It is hard to fake confidence, it is easy to tell somebody to be confident but people have a keen radar for fakeness.
Confidence comes from being successful, in my opinion people aren't actually attracted to confidence, they are attracted to success. Confidence works because its the clothing that successful people are most often found wearing. If you recently suffered a breakup or firing or whatever you are going to have a hard time. You can cheat a little, channel success in one endeavor into confidence in another. Really you just have to gut through a bunch of failure and eventually realize it doesn't hurt all that bad, that approaches are actually pretty fun. Even when you are good at this you will get denied more often than not. Pappaya is totally correct.
Getting good at girls is like getting good at math or computers, it isn't this impossible high aptitude thing you need to be born into. Its just that at some point in life people decide they aren't math people or aren't computer people and give up on any effort to develop the skill before they've tried. For me the biggest source of hesitation has always been time and money. I hate blowing 100 bucks on a night out just for a taxi ride and a couple drinks. I hate listening to some bullshit story about a funny thing some girl's cat did the other day, sometimes it feels like they all talk about the same shit. I find that if I don't put outings on my calendar and allot a portion of my budget to going out then I just wont do it. Once I'm committed to an outing and have the funds set aside it gives motivation to try and make the most of it.
Confidence comes from being successful, in my opinion people aren't actually attracted to confidence, they are attracted to success. Confidence works because its the clothing that successful people are most often found wearing. If you recently suffered a breakup or firing or whatever you are going to have a hard time. You can cheat a little, channel success in one endeavor into confidence in another. Really you just have to gut through a bunch of failure and eventually realize it doesn't hurt all that bad, that approaches are actually pretty fun. Even when you are good at this you will get denied more often than not. Pappaya is totally correct.
Getting good at girls is like getting good at math or computers, it isn't this impossible high aptitude thing you need to be born into. Its just that at some point in life people decide they aren't math people or aren't computer people and give up on any effort to develop the skill before they've tried. For me the biggest source of hesitation has always been time and money. I hate blowing 100 bucks on a night out just for a taxi ride and a couple drinks. I hate listening to some bullshit story about a funny thing some girl's cat did the other day, sometimes it feels like they all talk about the same shit. I find that if I don't put outings on my calendar and allot a portion of my budget to going out then I just wont do it. Once I'm committed to an outing and have the funds set aside it gives motivation to try and make the most of it.