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Player's Log / Lounge - Merris - 12-09-2016
Gdamn I hate being cockblocked by work. Can't get to the neighboring towns to meet the chicks I've warmed up over Tinder and Bumble.
Oh well, setting up dates for next week.
Player's Log / Lounge - UlteriorMotive - 12-09-2016
Went into Central London today to grab some threads.
Asian chick 1 sends me a message after seeing a snap chat post I put up saying she works nearby.
Grabbed lunch which she paid for as well as saying shes going to make me some Japanese beef dinner tomorrow at hers, I'm looking forward to the food.
Asian chick 2 (post-virgin) hit me up earlier asking if I can swing by later tonight, I told her I'd be free after the weekend.
She's been dropping hints about us being exclusive, I've been ignoring it.
She tried to tempt me to change my mind by letting me know she has bought a new set of Lingerie.
If AC1 hadn't drained my main vein last night I might have considered it.
A few conversations that look promising going from tinder, unfortunately over Christmas I don't have the time with work and a side project to be hammering out the dates.
Group of hens at work commented on me only liking Asian chicks, I laughed it off. When they asked why I asked them "Can any of you cook?"
I dated a British chick a few years back who managed to burn microwave minute rice.
Player's Log / Lounge - Zanardi - 12-09-2016
Yesterday I realized that most of my friends think that I am a super-duper pickup artist, who can seduce any girl he chooses to. However, I know that I am very far from this status. Not sure how to feel about this situation...
Player's Log / Lounge - kaotic - 12-09-2016
Quote: (12-09-2016 03:02 PM)Zanardi Wrote:
Yesterday I realized that most of my friends think that I am a super-duper pickup artist, who can seduce any girl he chooses to. However, I know that I am very far from this status. Not sure how to feel about this situation...
Own it, keep learning, and keep improving.
The carousel never stops, why should you ?
Player's Log / Lounge - kaotic - 12-09-2016
There's a coworker I work with, he's Trump support, former bodybuilder, still pulls hot ladies (on the side).
He's a good looking dude, albeit a bit short (like 5'6) but still pulls.
I met his GF today, I was kind of shocked, she was sub 6 for sure, a bit chubby, caked up make up and acne on her face. I even feel a tad bit bad writing this.
I assumed his chick would be a banger from the picture he has of her - boy was I wrong.
I'm assuming she's a good woman and super loyal and that's why he's got her on lock, but man was I let down.
He's definitely aware and "red pill" we talk about game all the time, so I'm confident he's doing what he wants, but you never know.
Player's Log / Lounge - redbeard - 12-09-2016
Quote: (12-09-2016 04:58 PM)kaotic Wrote:
There's a coworker I work with, he's Trump support, former bodybuilder, still pulls hot ladies (on the side).
He's a good looking dude, albeit a bit short (like 5'6) but still pulls.
I met his GF today, I was kind of shocked, she was sub 6 for sure, a bit chubby, caked up make up and acne on her face. I even feel a tad bit bad writing this.
I assumed his chick would be a banger from the picture he has of her - boy was I wrong.
I'm assuming she's a good woman and super loyal and that's why he's got her on lock, but man was I let down.
He's definitely aware and "red pill" we talk about game all the time, so I'm confident he's doing what he wants, but you never know.
I crack up when I see guys like this.
Player's Log / Lounge - jselysianeagle - 12-09-2016
Quote: (12-09-2016 05:02 PM)redbeard Wrote:
Quote: (12-09-2016 04:58 PM)kaotic Wrote:
There's a coworker I work with, he's Trump support, former bodybuilder, still pulls hot ladies (on the side).
He's a good looking dude, albeit a bit short (like 5'6) but still pulls.
I met his GF today, I was kind of shocked, she was sub 6 for sure, a bit chubby, caked up make up and acne on her face. I even feel a tad bit bad writing this.
I assumed his chick would be a banger from the picture he has of her - boy was I wrong.
I'm assuming she's a good woman and super loyal and that's why he's got her on lock, but man was I let down.
He's definitely aware and "red pill" we talk about game all the time, so I'm confident he's doing what he wants, but you never know.
I crack up when I see guys like this.
Yeah, it's hard to reconcile the personality these guys portray to the world, with the quality of their GFs...gotta wonder if the braggadocio on the outside is just a mask for some deep seated insecurity.
Player's Log / Lounge - Fightersword - 12-09-2016
Quote: (12-09-2016 04:58 PM)kaotic Wrote:
There's a coworker I work with, he's Trump support, former bodybuilder, still pulls hot ladies (on the side).
He's a good looking dude, albeit a bit short (like 5'6) but still pulls.
I met his GF today, I was kind of shocked, she was sub 6 for sure, a bit chubby, caked up make up and acne on her face. I even feel a tad bit bad writing this.
I assumed his chick would be a banger from the picture he has of her - boy was I wrong.
I'm assuming she's a good woman and super loyal and that's why he's got her on lock, but man was I let down.
He's definitely aware and "red pill" we talk about game all the time, so I'm confident he's doing what he wants, but you never know.
Never understood why men like him date down (for looks). I can't honestly think of a personality so good that I'd want to LTR/marry someone I'd feel embarrassed to show around. I guess some other guys are different, but it's like I'd want a girl I locked down to kind of be a symbol of my successes in life. Yeah sure maybe a girl checks a lot of boxes for personality, but if she's ugly it's still a no go. He might not mind going under his means so much for the girl, but it's something I'd never want to do. Maybe that's just me though.
Player's Log / Lounge - LeoneVolpe - 12-09-2016
^ A couple of things come to mind...
If he met her when she was younger, perhaps she used to be better looking and has since hit the wall, like what happened with Pierce Brosnan's wife. Or, perhaps she was a "prize" based off his level of game when he met her, but he's since gone on to develop tighter game from smashing side bitches and can now command hotter poon.
He may not be physically loyal to his girlfriend, but he's emotionally loyal because she's been with him a lot longer than any of the rest of these hos. A faithless player, ironically, will come to appreciate the value of a woman (even if she isn't the best looking) who remains faithful to him even whilst he runs game elsewhere, precisely because his experiences have shown him how quickly bitches come and go.
She's probably relatively low maintenance, treats him well and gives him a feeling of stability. By cheating, he can have his cake and eat it too. He gets the security a long-term relationship provides with the novelty of occasionally getting some sexier strange on the side.
Player's Log / Lounge - philosophical_recovery - 12-09-2016
Quote: (12-09-2016 10:21 PM)Fightersword Wrote:
Quote: (12-09-2016 04:58 PM)kaotic Wrote:
There's a coworker I work with, he's Trump support, former bodybuilder, still pulls hot ladies (on the side).
He's a good looking dude, albeit a bit short (like 5'6) but still pulls.
I met his GF today, I was kind of shocked, she was sub 6 for sure, a bit chubby, caked up make up and acne on her face. I even feel a tad bit bad writing this.
I assumed his chick would be a banger from the picture he has of her - boy was I wrong.
I'm assuming she's a good woman and super loyal and that's why he's got her on lock, but man was I let down.
He's definitely aware and "red pill" we talk about game all the time, so I'm confident he's doing what he wants, but you never know.
Never understood why men like him date down (for looks). I can't honestly think of a personality so good that I'd want to LTR/marry someone I'd feel embarrassed to show around. I guess some other guys are different, but it's like I'd want a girl I locked down to kind of be a symbol of my successes in life. Yeah sure maybe a girl checks a lot of boxes for personality, but if she's ugly it's still a no go. He might not mind going under his means so much for the girl, but it's something I'd never want to do. Maybe that's just me though.
Maybe he had been playing too long on the wrong side of the hot/crazy line:
Player's Log / Lounge - Spidey - 12-10-2016
Last night at the bar there's two girls in the far corner at a table. I catch a glance or two with them, but remain seated. My plan was to move over to them when I got my next beer, but they beat me to it.
They change tables to one near me, so I immediately sit down with them and say hello. Tell them I want to practice my Spanish and that I want some of their rum.
They open up really easy and everything is going good. Both girls are really attractive so I'm working on both of them. The girl next to me doesn't speak English but her friend does so I'm using her as my translator. Then a third girl joins us.
Two of the girls start making out in front of me, and the girl who doesn't speak English starts hooking up with me. But from here I can't see how to merge everyone together.
The new girls tells me to buy them drinks and I tell her no. I tell her I have beers at my house and I live 5 minutes from here. They don't bite and decide to leave.
The new girl was not really feeling me, but the other two were. I get a feeling that if it remained just me and the two girls I would have had a much more interesting night.
The girl I hooked up with writes her phone number on both of my hands, says we should hang out tomorrow.
Later I go to another bar for a last minute play. Feel good and motivated but its 3:30 at this point.
Talk with a guy I met the other night, see another stunner. We do the eye dance. My friend asks if I want to be introduced and brings the girl over to me.
We chat for a bit, her English is decent and I ask if she has a boyfriend. She says yes and that he is home with their child. I tell her "great, you have the night off". Tell her she should come to my place for a nightcap. She says yes, but she wants to stay out a bit longer.
I'm wasted at this point but this girl is really hot so I try my best to wait it out but eventually I get tired. Ask her if she wants to go and she says no not yet. I tell her I'm out and slip her my number.
Initially she seemed really interested but I guess I fell off somewhere. Not really sure because I was so drunk at that point.
Now its time for me to deal with my hangover and prepare for another night. Last night was solid for me and I'm hoping to meet up with the first girls I met.
Player's Log / Lounge - philosophical_recovery - 12-10-2016
Saw these posts by XXL.
thread-51849...pid1158338
thread-51849...pid1161160
These are incredible. I had not seen them before.
I'm going to straight up say that my frame control needs a lot of work. Tons. I've improved a lot due to some recent challenges but XXL describes here exactly what I needed to read.
I think a lot of what I was able to do in the past was due to a large amount of social proof and being relatively good looking. My frame would slip a lot with some girls, and I would express outward frustration. Sometimes they handled it, sometimes they didn't. I'm not proud of it either way.
Looking back, I got even more sloppy with the hot chick that I didn't think would come over out of the blue to bang me after not talking or seeing her for months. But she did. Then my frame fell to pieces when she didn't respond as quickly as I wanted to another visit.
I satisfied my ego by banging a bunch of subpar girls that, although they were young and fun, I could've been doing a lot better.
If I had just not been such a little, hyperemotional bitch at times then it would've been a lot better.
Chalk it up to the game and move on.
In my youth, I prided myself on being logical. But, I let a lot of my emotions drive me. If I hadn't noticed and caught it, it's just a slippery slope to loserhood in my old age.
It used to take me a lot of time to recover from a perceived rejection. It hasn't been as bad recently but every now and then some kind of rejection brings up a whole bunch of emotions from my past that I have a hard time wrangling in. Think: Something about your best friend nearly killing you when you're younger. I had to get over that initially as a teen but the emotions keep flooding back in certain circumstances. The best way I've found to deal with it is just letting the scar tear more without flinching. It's always going to be more, always going to be part of me, but whatever pathway in my brain that brings it back up is always going to misfire when I perceive a slight.
I have to see that drop in the gut feeling, acknowledge it, let it run through my brain, and move on. Otherwise it's going to keep sidetracking my desires for self improvement.
Player's Log / Lounge - realologist - 12-10-2016
I think I'm going to work on a basic LTR game thread for newbies because these one-itis threads about all their girlfriends are never ending.
Player's Log / Lounge - Travesty - 12-10-2016
I love that story where the blind guy starts falling in love with a chick and his friend finally tells him she's a dog, then he immediately dumps her.
Player's Log / Lounge - kaotic - 12-10-2016
Quote: (12-09-2016 10:54 PM)LeoneVolpe Wrote:
^ A couple of things come to mind...
If he met her when she was younger, perhaps she used to be better looking and has since hit the wall, like what happened with Pierce Brosnan's wife. Or, perhaps she was a "prize" based off his level of game when he met her, but he's since gone on to develop tighter game from smashing side bitches and can now command hotter poon.
He may not be physically loyal to his girlfriend, but he's emotionally loyal because she's been with him a lot longer than any of the rest of these hos. A faithless player, ironically, will come to appreciate the value of a woman (even if she isn't the best looking) who remains faithful to him even whilst he runs game elsewhere, precisely because his experiences have shown him how quickly bitches come and go.
She's probably relatively low maintenance, treats him well and gives him a feeling of stability. By cheating, he can have his cake and eat it too. He gets the security a long-term relationship provides with the novelty of occasionally getting some sexier strange on the side.
Yeah I've written about this, this is exactly what the scenario was with my ex.
She was a hottie latina, super loyal to me, yet I would smash on the side constantly. She hadn't hit the wall yet but asking for kids and marriage is what did us in and I ended it.
I only loved her and was emotionally attached to her and the other girls were just fun.
You're basically getting the best of both worlds but you become a bit more sociopathic when it comes to relationships.
Because it's happening with the biker girl I'm seeing - I'm connected to her emotionally but still banging other girls (we've never had the "what are we talk" yet")
It works for me, another reason why I don't think I'll be getting into marriage ever, maybe not even children (but who knows, that can change in an instant).
It also shows where your game/skill level is at if you can pull this off - and in 3 years I did a complete 180 - all because I found this forum and it changed my life.
Player's Log / Lounge - Gatekeeper - 12-10-2016
I've had 3 dates the last month (I run a business and work as an engineer, so time is limited). I screened pretty well and they passed the crazy test, or so I thought....My game is a slow cook, I don't aim for ONS, but building trust for subsequent bangs with strong frame, mystery, and high value.
Girl 1 - 27 , music teacher, great rapport, second date was at her place. She decides to order pizza and then asks for my credit card from my wallet. I told her, "Hey, what are you doing?" She then goes into a tirade of "Men should have to pay for all the meals since we have to give birth to children and you earn more, so you pay". I laughed and proceeded to get up and leave as imagined sex would require a consent form...crazy town!
Date 2: Flirty 39-year old Filipina, total control from initial contact in terms of meeting, time, and location. Met at a bar, ordered some apps, then the crazy train takes off:
"All my friends are married, I am the last one"
"My last boyfriend almost committed suicide"
"I broke up with my fiance after 7 years"
"I have 3 cats"
However, I deal with it because the body is crazy, double D's on a hundred pound frame and they are real.
Then she proceeds to tell me via text that I didn't tip enough for the bill (which I did).
These Asian broads are real touchy with tipping and wait staff...nexted...
I still have the main girl at home, but I am all about re-establishing my rotation...
Player's Log / Lounge - gxanthan - 12-11-2016
First post: 35yo male in Chicago (among other cities due to work). I hate that this is my first post.
To my shame, I didn't screen heavily enough with this one. Tinder date, profile said 36. Profile photos were carefully selected to show tone and tan. Red flag went off when she said "my mom had me when she was 40, and both parents are in their 80s." Somehow the lines around her eyes hadn't gotten their message past my desire to get laid. Last time I set the Tinder filter to anything higher than 27. Self-proclaimed gym rat, so I figured she had something going on beneath the baggy sweater. Key word was "baggy." Fuck.
Got her home and unwrapped. Old woman tits and mosquito bites - complete and total slut. Pussy was folded over on itself more than a throw blanket on a sofa. Potato-like sprouts of growth. Her razor must have recoiled. I kept my manhood concealed and sent her home with a self-deprecating excuse and grace. Faux dignity on both sides.
This isn't happening again. Screening heavily next time, and listening to my inner better man. If tits don't look perky, they often ain't. Also, DO NOT text a lot prior to meeting. We'd both already bonded over platonic mutualities. Vibe is built during physical presence. Unmet expectations are a killer. Also, 36 is 36. Don't envision unwrapping a perky 23yo unless you bring home a perky 23yo.
The good news is that I have a date lined up tomorrow night with another girl I actually vetted and have been out with once. Voluptuous and intelligent, 27, 7.5/8.5, well-endowed, prestigious undergrad, super sharp. I already set the terms early: my place, lots of alcohol and cuddling. Her reply: "Can we get dinner? I'll need protein if we are going to drink that much." Yes, my love...you shall have it.
More from me later. Bottom line: out of an LTR, good body, strong and well-educated. Going to try my luck with the mid-to-high 20s range, and over time bend that age curve down to the 22-25s. After I knock the carbon off, I'm going to target 8s and above. Will share with you my lessons learned.
Player's Log / Lounge - LeoneVolpe - 12-11-2016
Quote: (12-10-2016 10:07 PM)kaotic Wrote:
Quote: (12-09-2016 10:54 PM)LeoneVolpe Wrote:
^ A couple of things come to mind...
If he met her when she was younger, perhaps she used to be better looking and has since hit the wall, like what happened with Pierce Brosnan's wife. Or, perhaps she was a "prize" based off his level of game when he met her, but he's since gone on to develop tighter game from smashing side bitches and can now command hotter poon.
He may not be physically loyal to his girlfriend, but he's emotionally loyal because she's been with him a lot longer than any of the rest of these hos. A faithless player, ironically, will come to appreciate the value of a woman (even if she isn't the best looking) who remains faithful to him even whilst he runs game elsewhere, precisely because his experiences have shown him how quickly bitches come and go.
She's probably relatively low maintenance, treats him well and gives him a feeling of stability. By cheating, he can have his cake and eat it too. He gets the security a long-term relationship provides with the novelty of occasionally getting some sexier strange on the side.
Yeah I've written about this, this is exactly what the scenario was with my ex.
She was a hottie latina, super loyal to me, yet I would smash on the side constantly. She hadn't hit the wall yet but asking for kids and marriage is what did us in and I ended it.
I only loved her and was emotionally attached to her and the other girls were just fun.
You're basically getting the best of both worlds but you become a bit more sociopathic when it comes to relationships.
Because it's happening with the biker girl I'm seeing - I'm connected to her emotionally but still banging other girls (we've never had the "what are we talk" yet")
It works for me, another reason why I don't think I'll be getting into marriage ever, maybe not even children (but who knows, that can change in an instant).
It also shows where your game/skill level is at if you can pull this off - and in 3 years I did a complete 180 - all because I found this forum and it changed my life.
Several months ago, I was browsing through RVF and I stumbled across that thread, the one you were discussing what you were going through in your relationship with your now ex. I read it in its entirety, and I'm not ashamed to admit it was an emotional read for me. In fact, it's stuck with me ever since.
If anyone ever needed proof of the love, camaraderie and sense of brotherhood this forum inspires, they needn't look any further than that thread.
I've been in your same shoes, as I'm sure many of us RVF'ers have, but not everyone has the brass balls to do what you did. That took REAL fucking strength, man. A lot of guys talk the talk, but in that thread you proved you walk the walk. You have my respect.
kaotic had the balls to take the road less traveled. As I see it, he could've chosen to keep his girl to himself, although he didn't share her same vision for the future. In time, he could've probably gotten her to see things his way and forgo her own dreams of marriage and children in the process. But he didn't. Nor did he compromise what he wanted from his own life by giving into what she wanted for hers. In his own way, by walking away, he showed in one fell swoop that he had more love for her than she probably ever knew, and more respect for himself than he ever realized.
To any newbies out there, track down that fucking post. If you can make it through that, and not be left feeling a little misty-eyed, you must have ice water running through your veins. So many great lessons can be learned just reading through what kaotic experienced. Learn from his story.
Player's Log / Lounge - tomzestatlu - 12-11-2016
Went to a club after few months with no intention of approaching. But the situation is still to bad. There are too many guys and not enough girls. Around every girl there are 10 beta orbiters inviting them free drinks. This pretty girl is being approached approximately every minute. Night game is over.
Player's Log / Lounge - littlehorse - 12-11-2016
Guys I'm a latina lover but danm , You can't trust those bitchies !
I keep learning the true nature of women with them.
I live in Europe and use to see/date foreign girls.
100% of the time (11 girls) , I discovered through social network that they have boyfriend back in their own country.
And even when they are back there, they keep sending me nudes and inviting me to come over. I can still see pictures of her boyfriend and her posted online ahahah.
One from Venezuela even told me "una mentira blanca no es una mentira" , translate it by a little lie is not a lie.
I don't know if I'm complaining here or if I'm hurtbutt but they are definitely killing my last blue pill parts.
Player's Log / Lounge - kaotic - 12-11-2016
Quote: (12-11-2016 03:24 AM)LeoneVolpe Wrote:
Several months ago, I was browsing through RVF and I stumbled across that thread, the one you were discussing what you were going through in your relationship with your now ex. I read it in its entirety, and I'm not ashamed to admit it was an emotional read for me. In fact, it's stuck with me ever since.
If anyone ever needed proof of the love, camaraderie and sense of brotherhood this forum inspires, they needn't look any further than that thread.
It still is a tough read for me, I'm not afraid to say she was the closest girl that I've been that deeply intimate with.
I think the worst part was her getting a new dude right after we broke, which even harder to swallow than me dumping her.
Some women will just touch your soul.
Quote:Quote:
I've been in your same shoes, as I'm sure many of us RVF'ers have, but not everyone has the brass balls to do what you did. That took REAL fucking strength, man. A lot of guys talk the talk, but in that thread you proved you walk the walk. You have my respect.
Thanks man, that means alot to me, don't forget you're at the top of the list of members I want to meet. You're definitely one of my brothers on here.
Quote:Quote:
kaotic had the balls to take the road less traveled. As I see it, he could've chosen to keep his girl to himself, although he didn't share her same vision for the future. In time, he could've probably gotten her to see things his way and forgo her own dreams of marriage and children in the process. But he didn't. Nor did he compromise what he wanted from his own life by giving into what she wanted for hers. In his own way, by walking away, he showed in one fell swoop that he had more love for her than she probably ever knew, and more respect for himself than he ever realized.
You're right I could've strung it out, maybe made her forget about our conversation, but deep down I knew this woman loved me that much she wanted my children and a family her dying father could see.
This is true meaning of "if you love her, you have to let her go" - she may realize it someday, maybe she realized it that afternoon, but I've got guns that I stuck too and it was the right call in the end.
I'm starting to have strong emotions with this biker girl, she's got the same personality like my ex did, she loves going to shows like I do, she likes guns and bikes, honestly, she does remind of my ex.
Even my friends have said I have a "type of girl" - dark hair, lighter skin, possible tattoos.
Quote:Quote:
To any newbies out there, track down that fucking post. If you can make it through that, and not be left feeling a little misty-eyed, you must have ice water running through your veins. So many great lessons can be learned just reading through what kaotic experienced. Learn from his story.
To the newbies-
You can read my thread about ending that LTR here:
thread-52295.html
Player's Log / Lounge - Spidey - 12-11-2016
Last night I saw a cute girl with her OK friend. Her OK friend really liked me, so I leveraged her to talk to the cuter one. I merged into their group, and just like the night before, tried not to choose one and work on both instead.
This time I got both of the girls to come back to my house. We drank a bit more and smoked some weed. Danced in the rain. All sorts of fun shit.
I made them kiss a lot, but the more attractive girl didn't really seem into the idea of a threesome. Her less attractive friend loved the idea and was basically raping both of us. I think that made the more attractive girl uncomfortable.
End of the night the attractive girl is falling asleep, but her friend wants to fuck. So I fuck her with her friend laying right next to us. Then the girl freaks out once we start really fucking. Tells me to stop.
I'm thinking she felt awkward with her friend literally next to us.
At first I was kind of pissed about this not happening, but then I remembered morning sex. Fell asleep peacefully sandwiched in between two girls.
Next morning the OK girl wakes up and rushes out saying she has to go to a lunch with her family. Me and the more attractive girl eat some special cookies and chill out for a bit just enjoying the beautiful morning.
Then I got to fuck the hotter girl.
I'm now getting determined to have a threesome. I feel like it's close.
Player's Log / Lounge - augen sehen - 12-11-2016
Sometimes I see a girl and I'm like "Damn, that girl is hot as fuck"
And then that girl shows some kind of interest in me. Could be real, could be imaginary on my part.
Then I start thinking, nah that girl isn't really that hot... those elbows are too pointy and she should really do something about how shiny her hair is.
Anyone feel that way? I feel like I'm channeling Groucho Marx.
Player's Log / Lounge - kaotic - 12-11-2016
Quote: (12-11-2016 05:33 PM)augen sehen Wrote:
Sometimes I see a girl and I'm like "Damn, that girl is hot as fuck"
And then that girl shows some kind of interest in me. Could be real, could be imaginary on my part.
Then I start thinking, nah that girl isn't really that hot... those elbows are too pointy and she should really do something about how shiny her hair is.
Anyone feel that way? I feel like I'm channeling Groucho Marx.
Why not approach and open her ? Sounds like you're making excuses for yourself.
It sounds like you have approach anxiety and hamster reasons why you shouldn't go and talk to her, we're all guilty of doing it.
We're afraid of rejection, think we aren't good enough for them or a numerous amount of other excuses.
The only way you overcome is go and approach that woman and talk to her.
Player's Log / Lounge - augen sehen - 12-11-2016
Quote: (12-11-2016 06:13 PM)kaotic Wrote:
Why not approach and open her ? Sounds like you're making excuses for yourself.
It sounds like you have approach anxiety and hamster reasons why you shouldn't go and talk to her, we're all guilty of doing it.
Bingo. Leaving aside cold approach, this happens too often in social circle or work where two factors come in - the girl likes me more after seeing I'm social, plus I'm not keen to be rejected or can't put my sexual being out there so to speak. How do you do "simmer game" where you talk to the chick in like a secret society way and then smash in private?