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How to re-start my dating life

How to re-start my dating life

Greetings everybody, Im a new member, after watching a few videos on you tube I decided to join the forim( I also been reading the forum as a guest) and I did this first post to ask for help, Ill explain my situation:

Im a 38 years old hispanic man(so please sorry my english), I used to go out and have dates, (im tall ,face looks a little bit like Vince Vaughn, used to be in shape, but body currently looks like Hommer Simpson) anything Amazing but pretty much normal, I meet a girl when I was on the last years of college, since I was working too I used to miss classes from time to time, and she backed me up keeping me up to date on everything.
We became friends, I had a gf at the time, but after some time we broke and she was dating some one at the time so we dint see each other too often.

After a while we meet again and she told me that her bf threated her like shit, and I realized I was in love, so I convinced her to break with him , we start dateing and became an item, she was nice and a good gf, but some times she showed that she was a bit narcisistic, she started to do cosplay and stuff like that(she was good looking believe me and the sex was amazing).

After a few years we married,bought a home, I sold my car which was a personal project of mine( an old Ford Mustang) because car worked sometimes and others was on the garage for months i had a cpuple of loans which was like having a hand tied.

Anyway, I had a good salary,which allowed me to pay my bills and have a few luxuries here and there, I helped her to get better jobs, but after 2 years my dad died(most of my family died one by one in about 10 years) So I fell in a deep depression, she only wanted to goout and go shopping and just hang in malls, she got a job on a tv network as a recepcionist and her ego was HUGE after some time, she keep texting all the time!!!, trying to control my life even to the smallest details(;ile trying to beta me), never really caring for what I wanted or needed so we divorced, I gave her my part of the mortgage and just Left her, and she let me go, she started the divorce process within days!!!Anyway I lost my job by the same time, so It was very hard.
AnywayI dated her for a few years, were married for a few more, now most of my wingmen are married with children, I took a couple of years to pay my bills but In order to do that and recoverfinancially I had to move with my mom(thats what you domost of the time in Latin America).
Y paid all my debts, but at a cost, I worked so much I got out of shape, have an almost non existant social life, no car and living with my mom, the dating world has changed a lot since I quit dating, everybody is so into their cellphones, and their appearence that is awkward, besides Im not a good dancer (but a really entertaining speaker),In my contry due to the american influence on media has made the girls somewhat spoiled, but recently many colombians and venezuelan girls arrived since my country is (supposedly)doing well fiancially and theirs not.I have dated a couple of chicks in the last few years, 2 foreingers for casual relationships, and local divorced single mom, things is that most ven-col girls have the fame of being gold digers, and its kind of difficult to date a single mom, they want only serious business right away(And I dont want to go there again).
I loose some weight(almost 40 pounds) just walking(I live close tothe biggest park in the country) and jitting a boxing bagm but its getting difficult to lose more weight.
Ok so you have the full picture, I need an action plan,something to start with, I fill like Captain America after getting defrosted on the current era, please help, advice, tips anything that you may think will be useful to defrost the game and grease the wheels at least to begin baby steps.

How to re-start my dating life

Hello, welcome to RVF. Read this post below and check which parts of your game are strengths and which parts are weaknesses.

Quote: (09-21-2018 12:45 PM)kaotic Wrote:  

Quote: (09-21-2018 12:26 PM)maharajj Wrote:  

what does it mean when the RP community says accepting 'female nature' in regards to situations like these (skanking around, withholding truth, lying etc.)? How to accept? How to react?

This forum is more than just "Red Pill" the problem is many men who find it, overdose on the pill and turn "Black Pill" as in jaded, angry, and swear off women all together.

Accepting women for who they are, is simply that.

You accept that women are capable of some very shitty and slutty things, because they're women.

The problem is that men become neurotic with this thinking and every waking moment they think their women are doing something shady or fucking another guy.

It drives them crazy and insecure.

The way you react should be simple with terms to Inner Game:

-Love yourself
-Be happy without having women
-Understand that women complement your life, NOT complete your life
-Have a solid foundation of game
-Have a solid frame based on game and inner game
-Enjoy women for what they are
-Stop giving a fuck - this is at the top of the pyramid once you've managed the above.

You have to understand, women will do some sketchy things given the right circumstances, as in getting gang banged, cheating, dating multiple guys, having another mans baby outside of marriage, fucking for money, etc.

What you need to do is make sure you're optimizing everything you have looks, monetary, and social wise.

You should also be better at finding slut signs with women and especially if you're looking for a long term partner.


Yes, I can focus on improving myself and my life. But without kids, I think it will all be in vain. I can't control girls, so should I just get them when it's my turn (knowing their true nature, how can I start and maintain a family with them)?

Improving your self should be done REGARDLESS of if a women comes along or not.

Remember, women complement your life, they DO NOT complete your life.

If you're just fucking around, then yeah sure, it's not your pussy, it's just your turn, play the game, and have fun with them. Enjoy it while it lasts.

Having children with them is a whole different ball game.

You can go through life all paranoid and worried that the girl you're with is going to cheat on you.

OR how about this: Your girl should be worried that YOU'LL cheat on her and she'll the best she can to make sure she doesn't. (as in stays in shape and takes care of you)

Obviously when looking for the mother of your children you're going to need to vet carefully, and find the least amount of risk when having children with her.


Here's the steps you should take:

Inner game:
-Self Love
-Improving your confidece
-Working out
-Getting your money right

(This is your foundation, so you need to spend the most time building it up)

-Go on lots of dates
-Bang alot of women
-Maybe an LTR or two

(This is the frame on top of your foundation - going on dates and being with alot of women gives you a sturdy frame. This part is important because you understand how women work with your game. This is also shows you what women are capable of.)

Advanced Game/LTR/Wife Game:
-Being a pro at filtering potential sluts
-Being a pro at finding the exact women you want to have your kids
-Understanding how women are long term and to extremely vet them
-Managing risks associated with women in a LTR or marriage
-Having women chasing you in the relationship or chasing you to lock you down into one.

(This is the roofing and walls on the frame of your building on top of a strong foundation)

The furnishings inside are whatever you decide to put in or create, that's all from within you.

Here's some resources to make sure you're up to date with the current dating world. Since you've been reading the forum before joining, continue searching the forum for more topics that will help you understand more about the world of dating today.

That's all I can comment about your situation. Read the blue parts of the quoted post and check if any of them need some work.

How to re-start my dating life

Thanks for the help, I started reading and looks awesome!!!

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