[alphanov]

I spotted this pretty girl smoking all by herself in the pub smokers' room. She was with a female friend, who did not smoke and stayed at the bar. I did my approach, and she was not very enthusiastic about the encounter (I suspect shyness). However, she was readily telling me about herself, and she casually dropped that she's been single for a month and she enjoys the freedom. Later she mentioned that she'll be continuing to party in some night club with her friends and the guy she's currently fucking (some baker from her job).

Since she was reluctant to ask me anything, I backed off eventually, but this was a big error on my part. I basically had her isolated, shy, looking for casual sex, and failed to escalate things. She went smoking twice, so I had two 3 min windows of opportunity. Any suggestions? (number closing or telling her to quit her friends and afterparty with me is out of the question)

[Dulceácido]

What was the problem? Why didn't you come on to her?

[alphanov]

Because she was shy and showed no interest in me (didn't even ask what do I do in France). She was also quite sober. Then, as soon as she was done with her cigarette, she ran quickly back to her partner. Basically I think the one-on-one interaction with me was very awkward to her, so she would better keep fucking the ugly baker she doesn't really like, rather than hook up with a random stranger that she liked.

[Rutting Elephant]

At least you negged her on the "you're getting bitched by an ugly baker" angle?

[alphanov]

(02-17-2013 08:15 AM)Rutting Elephant Wrote:  

At least you negged her on the "you're getting bitched by an ugly baker" angle?

She didn't say he was ugly or anything, but I assume he is not her prime choice, because she considers herself single and is on the look for somebody better.
I don't see how negging would improve the situation. She was already shy, insecure, quiet, sucking on her cigarette while looking at her own feet. She also blushed and gave me this grateful awkward smile when I said I preferred girls from south of France (where she's from).

[Rutting Elephant]

If she's so shy, why did she confess to a random stranger that she's fucking someone?
Reminds me of a date I went on with a girl who initiated contact online, she worked at a sushi restaurant in Queens. Besides her, there was a fellow waitress and a chef, who were supposedly a couple. Regardless, the second waitress hit up my cousin, who had just tagged along, the next day on Friendster (this was many years ago).

[alphanov]

(02-17-2013 08:37 AM)Rutting Elephant Wrote:  

If she's so shy, why did she confess to a random stranger that she's fucking someone?

Because I prompted her to do so. She asked why am I rolling solo, and I replied that I don't like to mix my private life with my professional life, so I don't go out with my colleagues. She then said that she's having some affair with the baker from her job. On the second occasion when I asked about her plans for the rest of the evening, she said she's going to the club with the baker she's fucking presently.

[Dulceácido]

You could've just thrown it out there and tried to escalate the conversation, I guess. I dunno. There are some times when there just is no vibe. Either escalate or move on to the next girl who is maybe more interested.

[alphanov]

(02-17-2013 09:45 AM)Dulceácido Wrote:  

You could've just thrown it out there and tried to escalate the conversation, I guess. I dunno. There are some times when there just is no vibe. Either escalate or move on to the next girl who is maybe more interested.

I moved on to the next one... but I still think I could have swept up this shy girl. Maybe show appreciation for her friendliness to a random stranger like me (trying to cast a self-fulfilling prophecy on her), be really down to Earth and simple like she is.. and when she's done smoking and wants to leave, grab her by hand, ask to stay a few more seconds, pretend to be anxious, let go, grab again, then try to delicately talk her into seeing me again. She probably wouldn't agree for a date, but maybe I could come to her confectionery shop to pick up some buns. Shit, I didn't even ask which shop

[reino341]

Not sure why you're so caught up in this single girl.

You should've tried to move things forward one way or another, that's the only way to know if this shy girl was interested or not.

[Dulceácido]

(02-17-2013 10:02 AM)alphanov Wrote:  

(02-17-2013 09:45 AM)Dulceácido Wrote:  

You could've just thrown it out there and tried to escalate the conversation, I guess. I dunno. There are some times when there just is no vibe. Either escalate or move on to the next girl who is maybe more interested.

I moved on to the next one... but I still think I could have swept up this shy girl. Maybe show appreciation for her friendliness to a random stranger like me (trying to cast a self-fulfilling prophecy on her), be really down to Earth and simple like she is.. and when she's done smoking and wants to leave, grab her by hand, ask to stay a few more seconds, pretend to be anxious, let go, grab again, then try to delicately talk her into seeing me again. She probably wouldn't agree for a date, but maybe I could come to her confectionery shop to pick up some buns. Shit, I didn't even ask which shop

You could have come off like a total creeper, too. Risky.

[Christian McQueen]

Reading this thread gave me a headache. Your hamster is spinning. Men have hamsters too, learn to control/kill yours.

[alphanov]

(02-17-2013 09:10 PM)McQueensPlayboyRules Wrote:  

Reading this thread gave me a headache. Your hamster is spinning. Men have hamsters too, learn to control/kill yours.

What do you mean? Do you have a valuable suggestion how could have I handled the situation to get the girl? I told you what I did, being a newbie that I am, I just left and moved on. But you, international gurus, should have some better ideas.

[bojangles]

man so she never asked you personal questions? not even where you work? well if you're controlling the conversation you can change the direction of it, you can throw in hooks into the conversation that will make her ask you personal questions.

"you work in the bakery? Are you the one who has been making that darn crusty bread that everyone at work is complaining about?"
"<giggles> noo, i do this, where do you work?"
" Yeah I'm a dream analyser/disposable lighter engineer/ whatever the fuck you want, BLAH BLAH HOOK BLAH BLAH"
" blah blah blah hook blah?"

[Christian McQueen]

(02-18-2013 05:01 AM)alphanov Wrote:  

(02-17-2013 09:10 PM)McQueensPlayboyRules Wrote:  

Reading this thread gave me a headache. Your hamster is spinning. Men have hamsters too, learn to control/kill yours.

What do you mean? Do you have a valuable suggestion how could have I handled the situation to get the girl? I told you what I did, being a newbie that I am, I just left and moved on. But you, international gurus, should have some better ideas.

Here's what I would have done:

"I gotta run but put your number in" (while handing her your phone with the New Contact screen up)

That is called assuming the sale.

Then shoot her a quick text WHILE STILL WITH HER along the lines of this: Its's McQueen that sexy motherfucker you met at (insert name of club/bar)

She gets the text which does 2 things: 1. You will know if she gave you a legit number and 2. Sending a text like this screams CONFIDENT ALPHA.

Then as you turn to leave (you leave first be 'controlling' the situation), grab her by the hand and pull her close and say "When you get bored later tonight with the BakerMan hit me up and we'll meet up"

I fucking dare you to try some shit like that and watch her melt AND more than likely hit you up later that night. Shy girls from my experience need to be LEAD and LEAD STRONG. They also tend to be freaks.

[Christian McQueen]

Also, she told you she was SINGLE and FUCKING SOMEBODY ELSE. This was an easy Smoking Patio Swoop.

And buy a nice lighter. Can't tell you how many girls I've pulled off the smoking patio. In fact I prefer the patio to a table it's that effective.

[alphanov]

Sounds sweet. If I was in the US, this might even work sometimes. Technical problem, they've blocked GSM signals in most of the pubs, so you can't use your phone while inside (the positive side of which is that bitches can't use their phone as an excuse not to talk to you).

The real problem is, I'm dealing with those French countryside girls. As soon as you neg them or be cocky, that comes over as an insult and they get really upset (unless they're drunk and merry with a bunch of friends). Moreover, I have got dozens of numbers and zero dates out of them. They don't date strangers. The weakest part is with "hit me up when you get bored with the BakerMan". She's never gonna hit you up. Girls almost never initiate anything with strangers, even in a clam bake.
Have you read Roosh's latest post about Canadian French? The Danish? It's this much bad here. Being a cocky loudmouth doesn't work. Btw, I know an English exchange student who's just such a gamer. First he was jumping enthusiastically at girls, but nowadays I just see him really low in spirits hanging out with the same old English sluts he knows from home... pathetic failure

[Christian McQueen]

Hmmm...aren't you the guy who uses a 'rape line' when gaming girls as well?

Could be why you have such a high flake ratio....

[alphanov]

(02-18-2013 08:02 PM)McQueensPlayboyRules Wrote:  

Hmmm...aren't you the guy who uses a 'rape line' when gaming girls as well?

Could be why you have such a high flake ratio....

I've started using it since the last couple of nights out. Was being flaked at 100% before that, so it doesn't make much of a difference. Essentially, nothing appears to work here, so I'm experimenting with whatever comes to mind. Got nothing to lose anyway

[Christian McQueen]

(02-18-2013 08:39 PM)alphanov Wrote:  

(02-18-2013 08:02 PM)McQueensPlayboyRules Wrote:  

Hmmm...aren't you the guy who uses a 'rape line' when gaming girls as well?

Could be why you have such a high flake ratio....

I've started using it since the last couple of nights out. Was being flaked at 100% before that, so it doesn't make much of a difference. Essentially, nothing appears to work here, so I'm experimenting with whatever comes to mind. Got nothing to lose anyway

Are French girls this difficult? I've always held the notion that they're easy but I've never been there. Can anyone else shed light on the French girl angle?

[alphanov]

and btw on this particular girl I didn't use the drug line. See, no bang either way...

[reino341]

(02-18-2013 09:12 PM)alphanov Wrote:  

and btw on this particular girl I didn't use the drug line. See, no bang either way...

Bro, whatever you say about not being in scarcity mindset, I can smell that and the negativity through the computer screen.

(02-18-2013 09:12 PM)alphanov Wrote:  

The real problem is, I'm dealing with those French countryside girls. As soon as you neg them or be cocky, that comes over as an insult and they get really upset

Nah, the problem is that your game sucks. Just the fact that a newbie is talking about negs is a huge red flag. You're thinking about negs and being cocky as techniques to getting the girl, so obviously it's going to come off as an insult. Roissy on his blog makes this distinction as caring asshole vs. uncaring asshole. You're coming off as the former.

My advice is that you forget about negs and think of it as playful teasing. Make fun of girls not to seek a reaction out of them but to amuse yourself.

[alphanov]

(02-18-2013 09:17 PM)reino341 Wrote:  

Nah, the problem is that your game sucks. Just the fact that a newbie is talking about negs is a huge red flag. You're thinking about negs and being cocky as techniques to getting the girl, so obviously it's going to come off as an insult. Roissy on his blog makes this distinction as caring asshole vs. uncaring asshole. You're coming off as the former.

My advice is that you forget about negs and think of it as playful teasing. Make fun of girls not to seek a reaction out of them but to amuse yourself.

I approach mediocre girls that I honestly don't give a shit about, have fun talking with them, then ditch them with "hey I gotta go, see ya around". Never did they even suggest exchanging numbers. Never did they look for me again in the same venue. Even when I met them for a second time by chance in some other party, they weren't all over chasing me.

Hey man, I know what I'm talking about. I fucked this American exchange student, right? I said you wanna go for drinks, she says she has a bf, I say I also have a gf, oh so then it's all right. When we're drunk, I say hey you wanna go see this and that in a deserted place, and she's like yeah sure. We're making out, I say let's get back to my place, and she says OK. Man, none of this shit happens in France. None, zero, nada.

[Jaylow]

(02-19-2013 02:35 AM)alphanov Wrote:  

I say I also have a gf, oh so then it's all right.

Then you start making out with her and she says "wait, you have a girlfriend", then you say...?

I agree with Reino.

[alphanov]

(02-19-2013 02:41 AM)Jaylow Wrote:  

(02-19-2013 02:35 AM)alphanov Wrote:  

I say I also have a gf, oh so then it's all right.

Then you start making out with her and she says "wait, you have a girlfriend", then you say...?

I agree with Reino.

Then I said that my gf's a cheating slut. We ended up fucking about 40 times behind her bf's back.