So a lot of people I know have been going online to find some girls to date. The online world of dating has it's good qualities and bad qualities, and I will give you some reasons why:
First with the Good:
The Light At The End Of The Tunnel
If you have gotten this far, and you still want to give it a try, luckily, there are the few girls online who are relatively normal and worth dating. They are truly only 5% (max) of the girls on these sites, but if you're like me and you're in a weird situation, it's worth checking out. A lot of the girls I have met were going through ex-boyfriend issues, but there were a few that I really enjoyed hanging out with (and hooking up with), and still somewhat continue to talk to.
The sites I've tried:
Okcupid & Pof.com
Okcupid is where all the nerdy girls go to find their nerdy boyfriends. Basically filled with the characters from Freaks and Geeks. Not bad, but there is a vibe of supposed intellectual-elitism I don't like about the girls who tend to go on the site.
Pof is the less educated free personals site. Most of the girls here don't go or haven't gone to college. A lot of them are basically working (not hooker-working) girls who are basically alright. The girls on here are a bit more attractive (on average, though you will find some more "trashy" chicks on here as well). I'm just starting out on this one, but so far I like the looks of the girls on this site better. The site itself is shit. The design is shit, and the way they handle the pics makes everyone look like shit. It is free, though.
Technique
1) Pictures are the most important part of the profile. You are basically advertising yourself in 5 seconds. Find pictures of you that girls you know find attractive. Also, try to have pictures of you in social settings. First thing you're doing online is making sure she knows you're normal.
2) What girls are basically looking for is to make sure you are normal. What this means is watch out for warning sign keywords. lolcatz and internet humor for the most part do not work or translate well. It's hard to show sarcasm through text, so be vague and don't start rambling about your life. Most important step here is to show that you have a sense of humor. Also, don't do the whole list thing. Almost nobody bothers to read through it.
3) The first message is very important. You should scan her profile for something you can write to her about, and send her a short quick message. (also, OKcupid has an IM feature which is what I find to be the most successful tool for communication)
4) Exchange #s and set up a meeting. I usually choose a big bar and we have a couple of drinks and from there it's easy as cake.
Prepare yourself for a lot of flakes, and a lot of unanswered messages. Online game is really a test of determination, but if you've got the time and the need, your results will come. I, personally, would consider hooking up with 1/20 of the girls you exchange messages with online a relative success for online gaming.
At this point I haven't tried match.com or the other sites, and I don't think I will, because I'm at the point where I'm basically over online "dating". I'm going to focus on finding a good wingman and getting my real game back on track.
First with the Good:
- Easy way to communicate with a lot of girls
- You can send out a hundred messages in an hour and if done well, can get some leads
- When you're on a dry-spell, it's a decent way to keep flirting and get back in the game
- The quality of girls online is average, and above-average at best. Girls who come online are either pretty ugly and can't find dates in real life (60%), are decent looking girls with ex-boyfriend issues (or some other issues)(35%), the occasional girl who's new in town looking for a way to find some people to hang out with(4%), or a girl looking to just get laid(1%).
- Girls get bombarded with messages from tons of desperate guys because of the relative downside for the nerdy desperate guys to approach online, so the girl plays the role of the picky chooser online. Kind of like a bad weekend night times 1000. Not strategically good from a male standpoint.
- 90% of regular flirtation (body language, tone, facial gestures) is lost, so it all has to do with being able to communicate yourself in a way that catches her attention.
The Light At The End Of The Tunnel
If you have gotten this far, and you still want to give it a try, luckily, there are the few girls online who are relatively normal and worth dating. They are truly only 5% (max) of the girls on these sites, but if you're like me and you're in a weird situation, it's worth checking out. A lot of the girls I have met were going through ex-boyfriend issues, but there were a few that I really enjoyed hanging out with (and hooking up with), and still somewhat continue to talk to.
The sites I've tried:
Okcupid & Pof.com
Okcupid is where all the nerdy girls go to find their nerdy boyfriends. Basically filled with the characters from Freaks and Geeks. Not bad, but there is a vibe of supposed intellectual-elitism I don't like about the girls who tend to go on the site.
Pof is the less educated free personals site. Most of the girls here don't go or haven't gone to college. A lot of them are basically working (not hooker-working) girls who are basically alright. The girls on here are a bit more attractive (on average, though you will find some more "trashy" chicks on here as well). I'm just starting out on this one, but so far I like the looks of the girls on this site better. The site itself is shit. The design is shit, and the way they handle the pics makes everyone look like shit. It is free, though.
Technique
1) Pictures are the most important part of the profile. You are basically advertising yourself in 5 seconds. Find pictures of you that girls you know find attractive. Also, try to have pictures of you in social settings. First thing you're doing online is making sure she knows you're normal.
2) What girls are basically looking for is to make sure you are normal. What this means is watch out for warning sign keywords. lolcatz and internet humor for the most part do not work or translate well. It's hard to show sarcasm through text, so be vague and don't start rambling about your life. Most important step here is to show that you have a sense of humor. Also, don't do the whole list thing. Almost nobody bothers to read through it.
3) The first message is very important. You should scan her profile for something you can write to her about, and send her a short quick message. (also, OKcupid has an IM feature which is what I find to be the most successful tool for communication)
4) Exchange #s and set up a meeting. I usually choose a big bar and we have a couple of drinks and from there it's easy as cake.
Prepare yourself for a lot of flakes, and a lot of unanswered messages. Online game is really a test of determination, but if you've got the time and the need, your results will come. I, personally, would consider hooking up with 1/20 of the girls you exchange messages with online a relative success for online gaming.
At this point I haven't tried match.com or the other sites, and I don't think I will, because I'm at the point where I'm basically over online "dating". I'm going to focus on finding a good wingman and getting my real game back on track.