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Borderline(BPD) women are good at seeing your flaws but incapable of seeing theirs
#1

Borderline(BPD) women are good at seeing your flaws but incapable of seeing theirs

(For anyone who has never heard of Borderline Personality Disorder, google it. Im sure almost all of you have banged someone like that before. Histrionic Personality Disorder is a close cousin.)

That's the weak point with which they always get me. The things they say about you, are often 100% correct assessments of you. So you're like, wow that's so insightful of you, thank you for making me aware of that.

But over time you realize that every conversation during a conflict seems to turn into everything being your fault, and that they do weird shit to provoke conflict and try to justify it as normal. The smarter borderlines will frequently do shit that's just at the line of violating a boundary, but never actually crosses the line.

If you try to mention how their behavior contributes to a situation, they throw a tantrum or will suddenly break up with you. If you don't fall for it and just let them leave, they will try to devalue you on their way out and will not rest until they get the "last word" in.

It's so confusing until you've met a few women with this pathology and see that they all behave the same to some degree. Some yell at you, some very calmly interrupt you and pick you apart, but the end result is always that you feel like it's all your fault and feel bad for even bringing up potential red flags.

For the first few weeks of her attempts to bring you down you may be able to keep her in check, but like waves hitting a rock, eventually she will tear you down.

Luckily I have friends, family and a therapist that can bring me back into reality. If I didn't have all that, man, those women would completely destroy me.

What I've noticed as well is that when you take a few days of not talking to them, suddenly you feel so much better and clearer in your head, and your peace returns.

Just got away from one of those chicks again. Man she was so goddamn sexy: 5'8, green eyes to go with her dark hair, natural perky double Ds, small waist, big ass, soft body, perfect skin, tight pussy, and high sex drive. But lots of red flags from the get go:
  • Dad died when she was 2.
  • Serial monogamist moving from one unhealthy relationship to the next from age 12 onwards. The relationships became shorter and shorter over time. First one 5 years, then 4 years, then three consecutive one-year relationships, then a 4 month relationship, then me for 6 weeks.
  • Got beaten around by 2 of her boyfriends.
  • Quit college to move to Spain for a guy she knew for a month.
  • Got pregnant by that guy she barely knew and aborted.
  • Doesn't have any friendships in her life that have been there longer than 1-2 years.
  • Broke.
  • Bad credit.
  • Has never gone to therapy, doesn't think she needs therapy
  • Her friends are a hot mess and don't have their lives together either.
She justified the red flags really well and you can't judge someone too harshly because of their past, so I thought to myself, let me treat her right and see how she behaves when she's in a relationship with me. But from the start I was aware of the potential for drama. And sure enough, it slowly came.

When I called her out on shit, she'd tell me that my problem is that I don't think positive enough and that I'm not over my ex. That's actually somewhat true, but she'd also do bizarre shit like have an ex from three years ago living at her house while she lives with her mom, but still pays his rent. Or going out to buy underwear with one of her male friends and rubbing it in my face trying to get a reaction. Or sending me videos of her dancing Salsa with other men. Or starting two hour fights with me because I'm not "supportive enough" of the situation with her ex living at her house. Or throwing tantrums when I want a few days to myself.

Man, fuck that bitch.
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#2

Borderline(BPD) women are good at seeing your flaws but incapable of seeing theirs

Dude, I feel for you. I have been with a suspected Borderline for a year and a half now. She's even physically assaulted me and yet I stayed. The final straw has been her meeting my mom while during a vacation to Europe. Once.my mother started calling her out on her shit, I realized I wasn't crazy.

I'm about to snatch the rug from under her soon though. I wish I knew earlier.
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#3

Borderline(BPD) women are good at seeing your flaws but incapable of seeing theirs

Quote: (08-20-2018 12:01 PM)hunger Wrote:  

She justified the red flags really well and you can't judge someone too harshly because of their past, so I thought to myself, let me treat her right and see how she behaves when she's in a relationship with me. But from the start I was aware of the potential for drama. And sure enough, it slowly came.

No, YOU justified the red flags because she was probably the hottest girl you've been with.

YOU decided to move forward with things.

YOU decided to put this girl on the pedestal.

She's literally the definition of a broken girl.

Fatherless, swings from dick to dick in LTR's, abused, had an abortion, no friends, poor, and her friends are like birds that flock together.


You were blinded by pussy and ignored ALL the red flags.

She literally hamstered it away and you bought it hook line and sinker thinking "oh this is different, I can understand why".

BULLSHIT, you can ABSOLUTELY judge someone on their past actions - they're bound to repeat them, unless they've made some major changes - which obviously she hasn't.

You got straight punked by this chick, she's dancing with other dudes, she's "shopping" for undies with a male orbiter.

She literally has an ex living at her house dude, I mean what more fucking red flag do you want?


At most, this chick should've been only a fun fuck and a plate, but you decided to lock this bitch down because you probably thought it's the hottest girl you can get.

You can point me at any hot girl and I'll point to a guy that was sick of her shit and dropped her ass.

I'm not trying to be harsh, but you've only yourself to blame for all the issues you're having.
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#4

Borderline(BPD) women are good at seeing your flaws but incapable of seeing theirs

Quote: (08-20-2018 12:01 PM)hunger Wrote:  

She justified the red flags really well and you can't judge someone too harshly because of their past, so I thought to myself, let me treat her right and see how she behaves when she's in a relationship with me.

You seem like a dude who would date a porn star because she has a great personality.

i've got a question, tho
How was the fucking ? Was it good or extraordinary ?

Tell them too much, they wouldn't understand; tell them what they know, they would yawn.
They have to move up by responding to challenges, not too easy not too hard, until they paused at what they always think is the end of the road for all time instead of a momentary break in an endless upward spiral
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#5

Borderline(BPD) women are good at seeing your flaws but incapable of seeing theirs

Yes, borderlines can be very perceptive but are incapable of taking responsibility due to severe emotional and/or physical instability in the home environment. She didn't trust her parents, but she needed their approval and presence. She was shamed and/or ignored, so she's intimately familiar with how that feels then avoids it like the plague as she gets older. But she's very adept at using shame and guilting you and others around her. She can't regulate her emotions as she didn't have a stable model while growing up and didn't feel safe at home. Your attempts to make her feel safe and valued feel like a trick to her - why would you want to love her when she knows she is wounded, damaged, and unworthy of love, trust, or admiration? The tendency of a man to white knight is the perfect recipe for getting a borderline to ghost or cheat on you. While she may understand how to help improve her situation and deal with her problems, she'll never follow through on a course of action. She depends upon attention (positive or negative). A borderline woman is 'Gone Girl' and 'Fatal Attraction.'

If immediately upon leaving a woman's company you feel a sense of relief in your body, but then you find yourself craving her later that day or a few days later you're probably dealing with a severely-personality disordered woman. The more intense the feeling of relief when you leave and the sharper the 'hit' when you reunite with her, the more greater the likelihood you're specifically dealing with a Borderline Personality Disordered woman. They count on you becoming addicted to their pussy, the drama, the need to 'fix' her, and then to pull you into the role of bad guy. Snare set and bear trap sprung.






On the Borderline - I like this guy's insights and perspectives. He speaks from experience with a borderline personality disordered ex-girlfriend.

RUN THE FUCK AWAY. Don't stick your dick into crazy. Just. Don't. Watch this video to help spot signs of borderline women:






But if you're like me and just couldn't resist the lure (a couple times) then good luck getting away with the least trauma to your soul as possible.





'You can spot a borderline from a mile away.' - Paul Elam

An excellent video (and entire series) from our own Davis Aurini, describing his own experiences (including a jail stay) dealing with a borderline:






'Borderlines bring you into the world of crazy.'

BPD women - just say no.

Any questions?

P.S. I recommend sessions with Dr. Tara Palmatier ('shrink4men.com' for men dealing with severely dysfunctional relationships. Dr. T has helped me gain perspective and validation as I've healed from various traumatic relationships. Often, it's unaddressed early childhood trauma that causes us to be attracted to BPD / cluster B / dysfunctional women. Get help.

Shrink4Men - Dr. Tara Palmatier
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#6

Borderline(BPD) women are good at seeing your flaws but incapable of seeing theirs

Wait... Truth Tiger guy are you Paul Elam?
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#7

Borderline(BPD) women are good at seeing your flaws but incapable of seeing theirs

Quote: (08-20-2018 05:40 PM)blck Wrote:  

Quote: (08-20-2018 12:01 PM)hunger Wrote:  

She justified the red flags really well and you can't judge someone too harshly because of their past, so I thought to myself, let me treat her right and see how she behaves when she's in a relationship with me.

You seem like a dude who would date a porn star because she has a great personality.

i've got a question, tho
How was the fucking ? Was it good or extraordinary ?

I love this breakdown of relationships w a BPD

https://heartiste.wordpress.com/2018/08/...dig-jerks/

Men have better sex with women who are emotionally unstable, a study has revealed.

And women prefer men who are less agreeable but pay attention to detail, according to the German survey of a thousand people.

They found “men whose partners had less emotional stability reported better sexual function” while “lower agreeableness of a sexual partner was predictive of better sexual function in women.”

From a Gabber,

Most men already knew this. The best sex you’ll ever have is with a woman who’ll stab you with a pair of scissors for liking another woman’s social media post.

Headcase women try a lot harder in bed because they love that feeling that their man might leave them at any moment. So Dread Game is useful in two ways: it keeps women attracted and faithful, and it heats up the bedroom. Of course, the downside is that you have to learn to deal with the blowback of continually provoking her to unlock ever-greater levels of achievement in girlcrazy.

The usual way these Manipulative Man-Crazy Girl relationships go is:

Hot sex => Surprise drama => Hotter sex => Manufactured drama => Soul-desiccating sex => Here comes the crazy train! => Stroke-inducing sex => Breakup.

Every one ends in a huge blowout-slash-blowjob because every man has his breaking point beyond which he can’t tolerate another bout of crazy from his girl. That breaking point is reached when the relief of getting away from the crazy is stronger than the regret of giving up the hot sex. For the options-rich alpha male, the breaking point is between three weeks and three months. For the options-starved beta male, the breaking point is between three years and early death.


The second part of that study — women have better sex with disagreeable men — recapitulates a rich Heartistian archive of personal anecdote and scientific confirmation of the CH maxim that chicks dig jerks. The man who locks a woman in (tethers her to his dick like ribbon to a may day pole) is the man who balances his charming and impeccably ambiguous emotional distance with his sensual expertise navigating a woman’s body.
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#8

Borderline(BPD) women are good at seeing your flaws but incapable of seeing theirs

^^ Let me share my experience on the subject:
More than 10years in a relationship with this kind of woman and I can tell you right now: All we did was Fight and Fuck, the harder the fight the better the fuck, for 10 fucking years.
Today without her, life is tasteless, OK I got a great wife, great kids but something is missing...
I hope everyone taste this, at least once, in their life.

Tell them too much, they wouldn't understand; tell them what they know, they would yawn.
They have to move up by responding to challenges, not too easy not too hard, until they paused at what they always think is the end of the road for all time instead of a momentary break in an endless upward spiral
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#9

Borderline(BPD) women are good at seeing your flaws but incapable of seeing theirs

She's just pulling your strings man, it's how manipulation works.

Right and wrong, True and False, they don't matter.

It's about "winning" the argument, or getting the result desired.

She probably knows she's being unreasonable, she just doesn't care.

Far from being mentality ill, her behavior is calculated, and is reinforced each time she succeeds.

Trust your gut instinct more often, I know you felt this girl was bad news earlier.

That feeling comes from millions of years of evolution.

Still, hot bitches are still hot, I get where you're coming from.
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#10

Borderline(BPD) women are good at seeing your flaws but incapable of seeing theirs

" the breaking point is between three years and early death."

This actually happened to me, and I still suffer the consequences to my physical health to this day. It's no joke. Turn around. Run, don't walk. Break all contact.

Ditto on what TruthTiger said about this blog:

http://shrink4men.com/services/

Really helped me begin to understand what I was actually being subjected to after the fact.
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#11

Borderline(BPD) women are good at seeing your flaws but incapable of seeing theirs

I've fucked at least 6. They only get bad I think once they know that you're attached and won't leave them. When they sense you can walk away they'll worship your cock IME. Almost got attached to one but not really.

Though they might be the type of girl to throw out false accusations so might be dangerous either way. Luckily nothing too traumatizing. Mine fucked my friends. I'm a whore anyways so good game.
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#12

Borderline(BPD) women are good at seeing your flaws but incapable of seeing theirs

I've had a similar LTR 5 years ago.
Me 20 and her 24.

What would I say?
She is almost completely aware of what she does.
Give her her own medicine.
Learn how she acts, her mindset, get her predictable.
Don't overrate her and
Enjoy the madness.

I remember when my ex-girlfriend used to start discussions just for unimportant things (I didn't know how to response "what do you like about me?" for example).
She would throw my cell phone to the floor, or pull my hair. I used to squeeze her hands, hug her from behind so she does not get out of control. A complete show on the streets. And then, she used to find the way to blame on me. When I was winning her with arguing logicaly, she did start to cry. Typical.

Well, she wasn't that hoe, like keeping ex's or whatever. But sometimes I miss something about that LTR: adrenaline.
After that, I didn't have desire of a new LTR for a long time.
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