Reproduction and Regression to The Mean
Pragmatically, I like the advice Roosh offered. As I get older I learn that there are a lot of things better left UNSAID, especially negative things when one feels vengeful or paranoid.
When you are dealing with creating a human being who will likely live 80-90 years, the consequences of one's actions are a lot different than the temporary relationships one has in high school, college etc.
So the glorification of being "up front" and "giving them a piece of your mind" is sometimes misplaced in these situations.
It sounds trite, but many times:
Once you say it, you can't unsay it.
If you say something negative and later apologize, many times that is WAY worse than never saying the negative thing.
I advocate being conciliatory and positive while protecting your self-interest.
Someone started a thread which discussed the USA's agreements with some other countries to enforce each other's child support orders.
http://www.rooshvforum.network/thread-7500-p...#pid107960
One big thing is I think sometimes MOST people are "accidents" , but people make the best of it because you are creating a consciousness -- it's like someone you're having a party and sent an invitation to someone you didn't know because you got mixed up.
So this stranger shows up at your party, whether he's wanted or not is ambiguous, but he is innocent of any wrongdoing, and he DID get an invitation.
So out of basic compassion, you might choose to treat the new guest kindly.
From many stories, MOST people are created by "accident", or at least many.
My father let it slip once when I was a teen that I was an "accident" and my mother shushed him, but I could easily understand it, especially now.
They married after earlier, unhappy marriages ( my father's first wife was a bitch, my mother's first husband was nice but died in an accident) . They were about 36 when I was born, and each had two children from the earlier marriages.
So it was quite understandable that they hadn't planned me, but they were exceedingly kind to me. And not mentioning that I was an accident was a way of being polite.
REGRESSION TO THE MEAN
I've written elsewhere about having kids and regression to the mean. If you have something exceptional about your, your kids will generally tend to be more "normal" or average. Picasso was a genius, his daughter a good jewelry designed but nothing like her father.
I think it is a symptom of the mania for upward mobility in America ( a good and bad thing ) that your kid is supposed to surpass your, or at LEAST achieve at your professional level.
But unless your family line progressed to the point that someone becomes, IDK, POTUS or an Academy Award winner, when does it end?
There are a lot of people who want those top 500 slots available every year.
I've accepted that id I have kids they probably won't have my overall level of talent. That is normal, not a tragedy, if you understand statistics and genetics.
Pragmatically, I like the advice Roosh offered. As I get older I learn that there are a lot of things better left UNSAID, especially negative things when one feels vengeful or paranoid.
When you are dealing with creating a human being who will likely live 80-90 years, the consequences of one's actions are a lot different than the temporary relationships one has in high school, college etc.
So the glorification of being "up front" and "giving them a piece of your mind" is sometimes misplaced in these situations.
It sounds trite, but many times:
Once you say it, you can't unsay it.
If you say something negative and later apologize, many times that is WAY worse than never saying the negative thing.
I advocate being conciliatory and positive while protecting your self-interest.
Someone started a thread which discussed the USA's agreements with some other countries to enforce each other's child support orders.
http://www.rooshvforum.network/thread-7500-p...#pid107960
One big thing is I think sometimes MOST people are "accidents" , but people make the best of it because you are creating a consciousness -- it's like someone you're having a party and sent an invitation to someone you didn't know because you got mixed up.
So this stranger shows up at your party, whether he's wanted or not is ambiguous, but he is innocent of any wrongdoing, and he DID get an invitation.
So out of basic compassion, you might choose to treat the new guest kindly.
From many stories, MOST people are created by "accident", or at least many.
My father let it slip once when I was a teen that I was an "accident" and my mother shushed him, but I could easily understand it, especially now.
They married after earlier, unhappy marriages ( my father's first wife was a bitch, my mother's first husband was nice but died in an accident) . They were about 36 when I was born, and each had two children from the earlier marriages.
So it was quite understandable that they hadn't planned me, but they were exceedingly kind to me. And not mentioning that I was an accident was a way of being polite.
REGRESSION TO THE MEAN
I've written elsewhere about having kids and regression to the mean. If you have something exceptional about your, your kids will generally tend to be more "normal" or average. Picasso was a genius, his daughter a good jewelry designed but nothing like her father.
I think it is a symptom of the mania for upward mobility in America ( a good and bad thing ) that your kid is supposed to surpass your, or at LEAST achieve at your professional level.
But unless your family line progressed to the point that someone becomes, IDK, POTUS or an Academy Award winner, when does it end?
There are a lot of people who want those top 500 slots available every year.
I've accepted that id I have kids they probably won't have my overall level of talent. That is normal, not a tragedy, if you understand statistics and genetics.