[Alias]

Hey everyone I'm new to this forum and would like some input on a unique dynamic.

A friend of mine recommended I read a book called "The Game" and I did, ( I have not read "Bang" ) but will be purchasing it this week. I was somewhat intrigued. I did a little research online and figured that inner game was more important. But I also saw that I needed good solid foundation when it comes to starting with women.

Being from Brooklyn and Nyc has made comfortable with talking to anyone. Also very lucky to be exposed to a culture rich city.
I just have a problem with starting with women, I have this blessing and this curse, Let me explain.

I have this really long voluminousness hair, like a lion, that i grow out and donate to kids with cancer. I get it done sometimes and take pretty good care of it. I'm around 6 - 6'1 have a pretty damn good sense of style, been going out in nyc from a young age. slim build and just started working out recently with a personal trainer. But ever since I've had long hair I see people constantly look, stare, smile, whisper, even my friends who wing it with notice it more than I do and tell me, I have girls come up to me and touch my hair or tell me how beautiful it is. I've seen girls blush, have gotten a ton of picture requests, started with my friend to ask about me, start with me, start with me for their friends. I get A LOT of attention from it, good and bad from straight and gay people, all different age groups. One of my best friends is awesome with women has a really good natural game so I kind of just used him as a crutch at times cause i knew that he would always pull and then we can host a few girls at my place later that night or a couple of days later to pre-game and head out. I'm not saying I'm super good looking, I'm not, I just have this very unique look, and im fully aware that alone is not the answer.

So a lot of times I feel like these girls have this perception of me to be some kind of artist, musician, etc... So I feel like I already let these girls "down" if I'm not what they perceived me to be.

When I'm out I truly believe inside that I'm a catch, a fun guy, looking for a fun time, I can be very blunt and straight forward. I can't help myself but I love being chivalrous. I am shy by nature. Its kind of hard for me to be an asshole.

I've been living in Israel for around a year +1/2. Tel-Aviv is a an awesome city with a lot of young people, great vibe etc. I speak Hebrew 75-80% fluently. A few issues I'm having are I go out most of the time with 2 of my friends who are Israeli, good looking, but also barely approach. So I've been starting to go out alone. I frequent the best dance/bars since and because I'm a regular I'm kind of hesitant when it comes to starting with certain girls, I think I'm over analyzing but when the whole clubs sees me talk to a girl get rejected ( that doesn't bother me ) but i feel like because the bar is small and other girls will view me as some horny pig or whatever just going to fuck any decent piece of ass that comes his way. So I feel like I have to be more much careful.
I actually have some pretty decent standards, maybe thats a good and bad thing, bad because i dont get laid as much, good because I feel like women can sense something like that.

Girls here can be very pretentious, And I find myself getting turned off quickly by that as well if a girl is stupid.

I have a lot more on my mind but I'll try and sum things up. I think there are some alpha male traits I carry naturally, and then are some things i do that are very beta. A lot of times here in Israel at least I've gotten some really hot girls numbers esp older women in mid 30's which of whom have either flaked or told me that they are not sexually interested but find me an extremely interesting person. I feel like I once upon a time I could pull 6-7's on any given day back in nyc. Here in Israel I wont even start with them and I stumble for some reason or can't close when it comes to 8-9s+. I also had a fuck buddy which i was sleeping with for about a year. She and I have stopped talking. So maybe at the time I had a high OI factor (over it). To try and help things I completely cut out porn.

I still get that same attention from my hair even here in tel aviv. My main question for you is, What do you think is the best way to approach these women given this dynamic?

For example sometimes I just walk into a bar a girl from a group of 3 girls stands in front me and brushes her hand through my hair, I feel completely lost, I normally just smile and keep on walking. Or sometimes called over by in a girl in a group telling me its her friends birthday and it would be nice if I went over to wish her happy birthday etc.. I feel like sometimes they are just doing it for their own entertainment. Even during the day when I walk down the street I see people stare.

thx

[Matt3B]

There is no best way to approach than just to approach. You're rationalising reasons why you haven't or won't approach such has having beta traits, not having a high of fucking a girl on the regular at the moment, not being the best looking, going to the same bars and so on. This happens with every guy, so don't worry about it too much as you can overcome it.

How many bars are you visiting on the regular? You need to switch it up a bit but also approach the girls in those bars. Who says you're going to fail and get rejected by them (rationalising again) so other girls will get put off and you don't want a bad rep? You won't know until you try. If you're worried about it at first, which naturally you will be, take one of your mates with you and leave him at the bar while you go chat to a girl. If it doesn't work, it doesn't work. At least then you get to go back to your mate and laugh it off and show to anyone that's looking that you're not affected by it. Try that when you're starting off, going solo is hard and takes balls.

If a girl calls you over, shake your head and give the girl the "you, come here" finger instead. That way you're in control of the girl and she is submissive to your commands. It will also work in your favour if you're sitting alone and the girl has to come to you so you have her isolated instead of being the bitch around all her friends. Unless you have tight game and can control a pack of women, I'd recommend doing that.

If you're getting girls coming to you and stroking your hair it's an obvious sign of attraction. Thankfully, I'm pretty quick with my wit when I'm talking to girls but if you're not, then I suggest you write a few lines down to use in that situation to get some flirty conversation going. Something like "is that your equivalent to your chat up line? It's rubbish" or "is this what you do, just stroke random people's hair? Pervert" or "hey girls, I think you need to put your mate on a leash. She's going crazy here". Simple shit like that which will aid you.

You just need to approach. Until you actually just do it, you'll keep rationalising (wrongfully) and keep putting it off. You'll feel better for doing it but make sure you're prepared with a few lines if you're not quick witted. You've got a great "peacock" going on, you should be using that to its full extent.