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Older Guys (40+) - JayJuanGee - 10-03-2014

Quote: (10-03-2014 06:42 PM)reco2100 Wrote:  

Flying back from San Francisco but will be in Tampa next week meeting up with an 18yo, and a 23 Yo...want to get together and chat?

I believe El Mech is asking you to give a little context for your assertion that your working on your "good attitude" will result in better outcomes to overcome issues of aging. Your in your early 50s, and you feel better than you were in your mid-20s. Ok.. You just meditate and think positive thoughts and eat well and exercise or what do you do?

O.k.. you are going to meet up with some young girls in the coming days, and can you provide a little more context how guys are supposed to get from point A to point B in supposedly getting results that you are suggesting to be possible.. such as being able to pick up young girls... in the context of your own experiences.

It doesn't really help us to understand how you arrived at your outcomes if you don't provide some more details.


Older Guys (40+) - el mechanico - 10-03-2014

El mech would like to engage in a bad ass 40 + thread.

This one sucks ass.


Older Guys (40+) - MrXY - 10-03-2014

Yes it does


Older Guys (40+) - reco2100 - 10-04-2014

Quote: (10-03-2014 07:04 PM)JayJuanGee Wrote:  

Quote: (10-03-2014 06:42 PM)reco2100 Wrote:  

Flying back from San Francisco but will be in Tampa next week meeting up with an 18yo, and a 23 Yo...want to get together and chat?

I believe El Mech is asking you to give a little context for your assertion that your working on your "good attitude" will result in better outcomes to overcome issues of aging. Your in your early 50s, and you feel better than you were in your mid-20s. Ok.. You just meditate and think positive thoughts and eat well and exercise or what do you do?

O.k.. you are going to meet up with some young girls in the coming days, and can you provide a little more context how guys are supposed to get from point A to point B in supposedly getting results that you are suggesting to be possible.. such as being able to pick up young girls... in the context of your own experiences.

It doesn't really help us to understand how you arrived at your outcomes if you don't provide some more details.

Well I am not so sure that good attitude is the secret, by itself. There is a lot that goes into good attitude. And I do not have all the answers. All I can tell you is what works for me. Wow this is going to take a lot of words. lol When I was younger I was very unhappy in my life. I mean I was doing a lot things. I had a successful career and started earning money at an early age. I was able to go on different adventures and do fun things, very busy life. But I was not happy.

But I was looking for something better always questioning. If there is one characteristic that I have. It is the ability to question and look at different ways to do things. I was very unsuccessful with women. I was as blue pill as they come. I lived an adventurous prosperous life on the outside and was a complete pussy in my personal relationships and especially with women. I probably married the wrong woman and stayed in the marriage for a long time. The lack of this realization was behind everything I was doing. For a long time. While all this is going on I was not facing up to it. It was just in the background being suppressed. So you can be doing what looks like all the right things on the surface and still not be happy. If I had to guess this led to a general malaise in my life. That led to multiple chronic but not acute health issues. Severe lower back pain that I thought came from a water ski injury. Chronic headaches. Joint pain. Lack of energy.

I read a lot and I have always looked for new ideas. I came across a book called "Healing Back Pain" by Dr. Sarnow. I highly recommend it. What I learned was that my back pain was caused by "tension" in my life (not the realization above that was too deep and would come later) but other issues such as. Troubles at work, dissatisfaction with friends and family etc. When I learned this the back pain went away. Just like magic. I threw away all the doctors medications and back exercises did not need them anymore. Occasionally it comes back but I just look inside and determine what is creating the tension and the physical problems will subside. Hope this helps. Suffering mind leads to suffering body. I have told this to other people and most reject it without thinking about it. They would rather live with the pain. Hang onto it and not make any changes.

That leads me to another realization. I forced myself to be honest about what was wrong and deal with that directly regardless of where that would take me. That is what eventually led me to this site. The Buddha said "the greatest discovery is yourself". I highly recommend his work. All the stuff on this site is just men on a journey of self discovery. Call it inner game, self improvement. Christian McQueen talked about this on one of his podcasts, there are many successful blue pill men out there. And self improvement is a lot more than dress well, good job, exercise and diet, that is the starting point.

I still was very disatified with my social life and women, but that is a much deeper problem. I kept reading there was no one I could talk with about it. I flirted with women in my weak ass way. Had a couple of flings but nothing serious or long term. But not really what I wanted. I also had been meditating off and on for a few years and I got into it more deeply. This is not a small thing.

Meditation is a deeply massively beneficial activity. Probably the most important thing I do. A lot of people think that it is just a way to relieve stress and relaxation. But it is so much more than that. It is the portal to everything into your life. It is the key to true understanding and enlightenment. Good health and feeling happy are only side benefits. But this can be a long a slow process. At least it has been for me. And it is far from over.

I learned about real nutrition. Not the bullshit of popular culture. I was an early adopter of using protein and fats as a key dietary route to good health back in 1997. And how damaging carbs are to every part of your body. Two good books were "Protein Power Plan" and more recently "The Grain Brain" By Dr. Perlmutter, which talks about the effect of carbs on brain health development and just feeling good. I highly recommend this book.

Along the way I found another amazing book "No More Mr. Nice Guy" by Dr. Glover. It talks about many of the concepts from the blue pill to the red pill perspective. But he put it in to a very organized system. Essentially a plan on how to get your life back. And I worked on this for a couple of years. This was the greatest help in getting me started on getting my life back in my marriage. I learned how to assert myself in my marriage and to take charge again. I also learned to lean into the pain in our lives. This took a few years. I was also coming to the realization that I had made a big mistake marrying many years earlier. Along the way I read "Shakelton's Way", a great guide to attitude in times of severe stress and difficulty. And "Way Of The Superior Man" which has been talked about in the manosphere extensively.

The question still comes up on why we do these crazy self destructive things and where they come from. I discovered that much of this comes from some pretty deep stuff. But usually the root that is shame. Check out this Ted Talk by Dr. Brene Brown she explains it very well.

http://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_on_...anguage=en

Shame is the root of many of these problems that all of us deal with. If you can conquer your shame. I believe you are on your way. Look at what she says about courage.

This is a second one since she was one of the most published Ted Talks ever. They had her back for another one. I know, i know, she is a woman. But show me someone else researching this. In particular check out 15:33 in the second video and see what she says about men. Is that the truth? That's all I ask.

http://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_lis...anguage=en

This helped me a lot. But the question is how do you get to this shame and how do you deal with it? How do you kill it, fix it? That led to the next book. "The Power Of Now", many have talked about this but how many have really applied the principles in there? I have. Or at least I am trying. Meditation helps, but the introspection is just as important. The ability to observe ourselves and not judge is a supremely important and at the same time eternally rejected by most people I have talked to about it. But I am living proof it works. He talks about attachment and how this causes suffering in the mind which causes suffering in the body. The buddah said that "attachment is the root of all suffering". Let go of that attachment and suffering will subside. This is an eternal process.

I am far from perfect and have much to work on but I am happier and I believe these are some of the reasons why. There were lots of other books. And other lessons but this gives you a brief idea of my very long journey. There is no quick answer this is a process that can take a lifetime. I am not sure not there yet. I am tired now. I was in airports and planes yesterday for 14 hours. Gonna sleep a little now. And the lawn needs mowing. What about you guys what has worked for you?


Older Guys (40+) - Nomad77 - 10-04-2014

Some good stuff! Who was it that said every great journey begins with one step?


Older Guys (40+) - JayJuanGee - 10-04-2014

Quote: (10-04-2014 12:30 PM)reco2100 Wrote:  

[Clipped.....]

I am far from perfect and have much to work on but I am happier and I believe these are some of the reasons why. There were lots of other books. And other lessons but this gives you a brief idea of my very long journey. There is no quick answer this is a process that can take a lifetime. I am not sure not there yet. I am tired now. I was in airports and planes yesterday for 14 hours. Gonna sleep a little now. And the lawn needs mowing. What about you guys what has worked for you?

I appreciate your fairly lengthy post explaining your general perspective and how you arrived at your various conclusions in your earlier posts.

It seems that you could provide a quantity of further detail upon request, and surely you could provide more of these kinds of details at your own discretion. I am NOT going to ask for further details, at the moment, because to me it seems that you have more than adequately elaborated and responded to some of the gaps that seemed to be present in your earlier posts (I am NOT trying to be critical here, but your earlier posts came off a bit awkward because, as I already mentioned, they contained conclusions that were just kind of hanging out there).

By the way, appreciate your perspective in which you describe reading to have been very important to mold your perspective and experimentation, and that you attempted to apply various principles and/or practices in creating a better you that you acquired through reading.

I hope some guys take your challenge and write a detailed response regarding what has worked for them... well, maybe in the context of the evolution of this thread regarding performance and energy building and/or preservation during our "over the hill" years. At this time, I am NOT going to elaborate on any such challenge because it seems that I have put together quite a few lengthy posts that describe a lot of what I attempt to do in my life.

Just in summary, it seems that my main guiding principles in recent years has been that I tend to attempt to balance diet, sleep and exercise and engage various forms of planning and outlining of goals that I strive to follow through with. I am NOT much of a meditator nor a spiritual person (nor a church goer), and maybe some of my planning and goal setting practices have so far served as forms of meditation and/or spirituality for me that I hope guides me in my attempts to bring balance to my social relations.


Older Guys (40+) - reco2100 - 10-04-2014

Well thanks for the comments. There is a lot more to tell obviously. Feel free to ask. I will tell you what I know.

I ask a lot of questions on the women/gaming side. Lots of work to do there still.


Older Guys (40+) - JayJuanGee - 10-04-2014

Quote: (10-04-2014 04:27 PM)reco2100 Wrote:  

Well thanks for the comments. There is a lot more to tell obviously. Feel free to ask. I will tell you what I know.

I ask a lot of questions on the women/gaming side. Lots of work to do there still.

A great thing about this forum is that we can explore some of these ideas from a guy's perspective without necessarily agreeing with the specific practices or even viewpoints of other guys.

I have actually learned quite a bit about myself through various interactions that I have had through various threads of this forum, and sometimes, I have decided to research into various topics or even experiment upon myself regarding topics that have been explored (or touched upon) in various threads.

In that line, funny that we live these many years (into our 40s, 50s and hopefully beyond), and we still remain a work-in-progress, and have NOT realized some aspects about our earlier selves. Surely, I would prefer to live a long and healthy life, but it seems inevitable that I have begun to ponder my own mortality, especially since my 40s- and probably moreso upon reaching my mid-40s, from an angle that was much different in my earlier years, and it seems that in my earlier years, I even suffered from some seeming misperceptions of immortality (even though deep down inside, I realized that my own immortality was NOT the case).


Older Guys (40+) - Stun - 10-04-2014

Quote: (10-03-2014 08:51 PM)el mechanico Wrote:  

El mech would like to engage in a bad ass 40 + thread.

This one sucks ass.

Start one. I will get in there.


Older Guys (40+) - The Father - 10-08-2014

Quote: (10-04-2014 04:56 PM)Stun Wrote:  

Quote: (10-03-2014 08:51 PM)el mechanico Wrote:  

El mech would like to engage in a bad ass 40 + thread.

This one sucks ass.

Start one. I will get in there.

Me too. I mean, uh, when I turn 40. Yeah, that's it... [Image: confused.gif]


Older Guys (40+) - YossariansRight - 10-08-2014

With age and wisdom, I'm in tune with Steve McQueen: "I live my life for myself and answer to nobody."


Older Guys (40+) - tdawg - 10-08-2014

I'm 55 and now totally in the zone.

I look and feel better than I did at 45. Some girl the other day told me she thought I was 37. Another said 33.

Tomorrow I am going to have sex for five hours straight.

Kickin' ass and takin' no prisoners


Older Guys (40+) - JayJuanGee - 10-09-2014

Quote: (10-08-2014 09:28 PM)tdawg Wrote:  

I'm 55 and now totally in the zone.

I look and feel better than I did at 45. Some girl the other day told me she thought I was 37. Another said 33.

Tomorrow I am going to have sex for five hours straight.

Kickin' ass and takin' no prisoners


So what's your secret to this fountain of youth that you seem to be experiencing? Is it transmutable?


Older Guys (40+) - tdawg - 10-09-2014

Quote: (10-09-2014 12:40 AM)JayJuanGee Wrote:  

So what's your secret to this fountain of youth that you seem to be experiencing? Is it transmutable?

My program: real foods diet, exercise, stretching, walking, prayer, meditation, work, love, service, gratitude, sex, making stuff.

Also, most importantly, 7 hours of sleep, rise at sunrise. When I started sleeping in a room with a sunrise view is when this all started.

Sleep is a wonder drug.


Older Guys (40+) - Nomad77 - 10-09-2014

I would add one thing: change your internal age to a younger age. For me, my internal age is 28. I am always 28. When you think of yourself at certain way this translates to external changes you cannot consciously create.


Older Guys (40+) - reco2100 - 10-09-2014

I think these are some really good points. I know for myself that sleep is essential. And when you have good peace of mind you will sleep better. I know many people who cannot sleep or have sleep problems. Almost always it is some type of unresolved conflict going on and they are hearing what the Buddhists call the "chattering monkeys" in their head that do not stop. Of course the key to this once again is meditation and that journey in knowing yourself.

I agree also with the internal age. That state of mind to think of yourself as this certain age is critical. Sometimes I say my chronological age and it just sounds weird to me. It is not part of my reality. Just like I hear so many experts on this forum talk about fear of failure with women is not part of their reality.

Now I just have to get that 2nd one worked out. lol


Older Guys (40+) - horn - 10-09-2014

How old would you be if you didn't know how old you were?


Older Guys (40+) - el mechanico - 10-09-2014

I'm referring to my employees as "Nizzels" they don't like it.

You guys want to do this thread the right way or what?


Older Guys (40+) - JayJuanGee - 10-09-2014

Quote: (10-09-2014 06:31 PM)horn Wrote:  

How old would you be if you didn't know how old you were?


I don't really disagree with the concept of mind over matter... "if you don't mind, it doesn't matter;" however, sometimes it seems that there is a need to be in touch with reality and to embrace the reality of the current physical state of affairs. In recent months, I have kind of gotten over attempts to represent myself to others as being in my early 40s, when in fact I am in my late 40s. Frequently, I will just change the subject and NOT respond to the specific question.. that way I can kind of present myself in whatever tone I feel appropriate and sort of roll with the punches.. so to speak.

I am NOT sure about whether my acknowledgement of my age, being in my late 40s, will make me older or feel older because I feel how I feel, and I attempt to maximize energy and good feelings, but sometimes it just is NOT there.

Sometimes, when I observe some younger persons (either men or women) in the gym or on the dance floor or engaged in some other physical activities, I will think to myself...

To self: "Gosh, I used to be able to do those kinds of things, and I just cannot do those things anymore.. Surely, I would like to be able to do those things, but it is just out of my current abilities and I am NOT going to work at attempting to get the point that I can do those things."

I know that the above is kind of a long train of thought; however, I am currently of the belief that I want to work within the reality of what is feasible and reasonable for me... my energy and my physicality and sometimes even considering whether I look like a dork when I am engaged in some activities... he he he...

That reminds me a little bit of a recent dance move that I have been attempting... it is kind of a bouncing move with the girl.. and it comes to play at certain times of dance and I have been playing around with it... I find it fun and I find it funny, but the move works differently with different girls and sometimes I employ it too prematurely because I am reading the situation a little incorrectly.


Surely, there are times in which I do attempt to do some physical exertion things that are a bit beyond my current capabilities or may even fit within the perception of a younger age group, but in reality, the physical and the energy does deteriorate over the years. In reality, when I look in the mirror, I do NOT see as much hair and I do NOT see as much muscle mass, as was present 5 years ago, 10 years ago, or 15 years ago. Also, when I run 5 miles, I take longer to recover than I did in those earlier times. When I go to the gym and I do a set on the bench presses, it takes me longer to recover than it took in those earlier times.

So, I can think all of these positive and youthful thoughts, but the reality sometimes will bite me in the balls and/or other parts.


Older Guys (40+) - JayJuanGee - 10-09-2014

Quote: (10-09-2014 06:41 PM)el mechanico Wrote:  

I'm referring to my employees as "Nizzels" they don't like it.

You guys want to do this thread the right way or what?

Who knows about calling employes "Nizzles" - seems as if it could bite you in the balls at some point... but if it seems to work for you, then so be it.

Regarding doing this thread "right", you may get some agreement; however, you may get a few arguments upon implementation, too. For the moment, I will reserve taking any sides..... [Image: smile.gif] [Image: confused.gif]


Older Guys (40+) - ColSpanker - 10-09-2014

I'm 56 and routinely drop the hammer on guys half my age at the local martial arts practice I attend. But I'm not stupid: I know that if I let what little skill I have slip and they continue to improve, the situation will quickly reverse itself. I've seen it happen plenty of times. Last year's wet-nosed punk with no power or accuracy comes back in a few years after he's gotten serious and kicks my ass.


Older Guys (40+) - JayJuanGee - 10-09-2014

Quote: (10-09-2014 07:46 PM)ColSpanker Wrote:  

I'm 56 and routinely drop the hammer on guys half my age at the local martial arts practice I attend. But I'm not stupid: I know that if I let what little skill I have slip and they continue to improve, the situation will quickly reverse itself. I've seen it happen plenty of times. Last year's wet-nosed punk with no power or accuracy comes back in a few years after he's gotten serious and kicks my ass.

That's kind of what I am talking about, too. I definitely can throw down with a lot of younger guys in a variety of kinds of scenarios, and sometimes I laugh to myself about the lack of energy, skills or power of the younger guys; however, as you suggested, personally, I would NOT want to rub some of the seeming incompetence (or inabilities) in their face because I do NOT want to get in over my head - whether now or in the future, and the reality of the matter is that my physical power, technique and energy is only going to go down (even if I engage in various preventative, building and maintenance measures).


Older Guys (40+) - reco2100 - 10-10-2014

I was with my 18 year old two days ago in the hotel room after sex. And she decided she wanted to wrestle. She is pretty thick and an athlete competitive cheerleader. Pretty strong girl. I was still able to hold both her wrists with one hand and overcome her even though I was spent from the second nutt. But it was a surprise to her and me both on how much my stamina held up.

Just finished with a 23 year old Cubana down in Miami. Fucking awesome. One of the best kissers of my life. This girl is super sweet. But Cubans can be real crazy. Have to keep an eye on her. I am having a really good week. She gave me a ton of LMR but I did the strawberry game with her and just like Roosh said it is a good predictor and I kept plowing through. (She had a low fence and ate a lot of strawberries. )She had told me earlier in the night that she did not want to jump into bed right away and to take it slow. That was an hour before I fucked her.

Time from first meet to fuck was four hours fifteen minutes. You guys are so right. Five years ago I would have believed her and taken her home.

Life is good.


Older Guys (40+) - Captain Ahab - 10-10-2014

This has been one of my favorite threads I've read in a while.

I'm 31, feel 24-25, look 25-28. I've taken care of myself over the years and look forward to the years ahead of me, thanks to the testimony of you older gentlemen.

I understand some don't like younger guys talking in this thread, but hey, young people should appreciate wisdom.

Thanks for all the thoughts guys. I'm working on my internal age being 28 for the next ten years.[Image: sleepy.gif]


Older Guys (40+) - reco2100 - 10-10-2014

^^
Right on brother. We all have to be able to learn from each other.

I was listening to one of Christian mcQeens podcasts the other day. He has some good shit up there. And he was saying this exact thing. Everyone has something that they do better than you. And you should learn from it.