[plague]

this is my first thread, be gentle.

I went out with a girl last night and we went back to her place. while making out on her bed she kept complaining that I was being too rough. this was confusing to me, so I said "I'll be gentle" and kept doing the same thing. she kept stopping me and saying "seriously, you are being way too rough". I couldn't tell if this was a shit test, some type of mild role playing, or if she was dead serious and perhaps had some personal issues.

I am rough but no other girl has ever complained, if anything they usually get excited and escalate it.

we were able to find a compromise, but there was some serious resistance going on. I would pull her bra down, but she would eventually pull it back up. I would start to pull her pants down but she kept stopping me. I was only able to obtain a half-bang - I tit fucked her, which was phenomenal since she has enormous breasts. but I am wondering if I could have played it differently and obtained the bang.

anyone ever been in a similar situation?

[astro]

Yes, most of us have been in the situation. Agree and escalate. Unless she is outright saying "NO" or pushing you off of her, she just doesn't want to be seen as a slut. Although, in my experience, if you're in-tune with her level of arousal you can navigate past any resistance by giving attention to certain parts of her body (each woman is different). Do NOT engage any sort of logical function of the brain, that is a killer - it's like you unplug them from the Matrix.

One of the things I usually do, early on, is to insert comments in to conversation that basically state anything that happens is MY fault. It's pretty effective, but so psychologically unintuitive (ahhh women).


As for rough... some girl bit my goddamned nose the other night. Gotta watch out for the biters

Hope some other members chime in. Always good for pointers.

[Basil Ransom]

Ain't no such thing as a half-bang. Moving on...

This reminds me of two kinds of girls I've encountered:

1. The feminine sweet/nice girl who isn't actually into me - I had a couple girls that I went on dates with that I never ended up banging, and one I did but it quickly unraveled after that. The common thread with these chicks was that they wanted a boyfriend it seemed like, but they decided I wasn't boyfriend material for whatever reason.

2. The masculine chick who resents a man asserting his control before she has decided that she digs you or not. Unlike most other, more feminine girls who are turned on by an aggressive man, these chicks can find it increasingly annoying, to the point where they will reject you eventually after constantly swatting you away.

She sounds like a number 2 type chick. She wants things on her schedule, and resents a man who tries to change that. Often these chicks make the first move. Honestly, I don't know how to really win with these chicks, because if she's not down to fuck you that night, you may just have to wait it out. They can be pretty stubborn.

The best course of action with them is to just try and turn them on as much as possible, to the extent she allows you, eg fingering. Don't neglect any part of her body and make her feel, with your body that you're overwhelmed with desire. Breathe deeper, kiss harder. Take it easy on the removing clothes bit, play that a little smoother. Then get her horny enough to where she's down to bang. Still, I've fingered plenty of girls who wouldn't fuck that night, despite several digitally induced orgasms.

And +1 to astro's point about agreeing - never disagree with her. If she says "we're not having sex tonight" just respond in a neutral, even aloof tone, "Okay."

[AntiTrace]

putting all game psychological shit to side...

are you sure you seriously werent being to rough? Like grinding your teeth into her gums while making out rough?

[UgSlayer]

Yeah I can't tell for sure, because i wasn't there to hear the tone of her voice, body language, etc.

But, usually if a girl tells you that you're being too rough more than once, she doesn't like it.

Tip: Don't be too rough during foreplay. Pull her hair a bit, gently bite on her lip, but that's it. The time to get rough is when you have your penis inside of her. Some girls really do like it rough. One girl loved it when I made her lips bleed and bit on her tongue really hard.

So it depends with foreplay. Some chicks love it, some chicks don't. All chicks love rough sex, though.

[plague]

thanks for the feedback guys. my primary question was whether she seriously didn't like it or was playing a game. it sounds like it was the former. that's what I eventually assumed in the moment and mellowed out a bit in order to move things forward, they just didn't move as far as I would have liked.

there was some mild bickering for a few minutes as we kept starting and stopping. at one point she said "haven't you ever met a woman who likes to take control?". I responded with "what are you talking about, women don't like to be in control".

I don't think I was being too rough because I'm the same way with every girl, and have never received a single complaint. they usually either become super submissive (while indicating that they are enjoying it) or actively provoke me in order to increase the roughness. during foreplay all I'm really doing is gentle bites, hair pulling, and firm groping, very similar to what UgSlayer mentioned above. usually they say something like "you're kind of rough, I like it" as if it is new to them, unlikely as that seems.

she implied that she had her period as a reason that I couldn't remove her pants. I have no idea if it was true.

[UgSlayer]

(04-28-2012 10:47 PM)plague Wrote:  

thanks for the feedback guys. my primary question was whether she seriously didn't like it or was playing a game. it sounds like it was the former. that's what I eventually assumed in the moment and mellowed out a bit in order to move things forward, they just didn't move as far as I would have liked.

there was some mild bickering for a few minutes as we kept starting and stopping. at one point she said "haven't you ever met a woman who likes to take control?". I responded with "what are you talking about, women don't like to be in control".

I don't think I was being too rough because I'm the same way with every girl, and have never received a single complaint. they usually either become super submissive (while indicating that they are enjoying it) or actively provoke me in order to increase the roughness. during foreplay all I'm really doing is gentle bites, hair pulling, and firm groping, very similar to what UgSlayer mentioned above. usually they say something like "you're kind of rough, I like it" as if it is new to them, unlikely as that seems.

she implied that she had her period as a reason that I couldn't remove her pants. I have no idea if it was true.

Wow to me it sounds like you got lucky with the tit fuck. You engaged her logically too many times. Do not, under any circumstances give her a straight answer when she challenges you right before sex. I would even go as far to say as don't say anything or be like "you're right" and keep going. Whenever a girl says something resembling LMR, which I don't really get anymore, I just look up at her and give a sly smirk, then go back to doing what you were doing or adjust accordingly if you think you're going too rough. This acknowledges that you've heard her and reassures her, but doesn't turn on that logical part of the brain where she starts analyzing the situation.
Hope this helps.

[MidniteSpecial]

Sometimes you have to feel out the situation...especially the first time with a girl who may have been abused. You got to be real gentle and move real slow....once she said you were being to rough you should of mixed in a little soft massage or slow strokes of the pussy over the underwear, with slow kisses on her neck etc....don't want to give away all the secrets but she would have responded better to that I bet.

[WesternCancer]

(04-28-2012 08:59 PM)astro Wrote:  

Yes, most of us have been in the situation. Agree and escalate. Unless she is outright saying "NO" or pushing you off of her, she just doesn't want to be seen as a slut. Although, in my experience, if you're in-tune with her level of arousal you can navigate past any resistance by giving attention to certain parts of her body (each woman is different). Do NOT engage any sort of logical function of the brain, that is a killer - it's like you unplug them from the Matrix.

One of the things I usually do, early on, is to insert comments in to conversation that basically state anything that happens is MY fault. It's pretty effective, but so psychologically unintuitive (ahhh women).


As for rough... some girl bit my goddamned nose the other night. Gotta watch out for the biters

Hope some other members chime in. Always good for pointers.

I hate biters and ticklers so much. I once pushed a girl out of bed because she wouldn't stop, she started tickling me and I full on pushed her out of bed and she landed on her ass. Didn't end too well. Whatever, fuck it.

[Spike]

(04-28-2012 08:48 PM)plague Wrote:  

this is my first thread, be gentle.

I went out with a girl last night and we went back to her place. while making out on her bed she kept complaining that I was being too rough. this was confusing to me, so I said "I'll be gentle" and kept doing the same thing. she kept stopping me and saying "seriously, you are being way too rough". I couldn't tell if this was a shit test, some type of mild role playing, or if she was dead serious and perhaps had some personal issues.

I am rough but no other girl has ever complained, if anything they usually get excited and escalate it.

we were able to find a compromise, but there was some serious resistance going on. I would pull her bra down, but she would eventually pull it back up. I would start to pull her pants down but she kept stopping me. I was only able to obtain a half-bang - I tit fucked her, which was phenomenal since she has enormous breasts. but I am wondering if I could have played it differently and obtained the bang.

anyone ever been in a similar situation?

As a natural sceptic i find this a weird story. Give us some more info.
- How long do you know the girl? how many dates ?
- in what way were you being too rough ? what were you doing with her?
- why do you pull down a bra? just unlock it so she cant put it back on without some work.

I find it very strange that a girl who tit-fucks with you doesn't like it rough or doesn't fuck.

Did you bust on her breasts or face ?

[soup]

Don't ever pull down a bra.

- why do you pull down a bra? just unlock it so she cant put it back on without some work.

[Roosh]

Not every girl can take dick in the same way.

You were being too rough, in all likelihood. Newbs tend to think anything a girl does is a shit test.

[HiFlo]

(04-28-2012 08:48 PM)plague Wrote:  

this is my first thread, be gentle.

I went out with a girl last night and we went back to her place. while making out on her bed she kept complaining that I was being too rough. this was confusing to me, so I said "I'll be gentle" and kept doing the same thing. she kept stopping me and saying "seriously, you are being way too rough". I couldn't tell if this was a shit test, some type of mild role playing, or if she was dead serious and perhaps had some personal issues.

I am rough but no other girl has ever complained, if anything they usually get excited and escalate it.

we were able to find a compromise, but there was some serious resistance going on. I would pull her bra down, but she would eventually pull it back up. I would start to pull her pants down but she kept stopping me. I was only able to obtain a half-bang - I tit fucked her, which was phenomenal since she has enormous breasts. but I am wondering if I could have played it differently and obtained the bang.

anyone ever been in a similar situation?

wow man, this same exact thing happened to me last night!!!

I just ignored her verbally and kept plowing on. The whole time she kept saying "no, no, no" but her body language was totally different & she loved it. haha, wish I could help you but some girls are just a little kooky.

I think the main thing is to never say "sorry I was being rough." Make no excuses for ur horniness and the women appreciate ur honesty

[Screwston]

Start off slow and gradually get rougher/speed up.

[plague]

(04-29-2012 04:33 AM)Neil Skywalker Wrote:  

As a natural sceptic i find this a weird story. Give us some more info.
- How long do you know the girl? how many dates ?
- in what way were you being too rough ? what were you doing with her?
- why do you pull down a bra? just unlock it so she cant put it back on without some work.

I find it very strange that a girl who tit-fucks with you doesn't like it rough or doesn't fuck.

Did you bust on her breasts or face ?

no doubt that it is a weird story.

it was our 2nd date. I met her online and have only known her for about a week.

we were making out on her bed, I was holding her firmly with some gentle biting and hair pulling. this is why I was so surprised when she kept stopping me and saying I was being too rough. in hindsight I think she might have meant "aggressive" instead of rough.

I only pulled down the bra because she wouldn't let me unlock it. at first she wouldn't even let me pull it down. eventually I could get one side down and work on that breast - when I would switch to the other she would then pull it back up. it was ridiculous. eventually she gave in and let me unlock the bra.

I also tried to gently, gradually pull down her pants multiple times, as well as gently touch her crotch a few times. all were repeatedly denied.

she was on her back so I busted in between her breasts, although most of it ended up on her neck.

[xmlenigma]

Without being there cant really know what.. But, she did not say stop it.. right.. or i am getting hurt (happened when I bit/nibbled on titties too hard).. she meant she's not turned on enough for the rough stuff yet.. Slow it down, heat her up.. for the more aggressive touch that you have..

PS: Di Carlo Escalation Ladder.

I'd typically not pull the bra & panties but work on heating her up.. when she's wet enough she'll tear both off and ask for IT.

[loverboyy]

Learn how to fuck properly

Her saying you're too rough/aggressive = you're being needy (ie. u need sex to make yourself feel good, validate yourself ect.)

She wanted you to fuck her but SLOW down man, turn her on for an hour, give her orgasms, then you can build up to being "rough" if that's what she likes.