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Popularity and dating
#1

Popularity and dating

hi sir,
i am a senior in high school, and i just transferred into my school this year. I have always been a somewhat a popular guy but when everyone knows each other for over three years and you try to join their inner circle or even be friends with them it si a little intimidating. I got off to a great start by introducing myself and being cool with them. A lot of people know me and they say hi and whats up but i mean there is no real connection because i dont know how to go farther with this. This is both for girls and boys. So i hope you can help me with that. I really need to become more known in the school. And also i really need help with my game with girls. Dont get me wrong though, i dont want to get laid, I just want to become close friends with girls who are both popular and not so popular, and maybe even getting a date advice. Please save my high school life lol.

Thanx
Yasa
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#2

Popularity and dating

The same thing happened to me my senior year of high school man. My first three years, I was a fairly popular athlete, (football and track) and while I wasn't THE MAN, everyone knew who I was, I had a lot of friends, I went to the parties, ect.

Then, right before my senior year because of my parents divorce, I had to move 500 miles away to be a senior. It sucked some hairy testicles. I went to a few football workouts but quit after a week because I hated the thought of not starting as a senior (I was in line to start at my old school). The first day of school, a hot blonde cheerleader who sat in front of me in English introduced herself and invited me to eat lunch with her and all her friends and then gave me her number. I was too much of a sad little bitch to ever call her, and she ended up winning Homecoming Queen a month or so later.

I resented my situation so much that I became sort of depressed and decided that I wasn't going to have a good year. I made no effort to meet people and while a had a few friends from class that I hung with, I didn't really like them and I never went when they invited me to parties.
As you can imagine, my senior year wasn't much fun.

Basically, man, just realize that this is it for high school. You can't ever go back once it's over. Do whatever it is that you enjoy doing and don't waste time feeling sorry for yourself because you were popular and now all of a sudden you're not. Be friendly to everyone and be open to hanging out with just about anyone. Don't worry too much about getting laid at this point because you have plenty of time for that. If you do, great, but don't make that your main focus of the rest of this year. Just try to meet as many people as you can. If you played sports at your old school, then play them at your new one. That's the easiest possible way to meet friends. Don't worry about the cliques and trying to climb the popularity ladder either. That shit is for girls. If you are cool and outgoing, girls and guys alike will realize this and (relative) popularity will follow.
I promise if you really want to have a good year and you put effort into it, then you will.
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#3

Popularity and dating

Quote: (11-29-2011 09:26 PM)Only One Man Wrote:  

The same thing happened to me my senior year of high school man. My first three years, I was a fairly popular athlete, (football and track) and while I wasn't THE MAN, everyone knew who I was, I had a lot of friends, I went to the parties, ect.

Then, right before my senior year because of my parents divorce, I had to move 500 miles away to be a senior. It sucked some hairy testicles. I went to a few football workouts but quit after a week because I hated the thought of not starting as a senior (I was in line to start at my old school). The first day of school, a hot blonde cheerleader who sat in front of me in English introduced herself and invited me to eat lunch with her and all her friends and then gave me her number. I was too much of a sad little bitch to ever call her, and she ended up winning Homecoming Queen a month or so later.

I resented my situation so much that I became sort of depressed and decided that I wasn't going to have a good year. I made no effort to meet people and while a had a few friends from class that I hung with, I didn't really like them and I never went when they invited me to parties.
As you can imagine, my senior year wasn't much fun.

Basically, man, just realize that this is it for high school. You can't ever go back once it's over. Do whatever it is that you enjoy doing and don't waste time feeling sorry for yourself because you were popular and now all of a sudden you're not. Be friendly to everyone and be open to hanging out with just about anyone. Don't worry too much about getting laid at this point because you have plenty of time for that. If you do, great, but don't make that your main focus of the rest of this year. Just try to meet as many people as you can. If you played sports at your old school, then play them at your new one. That's the easiest possible way to meet friends. Don't worry about the cliques and trying to climb the popularity ladder either. That shit is for girls. If you are cool and outgoing, girls and guys alike will realize this and (relative) popularity will follow.
I promise if you really want to have a good year and you put effort into it, then you will.
Dude i get exactly what you are saying
But i want to know how do i put in the effort. I want to know how to get invited to parties and meet girls and stuff. It came naturally before because i was with those people for three years and everyone was at a default state if you know what i mean. Its like im a newly booted pc, but they have been used pcs. Like how do i change that. I just want to be a part of the school. I am in no way a shy person but everyone thinks i am because i don't talk to anyone because they're always with their friends. I really need advice on getting a lot of friends that happen to be girls. Please help em out.
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#4

Popularity and dating

Well first of all, do you play any sports? If not, what are your interests? What do you do?

I would imagine that in at least one of your classes, a good looking girl sits next to you or close to you. If that's the case, try to get to know her. Don't be afraid to say "I'm new here, I don't know many people yet, ect," as long as you don't come off as emo or weird when you do. If you're witty or funny, make sure she realizes it.

Same thing with cool dudes. If one sits near you, try to chat him up, crack jokes ect. If he's a star athlete at the school though, make sure you don't suck his dick and tell him how he's the man. He's heard that enough from teachers and other students already.

Whether it's a guy or girl, just try to get to the point where you're talking and joking around almost every class and then it becomes a lot easier to ask them to hang out. When you see them in the hall, stop to say what's up for a minute and they will almost always introduce you to the friends they're with. Make sure you talk to them in class a lot before stopping to talk in the hall, though, or it might get awkward.

Do this with as many people as you can, and if you're cool, you will eventually be saying what's up to a lot of people and they will be down to hang out with you because they won't think you don't know anyone but them. It takes some time, but it will pay off.
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#5

Popularity and dating

Quote: (11-29-2011 10:15 PM)Only One Man Wrote:  

Well first of all, do you play any sports? If not, what are your interests? What do you do?

I would imagine that in at least one of your classes, a good looking girl sits next to you or close to you. If that's the case, try to get to know her. Don't be afraid to say "I'm new here, I don't know many people yet, ect," as long as you don't come off as emo or weird when you do. If you're witty or funny, make sure she realizes it.

Same thing with cool dudes. If one sits near you, try to chat him up, crack jokes ect. If he's a star athlete at the school though, make sure you don't suck his dick and tell him how he's the man. He's heard that enough from teachers and other students already.

Whether it's a guy or girl, just try to get to the point where you're talking and joking around almost every class and then it becomes a lot easier to ask them to hang out. When you see them in the hall, stop to say what's up for a minute and they will almost always introduce you to the friends they're with. Make sure you talk to them in class a lot before stopping to talk in the hall, though, or it might get awkward.

Do this with as many people as you can, and if you're cool, you will eventually be saying what's up to a lot of people and they will be down to hang out with you because they won't think you don't know anyone but them. It takes some time, but it will pay off.

Thats the thing though man. I've already established with a crapload of people that i am new. I got off to a great start with girls and everything. But it just started getting hard because i dont where to go from introductions. Like what do i say to be funny. I got cut from the basketball team like last week before the first week. So yeah! And when i am at lunch i don't know what to do sometimes because i cant just sit and talk to people who i don't know u know. And how do i approach girls? Like do i say whats up beautiful and stuff? And the biggest thing is trying to get hugs as a first step. How do i get the hugs? Ive gotten a few but i couldn't escalate the situation, as in hang out with them because i don't know how to.Any suggestions
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#6

Popularity and dating

Dude I can't tell you what to say to be funny. You're either funny or you're not. Of course, you can work on becoming funny, but that by itself takes a lot of effort, although it's something you should strive for.

That's what sucks about being a senior who has no seniority. You can't play JV as a senior and you're not going to make varsity if you're not that good. I assume at your old school you would have at least made the team as a benchwarmer if you had worked your way up the previous three years.

I had the lunch problem too, although I was able to change my schedule so that all 5 of my classes were in the morning and when lunchtime came around, I was done for the day. I wish I could help you out with this one but I really can't.

Definitely don't say "what's up beautiful." I'm far from a master at approaching girls, but don't ever say that. Read the blogs on here man there's tons of stuff about approaching. In regard to not being able to go anywhere past introductions, you absolutely need to have interesting things to talk about or girls won't have a reason to talk to you. What are your hobbies/interests? If you are interesting, these girls will want to talk to you when they see you.
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#7

Popularity and dating

Quote: (11-29-2011 10:57 PM)Only One Man Wrote:  

Dude I can't tell you what to say to be funny. You're either funny or you're not. Of course, you can work on becoming funny, but that by itself takes a lot of effort, although it's something you should strive for.

That's what sucks about being a senior who has no seniority. You can't play JV as a senior and you're not going to make varsity if you're not that good. I assume at your old school you would have at least made the team as a benchwarmer if you had worked your way up the previous three years.

I had the lunch problem too, although I was able to change my schedule so that all 5 of my classes were in the morning and when lunchtime came around, I was done for the day. I wish I could help you out with this one but I really can't.

Definitely don't say "what's up beautiful." I'm far from a master at approaching girls, but don't ever say that. Read the blogs on here man there's tons of stuff about approaching. In regard to not being able to go anywhere past introductions, you absolutely need to have interesting things to talk about or girls won't have a reason to talk to you. What are your hobbies/interests? If you are interesting, these girls will want to talk to you when they see you.

could u define interesting? lol
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#8

Popularity and dating

Hey man, I feel ya. Shit can be rough in your situation.

Your mindset is wrong. Don't try to 'act cool' or impress the other kids. During lunch, just find some guys/girls and ask to sit with them.

A comfortable way is to meet a girl/guy in class, even just a very superficial thing, and find that person during lunch. Ask them "hey [name], mind if I sit with you?" If you're a normal guy, they will be okay with you chilling.

The idea is to not try to impress people, just be a chill normal guy. Make an effort to hang around the people you want more. When the weekend comes around, ask some of them "you know of any parties going on?" or something like that.

Don't be afraid to be new.

Make sense?

edit: DO NOT COLD APPROACH IN HIGH SCHOOL. It's as simple as making an effort to hang around these people and putting yourself in situations where the girls are. (like lunch time and parties or grabbing food after school). Make your moves at the parties or after some time -- you don't need to rush things when you're going to see the same people day in and day out.
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