[YoungGunner]

This might also belong in the newbie forum but Day Bang talks about eye-contact a lot so I was wondering if I could get some clarification.

I'm curious how we define eye-contact when we're talking about girls showing interest. As in, is it when two people coincidentally lock eyes at the same time, or is it when you notice someone looking at you with your peripheral vision and then you look at them and lock eyes?

For example, say there's a group of 7 girls standing in a circle, all absorbed in some conversation to the point where cold approaching would be suicide. But, you notice out of the corner of your eye one of them looking in your direction. You then look at her and lock eyes, indicating she was indeed looking at you. In this case, I'd try to find a way to isolate her because she looked at me before we made eye contact.

Now, if instead I were looking in that one girl's general direction and she were looking at her friends, but notices someone (me) looking in her general direction and makes eye contact with me, that's not necessarily a sign of interest is it, since she's just following human nature to look when you sense someone is looking at you?

Also, how long should she hold initial eye contact with you for it to be considered a sign of interest? If a girl is alone or in a small group I'll approach regardless of eye contact, but if it's a larger group and the girl immediately looks away after I make eye contact I take it that's also not a sign of interest.

But, even if she looks away immediately, is it a good sign if she kind of widens her gaze when it happens or if she looks down?

As I said, this is all more for target selection in a crowded venue and choosing whether or not to approach large groups rather than whether or not to approach a small group or individual girl, since I'd do that regardless.

[thegmanifesto]

Younggun -

"Also, how long should she hold initial eye contact with you for it to be considered a sign of interest? "

Watch for pupil dilation.

This is an advanced move. Pupil dilation means a girl is excited/attracted.

Interestingly enough, when people are on E-Tabs, their pupils will dilated.

If you are on them, you give out that you are attracted to people, which in turn makes them attracted to you.

If someone could come up with a pill to just make their pupils dilate, you might be sitting on a gold mine.

This actually has me thinking...

[Dash Global]

You can tell when someone is LOOKING at you.

Not just one random eye locking moment.

It is not hard to notice being EYE FUCKED.

[ersatz]

There are eye drops that make your pupils stay dilated for hours. I had them when I got eye exams. You have to walk outside with sunglasses although (or even inside) since the light too intense.

[thegmanifesto]

(01-04-2012 07:49 PM)ersatz Wrote:  

There are eye drops that make your pupils stay dilated for hours. I had them when I got eye exams. You have to walk outside with sunglasses although (or even inside) since the light too intense.

How do you get your mitts on these?

[Kickb]

I have naturally large pupils but i looked around for you andI cant find a place to buy them. I should mass produce, rebrand, and sell mydriatic eye drops and market it towards the pickup crowd as the biggest thing you can do to make you more attractive to the opposite sex.

[YoungGunner]

(01-04-2012 07:20 PM)thegmanifesto Wrote:  

Younggun -

"Also, how long should she hold initial eye contact with you for it to be considered a sign of interest? "

Watch for pupil dilation.

This is an advanced move. Pupil dilation means a girl is excited/attracted.

Interestingly enough, when people are on E-Tabs, their pupils will dilated.

If you are on them, you give out that you are attracted to people, which in turn makes them attracted to you.

If someone could come up with a pill to just make their pupils dilate, you might be sitting on a gold mine.

This actually has me thinking...

Damn, now that I think about it in most of my bangs the girl had dilated pupils when I talked to her and slightly raised her eyelids when we first made eye contact. This is like matrix-level game when you can notice and mark down all these tiny details.


Dash- Got it. I just wanted to distinguish between accidental eye contact and someone looking at you as a sign of interest. Usually if she holds eye contact for 1 second (which feels longer than it is) or with the corner of my eye I notice her looking at me for around 2-3 seconds I know to approach. Maybe I'm pulling that number out of my ass but that's what it feels like.

[YoungGunner]

I found something on the drops also: http://www.pgcfa.org/kb/entry/166/

"There are two main groups of dilating drops [not all drug company names listed]:

Parasympathetic antagonists (parasympatholytics): act by paralyzing the iris sphincter muscle. This category of medicines will both make the pupil larger and paralyze the muscle involved in focusing of the lens (accommodation). As a result, they will cause the eye to be blurry especially for up close (reading, near play).

Tropicamide: (drug company names include Tropicamide, Mydriacyl, Tropicacyl) Drops available as 0.5% (used in premature infants) and 1%. Duration of action: up to 6 hours.
Cyclopentolate: (Ak-Pentolate, Diopentolate, Cyclogyl) Drops available as 0.5% (used in premature infants) 1% and 2% (rarely used). Duration of action: up to 24 hours.
Homatropine: (Isopto Homatropine) Drops available as 2% and 5%. The lower strength is usually preferred in children. Duration of action: 2-3 days.
Atropine: (Atropisol, Isopto Atropine) Drops available as 0.5% or 1% (0.5% only available as special preparation from selected pharmacies, recommended for infants less than 1 year old), ointment 1%. Duration of action: 1-2 weeks.

Sympathetic agonists (sympathomimetics): act by stimulating the iris dilator muscle.
Phenylephrine: (Ak-Dilate, Dionephrine, Mydfrin, Prefrin Liquifilm, Spersaphrine). Drops available as 2.5% and 10% (Should never be used in children). Duration of action 3-6 hours.
Although the advantage of phenylephrine is that it does not cause blurring of vision like the parasympatholytics it tends not to dilate the pupil well enough unless used in combination with parasympatholytics. Some doctors chose to use both types of drops mixed in the same bottle: for example, 0.8% tropicamide + 5% phenylephrine"

Doesn't look like you can order them online without a prescription, but you could try to pick them up if your in a country that sells stuff like this over the counter like Canada

Maybe Mr. GM can chime in since he's in pharma

Anyway, not sure about using this long term though as it could destroy your eyesight.

[Stitch]

and make sure you don't have to read anything when you're on them (I've had my eyes dilated a few times. If you absolutely must read something, punch a small hole in a piece of paper or make a little tiny hole with your thumb and forefinger; basically you make a pinhole camera and it focuses for you)

[ersatz]

(01-04-2012 07:51 PM)thegmanifesto Wrote:  

(01-04-2012 07:49 PM)ersatz Wrote:  

There are eye drops that make your pupils stay dilated for hours. I had them when I got eye exams. You have to walk outside with sunglasses although (or even inside) since the light too intense.

How do you get your mitts on these?

The eye doctor nurse put them in my eyes. I didn't get them myself. A quick web search for "pupil dialating eye drops" gave me this website:

http://www.pgcfa.org/kb/entry/166/

They're called 'mydriatic medications'.

It really dilates your eyes to the max, it can look pretty weird. Look at the wikipedia page for mydriasis for a picture

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mydriasis

I have pretty huge eyes, but my really strong glasses prescription shrinks their apparent size. I wonder if it would be an improvement if people can see them or not.

[kbell]

You get them at an optometrist office although not sure how you get them illegaly. It also makes them see well in dark light, but blind in bright light.

[at350zguyy]

even for someone like me who hasn't been doing this for very long, it's pretty obvious to know when a girl is checking you out. i never knew about the pupil dilation, gman, but ill be looking out for this a little more closely now that you mention it.

[Dash Global]

(01-04-2012 11:04 PM)YoungGunner Wrote:  

Dash- Got it. I just wanted to distinguish between accidental eye contact and someone looking at you as a sign of interest. Usually if she holds eye contact for 1 second (which feels longer than it is) or with the corner of my eye I notice her looking at me for around 2-3 seconds I know to approach. Maybe I'm pulling that number out of my ass but that's what it feels like.

Not even that. You are making it more complicated than it is imo.

One time eye contact for 1 second isnt a great IOI

MULTIPLE EYE CONTACTS is what you need to be looking for.

Just understand EYE FUCKING and you will be good to go.

aka

1) Long periods of obvious eye contact
2) Always looking in your direction / numerous obvious eye contacts

[robreke]

Most of these posts on eye contact focus on when you catch the girl giving you eye contact first.

What about when you see a cutie chatting with someone in a coffeeshop or other outing or just sitting at a table, etc....and you want to let her catch YOU LOOKING AT HER.

Do any of you guys do this? That is, look at a girl until she notices you looking at her? Do any of you use this as one of your main methods of pickup/ probing for interest pre-approach?

How do you usually employ it? Facial expression so as not to creep her out?

[ManVsMachine]

(01-04-2012 07:20 PM)thegmanifesto Wrote:  

Younggun -

"Also, how long should she hold initial eye contact with you for it to be considered a sign of interest? "

Watch for pupil dilation.

This is an advanced move. Pupil dilation means a girl is excited/attracted.

I used to do this movie but I have a couple of blue-eyed chick friends whose pupils dilate on everyone.


That could mean something else tho, LOL.


Co-sign on the molly though - it drastically reduces your meet-to-hookup time and I firmly believe its because of that.

[Hazaer]

Something on the lack of eye contact that I would like to ask here. I casually locked gaze with a girl with a smirk/slight smile. Since then, everytime I am in her vicinity she is looking down without giving any eye contact. Is it safe to assume that I should next her?

If so, it brings me to my next question. How do we indicate a lack of interest towards a girl using some eye/face movement while appearing cool and not hostile? Here I am probably asking for the male version of the 'eyeroll'. Might be useful to bring some girls down from the pedestal.

Thanks guys.

[456]

My Eye-M-O, all happening within 5 seconds:

1. Look at girl, neutral-to-bedroom face, no smile

2. If she looks back, wait a beat then break into a knowing half-smile / smirk

3. If she begins to smile as well, wait a beat then flash full smile

4. ::
By now we've been pinging back and forth in our own micro-expressions dance and we'll both chuckle a tiny bit -- this is the moment where it's 100% expected and welcomed for me to approach.

At this point, a nicely inflected "Hi" will do (slightly drawn out, slight head tilt, as if she was meant to meet you that day -- hard to put into words, but it's the Hi you say when you Know It's On).

Want to get a little bolder? I like "how you gonna smile at me like that and not even say Hi?" paired with a sly grin.

If steps 1. 2. and 3. all occur, it's like 95% the approach will go smoothly and any possibility of "embarrassment" is long gone.

Pro-tip: subtly close the distance between you and her as you finally speak to her. This ramps up the tingles in the moments between 1. 2. 3. and the actual approach.

(02-17-2015 11:44 AM)robreke Wrote:  

Most of these posts on eye contact focus on when you catch the girl giving you eye contact first.

What about when you see a cutie chatting with someone in a coffeeshop or other outing or just sitting at a table, etc....and you want to let her catch YOU LOOKING AT HER.

Do any of you guys do this? That is, look at a girl until she notices you looking at her? Do any of you use this as one of your main methods of pickup/ probing for interest pre-approach?

How do you usually employ it? Facial expression so as not to creep her out?

[Hazaer]

(08-09-2016 08:08 PM)456 Wrote:  

My Eye-M-O, all happening within 5 seconds:

1. Look at girl, neutral-to-bedroom face, no smile

2. If she looks back, wait a beat then break into a knowing half-smile / smirk

3. If she begins to smile as well, wait a beat then flash full smile

4. ::
By now we've been pinging back and forth in our own micro-expressions dance and we'll both chuckle a tiny bit -- this is the moment where it's 100% expected and welcomed for me to approach.

At this point, a nicely inflected "Hi" will do (slightly drawn out, slight head tilt, as if she was meant to meet you that day -- hard to put into words, but it's the Hi you say when you Know It's On).

Want to get a little bolder? I like "how you gonna smile at me like that and not even say Hi?" paired with a sly grin.

If steps 1. 2. and 3. all occur, it's like 95% the approach will go smoothly and any possibility of "embarrassment" is long gone.

Pro-tip: subtly close the distance between you and her as you finally speak to her. This ramps up the tingles in the moments between 1. 2. 3. and the actual approach.

(02-17-2015 11:44 AM)robreke Wrote:  

Most of these posts on eye contact focus on when you catch the girl giving you eye contact first.

What about when you see a cutie chatting with someone in a coffeeshop or other outing or just sitting at a table, etc....and you want to let her catch YOU LOOKING AT HER.

Do any of you guys do this? That is, look at a girl until she notices you looking at her? Do any of you use this as one of your main methods of pickup/ probing for interest pre-approach?

How do you usually employ it? Facial expression so as not to creep her out?

I notice that girls do not smile as much when it is getting darker like in the evening and there is only the two of you there. 'Hey' might be better than 'Hi' according to Bang.

Sometimes girls give a very quick smile upon eye contact but do not slow down the speed of their walk.. I am not sure if its just courtesy.

Also, alluding to my previous post, I am thinking that girls who do not give eye contact at all are probably not interested even if they are looking down.

What have your experiences been?

[456]

Well look -- ultimately, a cold approach shouldn't care whether she even sees you. You can go up to her and make yourself known with words.

I'm just talking about this oft-underutilized method of "procuring" eye contact.

And Hey vs Hi is irrelevant on paper -- it's all in how you say it / carry yourself / feel your own sexiness.

I don't think time of day matters -- if two people catch each other's eye, one cracks a smile, the other cracks a smile back, the other extends the smile, the other extends smile back, human convention has it that someone will say something.

I'm mostly referring to when we're walking towards each other in opposite directions, or standing around in the same area.

Put it this way: ever been to a house party? Everyone knows at least one person (the host), and people are expected to mingle and say hi. How does that go down? You notice you're meeting eyes with someone nearby, and one of you says hi first. It's very natural. It's about extending this vibe to the sidewalk or bar or elsewhere.

Yes, if she returns your eye contact, looks pissed / away, and keeps walking on, that's a No.

If she returns eye contact but looks down, yeah yeah, we've all read that's "submissive" -- choose whether to continue approaching or not.

I'm talking about fishing for the "easier lay-up" of happily returned eye contact. There's something automatic about smiling when someone you're making eyes at smiles at you.

[Hazaer]

(08-10-2016 01:09 PM)456 Wrote:  

Well look -- ultimately, a cold approach shouldn't care whether she even sees you. You can go up to her and make yourself known with words.

I'm just talking about this oft-underutilized method of "procuring" eye contact.

And Hey vs Hi is irrelevant on paper -- it's all in how you say it / carry yourself / feel your own sexiness.

I don't think time of day matters -- if two people catch each other's eye, one cracks a smile, the other cracks a smile back, the other extends the smile, the other extends smile back, human convention has it that someone will say something.

I'm mostly referring to when we're walking towards each other in opposite directions, or standing around in the same area.

Put it this way: ever been to a house party? Everyone knows at least one person (the host), and people are expected to mingle and say hi. How does that go down? You notice you're meeting eyes with someone nearby, and one of you says hi first. It's very natural. It's about extending this vibe to the sidewalk or bar or elsewhere.

Yes, if she returns your eye contact, looks pissed / away, and keeps walking on, that's a No.

If she returns eye contact but looks down, yeah yeah, we've all read that's "submissive" -- choose whether to continue approaching or not.

I'm talking about fishing for the "easier lay-up" of happily returned eye contact. There's something automatic about smiling when someone you're making eyes at smiles at you.

Some girls just look down without giving eye contact but I am sure they have already seem me approaching when I was not looking. This puzzles me.

Another issue is how some girls who you might regularly see always never give you eye contact. You tried to have eye contact twice or thrice and and she is probably aware but doesnt return it. I am wondering if there is a way of telling her through your eyes that you are no longer interested the next time you pass by her. Looking straight ahead might make one seem like a zombie. Perhaps looking away might help but it has to be natural. Any suggestions on something that puts out a feeling of indifference after you might have been seen as too needy or creepy after fishing for eye contact before that?

[Euphoria]

I eye fuck nearly any woman passes boner test. Hell, sometimes i accidentally making eye contact with ugly and/or old woman and she feels nervous immediately, meanwhile i feel disgusted.


This thread made me want eye fuck woman.

[Easy_C]

Which way they look away can mean different things. It takes practice to read but looking down is generally a good thing because more often than not it's an instinctive submissive reaction to a guy they like.

If they look away it's generally bad news because they don't want to look at you. The difference is that in the first case they're acknowledging you, in the second they're just trying to get you out of their field of view.

It just takes practice. Notice how they look away and how quick/sharp the movement is. A smoother movement is generally more deliberately choosing to break eye contact rather than a reflexive feeling of not wanting to make eye contact. The first one means that her subconscious has recognized and accepted the interaction, the latter means that she's rejected the interaction.