Quote: (10-24-2014 11:04 PM)Nomad77 Wrote:
I know being seen as a provider is looked on with disdain on here. Everyone wants to be the Casanova of Lovers but IF you are looking for a relationship you may want to reconsider. I am never seen as a provider and always as a lover. But if I want to have a relationship with a girl that is sometime more than sex then it can be difficult. No one wants to enter into a relationship with a guy who may cause her emotional harm. With would she build something with someone that is likely to just take off? Recently, an Instadate Russian doctor asked me point blank do I consider myself emotionally responsible for other people?
When I want to have a relationship with a girl. I show her some provider qualities. I talk about my pass LTRs, I show her photos, I talk about my family, I talk about kids, etc. How much of this I need to do will depend on the woman. But I know that if I am viewed as 100% Lover that my chances of having a relationship with any woman is extremely low. A good balance for American women is 60/40: 60% lover and 40% provider. FSU women may need it to be more like 40/60.
Think of it this way: would you have a relationships with a girl you consider to be a big slut? So why would a woman want to have a relationship with the male equivalent of a slut, the Player? This is also the reason why a lot of guys on here will get a SDL but never see the girl again. She just wanted to have some fun that day so she chose someone who she knew would provide exactly that. Recently a friend of mine made a remark to me that I felt was so true: he said he felt like a gigolo that wasn't getting paid.
It all comes down to what you want.
Want to "just fuck"? Well, put your gigolo hat on.
Looking for a wife? You better have you shit together in life.