I had met Brigit on OkCupid. She was a solid 7. I was surprised she returned my message, and actually agreed to meet up with me. Her profile was interesting, and she seemed like someone I would actually enjoy spending time with. She had quite a sense of humor.

Before meeting in person, we exchanged witty text banter all week. The conversation flowed very naturally. I actually liked this girl - she was genuinely pretty funny. We'd sent each other pictures of random stuff, jokes, and even news articles. She had read some of my blog posts and thought they were interesting.

As I'm pulling into the restaurant where we're finally supposed to meet in person, I missed my turn. I text her:

"Hey, I'm running a few minutes late. Missed my turn."
"Oh yeah? How did that happen?
"A Journey song came on and I was sort of jamming out..."
"I'll accept that excuse!"

When I got to the restaurant and saw her, I was pleasantly surprised. She looked just as good in her profile picture in real life. Petite and cute. Big blue eyes. I was into her immediately. We instantly hit it off in person:

"So you missed your turn because Journey came on?"
"Oh c'mon, where else other than in my car can I just belt out 'Don't Stop Believing'? You gotta take advantage of that sort of thing, you know?"
"So... you wore a suit on a first date? Trying to impress me?"
"Well, I was going to wear my work uniform, but McDonalds doesn't like it when I do that."

We were on my turf - I was friends with the owner of the restaurant, and he took great care of us. Made sure to bring out all kinds of crazy "off menu" dishes, and joked about the "importance of Mr. Hank Moody, Esquire."

Most of the night we laughed, made fun of each other, chatted it up with the owner, and talked about our mutual interests. Turns out we had a lot in common, and she was even debating law school. I talked about the ups and the downs of being a lawyer. She told me about how she's bored in her current job working in a non-profit, and asked me about lawyer stories.

I asked her about stuff in her OkCupid profile, and to tell me about some of the most awkward dates she'd ever been on. I told her that her pictures of Egypt looked cool, and asked about her travels. I'd practically memorized her profile.

As the night went on, I genuinely enjoyed spending an evening with this girl, and it felt like we had a lot in common and a connection.

When dinner was over, I picked up the tab. Then I looked at her and said "We should do this again sometime." She responded "definitely." I was giddy from ear to ear - finally met a girl I had a connection with. In my head I could see visions of having a girlfriend - someone to bring to my lawyer events or stay inside and watch Netflix with. Finally, the days of being single would be over.

That night I sent her a text - "Hey. Glad we finally met in person. I had a great time last night."

No response.

I waited a few days and sent her another text - a link to something we had talked about on our date. I began to get nervous. We got along so well. What could I have possible done better? What did I fuck up?

No response.

I texted her one more time: "Hey. Haven't heard from you. Is everything okay? That beer festival is coming up this weekend, and I suppose I could be seen in public with you again. Maybe." We had talked about this one craft beer fest that we both go to each year.

On Friday, she finally texts back: "Hey Hank. I really liked hanging out with you. But I don't think that we're a very good fit. I wish you the best of luck with everything, and your writing. Take care."
--
See post below this. The point of this story is to show how what you think is a "good" date actually generated no attraction whatsoever. This date happened about 2 years ago.

In case I have to spell it out, the point of this story is that having a "connection" and a good time with a girl doesn't necessarily translate into physical attraction. More often that not, it doesn't.

I've had dates where I show up, have a quick drink, and seem disinterested, only to get a text message the next day like "Hey, you're interesting, I'd like to hang out again."

Just because you two had a "good time" or it was a "good date" doesn't mean she's attracted to you.

Quote: (12-29-2015 05:13 PM)HankMoody Wrote:  

In case I have to spell it out, the point of this story is that having a "connection" and a good time with a girl doesn't necessarily translate into physical attraction. More often that not, it doesn't.

I've had dates where I show up, have a quick drink, and seem disinterested, only to get a text message the next day like "Hey, you're interesting, I'd like to hang out again."

Just because you two had a "good time" or it was a "good date" doesn't mean she's attracted to you.

I'd even argue that the better the date seems "on paper" the less likely you are to see her again.

-Dinner
-Pedestal
-Focusing so much on her profile and asking about it
-Giving everything away on the first date
-Putting the cart before the horse with fantasies
-One date at a time
-Setting up the second date already
-The goodnight, I had fun text, too early

I love these exercises and it's an absolutely great point that, no matter what, shit can be going well, but you can catch a bitch at the wrong time and she isn't vibing.

Are you looking for advice or just venting? I couldn't tell. If advice...

Seems like you didn't really turn her on during the date. Nearly everyone on here preaches drinks over dinner. Did you sit next to her? Did your hands continually touch her throughout the evening? Did you try to kiss her? Did you invite her back to your place? Was she drunk? Were you drunk? Did you ever look at her like you wanted to fuck her right then and there?

Not being a dick, but your writing comes across like you really value "witty" banter and shit. Some chicks like a good chat, but most just want a man that can fuck her silly (and protect her). After you give her a few giggles - you should be escalating hard.

...If you didn't want advice - then my bad.

Quote: (12-29-2015 05:13 PM)HankMoody Wrote:  

In case I have to spell it out, the point of this story is that having a "connection" and a good time with a girl doesn't necessarily translate into physical attraction. More often that not, it doesn't.

I've had dates where I show up, have a quick drink, and seem disinterested, only to get a text message the next day like "Hey, you're interesting, I'd like to hang out again."

Just because you two had a "good time" or it was a "good date" doesn't mean she's attracted to you.

Saw this after I posted. These scenarios are fun to think about.

"Familiarity breeds contempt"

In a very real way, I think, the counter intuitive "phenomenon" you're describing is attributable to a tangent /corollary of that old proverb. I think what happens is the real life person doesn't compare and can't compete with the abstractly imagined tingle-inducing persona the chick has in her head and so they conclude: "no connection".

That's why the "less is more" approach so often works

Where was the escalation?

Mailing back and forth being witty like her gay bff would do? There was a time when I would mail frequently and thoughtfully. Make em laugh just as you said. I mailed myself into the friendzone in their heads, vs when I mail logistics only with a reminder ping the day before or day of.

Yeah read over it a second time, list what sort of physicality the two if you had. Friendzoned yourself there from the get-go.

Quote: (12-29-2015 05:09 PM)HankMoody Wrote:  

I had met Brigit on OkCupid. She was a solid 7. I was surprised she returned my message, and actually agreed to meet up with me. Her profile was interesting, and she seemed like someone I would actually enjoy spending time with. She had quite a sense of humor.

Before meeting in person, we exchanged witty text banter all week. The conversation flowed very naturally. I actually liked this girl - she was genuinely pretty funny. We'd sent each other pictures of random stuff, jokes, and even news articles. She had read some of my blog posts and thought they were interesting.

As I'm pulling into the restaurant where we're finally supposed to meet in person, I missed my turn. I text her:

"Hey, I'm running a few minutes late. Missed my turn."
"Oh yeah? How did that happen?
"A Journey song came on and I was sort of jamming out..."
"I'll accept that excuse!"

When I got to the restaurant and saw her, I was pleasantly surprised. She looked just as good in her profile picture in real life. Petite and cute. Big blue eyes. I was into her immediately. We instantly hit it off in person:

"So you missed your turn because Journey came on?"
"Oh c'mon, where else other than in my car can I just belt out 'Don't Stop Believing'? You gotta take advantage of that sort of thing, you know?"
"So... you wore a suit on a first date? Trying to impress me?"
"Well, I was going to wear my work uniform, but McDonalds doesn't like it when I do that."

We were on my turf - I was friends with the owner of the restaurant, and he took great care of us. Made sure to bring out all kinds of crazy "off menu" dishes, and joked about the "importance of Mr. Hank Moody, Esquire."

Most of the night we laughed, made fun of each other, chatted it up with the owner, and talked about our mutual interests. Turns out we had a lot in common, and she was even debating law school. I talked about the ups and the downs of being a lawyer. She told me about how she's bored in her current job working in a non-profit, and asked me about lawyer stories.

I asked her about stuff in her OkCupid profile, and to tell me about some of the most awkward dates she'd ever been on. I told her that her pictures of Egypt looked cool, and asked about her travels. I'd practically memorized her profile.

As the night went on, I genuinely enjoyed spending an evening with this girl, and it felt like we had a lot in common and a connection.

When dinner was over, I picked up the tab. Then I looked at her and said "We should do this again sometime." She responded "definitely." I was giddy from ear to ear - finally met a girl I had a connection with. In my head I could see visions of having a girlfriend - someone to bring to my lawyer events or stay inside and watch Netflix with. Finally, the days of being single would be over.

That night I sent her a text - "Hey. Glad we finally met in person. I had a great time last night."

No response.

I waited a few days and sent her another text - a link to something we had talked about on our date. I began to get nervous. We got along so well. What could I have possible done better? What did I fuck up?

No response.

I texted her one more time: "Hey. Haven't heard from you. Is everything okay? That beer festival is coming up this weekend, and I suppose I could be seen in public with you again. Maybe." We had talked about this one craft beer fest that we both go to each year.

On Friday, she finally texts back: "Hey Hank. I really liked hanging out with you. But I don't think that we're a very good fit. I wish you the best of luck with everything, and your writing. Take care."
--
See post below this. The point of this story is to show how what you think is a "good" date actually generated no attraction whatsoever. This date happened about 2 years ago.

Great story, Hank. When reading, I kept thinking: "Gentlemanly Old School Style". These days you get executed for it, when just a few years back you would have gotten rewarded. Bitches don't want a friend these days - they want a myterious dangerman.

"Is everything okay?" is a line reserved exclusively for females, based on motherly protective worry grounds, not a man in demand who could not give a flying fuck if one of the lined-up groupies has been hit by a bus and died a messy death in the street.

I see your very human deep longing for a "connection" with another human being, a female, to avoid the emptiness that otherwise rules the interaction. These bitches see that as a weakness and neediness, and the last thing they consequently want is Hank inside them. You self-friendzone. Romantic suicide.

Also unless you are 20+ minutes late, there is no point excusing/apologizing. Again, they interpret this not as what you are, namely a man with standards, but as utter, anti-seductive weakness. You are a busy man, and chicks on standby everywhere, waiting their turn is the gina tingling situation they want.

I stopped telling new chicks what I really do. These days my fav story is that I am a surgeon. I make 2-3 comments about how demanding and intense it is, and then completely shut down the topic by saying that I don't want to talk about work anymore, full stop.
Drives them nuts.

The ones that work out get told what I really do later much later. You never get penalized for it, but rather they feel honored for having been let into the know, and you get big respect for being the obviously cunning guy.

I feel you Hank. This sounds really familiar and got me thinking about my recent fuckup.

I sincerely felt a deep connection with this girl and honestly, it did really bother me for about 1.5 weeks and I felt shit about it, even when I think about it right now. Call it oneitis or whatever, she was the first girl since my ex who gave me this feeling.

Dinner dates? Wearing a suit? Texting back and forth endlessly before the date? Texting the same night that you had a good time? Yikes!

None of this is gonna fly very well with OKC girls. Less is definitely more, and never go to a place like a restaurant where physical escalation isn't possible. Over the summer I would take them to a coffee shop by a park. During the winter it's always a bar.

Throw 'em a froyo or a beer out of the trunk of your car. If they're not giving you heavy signs of interest (touching) within the first hour or so then you're likely DOA, bail!

In my experience that's really the only way to make any progress with online girls. They're looking for this "connection", but they want to know it's with a guy who puts them last of his list of priorities (at least initially.)

Modern relationships - whomever is most disinterested, wins. I think the reason they call it "game" is because while you think you're building some sort of connection, that's what young women who do online dating think of it. It's a fun game. If you're looking for someone to build a real connection based on familiarity with, your best bet is going to be social circle.

Quote:Quote:

"Hey Hank. I really liked hanging out with you. But I don't think that we're a very good fit. I wish you the best of luck with everything, and your writing. Take care."

She's sent this line to a hundred guys before you, and will likely send it to a hundred more. Just change the name. So don't feel bad. There's a good chance she's still on OKC two years later, looking for her soulmate...once girls get in, they can't wean themselves off the drug. I wonder if these girls ever think about all the guys they went on dates with and then ghosted on, if they ever think about the way they built their hopes up only to knock them down. I'd guess maybe they felt bad once or twice initially, but the routine and process of it jaded them over time, and they don't anymore. If you can get humans to shove other humans into gas chambers, I suppose one can rationalize just about anything.

Not to go to "deep", but the Polish philosopher/sociologist Zygmunt Bauman was way ahead of the curve on this one and saw the writing on the wall with respect to the effects information technology would have on human relationships:

http://www.amazon.com/Liquid-Love-Frailt...0745624898

One could apply similar reasoning to what he outlines in the book towards the rise of text messaging. Trying to maximize gain while minimizing "externalities" - extract the most out of others while avoiding the consequences of building lasting relationships through distancing. Consequences are icky.

I always laugh my head off when I see some 38 year old spinster profile saying "What ever happened to romance?"

Lady, because you folks killed it. It's the way you wanted it.

Quote: (12-29-2015 06:46 PM)OneEyedMonk Wrote:  

I stopped telling new chicks what I really do. These days my fav story is that I am a surgeon. I make 2-3 comments about how demanding and intense it is, and then completely shut down the topic by saying that I don't want to talk about work anymore, full stop.
Drives them nuts.

Haha, nice. I have a very dry humor. So much so that unless someone has the same humor, most people don't see through it. And I've found that the majority, especially women, will believe any damn thing you say with a serious face.

So, when I get to Colombia next week, I'm going to tell all the girls I work for Donald Trump. I don't know if they even know who he is, but they'll fucking Google his ass for sure if I say, "He's a billionaire running for president, and I'm burnt out and decided to come to Colombia to rest." With my straight way of looking serious while being completely outlandish, yeah, they'll believe it.

And one day if they find out I was full of shit, I'll just say, "What? I was just joking, Chica. Never met the man."

Thanks for sharing Hank. This is also how I used to operate. I haven't changed too much, but I have put some changes in on what I have learned the hard way.

The thing is, no matter what game you have or put in, or how you play it, it really does come down to how much she likes your look and feel, and where she is at with her preferences.

Game helps, but you can game the best, if she's just not into you, then you are shit out of luck.

So thats why its important to not get stuck on one, and keep the numbers moving.

Good read, but no kiss at the end of the date? That'd be a huge red flag no matter how everything else went. In my experience usually means either not feeling you or already seeing someone else and you are a second option. Or third option.

Some morals of the story...

- Having a "good time" with a female doesn't mean she's attracted to you. Quite the contrary.
- Females are not looking to "meet their best friend". They might say they are, but they're not.
- Showing any sort of emotion after a date is fail. Do not ever text "I had a great time tonight." If they don't text you after, chances are you're DOA.
- First date dinners are a waste of time and money. Only take girls you've already banged out to dinner, and mostly because you feel like eating dinner.
- Do not text back and forth prior to the date, or really ever. This applies in relationships, too. If you're texting her all day, you're her gay bestie.
- One date at a time. After, she's supposed to be sitting at home wondering if you had a good time - not the other way around.
- If you go on dates hoping to meet your girlfriend, chances are you're going to be single for awhile.

I would have been better off not reading this girls' profile, taking her to a bar near my house, and trying to bring her home. Instead, I tried to establish a meaningful and genuine connection with another person.

If you're going out and seeking a "connection", chances are you're going to be sleeping alone.

Women are looking to meet someone who is their social better, not their equal. Someone who is cool and mysterious, that they don't understand. While all that witty banter might make it seem seem like they're having fun, it's actually killing the attraction.

A chick not vibing on the first date (despite your perception to the contrary) and telling you as much, I can actually deal with and accept.

It's when you bang them out well (after a great first date) and they go ghost; that's completely perplexing to me.

For us guys, a ONS can usually boil down to one mitigating fact regarding not continuing beyond that - the chick simply was not hot enough to warrant further investment in.

For a chick to cut it off after one night, it can boil down to a myriad of things, of which it is sometimes impossible to ever know the true reason.

Quote: (12-29-2015 09:15 PM)BrewDog Wrote:  

Quote: (12-29-2015 06:46 PM)OneEyedMonk Wrote:  

I stopped telling new chicks what I really do. These days my fav story is that I am a surgeon. I make 2-3 comments about how demanding and intense it is, and then completely shut down the topic by saying that I don't want to talk about work anymore, full stop.
Drives them nuts.

Haha, nice. I have a very dry humor. So much so that unless someone has the same humor, most people don't see through it. And I've found that the majority, especially women, will believe any damn thing you say with a serious face.

So, when I get to Colombia next week, I'm going to tell all the girls I work for Donald Trump. I don't know if they even know who he is, but they'll fucking Google his ass for sure if I say, "He's a billionaire running for president, and I'm burnt out and decided to come to Colombia to rest." With my straight way of looking serious while being completely outlandish, yeah, they'll believe it.

And one day if they find out I was full of shit, I'll just say, "What? I was just joking, Chica. Never met the man."

Remember, gents, that all the questioning has two main purposes:
1. guesstimate the size of your wallet
2. identify hoist points in your personality to latch on, in order to manipulate and control you

Never fall into her frame. Rather, turn it in to a parody. All with a perfectly straight face. Then choose a point in time when you tell her that you have been "just joking" - if ever. She will look stupid, the message of course being that she is your little plaything, for your wicked entertainment, and you Mr Superior.

Experience has taught me that orphan/adoption stories work really well when you are being interviewed as to where from, etc. I once told a girl that I am an orphan and was adopted by a childless Chinese couple in China (mind you, I am white heh ), growing up in Shanghai. After 3 questions I brushed further questions away with the usual "I don't like to talk too much about my family", but the girl was so fascinated that she just could not let go, like a pitbul asking more and more. Hamster wheel was it overdrive. That's how you create mystery they crave so much...and before you know they try to crack the mystery with spread legs.

Needless to say, I never ever in my life dished up such utter BS to men.

Quote: (12-30-2015 03:54 AM)Windom Earle Wrote:  

A chick not vibing on the first date (despite your perception to the contrary) and telling you as much, I can actually deal with and accept.

It's when you bang them out well (after a great first date) and they go ghost; that's completely perplexing to me.

For us guys, a ONS can usually boil down to one mitigating fact regarding not continuing beyond that - the chick simply was not hot enough to warrant further investment in.

For a chick to cut it off after one night, it can boil down to a myriad of things, of which it is sometimes impossible to ever know the true reason.

I have to agree with this point. Just had a similar situation, which totally perplexed me.

Meet up at the bar, changed to my apartment after an hour and cooked dinner together. Finished eating and watched a movie on my bed, followed by the usual escalation, which led to sex.

Good sex. She followed my orders. When I wanted that she blows me she did it.

Overall, it was a good date, good conversations and good sex.

But afterwards, she went silence more or less. When I tried to invite her to dinner at my place a second time, she was like: "I don't do that kind of dates".

I could only reply with "really?". Which girl did I bring from the bar to my apartment, cooked risotto and fucked for good a few days ago?

It doesn't upset me. But that kind of behavior is surprising.

At the end, girls have so many options, they couldn't care less about a guy. If there is just a minor point they don't like, they move on.

As other posters have pointed out, it is a game for them. So the only thing we can do is to join the game (as we all did on RVF).

Ray

Quote: (12-29-2015 05:13 PM)HankMoody Wrote:  

I've had dates where I show up, have a quick drink, and seem disinterested, only to get a text message the next day like "Hey, you're interesting, I'd like to hang out again."

This is a good point.

Menace convinced me to date my first FOB and of course on date one, the EE girl seemed disinterested and cold. That all changed very quickly once I got her into a more private place.

Quote: (12-30-2015 06:57 AM)Ray Carlton Wrote:  

Quote: (12-30-2015 03:54 AM)Windom Earle Wrote:  

A chick not vibing on the first date (despite your perception to the contrary) and telling you as much, I can actually deal with and accept.

It's when you bang them out well (after a great first date) and they go ghost; that's completely perplexing to me.

For us guys, a ONS can usually boil down to one mitigating fact regarding not continuing beyond that - the chick simply was not hot enough to warrant further investment in.

For a chick to cut it off after one night, it can boil down to a myriad of things, of which it is sometimes impossible to ever know the true reason.

I have to agree with this point. Just had a similar situation, which totally perplexed me.

Meet up at the bar, changed to my apartment after an hour and cooked dinner together. Finished eating and watched a movie on my bed, followed by the usual escalation, which led to sex.

Good sex. She followed my orders. When I wanted that she blows me she did it.

Overall, it was a good date, good conversations and good sex.

But afterwards, she went silence more or less. When I tried to invite her to dinner at my place a second time, she was like: "I don't do that kind of dates".

I could only reply with "really?". Which girl did I bring from the bar to my apartment, cooked risotto and fucked for good a few days ago?

It doesn't upset me. But that kind of behavior is surprising.

At the end, girls have so many options, they couldn't care less about a guy. If there is just a minor point they don't like, they move on.

As other posters have pointed out, it is a game for them. So the only thing we can do is to join the game (as we all did on RVF).

Ray

Ray, I think you need to tread lightly on second dates (despite the depravity of the first), lest she think that you think she's a slut.

Meet somewhere public first (again), and it shouldn't take much comfort to transition back to your place.

Give her the impression that you think she's prim and proper, even if she's far from it.

Quote: (12-30-2015 05:07 AM)OneEyedMonk Wrote:  

Experience has taught me that orphan/adoption stories work really well when you are being interviewed as to where from, etc. I once told a girl that I am an orphan and was adopted by a childless Chinese couple in China (mind you, I am white heh ), growing up in Shanghai. After 3 questions I brushed further questions away with the usual "I don't like to talk too much about my family", but the girl was so fascinated that she just could not let go, like a pitbul asking more and more. Hamster wheel was it overdrive. That's how you create mystery they crave so much...and before you know they try to crack the mystery with spread legs.

Needless to say, I never ever in my life dished up such utter BS to men.

I like the orphan angle. Love it actually. I'm stealing this and using it as my own. I know, it's unoriginal to steal some other guy's jedi mindtricks, but hey... it's too good not to use. I owe you a beer.

Quote: (12-30-2015 07:37 AM)Windom Earle Wrote:  

Ray, I think you need to tread lightly on second dates (despite the depravity of the first), lest she think that you think she's a slut.

Meet somewhere public first (again), and it shouldn't take much comfort to transition back to your place.

Give her the impression that you think she's prim and proper, even if she's far from it.

Yes, that's a good point.

Instead of going to direct, I should play a similar routine as for the first date.

I guess I am getting too lazy sometimes.

Thanks
Ray

What Hank has just described is a recently new phenomenon that has sprung up in the past few years coinciding with the proliferation of smart phones and social media. It is often baffling to recently new students of game, especially those who are using internet dating and street game as avenues to meet women - and to, more generally, recently single men who are like Rip Van Winkle, waking up from a long-term relationship to an entirely new dating arena.

It's baffling because as men we look at things logically - the date went well, she seemed into us, we went for the kiss and got it. Five or ten years ago a second date was all but guaranteed if she laughed at all of your jokes and stuck around for two or three drinks. But in today's dating marketplace, none of that amounts to a hill of beans. Girls treat dates like Christmas, like they're opening up a shiny new present, and if you're not exactly what she was hoping for - hell, even if you ARE exactly what she was hoping for, the excitement of opening that present has waned the second it has been opened. She has the keys to an entire Santa's workshop of new toys the next time she unlocks her smartphone. Of course, it may be as simple as her not being physically attracted to you, but things are usually more nuanced than that especially when it comes to internet dating.

Other variables come into play to complicate things further and to make her never want to see you again: did you escalate too much - or perhaps too little? You may have escalated hard and she was wetter than Niagara, but the next day the logical forebrain kicks in. She now feels cheap. Conversely, perhaps you didn't escalate at all, and thus she rationalises there was no "chemistry".

If you are new to this, you'll learn this lesson quickly: escalate hard. Go for sex as quickly as possible. You'll be amazed at how pliable a lot of these girls are. My own notch count is not something I'm all that interested in inflating, so not only do I not mind, but I'd actually prefer it if I could get to know them over the course of a few dates before jumping into bed with them, but you are unfortunately forced to play the hand you're dealt.

Hank know the enemy and its objective. Society and that freakin iphone in their hand are a force multiplier. Just like the above guys stated before it was man on woman contact now a woman has endless men to mow down with her little keyboard fingers.
I am so glad im not in my 20s now wanting a relationship cause id be fucked by tech.
Think about the mentality of a woman who you have know for months and is fucking you and telling you she loves you. You hear this and you like it because its something you want too. Now she does not have her shit together $$ and you do and are well off which took a lifetime to do.
Your bf and gf and one day your in bed with her and her iphone is blowin up. Now the creature she is shows you something on the phone while your in bed and you see little heart icons on the toolbar.humm whats that you say?? Well thats from all her likes from a dating site she is on. You are a kin to a human life ring to her $$ and she says she loves you bangs you out but is still looking for the alien that does not exist. Once they get on the tech cock a go round its like a drug and hard to put down.

Quote: (12-30-2015 05:07 AM)OneEyedMonk Wrote:  

Quote: (12-29-2015 09:15 PM)BrewDog Wrote:  

Quote: (12-29-2015 06:46 PM)OneEyedMonk Wrote:  

I stopped telling new chicks what I really do. These days my fav story is that I am a surgeon. I make 2-3 comments about how demanding and intense it is, and then completely shut down the topic by saying that I don't want to talk about work anymore, full stop.
Drives them nuts.

Haha, nice. I have a very dry humor. So much so that unless someone has the same humor, most people don't see through it. And I've found that the majority, especially women, will believe any damn thing you say with a serious face.

So, when I get to Colombia next week, I'm going to tell all the girls I work for Donald Trump. I don't know if they even know who he is, but they'll fucking Google his ass for sure if I say, "He's a billionaire running for president, and I'm burnt out and decided to come to Colombia to rest." With my straight way of looking serious while being completely outlandish, yeah, they'll believe it.

And one day if they find out I was full of shit, I'll just say, "What? I was just joking, Chica. Never met the man."

Remember, gents, that all the questioning has two main purposes:
1. guesstimate the size of your wallet
2. identify hoist points in your personality to latch on, in order to manipulate and control you

Never fall into her frame. Rather, turn it in to a parody. All with a perfectly straight face. Then choose a point in time when you tell her that you have been "just joking" - if ever. She will look stupid, the message of course being that she is your little plaything, for your wicked entertainment, and you Mr Superior.

Experience has taught me that orphan/adoption stories work really well when you are being interviewed as to where from, etc. I once told a girl that I am an orphan and was adopted by a childless Chinese couple in China (mind you, I am white heh ), growing up in Shanghai. After 3 questions I brushed further questions away with the usual "I don't like to talk too much about my family", but the girl was so fascinated that she just could not let go, like a pitbul asking more and more. Hamster wheel was it overdrive. That's how you create mystery they crave so much...and before you know they try to crack the mystery with spread legs.

Needless to say, I never ever in my life dished up such utter BS to men.

I love this, the whole orphan thing tugs at their heart strings, adds mystique, and probably gets them wet just thinking about it. And yes, the denying their requests about more personal information is a good strategy instead of trying to come up with more BS, they will guess that you are full of shit.

The more I think about it, the more I like the idea. If you are just looking for sex, this is great, if you are looking for more of a relationship, probably don't want to lie so much.