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When She Needs to Be Alone
#1

When She Needs to Be Alone

I went out with this chick 4 times, and we banged after every time except our first date.

The night after bang #4, I get the "wyd" text at 12am. I had just seen her the night before, and I was with my friends, so I didn't respond until 230am. We banter that morning(sunday), I try to set up a hang out for Monday, and she says she can't hang until Thursday night, which is a little weird that she's busy Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday. She's usually pretty free, so I say sure.

Out of the blue on Wednesday, she sends me a text that she's not ready to be dating right now (even though I never asked her to be my girlfriend or invited her on a dinner date. All we did was get drinks, watch netflix, and bang.). I sarcastically joked with her "bummer, I was totally going to propose this week", and she laughs. I say "Ok, see you tomorrow - but no getting attached to me *grin emoji*". Radio silence from her.

Today, the day we were supposed to hang out, I wait until late afternoon and say "Hey, confirming for tonight." She responds 3.5 hours later "I don't think that's a good idea. Just need to be alone right now".

What happened here and what's my next move? My best guess is that she's about to get back with her ex, or she met some other dude.

The PUA thing to do here is usually to next her and avoid oneitis. Do I have any other options? She's hot, and if it weren't for these latest shenanigans, I would have said she had girlfriend potential. I should probably ignore her, next her, and maybe she will text me "wyd" over the weekend. Maybe she won't. Whatevs.

Would ignoring her last text about needing to be alone make me come off as butt hurt? I feel like I should say something short and nonchalant like "Sure, take your time"
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#2

When She Needs to Be Alone

A non-response never comes off as butt hurt. It's the most appropriate response in your case. Don't respond with something gay like "take your time".

She basically told you to fuck off with no explanation. Go bang another chick.
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#3

When She Needs to Be Alone

If you only saw her as a good lay, then that's all you should treat her as whenever you communicate or see her in person.

You handled her "no ready to be dating right now" text well. You joked around and passed her shit test.

Since she is just a FB, no need for you to confirm that she is coming over to bang. If she does, great, if she doesn't, you should have a plan B, C, and D. All of which result in you either banging other girls or having fun with your buddies.

Regarding her text about being alone, as Alpone said, no need to respond. She blew you off and is in her own head. I'm betting she is starting to develop some feels for you but feels bad or like a slut because it conflicts with her feelings for her ex.

Start hanging out with other girls, have fun with them. If this girl reaches back out, treat the situation as if nothing happened. It will only help your cause. If you don't hear back, that's her loss. You're the prize.

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#4

When She Needs to Be Alone

That there is another in history, this is indisputable!

If I am you, I let her wander in your contacts... without talking, without blocking and without excluding!
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#5

When She Needs to Be Alone

You're most likely correct. She's sorting shit out with someone else, either in real life or in her head... most likely both.

Her issues aren't your issues and there's no need to get involved. You got the bangs and that's all you're going to get. Your next step is to take her off the bang-pedestal and consider her gone. Don't contact. If she ever hits you up again, you get an unexpected bang. Nothing more.
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#6

When She Needs to Be Alone

Thanks, sounds like we are all in agreement.

I did what you guys said and fought the urge to say something back to her.

Oh, and I used my fake instagram account to stalk her real instagram account.

30 minutes before she sent me that "need to be alone" text, she made some sappy instagram story/status. I quote, the post said "You shouldn't be with someone who's on the fence about being with you. They should be jumping fences to be with you." LOL

So the above IG story/status is clearly not directed at me, but almost definitely at some indecisive ex boyfriend of hers.
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#7

When She Needs to Be Alone

Just hit her up again with a bang offer in a few days adding "I ain't got feels, just want to 'cum and go' with you"

If she knocks back a few consecutive knock backs, go radio silent and (hope) she hits you up again one day,

Meanwhile, go bang other chicks.
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#8

When She Needs to Be Alone

Quote: (03-30-2019 09:20 PM)EmpireState Wrote:  

Thanks, sounds like we are all in agreement.

Just wanted to add that GENERALLY you shouldn't text a girl back late at night like that unless you're doing it really soon after she texts and in order to invite her over.

Otherwise, responding a couple hours later is not only too late, but lets her know that you were actually up and still interested in talking to her instead of all the things she could imagine like:

1. I bet he's banging some other chick....that asshole *tingles*

2. He's probably out having a great time without me *I miss him*

If you're doing either of those things you're certainly not going to respond to her until the next day, right?

So stick with that.

I think kaotic recommends not even texting any girl you're not actively trying to bang THAT NIGHT after 9 PM.

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#9

When She Needs to Be Alone

Quote: (07-09-2018 10:58 AM)PapayaTapper Wrote:  

This was a shit test.


I came up with the following "dread text" a few years ago and have used it several times when shit tests come via text. It's not going to work in this case but maybe next time she or another girl starts to fade (or test) via text

Girl-"Hey I'm really not sure I want to do this anymore...blaha blah"

PT- "Message 401: The ATT subscriber you are trying to reach has changed his settings and is no longer receiving your messages"

Girl "Haha"

(I had cut and pasted the above so it was instant response)

PT- "Message 401: The ATT subscriber you are trying to reach has changed his settings and is no longer receiving your messages"

Girl- "seriously?"

PT- "Message 401: The ATT subscriber you are trying to reach has changed his settings and is no longer receiving your messages"

[i]Two days later after radio silence


Girl-"PT are you still blocking me?"

PT- "Message 401: The ATT subscriber you are trying to reach has changed his settings and is no longer receiving your drama"

Girl- "Im sorry, I was having a bad day"

PT- "Come over here and prove it"

Game on...

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#10

When She Needs to Be Alone

Honestly, a chick bangs you on the first date, she's not going to become your girlfriend. Why would you want a girlfriend that puts out so easily...? It's a red flag.

It's roles reversed here, she was just in it for a good time and you're on an internet board inquiring about how to keep her around. She has done you a favor and has nexted herself. This is almost an ideal situation if you're just in it for sex.
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