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I want to throw my first house party
#1

I want to throw my first house party

Haven't seen a thread on this - so feel free to link to another site if needed.

So - as a foreigner in a somewhat hostile city, I'm thinking of having a house party to expand my social circle beyond the hobbies and bar crowd. Also, I have a pretty big apartment (more than 1,000 sq ft) so also think this would be a way to DHV chicks who ordinarily aren't yet comfortable in coming over. Now, in terms of logistics:

-There are a few girls who I'm interested in and know I'm interested in them - how many of them do I want to limit to in my guestlist - will they talk to each other? Is it bad if they figure out I'm interested in another girl who hasn't put out yet?

-For acquaintances, how do I handle them showing up with people that I'm not cool with

-How should I deal with not inviting people whom I'm not crazy about? There are a few co workers I want to invite but I'm worried that others will find out and resent not coming.

-Male friends - should I just say don't bring dudes unless you clear it with me first?

-What about other dudes at the party hitting on girls that either I or one of my close friends is interested in? I guess the game forum would say that if I'm insecure about her than I have little chance in the first place.

-Music, food, neighbors, hiding my shit, displaying art/books

-Themes/enticements to get people to come (who have otherwise active social lives)

Suggestions?
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#2

I want to throw my first house party

Quote: (09-04-2012 02:15 PM)ao85 Wrote:  

So - as a foreigner in a somewhat hostile city, I'm thinking of having a house party to expand my social circle beyond the hobbies and bar crowd. Also, I have a pretty big apartment (more than 1,000 sq ft) so also think this would be a way to DHV chicks who ordinarily aren't yet comfortable in coming over.

A plan:
  • BBQ at the park: I would start by hosting an "end of Summer" BBQ at a public park. Invite lots and lots of people. I would exclude coworkers, since the less they know about your personal life, the better. Remember: this BBQ is supposed to be work, not leisure! Your goal is to evaluate people's behaviors, their manners, their mental health, how they get along with others, who gets along with whom, etc. At the end of the BBQ decide who to invite to your house party. The recruitment is done.
  • House party: now that you know who to invite, it's time to escalate and throw a house party. Invite a few cool dudes (AMOG's), a few lovey-dovey couples, and the chicks you are interested in. What to drink? I love sangria, and I have arrived at the conclusion that almost everyone loves it to. So, you can buy some 10 liters of wine, some 4 liters of 7up, and a ton of apples, and prepare some 20 liters of sangria. Make it sweet, so that people do not notice how alcoholic it is. You can spike it with a bit of vodka. I also like to prepare Brazilian caipirinhas, but finding cachaça in Russia may not be easy! In my experience, Eastern European chicks find Spanish and Brazilian stuff to be exotic. What about food? Frankly, who needs food? The less the chicks eat, the more the alcohol clouds their judgement! Get your laptop and some loudspeakers, and start with some harmless ambient music that does not discourage conversation. Once the alcohol kicks in, and if you know how to dance and have enough room for an improvised dance floor, you can dim the lights, play some salsa music, and escalate things into a dance party. This would allow you to get physical with the girls. From then on, use your wits.
Oh, if you're in Russia, VKontakte is your friend!!

"The great secret of happiness in love is to be glad that the other fellow married her." – H.L. Mencken
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#3

I want to throw my first house party

Quote: (09-04-2012 02:15 PM)ao85 Wrote:  

-How should I deal with not inviting people whom I'm not crazy about? There are a few co workers I want to invite but I'm worried that others will find out and resent not coming.

-Male friends - should I just say don't bring dudes unless you clear it with me first?

-What about other dudes at the party hitting on girls that either I or one of my close friends is interested in? I guess the game forum would say that if I'm insecure about her than I have little chance in the first place.

Make sure to invite several Indian guys (with no formal game knowledge), then report back.

Tuthmosis Twitter | IRT Twitter
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#4

I want to throw my first house party

I'm a veteran of having thrown several house parties back in college. Here are a few things I learned:

1. Make sure you're the center of attention. It's your house. Your booze. Your hospitality. Make sure everybody knows it (subtly). Don't overplay it though, because people will turn against you.

2. Manage the ratio. We invited all the girls we knew and actually hired a dude to work as a bouncer to ensure excess dudes didn't get in. Worked amazingly. Sometimes had ratios of 2:1 girls to guys at our parties and if you already have a girl lined up pre-party, her eyes will widen the second she walks into the door. You don't even have to use game because the ratio speaks for itself. You can manufacture a setting to unleash a woman's hypergamous instinct in the most gratuitous way with careful planning.

Feel free to think I'm lying, but I fucked girls within minutes of meeting them or aftert a few Facebook chats simply because they were so overwhelmed by the bizzaro land that they'd entered when they attended me and my friends' parties. A girl is thrown completely off balance when she finds that the ratio is no longer in her favor (like it always is) and she has to compete. Most girls will be unable to handle this and can only respond with instinct (read: fuck you).

And I'm talking about attractive girls: 7's and 8's.

3. Serve liquor at your own peril. People will puke. They will break your shit. They will fight. I'd highly recommend you just get a few kegs of beer and serve those up. If you do decide to serve liquor, get the cheapest vodka swill you can find and fill it inside of expensive vodka bottles. Add one of those pouring nozzles at the top for effect. People cannot tell the difference.

4. Make sure your room is clean and that you can host a "party-inside-a-party" within it. Grab a couple bottles of top-shelf vodka and invite a few girls and close guy friends inside. Play some music at medium-volume so you can employ your game. Your status should be so high that you won't really need to use too much game. Assume the sale.

5. Be prepared for physical altercations. When you mix booze, young guys, and hot girls, people will go over the edge. I'm not saying that people will necessarily fight you (they won't, because your value is too high), but guys will fight other guys.

I'm under the assumption here that you've got people to invite and a reasonably large social circle. You guys are probably wondering why I'm on a game forum if I "supposedly" got so much pussy in college: long story short, I moved to a new city after graduation, no longer live on my parents' largesse, and don't have many friends in the area. All of my advantages were undercut.

Hope this helps.
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#5

I want to throw my first house party

I threw a house party once when my parents were out of town way back senior year of high school.

1. The first beer I opened I dropped and it was spinning like a top spraying foam everywhere. I just stared in amazement for a few seconds because I had done so much fucking work to get the whole bash set up.

2. Some chicks got into a violent cat fight in the living room and were throwing shit at each other.

3. I let one of the drunk cat fight chicks lay down in my bed and she barfed everywhere.

I think something like this is likely in store for your house. Make your choice wisely. I'll never do that again.
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#6

I want to throw my first house party

The most important thing to do at your party is to run out of alcohol. Paradoxical, I know. You are not the bar. You want people to leave. You do not want people too drunk in your house. Anything that can happen with 10 drinks will happen with 5. You do not need the drunk crowd cockblocking in your own house because of their refusal to go home until they drink all the liquor.
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#7

I want to throw my first house party

Quote: (09-04-2012 02:15 PM)ao85 Wrote:  

As a foreigner in a somewhat hostile city, I'm thinking of having a house party to expand my social circle

Suggestions?

When inviting a lot of randoms, hold a meet up at a pub or a bar. Have people pay for their own drinks. Let them be assholes there. (Which several will be) Hold on a week night.

If you want to hold a private event, check out the price to rent a private room at your local bars and social halls. The prices usually vary by day-of-week and time. Renting a private room 6-8pm at a local bar on a week night can be surprisingly affordable --I've gotten it down to $50 plus a $75 tip to the bartender. If the cost is too much, find another guy or two you can split the cost with, and share your invites.

Only use your apartment as an after-party location for a few select people coming, after an energetic event. The problem with hosting a loud, rowdy party at your own place is:

1) Unlike a bar, you can't slip away when it gets boring; you're already home. You don't get to sleep until the last guest leaves.

2) The cool people have places to go and leave early. The losers linger. They cling like barnacles and are a pain to get to leave.

3) If one of your guests gets drunk and pukes at a bar, it's the bar's problem. At your house, it's now your problem. And there's no bartender to clean it up, you have to clean it up.

4) When someone's an asshole at a bar, the bartender deals with it. He'll cut them off, or even kicks them out. No blame on you. When it's at your home, it's much more personal. It's impossible to kick someone out of your home and not earn a grudge. Even if they were trying to set your curtains on fire at the time.

5) If you enjoy your own party and get too drunk, the bartender keeps things under control; if you get even slightly drunk at your own home party, it's a short step to waking up covered with markers, your furniture hauled away in a van, and your clothes stabbed with knives until they're ripped to rags. ie. You never get to relax and enjoy your own house party.

[Image: passed-out-guy-covered-in-marker-pen-by-...-prank.jpg]

"Alpha children wear grey. They work much harder than we do, because they're so frightfully clever. I'm awfully glad I'm a Beta, because I don't work so hard. And then we are much better than the Gammas and Deltas. Gammas are stupid. They all wear green, and Delta children wear khaki. Oh no, I don't want to play with Delta children. And Epsilons are still worse. They're too stupid to be able to read or write. Besides they wear black, which is such a beastly color. I'm so glad I'm a Beta."
--Aldous Huxley, Brave New World
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#8

I want to throw my first house party

I'm not big into letting people into my castle, but the easiest method of crowd control I use for house parties is to require everybody to BRING THEIR OWN DATE. No date, no entry.

This rule alone solves the following:
- Unequal ratio is eliminated if you enforce 1:1, any deviance comes from the gays.
- Bitch shields go down because there is at least the pretense that nobody is going stag.
- People stay in check when employing the buddy system.
- Everybody knows who is going home with whom.
- You can keep things pretty low key if you want to avoid the chaos, and since every invite only allows a +1, you can control the number of people a bit better than an open invite.
-The dweebs who creep on girls wont show up and the players who steal yer wymins should, in theory, already be accounted for.

Biggest disadvantages:
-Flaky dates, this works best if you know a lot of people in LTRs.
-Weak social circle, if all your friends are blue pill betas then nobody might even show up.
-Entertainment, there will be a lot less energy and tension in the room, you will be expected to provide some.

This isn't perfect for every situation. I'd say the ideal scenario for this is when you're casting a "small net" where you already have a prospect and you want to build some solid social proof and start your own kool kids klub. It helps you filter friends and prospects and get rid of people who are wasting your time.

If you are casting a "big net", this method won't work. Just throw a rager and tell the dudes you invite not to bring other dudes.
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#9

I want to throw my first house party

Great ideas so far, I'm taking notes as well since I've been wanting to throw better parties.

Another idea could be doing a rooftop/pool party. Not sure about your apartment complex, but some have pools on the rooftop, or just rooftops that people can use.

Doing a BBQ on a rooftop and city skyline seems legit, especially if there's a pool. Then as time passes by, invite some girls back to your apartment below using a ruse.
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#10

I want to throw my first house party

Make sure to delegate.

Think about co-hosting it with someone else. Maybe a couple of your closest friends, or a chick who can get a bunch of female friends to show up and boost the ratio.

If you're supplying booze, you can serve one cocktail in volume. It could be caipirinhas like Icarus suggested. Or something with tequila, vodka or rum. If you do that, put one friend in charge of keeping that cocktail flowing.

When you've got several people invested in running things, it doesn't matter if you disappear for a while with a girl.

Logistics will be hiding all valuables and delicate things or moving them off site ahead of time.

Ideally you should know the most convenient nearby shop for people to buy things (smokes, booze) and know exactly how late they stay open. Also know how to get a taxi to show up to your place.

Stack a bunch of supplies in the bathroom(s) ahead of time so you don't run out.

Arrange in advance for your housekeeper to show up at a reasonable time the next day and sort out the mess.
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#11

I want to throw my first house party

I've never been to a house party that hasn't ended up incredibly lame or a huge disaster.

Off the top of my head I'll just rattle off a couple things that have happened at house parties that either I've been at or one of my close friends has attended.

Girls getting into drunken brawls.

Dude drunk driving and running over other dude.

Dude jumping out of window and dying (this one happened at a frat party my friend went to).

Dude falling off a cliff (he lived). When this happened it actually wasn't a drinking party, but it still scared the shit out of everyone.

Stuff getting stolen.

Someone doing super illegal drugs and doing them in the open.

People throwing up or shitting on the floor.

Gay ass dudes showing up and slashing peoples tires.

Dude whacking off on furniture (as in jizzing onto a sofa or something). This happened at a party I went to, but (thank god) I didn't see it happen.

Girl fucking on her period, this leaves a disgusting smell and ruins whatever object she was banging on.

If your going to have a house party keep it reasonably sized and run a tight ship. Otherwise you'll have a shit ton of problems.
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#12

I want to throw my first house party

I don't think I have the temperament to throw a house party with people I don't know these days. I can't see myself getting through the night without kicking the shit out of someone.
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#13

I want to throw my first house party

Though there are some truly awesome replies on this thread, I get the impression that they are heavily biased towards a U.S. partying ecosystem. However, it looks as though the OP is in Russia, and the Russian partying ecosystem is different. Some remarks:
  • Alcohol: though too many Russian men drink way too much, many Russian women do not drink at all, and also happen to have extremely negative views on men who drink more than is wise to drink. Many Russian girls were raised by their mothers, as their fathers were drunk horny mofos who abandoned their families to have the freedom to keep drinking and scoring pussy. Therefore, if the OP chooses his guests properly, he won't have to clean any vomit from his carpet, and he won't have to worry about drunken brawls either.
  • Many Russian girls live with their parents: which means that they won't drink too much, as they don't want to return home in a state of intoxication. It also means that they did not live the crazy "Greek Life" of U.S. party schools, which means they can get to age 25 largely unspoiled and still believing in love...
  • Russian girls know men: do not be surprised if they refuse to show up at your house party alone. They almost surely will want to bring a girlfriend or two, so they can protect one another from predatory males ;-) They will also ensure that their friends won't drink too much. This is why it's a good idea to invite a few AMOG's to the party: in the pursuit of their self-interest, they will split the groups and neutralize cock-blockers for you, for free!

"The great secret of happiness in love is to be glad that the other fellow married her." – H.L. Mencken
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#14

I want to throw my first house party

Quote: (09-04-2012 09:43 PM)Cookie Wrote:  

Off the top of my head I'll just rattle off a couple things that have happened at house parties that either I've been at or one of my close friends has attended.

Girls getting into drunken brawls.

Dude drunk driving and running over other dude.


Dude falling off a cliff (he lived). When this happened it actually wasn't a drinking party, but it still scared the shit out of everyone.

Someone doing super illegal drugs and doing them in the open.

People throwing up or shitting on the floor.

Gay ass dudes showing up and slashing peoples tires.

Dude whacking off on furniture (as in jizzing onto a sofa or something). This happened at a party I went to, but (thank god) I didn't see it happen.

Girl fucking on her period, this leaves a disgusting smell and ruins whatever object she was banging on.
[Image: tumblr_lvq9j5mIAN1r4ghkoo1_500.gif]
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#15

I want to throw my first house party

Quote: (09-04-2012 09:43 PM)Cookie Wrote:  

Dude whacking off on furniture (as in jizzing onto a sofa or something). This happened at a party I went to, but (thank god) I didn't see it happen.

Off topic, but I have to add: I once saw a guy do that on one of their teachers piano chair (was their kids party). I don't know about you, but I thought it was fucking hilarious.
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#16

I want to throw my first house party

Used to live in a big house with five guys. We'd throw big house parties. We counted almost 300 people at one. It was mayhem. Even had a Bangladeshi neighbour turn up on the doorstep with his buddies swinging a blade threatening to stab people because someone pissed on his car. That's quality trolling.

Will echo what someone else said about having a VIP party for select girls and cool guys in a bedroom. If not I recommend making some areas off limits and locking them off so that you can keep nice furniture and valuables stowed away.

Either that or keeping it a relatively small, sober affair. The marginal benefit of throwing a party doesn't necessarily increase the wilder or rowdier it gets. Your goal is to show off your place and get girls comfortable with coming over so no need to let it get out of hand.

The main way I fucked up getting laid at parties like that was lack of focus. Instead of focusing on closing the deal with one girl I'd wander around enjoying all the positive attention I was getting. Then suddenly it was 7am and all the girls had vanished. Gave great social proof for follow up action though.

"A flower can not remain in bloom for years, but a garden can be cultivated to bloom throughout seasons and years." - xsplat
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#17

I want to throw my first house party

I threw a lot of house parties in my life and let me say this outside of college its a 50/50 proposition at best that it will be worth it. In a city it would probably be better to invite the girls and guys you want to hang out to a pre-game to your house. Make sure you have some decent music, some mike's hard lemonades and beers ( or their equivalents) and a variety of liquors. Then after and hour or two lead the group to a good bar where you can continue the night.

The point of the alcohol is later you can invite a few of the friends (with one of them being the girl you want to bag) back to your house and they will come willingly cause they will know you still have good alcohol. From there just spend time closing the deal with the girl you like (or just want to fuck). The other perk of a pregame is you will likely avoid all the worse drunken behavior since the plan is to get nice and then go to the bar.

Lastly don't even do this unless you can afford a noise ticket cause that is a real risk when doing this. Its sort of expensive overall but its a fun way to occasionally celebrate.
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