Game is hard to break down without seeing it first hand, but I'll do my best. Also, I'm no gigolo. Just a guy who was once sort of like you with game.
Quote: (05-25-2010 05:03 PM)mntgoat Wrote:
Couple day later I re-open again while she's working at the cafe, allude to my extensive traveling experiences ... she's giving off blatant IOI's. Blushing, touching face, scratching hands and arms, smiling, laughing at all the retarded shit I'm saying. Then right when she thinks I'm going to ask for the number ... I fucking up and walk away. Working to build attraction and convey that I don't give a shit.
Bad move, although a common one. You needed to close the deal with a date here. Desirable girls are usually only going to extend you the courtesy of giving you the heavy vibe one time. Although girls that are way below your 'value' (fat girls, etc) will keep giving you vibes-but you don't want them. This is your test, pass or fail. She will see what your made of at this point. She knows that you like her, trust me. Walking away without being direct and closing the date, while she's doing everything that she can to show off her sexuality, sends the complete wrong message to her, and does nothing for attraction. That pull away shit is as hold as the hills, and girls will either take it for cheesy or a lack of confidence. They know what it is. It won't completely kill attraction, but it will definitely chill the attraction out considerably, at least compared to a guy who is direct and goes for the kill. At a party you can walk away, and come back, but not in this situation where a day or more will go by.
When your getting the vibe, you need to be the alpha male and close the date. Or at least say something with sexual overtones, so that she knows that she will eventually be taken down by you, when you choose to. Not doing closing the date or using some innuendo communicates that your not confident or experienced enough to do so, despite her considerable flirting. This was your biggest mistake in my opinion, as setting up a date here would have given you a huge advantage. If you had used innuendo, she would have likely had a constant slime trail in her panties waiting for you to come back into the coffee shop. And I'm not a talking shit. Thats the truth.
Quote: (05-25-2010 05:03 PM)mntgoat Wrote:
Two days later I re-open. She's obviously happy to see me, says "hey you!" with a big smile. So we joke around a bit more, she's still laughing at my stupid crap, then a line begins to form and so I ask her for her number and she jumps at the opportunity ... she gives it out with four dudes standing right behind me. I turn around while leaving to see these guys wondering how the fuck I pulled that.
Ok, so she's still open enough to give you the number, but I guarantee she's a little more cautious about you at this point. The magic of perfect game has been broken.
Quote: (05-25-2010 05:03 PM)mntgoat Wrote:
So here's where things get interesting. I know she's working on Saturday so I send her a no-need text "hey... such a beautiful day ... wish I was working at the Cafe." She responds ... "HaHa .. blah, blah, blah." The next week I ask what she's doing on Thursday and invite her to a dinner party.
I would never take a girl to a group dinner party on a first date!! Seriously, what are you thinking? She doesn't want to meet a bunch of other people, she wants to get to know YOU! She doesn't even know you, and its stressful enough and a big enough risk to agree to get together and get to know you, a strange man that is a sexual possibility, let alone a lot of other random people at the same time. If I was a woman, I would think "That sounds absolutely awful". I would make up plans if I didn't have them.
Dude, why would you even WANT to take her around other people, in a close conversational environment, on the first date? Thats a recipe for disaster for so many reasons. First, time to build a personal connection with her is greatly diminished. Trust me, she is forming opinions about you anyway, and you NEED that one on one time to make enough of a connection so that she'll go on a second date with you or even shortly sleep with you.
Second, she could easily connect with someone else there, or otherwise determine that she doesn't like your friends. Theres no social connection with you to keep her around if she doesn't like something about that night in question. There is literally zero redeeming value to that idea. In fact, thats the most asexual date first date idea that I've ever heard. You have to be a sexual THREAT to excite her, not a safe dinner party guy, at least on the first date. Slap yourself for suggesting that to her. Do it now, hard. Feel better? Okay. next.
You need to be in a situation where there is at least the possibility of you seducing her, for you to be considered a sexual threat.
Quote: (05-25-2010 05:03 PM)mntgoat Wrote:
She says she's going to be in a rodeo so I make some goat-riding joke then leave the cafe area. The next day I send her a text "Did u ride a strong bull today? I taught him everything. Meet for a drink tomorrow @ 8:30?" She responds "Hahah, LOL, who is this?" She doesn't know who I am ... apparently she erased or never saved my number. I tell her "It's MntGoat" Then she says she's not 21 and can't go to the bar so I suggest she come over and have dinner with me and my house-mates or we can meet at a non-alcoholic venue in Boulder and she doesn't respond... silence. What now? How should I act when seeing her? Should I send another text? Inviter her to go climbing and if she blows me off then erase from phone?
Like I said, the dinner party suggestion was hugely asexuual, and did not send the right message about you. Thats one reason for the resistance, and likely why she did not save your number, imo. That combined with not closing the deal the first time probably did you in. then you suggested a group dinner party, AGAIN. Whats wrong with you? You also emphasized the fact that you have a bunch of roommates. To a woman, roomates really aren't cool. You have them , and she will know, but don't bring it up until after the first date and don't invite her to have dinner with them until after the first month.
Second, unless your actively dating a girl, dont text. At least not more than once every couple of weeks. Texting sucks balls. Funny is not sexual, and there is not much else that you can do via texting but attempt to be funny, unless your going to start doing big time sexual innuendo via text, which can and does work -sometimes. Women are skittish. You have to be there in person to gauge their responses and to do all of the sexual cues that people can only do in person. Otherwise, texting tends to be wasted communication at best, and communication that will take you backwards at worst (usually this is the case). No texting, and especially no being funny via texting. Trust me, it doesn't help you and it probably gives you an excuse for not having face to face interaction with her. Only one on one face to face interaction will get you laid.
Third, she's not 21, but she still wants to have fun. A non-alcoholic night doesnt sound good, even if thats what your doing. Plus phrasing it like that makes you sound like her elder. Dude, you have yet to walk up to her face to face and set a date for a one on one dinner. Why?? Where did that option go?? What could possibly be better. With the older girls, I would set it up for drinks instead. With a 20 year old, I guess you need to focus on food.
Thats a start. i don't mean to be hard on you, but I want to emphasize where I think you went wrong.
Now you definitely have to give her space. The best thing would be for her to see you successfully socializing with other women who look very happy to be socializing with you. Second best is walking up to her, forget the flirty indirect bullshit, as that ship has sailed, and say you were an idiot because you were nervous and ask her out to a one on one dinner date. Make it super confident, and try not to pose it as a question... Even "I have a table for two on Saturday at....and I want you to join me" is much better than "Would you join me...?" Find the best mix between telling her that your going on a date and not sounding creepy given the past interaction. She might not agree to the date, but I absolutely guarantee this is your best chance and probably your only chance at this point.
Also try"
"Don't be late for our dinner date on Saturday at ....seriously." Playfully direct. Given your past interaction its tough, maybe you want to build report again first. But once she's reacting positively to you, no more fucking around.
And pulling 8-10s is some jedi shit not because its hard, but because when you GET it, then it is easier in a lot of ways than pulling lesser girls, at least with the everyday 8-10s.
They get hit on less. Guys are more nervous around them, and therefore generate less attraction in them. They are absolutely normal horny girls just like every other normal horny girl. Give them no special treatment, dont be nervous, be playfully direct but non-needy, and you'll get that higher caliber woman.
