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Girl from cold approach not trusting you
#1

Girl from cold approach not trusting you

So i have this girl constantly messaging me. It's every night, she initiates a conversation. The story behind her is she's cute and i met her through cold approach. I always go for the number close because i don't do the social media shit. So i tried my best to keep texting to a minimum, to work out logistics - set up the date etc. And we decided on a date.

A few days later what i think might have happened is she got a little insecure. Who's this guy? How can he just come out of nowhere with no facebook, no instagram, no social circle and swoop me off the floor? Honestly not to brag but i do think this is what went through her mind, because she asked if we could move the date a whole week so she could get to learn me better first. Also she kept asking if i knew X and Y and tried to find a mutual friend she could connect me to, but no luck.

In my mind i thought: "??? isn't that what dates are for, to get to learn another person you don't know?". Anyway i said okay and now she's texting me every day trying to get to know me better, i guess build trust because she said she doesn't trust many guys, she needs to feel safe to jump into things. Which is bearable because she's an 8/10. The problem is, she asked for my snapchat and i didn't want to seem weird/suspicious so i gave it to her, to chat a bit send her videoes showing im just a normal guy. To up the trust.

Now she keeps texting me and 1. i don't want to turn into a texting buddy 2. she takes all the fun away from the date and the conversation you can have if you ask everything over the phone which she's currently doing 3. i can't be bothered to snap back and forth like a teenage boy and im sure if i open her messages and stop responding she will think i lost the interest and the connection slowly die out

I know for a fact she's interested because she seems to take great interest in what i do and what i spend my time on. She's warm and curious to know more about me. But what should i do in the meantime to survive the week until the date itself where i can showcase myself better? Im tired of texting her everything about me.

One thing i thought about doing is straight up telling her "cancel all your plans tomorrow night, we're going out" and see how she reacts and end this text game.
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#2

Girl from cold approach not trusting you

I share your frustrations here. As you pointed out, the whole purpose of a date is to get to know someone. And if you spend a bunch of time messaging back and forth beforehand, it will remove some of the fun and mystery of a first date. Furthermore, it's a huge investment to sink all of your time into messaging a girl when you don't even know if she'll actually ever agree to meet up. I tend to keep texting to a bare minimum even after its a regular thing. I might sent a few witty texts here and there and catch up briefly but otherwise I keep it to logistics.

If I ask a girl out and she says she wants to get to know me more, I usually next them. No reason to waste your time with someone who is that indecisive and naive. And it's likely that they simply want you orbit them until they can determine the highest quality dick that is available to them.

I also hate this because people often build a persona, whether intentional or not, through online/texting, which can lead to a lot of frustration on both accounts when you realize you're not a good match in person.

Lastly, just because a girl seemingly takes interest in your life and texts you a lot, it doesn't actually mean she's attracted to you. Many girls are so addicted to their phone that they constantly need to be talking to people, even if they're not interested in them.

I would say something like "hey i'm free later this week, lets grab a drink", and if she says no and doesn't provide any alternatives, then next her.
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#3

Girl from cold approach not trusting you

I can't even get them to stop without them thinking I want to rape them.
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#4

Girl from cold approach not trusting you

With all the indoctrination that we are living in a rape culture, women are constantly on edge and tense.

Drop in an Indian accent.

Tension gone.
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#5

Girl from cold approach not trusting you

Quote: (12-12-2018 05:02 PM)TheLegendofBentCock Wrote:  

I can't even get them to stop without them thinking I want to rape them.

Don't bother with them either. Most psychologically healthy women don't think like this. It's only the radical feminists/gender studies types that fall for that. I've had plenty of women I met online or briefly through cold approach come straight to my place for the first date. Others have said they want to talk for weeks before meeting up, it's laughable. It's not like learning someones favorite food is going to make you any safer.
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#6

Girl from cold approach not trusting you

OP a girl that's "really" interested would want to push up a date...not back.

Whether she's interested in "you" or not doesn't mean she isn't perfectly willing to siphon off some attention and validation.

Remember: A girl's primary emotional "currency" is the warm fuzzies she gets from "exchanging" time for attention

In other words: just cause she'll suck your time doesn't mean she'll suck your dick.

Dont play that. Get to the date

_______________________________________
- Does She Have The "Happy Gene" ?
-Inversion Therapy
-Let's lead by example


"Leap, and the net will appear". John Burroughs

"The big question is whether you are going to be able to say a hearty yes to your adventure."
Joseph Campbell
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#7

Girl from cold approach not trusting you

Papaya and Batman, you guys are right. The reason i said she seemed very warm and interested was because SHE suggested the date after i cold approached her and got the number. She seemed unusually more interested than the rest of the girls i approach. Until the night before the date where she might have gotten cold feet and wanted to get to learn me better first. She did say she was busy with driving lessons and assignments and i don't think it's a lie since she's sending me snaps of her doing those things when we chat.

But i will take your advice and ask her to meet up tomorrow night (even though friday night young people have parties and go out with friends instead of go out on dates). If she can't but she proposes another date, i know she's still serious about this. But if she doesn't suggest anything i will probably next her.
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