Yea I feel like the feminine in me gets the best of me. I just finished reading "The Way of the Superior Man" (recommended by the G) and it talks a lot about masculine and feminine energies.
On the one hand I fantasize with being with a girl forever and the whole lovey dovey thing, but on the other my masculine wants a girl with a couple more points on her and who's more of a challenge. I swear I'm starting to get addicted to the histericas, to the point that they can't show interest unless they mix in enough resistance, or I lose interest.
I improve myself everyday, but at the same time I feel like the girl I truly want wouldn't want to be with who I am now, but she would want the improved version of myself that I'll be in a year. But I can't just hold back feeling and be all cold till then... I just want to meet girls and make them feel as wonderful as I can while getting my needs met as well. It just feels like theres going to be plenty of darkness along this journey as well.
On the one hand I fantasize with being with a girl forever and the whole lovey dovey thing, but on the other my masculine wants a girl with a couple more points on her and who's more of a challenge. I swear I'm starting to get addicted to the histericas, to the point that they can't show interest unless they mix in enough resistance, or I lose interest.
I improve myself everyday, but at the same time I feel like the girl I truly want wouldn't want to be with who I am now, but she would want the improved version of myself that I'll be in a year. But I can't just hold back feeling and be all cold till then... I just want to meet girls and make them feel as wonderful as I can while getting my needs met as well. It just feels like theres going to be plenty of darkness along this journey as well.