[RespectivePerspective]

(12-16-2018 05:41 AM)Kieran Wrote:  

(12-15-2018 10:27 PM)Aenema Wrote:  

It could be me but I feel like professional photos look too try hard from either gender. The exception being if you are an actual paid model, then maybe have ONE on your tinder. I've done best with just normal pics with friends, family, and dog where I look good. No selfies should be a given. Obviously if you have model looks you can use a professional photo and pretend to be a paid model. If you're an average dude like me, girls would think I went out of my way to take online photos to look good on Tinder, and that isn't a good look.

Yeah I agree it's try hard, but the forum is convinced on them. No way would I consider using professional photos, or even ever having them taken.

And I also find it really unappealing if a girl has them that isn't a model. It makes me think she probably has some mental issues like narcissism, is insecure, or whatever.

I agree with that last part, at least with respects to how I swipe on girls in these apps. I’ve often felt inclined to ignore the girls entirely if they didn’t use any normal photos that appeared to have been taken on a whim, rather than staged. This is partly due to me having perceived this as try-hard on their part, and also because judging the truth about her looks becomes far less reliable with only professional photos as a reference. I’m not a mass swiper, as I just cannot stand to reward the validation of land whales in believing they’re worthy of anything but my contempt.

Whenever I see the rare photo without any obvious digital manipulation, it somehow makes her appear more trustworthy and humble. That’s why I was initially surprised by the consensus of the fellas who tested and inferred how significant a positive difference it’s sure to make when fellas use pictures that “pop”, unnaturally even, and having them taken by an experienced working pro with high-end consumer grade/or professional gear. I had already long compartmentalised that women probably shared a similar perspective on what constitutes as try-hard vs bold charisma, but now am convinced by the evidence that thinking through such a lens is not only limiting my potential to get her hamster spinning, but could also very well be one of the more obstructive mental blocks that will hold us back.

But that’s why I allow my faulty preconceptions to be challenged here, so that I can recognise and begin to correct mistakes. Glad you’re all my bros.