doesn't want just to fuck. She wants to know if we are going to be friends, fb or bf/gf. She is getting really into it and im almost fingering her pussy as her hips are gyrating.
4th date: At her place with some vino. i have her panties off, fingering her and she is very reluctant at stroking my dick. She cums yet calls me a pervy. Take her into her bedroom and she gives me her lil lecture on what we're doing, fb, friends or bf/gf, because according to her she dropped her fb because of me. She cums a second time without penetration... lol

Every girl is different... I used to use this line on girls who were frigid all the time. "so if channing tatum walked into this room right now, you wouldn't want to blow him?"

[The Pirate]

By hanging up on you and giving you shit about sex and now texting you back she has handed you the keys to her panties. I would use this against her and make her feel so damn guilty that she would beg to come back, and I`d fuck her. I have used this reverse psychology quite a few times before when girls call me out about sex, as if it was bad and trying to make me feel guilty...

"You disrespected me after inviting you to my home, something I rarely do"
"If you think that is the only thing on my mind, you really have low thoughts about me"
"Now you are gonna make me feel shitty if I feel attracted to you"

Put it out and sqeeze the guilt out of her and she will come crawl wanting to make it good again... Fuck and dump.

[Ilikekane]

(03-31-2013 09:25 PM)chamele0n Wrote:  

I developed a rule where I don't waste time with women that don't put out or are not willing to come watch a movie with me by the third date. I am just sick of wasting time with girls that expect me to waste time chatting with them in cafes indefinitely without any prospect of a reward. I am willing to make exceptions for really hot girls, although not too long. It is soft stupid white knights that encourage this kind of behavior in women.

I am trying to find a way to hint to them what the three-date rule is so they know as I know the majority is dumb as a brick. Take for instance the girl I've been going out with recently. I took her to 4 cafe dates on 4 separate occasions. She is the one calling me 3-4 times a day trying to set up meets. I suggested to her that we could watch a movie at my place. She responded "why not see a movie at the theater?" I told her there is nothing good I'd like to see there and that my movies are better. She said she would not come today or tomorrow with me, hung up, and later texted me saying that she got the sense that I was interested in her purely for sex. Duh, what am I listening to your retarded blabbering about and paying for your meals for? She later texted me that if I expected something sexual I made a wrong bet and that she only has sex with a guy she loves. She now keeps calling and texting me trying to see me again. Needless to say, I'm dumping her.

She's also called me "perfect guy" to me and to a friend she introduced me to. It could be that the problem with some girls is they are trying to up the price for themselves if they feel my true value and that I need to play it down somehow, i.e. lower my DHVs so they don't feel they have to play marriage material with me.

Do you guys have any good ways to hint them they are about to be dumped if they don't get with the program? Or how to avoid them starting the "marriage material" game with me trying to make me wait forever before putting out?

1. This is your fault.

You did coffee date 4x, wtf?

First date as coffee date is ok, 2nd should be something closer to your house/somewhere you can escalate, or just in your house.

So you have to improve how you set up your dates and logistics.

2. Her emotions:

You've made her feel like you're awesome but then you haven't made her feel secure enough to put herself in an easy situation to bang you.

You need to give her a whole range of emotions dude.

Girls may wanna be treated like whores but they don't want to independently act like whores or be seen that way.

3. You're being a baby.

You're gonna dump her because she isn't giving you sex....but it's totally your fault she isn't banging you.

Instead you should just try to understand her perspective better so you can get what you want, she can get what she wants and everyones happy.

4. It seems like you're not even interested in her.


What do you like about this girl?

Why are you bothering spending time with her if she doesn't have anything interesting you wanna talk about?