rooshvforum.network is a fully functional forum: you can search, register, post new threads etc...
Old accounts are inaccessible: register a new one, or recover it when possible. x


Help - New country no social circle yet - The Struggles!
#1

Help - New country no social circle yet - The Struggles!

Hey all,

So I'm posting this and kind of hope for some responses to help me get my ass in gear.

Grew up in London but originate from Greece/Greek Island. I'm mid twenties, and I'd say good looking, 6ft 1 and in shape. I'm an athlete so my career so far has seen me spend time around the world including the US. US game was easy AF, basically just had to speak with an English accent and it was a done deal, especially college age chicks.

I'm on a Greek island (kind of, well Cyprus) now. I'm Greek so that's a plus because the hot locals generally stick to themselves, but I can only speak a little Greek, enough to understand most things but not to a hold a proper fluent conversation, so that's one obstacle. Another one if no fu*king social circle yet and I've been here six weeks. Here's an example of how much of a difference this makes, I was out in Greece three years ago and part of a team there. On the first day I met the whole team, and from then I always had a group of guys to have coffee with, go out with and introduce me to different girls. To break that barrier was so easy, because I had an instant circle of guys my age to introduce me to girls so the hard part was done.

Circumstances here mean I haven't got that group of guys from a team yet to hang out with. I'm injured so having private treatment. My social circle consists of my parents uncles and aunts in their 60's and some weird cousins! There's one guy at the gym I go to who would be a great guy to go out with because he's good looking, from the area and single, but he's pulling this thing about "work work work, focus and taking some time to relax from going out because he's had a crazy five years"...just my luck but to be fair he is always working long shifts.

It's summer here and the area I'm in doesn't have to many tourists mainly hot Greek locals around 18-30. Tinder game is dead, no locals on it. Most girls are always in a group of 3-6 girls in busy venues. I'm talking beach bars, beaches, coffee shops etc...I find it so uncomfortable trying to get involved in a group like that...I mean when I was in Greece I'd walk into a venue with a local guy from the team, he'd spot three or four girls that he knew, and we'd instantly sit down and that barrier was broken. No because of my shitty circumstances which means I haven't been able to join up with a team that easy intro hasn't been there which means I feel awkward going to busy places alone.

So I feel like my niche now is tourists, girls by themselves, day game i.e supermarkets, gym etc but I'm so pissed because this period would have been so much different had I had that massive advantage of an instant social circle. I guess I have to get comfortable being uncomfortable and can't have that advantage of having everything handed to me on a plate! I have my nice car here, I have a great top floor apartment overlooking the sea, it's just driving me crazy I'm not making the most of it and I've got myself stuck in a rut.

Basically looking for feedback, and advice on picking up girls in a new city/country when you are practically alone and how to break this barrier down. I think it's one of the harder places to do it, firstly because I'm into the local girls who are typically a little harder and more reserved like Italians, I can't speak the language fluently and I have no social circle. There also appears to be a high number of relationships here, a lot of local girls have boyfriends but I feel like you kind of need to get in there for when they break up because it seems like it's rare a hot/good looking girl here is single. I could head to Ayia Napa alone and pick up a party girl tourist probably every night of the week but I kind of want to do some proper dating with some local girls rather than just one nighters with a scruffy girl from England!
Reply
#2

Help - New country no social circle yet - The Struggles!

On the negative side, you are indeed in a place where social circle dominates when it comes to dating, same as in most southern countries. It's probably going to be tough to get dates out of cold approach, but not impossible.

It sounds though like it's a matter of time until you get into a social circle through your profession. Besides, aren't there any meetups going on that you could join?

As for the language part, Cyprus has a really high level of English as far as I know. I wouldn't be hesitant to use English for the approach and then at some point switch to the local language when things get more comfortable with the girl.

If it won't matter in 30 years, it doesn't matter now.

My thoughts and memoirs: yourfriendtrent.wordpress.com
Reply
#3

Help - New country no social circle yet - The Struggles!

Attractive women have never gone out alone. This problem was solved in the game community over 15 years ago. You need to learn (group) game.

Step 1 - open. Cold read, accusation, or opinion opener. Pick one. Examples;

"Ya'll look like trouble"
"hey guys, were going to have to ask you to leave. We've been getting too many complaints, you guys are out of control, the cops are already on their way."
"Check this out, my friends girlfriend is here without him and I just saw her making out with another girl. Is that cheating? Should I tell him?"

Step 2. Follow it up by making it personal.

"Actually, *you* look like a sweet heart but *you* are definitely trouble. I can tell you're a bad one. Youre a heart breaker. I bet you pull on guys heart strings like a puppet master for your own evil amusement."

Banter with an emotional charge like this for another 1 to 3 minutes. Once the set "opens" get logistics; Who are you with, where are you going later, what are you doing tomorrow, how are you getting home.

If logistics look good you can either stick with them or move onto the next set with plans to come back around to them later.

If they ask where are your friends you have a couple options.
"I don't have any friends"/deadpan
"They're meeting up with me later" (if you're cool, the girls won't bring it up again)
"You know I love my boys but do you ever feel like your friends hold you back? Never can decide where they want to go, so I said fuck it. (Shout out to westindianarchie)

This is only the tip of the iceberg but it should get you started

Or you can just find a dance club and learn how to dance and try and pull chicks that way.
Reply
#4

Help - New country no social circle yet - The Struggles!

By the way - when you first start opening groups you're going to feel weird. Humans ping off each other to alert them to danger.

If you're walking in the jungle and your buddy freezes with fear, without saying a word, a panic will run down your spine and youll freeze. It's built into all of us.

Back to game - if you walk up to a group a little afraid or feeling "weird" they will sense it and start to feel the same.

What this means is your first opens are not going to go well. It's not your haircut, it's not your clothes, it's not your big nose. Don't get discouraged. Face your fear, work thru it, and eventually it will go away after a couple weeks of approaching every night.

The best part is once you can walk up with no fear, no anxiety, but rather positivity, confidence, and joy (no homo lol) the girls will feel that and want to be around you because you're essentially giving them those feeling. Google the law of state transference. Good luck.
Reply
#5

Help - New country no social circle yet - The Struggles!

Quote: (08-17-2018 01:03 PM)Johnaldo10 Wrote:  

Hey all,

So I'm posting this and kind of hope for some responses to help me get my ass in gear.

Grew up in London but originate from Greece/Greek Island. I'm mid twenties, and I'd say good looking, 6ft 1 and in shape. I'm an athlete so my career so far has seen me spend time around the world including the US. US game was easy AF, basically just had to speak with an English accent and it was a done deal, especially college age chicks.

I'm on a Greek island (kind of, well Cyprus) now. I'm Greek so that's a plus because the hot locals generally stick to themselves, but I can only speak a little Greek, enough to understand most things but not to a hold a proper fluent conversation, so that's one obstacle. Another one if no fu*king social circle yet and I've been here six weeks. Here's an example of how much of a difference this makes, I was out in Greece three years ago and part of a team there. On the first day I met the whole team, and from then I always had a group of guys to have coffee with, go out with and introduce me to different girls. To break that barrier was so easy, because I had an instant circle of guys my age to introduce me to girls so the hard part was done.

Circumstances here mean I haven't got that group of guys from a team yet to hang out with. I'm injured so having private treatment. My social circle consists of my parents uncles and aunts in their 60's and some weird cousins! There's one guy at the gym I go to who would be a great guy to go out with because he's good looking, from the area and single, but he's pulling this thing about "work work work, focus and taking some time to relax from going out because he's had a crazy five years"...just my luck but to be fair he is always working long shifts.

It's summer here and the area I'm in doesn't have to many tourists mainly hot Greek locals around 18-30. Tinder game is dead, no locals on it. Most girls are always in a group of 3-6 girls in busy venues. I'm talking beach bars, beaches, coffee shops etc...I find it so uncomfortable trying to get involved in a group like that...I mean when I was in Greece I'd walk into a venue with a local guy from the team, he'd spot three or four girls that he knew, and we'd instantly sit down and that barrier was broken. No because of my shitty circumstances which means I haven't been able to join up with a team that easy intro hasn't been there which means I feel awkward going to busy places alone.

So I feel like my niche now is tourists, girls by themselves, day game i.e supermarkets, gym etc but I'm so pissed because this period would have been so much different had I had that massive advantage of an instant social circle. I guess I have to get comfortable being uncomfortable and can't have that advantage of having everything handed to me on a plate! I have my nice car here, I have a great top floor apartment overlooking the sea, it's just driving me crazy I'm not making the most of it and I've got myself stuck in a rut.

Basically looking for feedback, and advice on picking up girls in a new city/country when you are practically alone and how to break this barrier down. I think it's one of the harder places to do it, firstly because I'm into the local girls who are typically a little harder and more reserved like Italians, I can't speak the language fluently and I have no social circle. There also appears to be a high number of relationships here, a lot of local girls have boyfriends but I feel like you kind of need to get in there for when they break up because it seems like it's rare a hot/good looking girl here is single. I could head to Ayia Napa alone and pick up a party girl tourist probably every night of the week but I kind of want to do some proper dating with some local girls rather than just one nighters with a scruffy girl from England!

Are you a cypriot ?

First of all why are you obbsesed with local women?

IMO greek women are average or under average in terms of attractiveness.

Greek women from islands get even uglier and chubbier for some reason. Portuguese women are worse though

I am not saying for you to go after some drunk unwashed english girl, but your obsession is not so worthy.

I have not been in Cyprys myself, but my brother was.

He has light pigmentation and despite for not knowing anyone he managed to kiss a local on the 2nd day and despite not getting laid, he got a number from another local and will meet her again when he will go back this september, he was there for just 3 and a half days.

Also I don't understand the language issue, when english levels in Cyprus are high.


Maybe your looks, which might be pretty common in the island and your game is weak, are the factors which have not brought you much success.

Maybe you should change the way how you approach.

also in the end despite the efforts, it depends what is the population of the place you are staying.

If the population is small, than despite your efforts, it will be difficult to get any of the local women.

You have to change your game, or your target.
Reply
#6

Help - New country no social circle yet - The Struggles!

Vlado can you give us a breakdown of how to fix his weak game?

Also, give us a breakdown of your brothers game. We need to know how he managed to get a kiss and a phone number in only 3.5 days.
Reply
#7

Help - New country no social circle yet - The Struggles!

Where are you in Cyprus that doesn’t have any tourists in the summer?

Cyprus is a tourist island, there are tourists everywhere, also surely you can drive to one of the three main cities close by.

The difficulty of Cyprus/ Greece is severely underestimated on this forum. If there is a place opposite to the Philippines in this world it’s them. You have some good looking girls but getting them is another story as many have mentioned here.

On here you see a lot of people claiming bangs in Aya napa with tourists on a holiday trip but how many are in LTR with the local girls?

Greek culture is an inwardly oriented culture. Very different to the US, UK or Asia. You hardly see Greek girls dating outward, yet you see Asian girls actually hoping to date a foreigner. Having just came back from Greece, I saw tourists hanging out with tourists and Greeks with Greeks.

Regarding Cyprus, if you are in the resort area, a lot people like in the case of other Greek islands are only working there in the summer, so they don’t really have much attachment to the local community.

Also why are you there if there are no tourists and locals are all closed off? Can’t you move to a city on the island where there are tourists and it’s abit more lively?
Reply
#8

Help - New country no social circle yet - The Struggles!

Why not be a social facilitator/Hub ?
You create a dynamic of entering people's life, instead of being a social leech, making it easier for them to talk with you and to get contact through you.
That's somewhat better than clinging on people and trying to get validated.

Tell them too much, they wouldn't understand; tell them what they know, they would yawn.
They have to move up by responding to challenges, not too easy not too hard, until they paused at what they always think is the end of the road for all time instead of a momentary break in an endless upward spiral
Reply
#9

Help - New country no social circle yet - The Struggles!

Blck can you break down how to be the facilitator/hub? I see a lot of people telling the OP what he should be doing, not how he can do it.
Reply
#10

Help - New country no social circle yet - The Struggles!

OP do you have any more information on the place you're staying? How close is it to the nearest big city? Cyprus, but no tourists, how come? How long are you still going to be out with your injury?
Are you actively trying to improve your language skills or are you only going to be there for a short period of time anyway? Are there no events in your city or anyway near there?

You expressed your desire to get with a local girl, that would either mean speaking the language well or getting comfortable not speaking it well and gaming anyway.
Reply
#11

Help - New country no social circle yet - The Struggles!

Quote: (08-20-2018 08:46 AM)tr1cky Wrote:  

Blck can you break down how to be the facilitator/hub? I see a lot of people telling the OP what he should be doing, not how he can do it.

That's the problem, everybody tell what you should do but never How to do it

RSD will say it better than me, I got this from them but I add my special "get the fuck outta here" ingredient to their recipe, challenging everything they say just for the fun of it.





Tell them too much, they wouldn't understand; tell them what they know, they would yawn.
They have to move up by responding to challenges, not too easy not too hard, until they paused at what they always think is the end of the road for all time instead of a momentary break in an endless upward spiral
Reply


Forum Jump:


Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)