[Juan Antonio]

Yesterday I approached 20 girls at the local college campus. 7 gave me their numbers.

Of the 20, only 2 gave me strong, unwavering eye contact - a German foreign exchange student and a girl from Syria. The rest were local run-of-the-mill 18-22 American college girls. Most could barely look me in the eye for more than 5 seconds. They also won't look you in the eye as their talking and instead will stare at some inanimate object in the distance. One redhead kept looking off into the distance as I was talking to her, and at one point I had to remind her "I'm right here btw".

I realize the post-1990 cohort is borderline autistic and ADD - they've grown up with their faces buried behind a screen whether computers or smartphones and are used to constant stimulation. Yet there are computers and smartphones and Germany and Syria which leads me to believe that this is more of a uniquely American cultural phenomenon problem.

Strong, unwavering eye contact is a necessary requisite for seduction as there exists a natural sexual tension undercurrent between men and women. But if a girl can't look you in the eye, there is no sexual tension and seduction isn't going to happen.

Have other guys here noticed this? What accounts for the inability of young American girls to maintain eye contact and how do we address it?

[Deif]

I hate to say this but I think you're wrong. I hit on the demographic you're referring to almost exclusively and they can and do maintain eye contact if they like you.

Perhaps it's something you're doing wrong. You're pursuing some of the pickiest and most deluded people on the planet. Just by hitting on them it's possible they've already concluded that they're too good for you unless you can override their delusion mechanism with your looks and behavior.

I suggest you observe the guys who seem successful with girls on campus and figure out why they're successful.

[Giovonny]

I talk to young American girls everyday. I have not experienced this problem.

If a girl is not looking at you, well, I think you have not done enough to get her attention!

If you can get an emotional reaction from her, good or bad, she will look you in the eye. If she is uninterested in what you are saying, she will look away from you.

During conversation, we have to take breaks in eye contact. Looking a girl in the eyes too much seems needy. It's better to break eye contact and look away sometimes, it makes you seem more aloof. Don't fixate on her, don't make her the center of your universe.

Eye ball language is important. I used to look at girls in the eye too much and I would look at them with a look that was too serious. Now, I look away often to fake disinterest.

[Tuthmosis]

20 approaches is a lot for an afternoon. Over what period of time where they spread out?

[Juan Antonio]

(09-11-2012 07:04 PM)Tuthmosis Wrote:  

20 approaches is a lot for an afternoon. Over what period of time where they spread out?

This was over the course of a 5 hour span, from about 11:30-3:00 and 6-7:30. When you interact with a wide breadth of college girls while sober in sunlight over a short period of time it really hits you.

[EisenBarde]

Sample size is too small. Approach 100 more for more accurate data.

[deepcov3r]

(09-11-2012 12:55 PM)Juan Antonio Wrote:  

Yesterday I approached 20 girls at the local college campus. 7 gave me their numbers.

Of the 20, only 2 gave me strong, unwavering eye contact -

This is interesting work and good research, at least as a starting point to discuss things.

May I ask, your age, height, look, are you a native speaker of English, other surrounding info. Also, what did you make conversation about? People say "small talk" but there's always a subject...

[dirtman]

This probably isn't the answer you're looking for, but, if you have to remind a girl "I'm right here, btw" it's probably a lost cause.

Most of the girls in the age range you're talking about in America can't handle what most mature men with game bring to the table, and most have their heads squarely up their asses, believing that no matter what, they are special and deserve the best of everything at all times, without having to work for it. Many are just spoiled brats. Being an asshole to them is the only way to go, because it's the only thing they understand. It's fucking sad, really.

Obviously, there are exceptions.

If a girl is really into you, you won't have to remind her to look at you out of a desperation for acknowledgment. Best to just turn and walk away from a chick that's on her phone or staring at some other guy while you're talking to her.

Go for the foreign girls or the rare American girl that *gets it*.

Or, practice being a dick to get their attention and mix up the hot and cold, this seems to be all most american chicks in that age range understand.

[3agle 3yes]

(09-12-2012 03:40 PM)dirtman Wrote:  

...Being an asshole to them is the only way to go, because it's the only thing they understand. It's fucking sad, really.

Wow, the hate on American girls is strong on this forum. I've seen it other places too... Anyway, although my experience with American girls is zero I've dealt with many girls who are apparently similar. Though I have to say, what part of not accepting a girls attitude or drama being an "asshole"? If a girl is constantly approached and told how "hot" she is it's bound to get to their heads.

(09-12-2012 03:40 PM)dirtman Wrote:  

...mix up the hot and cold, this seems to be all most american chicks in that age range understand.

You mean reward or punish according to compliance? This should be the case with ALL girls.

[rationalize_this]

"Eagle Eyes" never having met an American girl, comments on Eye Contact Post about American girls. I love this forum.

[Deluge]

(09-11-2012 01:42 PM)Deif Wrote:  

I hate to say this but I think you're wrong. I hit on the demographic you're referring to almost exclusively and they can and do maintain eye contact if they like you.

Quoted for truth.

It might because you're not being engaging enough, or it could be that the eye contact your giving them is too much to the point that they feel uncomfortable and have to break it.

[dirtman]

(09-12-2012 04:40 PM)3agle 3yes Wrote:  

(09-12-2012 03:40 PM)dirtman Wrote:  

...mix up the hot and cold, this seems to be all most american chicks in that age range understand.

You mean reward or punish according to compliance? This should be the case with ALL girls.

Actually no. I meant that one should be unpredictable. Being there, then not there. Being warm, then aloof.

What if you're aloof when she is compliant? Not always, obviously, because that'd be a bit nuts. But, every now and then, it serves as confusion and unpredictability. And this causes tingle.

Keep them guessing.