Quote: (02-20-2019 12:04 AM)NoMoreTO Wrote:
I'm in my late 30s and have a pretty tight group of buddies from high school and before. I also have university friends who I am still tight with and newer buddies who I know through work and mutual friends. I remember in my 20s my buddy told me that I could sleep in the same room as his girl and I wouldn't bang her, and guess what.... he was right. But these are all respectable guys from the same small town, all from decent families.
Your problem might be deciphering the difference between a 'buddy' - someone who you go for beers with, workout with, or go golfing with and a real friend. A real friend you can do all those things with too, but you can count on them.
Just like the saying you cant turn a "ho into a housewife" , you can't take a lizard brain buddy, who may be hilarious, a good wingman, fun to party with, and trust him as a real friend. Just like chicks, watch for social climbers.
If I were you I'd consider figuring this out, try to find some real friends. As you get older, it is a little harder.
Also - disagree with poll question, you can have both. For me the quality woman is much harder to find.
I appreciate the response and respect your experience. I think that having an All American high school or college experience certainly sets the tone for whether you will have lifelong loyal friends or not.
I've had three separate groups of friends, one in high school, one in college, one after that I considered true friends. All ended up fucking me over for different reasons.
I'll admit that I'm guilty of making friends with mostly social climbers. A lot of guys that want to be friends with me are friends with me because they see me as a ticket to getting pussy. This is always in the back of my head as I make friends with guys of lower SMV. Most of them even outright tell me that they like being friends with good looking guys, "they can learn from me," etc.
One question that I challenge you with is how many truly difficult times that you've experienced that caused you to dramatically lose status within a social circle, particularly one with other women. Have you ever been in a spot where your friends would lose face by continuing to be friends with you?