Quote: (01-04-2017 06:28 PM)kmhour Wrote:
I think most of the people in the thread (who aren't piling on) are taking the tough love approach. This forum doesn't pull punches and tends to call bullshit without fear unlike a lot of other places. And if you've seen someone young squander money - especially where substance abuse is involved - you tend to be somewhat jaded about the future prospects.
Your initial intent may have been to figure out how to get control of the bonds, but internet forums don't necessarily work that way. Pretty much everyone on RVF believes in the importance of a strong father figure and so some of the reaction is inevitable when you're coming off like someone disrespectful of the 'institution'. I do think some of it is unfair and the perspective of someone with a loving and attentive father can be very different. If you're thinking about a family of your own, I hope you're taking notes.
As far as proving your dad wrong, take whatever motivation out of it you can. I said before, whether you re-issue the bonds or play out some ruse at the bank, your concern really needs to be making sure you take the opportunity and make the most of it. Don't squander it. You want to start a family? This is training wheel stuff. Make smart financial decisions. Have an appropriate future time orientation. Don't fuck it up.
I appreciate you giving me a serious response.
I understand the whole "tough love" and "calling people out on their bullshit" thing. I really do. That's one of the things I actually like about this forum.
I also understand the whole "respecting your father" thing. It is only natural that most people here would think I'm an asshole for not respecting my dad. It is interesting, though, that some of the people who were more understanding of my situation were people who don't have good relationships with their fathers.
What I don't like is when people just call me names or post insulting GIFs without offering any constructive criticism at all, when I've done my best to speak to everyone as respectfully as possible.
I guess people are gonna post what they want, though, and it's no use getting mad or frustrated about it.
You're absolutely right that this is an opportunity to prove my dad wrong and begin to build a life for myself, and that I need to be responsible and be very careful not to squander the money.
I have actually been having doubts about going through with this, but I realize that those doubts come from a fear that I will fuck up and regret it later on Part of me would just rather stay at daddy's house and not have to worry about taking on a serious responsibility. However, I can't just keep living at home because I am afraid of what will happen if I leave. I need to just man up and take care of my shit, and that includes moving out and supporting myself financially.
I will let you know how it goes.