[spaceman]

Hey guys,
I have just moved to a new city and am finding it hard to have friends to consistently go out with. So I have resorted to going out by myself. Its kinda weird at first but fun in its own way. You get into all sorts of shenanigans and so far it hasn't been too weird for me.

It is a bit harder to get into "state" as the PUAs would call it but once you get moving (or get a few drink in) , it starts to pick up. I suppose just like a normal bar night.

Any tips or tricks?

[zorgon]

If you just moved, one really easy opener is the whole "I just moved here" theme, which easily leads into any number of related topics. (Where from? Why? How is it different? etc.) Take full advantage of the "I'm new here" thing for at least a full year...

I'm in much the same boat. I'm an independent sort of person anyway, so I don't entirely mind going out by myself. (And on top of that I'm self-employed and work from home. It's not unusual for me to go days without any real social contact.) It does help that, as of this week, UT is now back in school. Total insanity tonight downtown, what with the football season opener...

It can be tempting to try to find another group (either guys or mixed) to hang out with, but I haven't found that to work very well. Better to stay in control of your own destiny. In fact, it's kind of liberating to not have to coordinate plans with other people. (I mean, is there anything worse than going out with guys who just want to talk about guy stuff rather than going after girls? We can talk about guy stuff whenever, when there aren't women around.)

In the end I don't think it's that different. Balls of cold steel are a necessity. Have to be careful not to drink too much, since if you're not chatting with friends it's easy to go through drinks really quickly. Try to move around and surround myself with random people so it's not obvious I'm by myself, although that's difficult if things aren't packed.

[nwo4life]

Agree, the solo mission is a misunderstood gem. It forces you to be more outgoing and once you have a few drinks in you it doesn't seem awkward at all. I used to resort to doing this only on business trips but after moving to London where I knew absolutely nobody, I didn't have a choice. Some girls actually seem to respond better to a guy who is rolling alone.

[JLP]

I must add that since I came to Washington DC I ran into one hilarious woman on a night out on my own, who said under no circumstances should I mention that I'm new to the area, or in her words I would be "eaten alive" by the DC chicks. She recommended claiming I was from Saudi Arabia and promptly gave me some arabic catchphrases to practice. I'm not sure about that advice because too quick it turns into you having to dig yourself deeper into a lie. Thoughts?

[zorgon]

I can see there being a difference between cities in saying that you're new. May not work everywhere, it just seems to have worked all right here (and not just for pickup purposes, people in general tended to be helpful).

[broken]

(08-31-2008 02:12 AM)spaceman Wrote:  

Hey guys,
I have just moved to a new city and am finding it hard to have friends to consistently go out with. So I have resorted to going out by myself. Its kinda weird at first but fun in its own way. You get into all sorts of shenanigans and so far it hasn't been too weird for me.

It is a bit harder to get into "state" as the PUAs would call it but once you get moving (or get a few drink in) , it starts to pick up. I suppose just like a normal bar night.

Any tips or tricks?

1) Go to the same clubs/bars on slow nights. Meet the staff, and make an effort to remember who they are as people. you've heard it before, but it's still good advice. If a bar has service industry night, and you see someone you "know" from another bar - hook them up, and expect nothing in return.

2) I've heard finding your local lair is helpful as well.

[spaceman]

I am looking into my local lair. but i went to the DC one once. it was very weird.

[Roosh]

I don't think dc chicks will "eat you alive." Unless you are weak and buy them shit.

Your best bet is to become a regular at a nice bar. Treat the bartenders there well so when you go it won't feel like you are totally alone. If you come across as interesting, he will be more than happy to introduce you to his friends.

Also i wrote this about the topic last year
http://www.rooshv.com/2007/going-out-alone

[broken]

(08-31-2008 02:10 PM)spaceman Wrote:  

I am looking into my local lair. but i went to the DC one once. it was very weird.

I get that impression about every lair I read about.

Plus I think a lot of those guys go to "The Reef" in Adams Morgan. If i wanted that kinda chick (blonde, college aged, very open to PDA aka a girl gone wild), i'd go to Modern in G.Town or McFadden's in West End.

I know some community dude approached me @ Tryst while I was on a date. His opener was "Merry X-mas". He was wearing this weird scarab and some other "peacocky" stuff. It was a weird experience, because you could see him jump from table to table, like he was selling something. And his crew of friends looked like they were about to hit a LAN party. (not that there's anything wrong with that)

I give props to ol boy for stepping to me and my date and trying to be social, but after Merry X-Mas, his "game" fell flat. You could tell that he was delivering a script. What killed me was that there was a couple of middle eastern hotties next to us, that he could have pawned us to get to.

To his credit, he did seem to get somewhere with this cute asian chick, but I'm talking to my date watching him work, and it was like I was reading from a pick up manual.
- laugh
- touch the waist
- laugh
- touch the forearm
- laugh
et cetera.

It was really informative in terms of my own game.
*note to self, you can open with anything, but you need to be able to take the conversation somewhere*

[Roosh]

I stopped by the reef on saturday actually (i like their beer selection) and we noticed a group of 10 pua's prowling the bar. They were too obvious by constantly looking around with a dress that made it seem like they were trying too hard.

[zorgon]

OK, so I was totally confused about this thread until I finally figured out what you guys meant by "local lair." Duh! Looking at what's out there for Austin now... unfortunately it sounds like they may be inactive...

[JLP]

I was at rocket bar in chinatown sat night - I find that asking random chicks to play board games will draw them away from their group and at the same time establish some good rapport between the two of you... a little connect 4, battleship, uno, and it's on...

[broken]

(09-02-2008 10:35 PM)zorgon Wrote:  

OK, so I was totally confused about this thread until I finally figured out what you guys meant by "local lair." Duh! Looking at what's out there for Austin now... unfortunately it sounds like they may be inactive...

Austin...sigh. Pick Up Heaven, It's like shooting fish in a barrel. I took a lot of advantage of that city, and I'd love to go back.

I'm pretty sure there's a lair in Austin, given that they shot Mystery's show there, and Herbal from "The Game" lives there as well. Plus a bunch of the pro's live in Dallas.

[Trotter]

Austin is a target rich environment. It's just loaded with hot college girls and single moms. Now if you want the unalduterated hook up town it's Johnston City, Tn. It's been a few years since I've been there but I'll never forget it.

It's actually part of an area called Tri-Cities, one of the other towns is called Kingstown and I forget what the third is. I could write a novel about this place and the chicks that live there. Let's just say there's something for everyone there. It is mostly young girls and I will go on the record and say that quite a few of those girls are under 18 and have no qualms about someone twice their age. It's just how things are there and it's not unusual to run across a 16 yo with 2 kids.

The going joke is that you can go to Tri-Cities and find you a nice teen wife with a ready made family. Also they seem to be very interested in the hip-hop culture (the young people), and the chicks seem to think there's a lack of black men to fuck there. And if you're young, black, and edgey you're treated like a rock star.

It's weird seeing these little pockets of the world. You literally can have a different girl every night of the week no problem and without trying hard. I was there from almost 9 days and have 'met' 6 different girls while I was there. There used to be this place called Rafters and it was wall-to-wall women in that place. My first time setting foot in there it was easy setting myself apart from the pack. The dance floor was nothing but women, I mean nothing but. Maybe one or two guys but it's just girl on girl, and sometimes girl on girl on girl, and so on. All of the guys are on the lower floor lined up around the edges drinking beer. Southern types that just aren't into the whole hip-hop thing but there because that's where the ladies are and hoping to get lucky.

In fact, half of those guys probably had a girlfriend on the dance floor. My first night there I just jumped into the dance floor and started working it. In about 3 seconds I was being sandwiched by three girls. I went there with this dude and his girlfriend that I met when I first arrived. She loved that I was out there dancing with her because her guy just wanted to sit and kick some beers back. Later when we were leaving the place she openly was offering to come back to my hotel room to get freaky. The dude is sitting in the truck, and she walks me to my hotel room telling me this. It turns out that's just how it is down there. He was banging things on the side like a jack rabbit too.

[GMoney]

Sun Tzu - The Art of War , replaces "weapon" with penis, and "enemy" with "vagina".

[zorgon]

(09-04-2008 10:38 AM)broken Wrote:  

Austin...sigh. Pick Up Heaven, It's like shooting fish in a barrel. I took a lot of advantage of that city, and I'd love to go back.

Sadly my skills are not really at the level yet where it's easy for me even here in Austin. I have a *lot* of years of general social cluelessness and even worse cluelessness about women to make up for. It's honestly totally embarrassing to look back on my behavior from my, say, junior high and high school days -- there are stories that I would never tell to *anyone* because my behavior was that unbelievably inexcusable and idiotic. I was a total mess of a kid in just about every area not related to math or computers (OK, I exaggerate... we can add chess and music to that list). Probably undiagnosed Asperger's, if I had to guess.

I am definitely making solid progress, but it's still slow going. I know I will get there, just need to keep at it!