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Thailand: A good country for older men.
#1

Thailand: A good country for older men.

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Most comments here about Thailand are about sex and alcohol. Not this post. This will be about long-term living in Thailand. My point of view is that of a retired man, but most of my comments will apply to men of all ages.

I’m a retired American, former business owner, living in Thailand now 10+ years. All my life, people described me as “a thoughtful individual”. “You do think for himself,” was a comment I heard often. Sometimes it was meant as a compliment. (I read all the books by Ayn Rand.) This post is for other men who are similar. Especially older men who are looking for a safe and comfortable place to live in retirement.


Part 1: Where to escape?

People often ask why I selected Thailand, but I don’t tell them. Instead, I make up palatable reasons about warm weather, delicious food, polite people, etc. But those aren’t the real reasons I’m in Thailand.

The real reason is to escape from what life has become in the USA (as well as other English-speaking countries). It’s a long list of troubles. Here’s the short version:

1. Rise of Feminism
2. Insanity of Political Correctness
3. Diversity as the new religion
4. Spread of the Police State

The main factor was not that Thailand is so wonderful, but where could I escape that was far, far, away from those four threats to my comfort and well-being.

Before making my decision, I traveled to other countries and looked carefully. For an older, white man, Thailand was the best I could find. Since arriving here, I’ve traveled around a bit more in the Far East. Thailand is still the best I can find. Here’s why:


Part 2: The Attractions

Most important, Thailand is lacking in #1-4 above. So this list of attractions will begin with #5.

5. Most people are respectful most of the time.
Especially to older, white, men. This is “a good country for old men”.

6. All the “comforts” of home are available.
Easy to get good rib eye steaks and Burger King Whoppers. Plenty of good books in English (both real books and e-books). Modern tech toys, from computers to mobile phones. Good hospitals and good dentists. And on and on. There isn’t anything I’ve wanted or needed in over 10 years that I haven’t found here, or couldn’t order and bring in easily.

7. “Help” available to make daily life relaxed and comfortable.
The maid does my laundry and ironing, sweeps and mops the floor, cleans the bathroom and, yes, “does” windows. Massage ladies come to give me Thai-style massages, at home, 2-3 times each week. Delivery services bring my orders from the supermarket and the butcher shop (those rib eye steaks), and deliver hot meals from nearby restaurants (such as Burger King).

8. Cost of living can be whatever level is comfortable.
Thailand has a reputation as “cheap”. 10-20-and-more years ago it certainly was, but no longer. Inflation is steadily upward. The Thai currency is strong against the dollar. So it’s no longer cheap, but there are a lot of choices in every price range.

9. There are plenty of other expats here already.
We are slightly unusual, but not “freaks”. Nor are we so rare as to be tempting targets for scams. My white face will never blend in here, but that’s not my goal. I can go anywhere, do almost anything, with no problems and no restrictions as a foreigner.

10. People generally do not meddle in others’ lives.
That’s characteristic of Orientals in general, but especially so in Thailand where the Buddhist culture encourages minding one’s own business. If I’m deep into a good book, and decide to read until 3:00 AM, no one will ask why my lights were on so late at night. If I go away to a seaside resort for a week, the only person who may notice is the security guard, but he won’t care. When a massage lady comes into my apartment and stays for a few hours, the neighbors won't start gossiping.

11. There’s a basic freedom to do with your body whatever you want.
That can be good or bad, but, in my case, I try various health supplements with no problems. A few examples: The solvent DMSO is reported to be helpful for stiff joints. In the USA there are restrictions on buying it. Here, I just walked in to a chemical supply company, put money on the counter, and walked out with a large, 1 litre, bottle. Sodium Bicarbonate is helpful for balancing acidity-alkalinity of the body. Tiny amounts can be bought in any grocery store (Arm & Hammer), but I wanted to try taking baths in it. When I went to buy 50 lbs, there were no questions what I would be doing with a big bag of white powder. The hormone testosterone can be useful for older men. In the USA, a doctor’s appointment and prescription are required. Here, just walk into a pharmacy and ask for it. (Not all pharmacies carry testosterone — need a larger, fully equipped store, but not difficult to find.)

12. Older men with younger women is the normal state of affairs in this part of the world.
My first girl friend when I arrived in Thailand was 27 years younger — my age 61 compared to her age 34. She didn’t see anything unusual with that at all. Older men here are desirable to younger women because we are seen as more stable, and, usually, better off financially.


Part 3: But it’s not perfect.

The language can be a problem. Takes patience and some forward planning. But, even then, the language is so different that it can be frustrating at times.

Other foreigners visiting or living here are starting to cause problems. Because prostitutes and alcohol are so easily available in Thailand, it attracts men from around the world who crave prostitutes and alcohol. Their bad behavior can tarnish the reputation of all expats here.

Thai women are, intellectually, not interesting. When the physical attraction wears off, as it always does, what’s left? Not much. I’ve handled that fact by not marrying — just rent as desired.

Standards of health and hygiene are poor. There are ways that an individual can improve on the low standards, but it takes careful thought and planning. For example, street food and beach food won’t be clean or refrigerated. If you intend to eat it, then buy in advance a supply of charcoal capsules, antacid tablets, and anti-diarrhea medicine.

The culture here is an ocean of lies. Everybody lies, most all the time, about almost everything. Even when there’s no benefit to them, they lie. It’s just in the culture. Learning to catch the lies, and learning how to handle them, is as difficult as learning the language. On the other hand, I’ve discovered that my personal policy of honesty is highly valued and much respected here.


Part 4: Conclusion

As an older man, a thoughtful and independent man, I’ve found life in Thailand far better than life in the USA over the previous 20-30 years. It’s not effortless, but, overall, I know of no place better.

I welcome questions and comments on any of this, including contrary views. And I encourage private messages, too, for personal conversation.

- M.R.G.

Bangkok, Monday, 11 Sep 2017
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