[Dulceácido]

(04-03-2018 06:32 PM)kaotic Wrote:  

@Dulce

That's fair, sound math, I get it.

But to me fresh out of a relationship, it's still better odds than 100% confirmed herpes.

**Fist bump**

[MongolianAbroad]

(04-03-2018 06:47 PM)PondScum Wrote:  

This thread is superb. Like, literally my fave herpes thread ever.

And investment bro is right, OP.
Ghosting someone who's done nothing wrong is trout or teenage behaviour, unworthy of a grown man.

I'm not calling you a pussy, that was your judgement: don't let it be true.

Be righteous.

This girl had herpes and slept with him without telling him about it. Bullshit she didn't know.

He doesn't owe her the time of day.

This is turning into white knight central.

I just hope he was up front with her about his own medical issues.

[Dulceácido]

(04-03-2018 06:32 PM)Lermontov Wrote:  

The situation described by the OP is actually a very common clinical problem.

For those who can't download the article that I mentioned, it presents the following clinical vignette before reviewing genital HSV infections:

''A 25-year-old woman visits her physician and reports three brief episodes of small, tender, labial ulcerations over the past year. The physical examination is unremarkable. Type-specific herpes simplex virus (HSV) serologic tests are positive for HSV type 1 (HSV-1) and type 2 (HSV-2). The patient is distressed to learn that she has genital herpes, particularly since she has been contemplating pregnancy. Her husband of 2 years reports no history of HSV infection; subsequent testing reveals that he is seropositive for HSV-1 and seronegative for HSV-2. How would you advise this couple?

...
...

''Conclusions and Recommendations
The woman in the vignette probably has genital herpes, as indicated by her history and positive HSV-2 serologic status. The duration and source of her HSV-2 infection cannot be determined, although her seronegative husband can be excluded as the source. She has noticed symptoms only within the past year; however, she could have been infected at any time since she became sexually active, since initial infection may be subclinical.

The frequency of recurrence of genital herpes is more consistent with HSV-2 than with HSV-1, but both are potential pathogens in this patient. Distinguishing between them would require further testing with the use of PCR or culture of lesions during an outbreak. The patient should receive counseling regarding the natural history of genital herpes, the risks of transmission, and the treatment options. All patients with a diagnosis of genital herpes should be offered comprehensive screening for other sexually transmitted diseases, including HIV.

To minimize the risk of transmission to her HSV-2–seronegative husband, this patient should be offered daily suppressive antiviral therapy. This therapy reduces the frequency of HSV-2 reactivation (symptomatic and asymptomatic) and reduces the risk of transmission by almost 50%. Her husband should use condoms, which will provide additional protection. The couple should avoid sexual contact while she has a symptomatic lesion. They should be informed that risk reduction provided by these interventions is not absolute, and transmission could still occur. If they decide to attempt conception, the patient should discuss her history of genital herpes with her obstetrician at the prenatal visit.''


Unlike the woman in the vignette, OP's girlfriend never had a recurrence. Maybe she has had a subclinical one and didn't notice. She might have a recurrence someday or just never have one. If she has one, takes medication and has protected sex (condom) with OP while the recurrence goes away, the odds of contracting HSV2 remain low. Notice in the clinical vignette how the husband has never contracted HSV2 in the two year relationship.

That being said, the rate of recurrences *usually* diminishes greatly as the years go on since the initial infection.

I personally wouldn't end a relationship because of my partner's HSV2 serologic status.

I started to explain all these things and more, but thought my scientific-babble would fall on deaf ears.

I'm not some person staring down my nose at people that didn't study the sciences, specifically biology, and even more specifically microbiology, no more than do I argue with a carpenter on how to remodel the deck behind my house, nor the concrete layer that's going to fashion my driveway.

I thought I'd get drug into a "worm hole" of scientific debate that many would not understand regardless of what I said.

Anyhow, I'm not rooting for the girl, nor would I blame TigerMandingo for his decision(s). It's his choice. I appreciate the candor of this forum. Let everyone decide for themselves, but at least offer alternative suggestions, especially in the case of evidence and never in the case of lack thereof.

That's as deep as I'll go into this anymore in the pubic forum. If anyone has any questions, insights, or would just like to speak more on the topic, you can PM me. This stuff fascinates me, so I'm down to talk about it at length.

Word.

[Lermontov]

For those who are intesrested in the subject, I'll finish with this fascinating study published again in the NEJM which is one of the most respected medical journal. Like the situation described by OP, this concerns couples where only one partner has HSV2 and the other doesn't have it (HSV2 discordant couples).

Once-Daily Valacyclovir to Reduce the Risk of Transmission of Genital Herpes
http://www.nejm.org/doi/10.1056/NEJMoa035144

Here is the abstract:

BACKGROUND
Nucleoside analogues against herpes simplex virus (HSV) have been shown to suppress shedding of HSV type 2 (HSV-2) on genital mucosal surfaces and may prevent sexual transmission of HSV.

METHODS
We followed 1484 immunocompetent, heterosexual, monogamous couples: one with clinically symptomatic genital HSV-2 and one susceptible to HSV-2. The partners with HSV-2 infection were randomly assigned to receive either 500 mg of valacyclovir once daily or placebo for eight months. The susceptible partner was evaluated monthly for clinical signs and symptoms of genital herpes. Source partners were followed for recurrences of genital herpes; 89 were enrolled in a substudy of HSV-2 mucosal shedding. Both partners were counseled on safer sex and were offered condoms at each visit. The predefined primary end point was the reduction in transmission of symptomatic genital herpes.

RESULTS
Clinically symptomatic HSV-2 infection developed in 4 of 743 susceptible partners who were given valacyclovir, as compared with 16 of 741 who were given placebo (hazard ratio, 0.25; 95 percent confidence interval, 0.08 to 0.75; P=0.008). Overall, acquisition of HSV-2 was observed in 14 of the susceptible partners who received valacyclovir (1.9 percent), as compared with 27 (3.6 percent) who received placebo (hazard ratio, 0.52; 95 percent confidence interval, 0.27 to 0.99; P=0.04). HSV DNA was detected in samples of genital secretions on 2.9 percent of the days among the HSV-2–infected (source) partners who received valacyclovir, as compared with 10.8 percent of the days among those who received placebo (P<0.001). The mean rates of recurrence were 0.11 per month and 0.40 per month, respectively (P<0.001).

CONCLUSIONS
Once-daily suppressive therapy with valacyclovir significantly reduces the risk of transmission of genital herpes among heterosexual, HSV-2–discordant couples.

*****
Nowadays, the option of suppressive therapy should be discussed with all patients who have genital herpes, even those who have relatively infrequent symptomatic recurrences.

Even without treatment, the odds of contracting HSV2 for the uninfected partner in the HSV2 discordant couples are relatively low as you can see. Importantly, note that OP's (now ex) girlfriend doesn't even have symptomatic genital herpes, so the odds of transmission would be even lower.

[PondScum]

@Spaniard88

Even assuming that she is a lying skeeze, it seems clear that OP doesn't see it that way (perhaps I'm mistaken) and has judged himself a pussy for not breaking up properly, which is really what I was getting at.

I wasn't suggesting he take her for lunch and offer to be BFFs. A phone call is enough. I don't think that's white knighting, but then again I am out of practice.

As for whether she knew or not, it's surely more likely that she did, or at least had cause to suspect it, but still not guaranteed. As I mentioned before, most people don't realise that a standard STD clinic test doesn't check for herpes, so it's possible she did suspect it in the past, have a check up, and think she was in the clear.

But I hear you. Overall, there's a solid chance she was a sociopath who wanted to infect OP and get commitment with a viral RNA ring on his other finger. If that's the case, I agree with you.

[Incubus]

@Dulceadio...37 women left over and 30 percent of them kicked men to the curb leaves 25 women unless I missed something. But I will try to get the 40 percent of women in there relationships to cheat...LMAO

The flip side is using the same numbers for 100 men (we too kick women to the curb). So statistically everybody will get HSV-2? sooner or later because the odds (from your numbers) in 2 clean women meeting the 2 clean men is at the lottery level.

A better number is below from the posted link

About 25% of women have genital herpes. That’s one in four.
About 20% of men have genital herpes. That’s one in five.

http://justherpes.com/facts/genital-herp...s-us-hsv2/

B.T.W if the above stats are true..then 75 percent of women don't have herpes. Many posters here are aware some people catch herpes and show no symptoms nor pass it on to their partner. It's the mental part that can be hard to deal with (and stigma) for certain people in a relationship (trust and respect)
.
There is also the sex which isn't spontaneous anymore. A checklist must be followed

Another question is how many virus's do people want to carry around I'm drawing the line at Human Papilloma Virus which I think we all have (but the government wants to inoculate young girls against...is Micheal Douglas throat cancer from it?...maybe,,,but why all the hysteria for a common virus)

Amazingly what is forgotten is some people get outbreaks (4 times a year from the link) This poster may hit the Herpe jackpot and get those 4 out breaks...nobody knows this not even him.

If one partner doesn't have HSV-2 then it's up to the other partner to work with him/her on dealing with it ....for the betterment of the relationship in the future because this disease is life long....is my point.

[lex the impaler]

(04-03-2018 05:40 PM)TigerMandingo Wrote:  

(04-03-2018 03:56 PM)Trent W. Wrote:  

Is it possible that deep down you had already decided to break it with her and simply asked for opinions in order to rationalize it?

Nope, not at all. I was enjoying the relationship and we were talking about moving in etc. Things went fast, what can I say. We had great chemistry and I never got a sixth sense about her (that she was lying or being manipulative). I'm not as cynical about women as some other guys on this forum. If a girl is good to me, I reciprocate. It's just that this one episode left a bad taste in my mouth, and I don't think I can just say "fuck it, it's just the herp, life goes on". Respect to the guys who can let it go and be supportive.

And you almost committed to a girl with known case of the herp..... I think you dodged the proverbial bullet here...

[Bienvenuto]

(04-03-2018 08:52 PM)lex the impaler Wrote:  

(04-03-2018 05:40 PM)TigerMandingo Wrote:  

(04-03-2018 03:56 PM)Trent W. Wrote:  

Is it possible that deep down you had already decided to break it with her and simply asked for opinions in order to rationalize it?

Nope, not at all. I was enjoying the relationship and we were talking about moving in etc. Things went fast, what can I say. We had great chemistry and I never got a sixth sense about her (that she was lying or being manipulative). I'm not as cynical about women as some other guys on this forum. If a girl is good to me, I reciprocate. It's just that this one episode left a bad taste in my mouth, and I don't think I can just say "fuck it, it's just the herp, life goes on". Respect to the guys who can let it go and be supportive.

And you almost committed to a girl with known case of the herp..... I think you dodged the proverbial bullet here...

Take the STDs out of this for a second.

Talking about moving in with a woman after two months of seeing her.
That's very fast.

My mate moved in with his squeeze after just six months. WAAAAY too soon.

Then she baby-trapped him.

Now he works all the hours to support her kid (not his) plus her (she just doesn't work) and his newborn.

Taking the herpes out of it, I think that there is something to be questioned in talking about moving in / getting serious about a girl OP has just started dating after a big break up.

Maybe not. Maybe it was all fine.

In terms of abundance mentality, though, this news has given OP a chance to play the field more and see whats out there.

[MongolianAbroad]

2030 RooshV Forum Thread Title:

"Found out my new gf has AIDS. Should I stay?"

Super Players are first to the party, arguing for staying: "It's just "the hiv," man, don't be a pussy, man up! All true Super Players have "the hiv!""

The scientists then come out in force: "Well is it "the hiv," or full blown AIDS? Since 30% of the population have it, if you found a nice girl, bang away, you're probably going to get it anyways. These are the cold, hard facts."

The "wrap it up" crew jumps in next with: "Use two condoms, dental dams, and a female condom, and only have anal every couple of days, to avoid tearing."

The "don't stick your dick in crazy" crew makes an appearance with: "Are you cray-cray? That's your health, man! Never bang crazy!"

The "believe anything" crew finally finds out what's going on and contributes: "She's probably a good girl, maybe she lost her virginity to someone with AIDS and only had sex once before you met her...give her a chance."

The "sex before marriage is a sin" crew gets wind of the thread and chimes in with: "In the good old days, fornicators used to be stoned to death..."

The "if it ain't white, it ain't right" crew makes an entrance with: "Is she a blue eyed blonde? Yes? Bang away then, she can do no wrong, make some blue eyed blonde AIDS babies."

Then forum moderation, Samseau AI 3.0 by then, jumps in with "This shouldn't have been a new thread. According to my calculations, this should have been archived under this early 2018 thread: thread-67770.html"

Thread Locked.

[General Stalin]

Most people have herpes. Something like 3 in 5 people, and HSV1 and HSV2 are essentially the exact same virus just one usually affects the mouth area and the other one usually affects the genital area.

I honestly wouldn't worry about it.

[speculator]

The only statistic I care about is that 99.99% of broads will dump your miserable ass after you pronounce the word "herpes". The "fairer sex" doesn't bother itself with statistical masturbation like the one we see on this thread.

As far as science is concerned, how were those samples chosen? I am sure sexually promiscuous people are far more likely to participate in this kind of studies. This is similar to average dick size measurement studies or US presidential election polls. All of them are wrong.

[blck]

(04-04-2018 02:47 AM)speculator Wrote:  

The only statistic I care about is that 99.99% of broads will dump your miserable ass after you pronounce the word "herpes". The "fairer sex" doesn't bother itself with statistical masturbation like the one we see on this thread.

As far as science is concerned, how were those samples chosen? I am sure sexually promiscuous people are far more likely to participate in this kind of studies. This is similar to average dick size measurement studies or US presidential election polls. All of them are wrong.

The truth has been told, please OP don't become an involuntary meme for dating STD ridden women :



Women will dump Men for being sterile or having the risk to contract a STD faster than light but will go nuts if you suggest doing the same with them.

For the story, I've seen it done to a colleague thinking he was the one sterile, he barely convinced her to get tested to see if something was possible even if before finding that she was her who was unable to have baby.
When he dumped her she sent a mail to the company mailing list describing how she has been patient with him but how he dumped her right away after all she did for him, since then he has been the monster who dumped his gf because she could not have babies.
Shook his hand proudly everyday since.

[Ice Man]

You are not a true SuperPlayerPlus™ unless you have HSV-7 + CancerAids

I have been with a fair few ladies in my time and I do not have penis herpes- it is neither inevitable nor universal, contrary to some claims here, and choosing to avoid it if you can is certainly a very reasonable thing to do.

Implying it is somehow "beta" to not want penis herpes must either be sarcasm or autism.

[J.R. '67]

(03-31-2018 12:07 AM)TigerMandingo Wrote:  

Everything came back negative except I have HSV-1 and hers came back positive for HSV-2

you should’ve kept her around and taken a shot at the HSV Trifecta

[Vill@in]

(04-03-2018 06:53 PM)Spaniard88 Wrote:  

This is turning into white knight central.

You can say that again. Amazing how that shit spreads like fucking wild fire. This forum should be immune to everyday betaization that happens in real life but it seems to bleed over into here more and more each day.

Have we forgotten that women lie? I'd be willing to bet that the story she told the OP was either a complete lie or a semi-twisted version of the truth. When did we come to a point where we are taking a woman for her word? Their version of the truth is something that will benefit them.

Anyway...it is 100% confirmed that this chick has herpes. There is no doubt. So now, with knowing that information, you're still going to put yourself at risk? Why? Do you like having oozing open sores on your dick? If so, more power to you. I'm good on that shit though.

"But the statistics show that most women have it! Chances are you've already slept with a girl who has it!" Yeah, that may be true but it's not 100% confirmed she does. I'll take the 80% she has it over the 100% without a doubt she has it, every fucking time.

Don't settle for less. Don't settle for girls with known STD's. Don't settle for girls who chew with their mouth open. Don't settle for whores.

You're worth more than that.

[yankeetravels]

Maybe I'm being naive, but I don't think I'd break up with someone who had herpes unless it happened mid-relationship. Half of all people have herpes. Seriously, we live in an era where we have antibiotics to fight off almost all STDs. Hell AIDS used to be deadly and now no one really peeps much about it. That's about the only thing I'd say you REALLY don't want to get. The point I'm making is it's not ideal to get herpes, but is it the end of the world? No.

[Defqon]

Herpes is no big deal , it's just minor inconvenience. I have got it on my finger , when I was fingering a chick that I have pulled from the bar (had a cut on the finger a 2 days before on it , not completeley healed). You can get it anywhere on your body. Herpes is even common on fighters on their bodies. Here in Europe most of the people have cold sores on their lips , no one takes them seriously like it's a big deal.

[kaotic]

(04-04-2018 05:19 AM)blck Wrote:  

(04-04-2018 02:47 AM)speculator Wrote:  

The only statistic I care about is that 99.99% of broads will dump your miserable ass after you pronounce the word "herpes". The "fairer sex" doesn't bother itself with statistical masturbation like the one we see on this thread.

THIS.

Dudes on here hamstering "brahs it's no big deal"

Okay, you go bang a girl with confirmed herpes, then dump her, then go and game other girls and right before you bang, you tell them "hey I have herpes, it's no big deal right?"



Up next on RVF: "How to game girls when your herpes flare up"

But seriously, you guys don't think it'll dry up a girls pussy right quick when you say that to her in bed? Or do you just omit that fact?

The point is, guys need to think bigger picture than the girl who has herpes in front of her.

I haven't seen a male hamster this big in awhile.

[True Balla]

Im pretty curious, to those players that actually have Herpes, do you tell the girls? I'm assuming you all probably don't have sex with them if you have a outbreak, but do you ever tell them? How about for a LTR?

[PapayaTapper]

(04-04-2018 11:31 AM)kaotic Wrote:  

(04-04-2018 05:19 AM)blck Wrote:  

(04-04-2018 02:47 AM)speculator Wrote:  

The only statistic I care about is that 99.99% of broads will dump your miserable ass after you pronounce the word "herpes". The "fairer sex" doesn't bother itself with statistical masturbation like the one we see on this thread.

THIS.

Dudes on here hamstering "brahs it's no big deal"

Okay, you go bang a girl with confirmed herpes, then dump her, then go and game other girls and right before you bang, you tell them "hey I have herpes, it's no big deal right?"

Up next on RVF: "How to game girls when your herpes flare up"

But seriously, you guys don't think it'll dry up a girls pussy right quick when you say that to her in bed? Or do you just omit that fact?

The point is, guys need to think bigger picture than the girl who has herpes in front of her.

I haven't seen a male hamster this big in awhile.

I like to whisper "I have AIDS" in her ear at just the right moment then see if I can hang on for 8 seconds

[polar]

(04-04-2018 08:33 AM)J.R. 67 Wrote:  

(03-31-2018 12:07 AM)TigerMandingo Wrote:  

Everything came back negative except I have HSV-1 and hers came back positive for HSV-2

you should’ve kept her around and taken a shot at the HSV Trifecta

^ FearLess RawDoggers™

Also relevant:

[dosequis]

(04-03-2018 06:37 AM)Alpha Wrote:  

As far as her getting it from slutty behavior or just being unlucky, ask her what her notch count is and then multiply that number by 3, and you'll get her real notch count.

You're living in the past. That rule came about in the late 90's when the first American Pie movie came about. Today you gotta multiply by 8.

[Supreme4ever]

There is no way I would deal with a girl that knowingly has herpes. The burning itching, people say it feels like fire to piss, the cost of medication to prevent flare-ups, the stigma of having a lifelong STD for any future relationship. No one's perfect but the goal is to try to be your best. Herpes is like being a leper in our generation. Leave run move but don't get trapped for life.

[WombRaider]

I can't say what OP should have done, but I don't necessarily doubt the girl's story. Up to 90 percent of people who have the virus never have any symptoms, or the symptoms are so mild they don't notice. In other words, most people who have it, have no idea they have it. Statistically, it's very likely she didn't know.

My question would be why were they getting tested for herpes in the first place? Who suggested it? As far as I know, that's not part of a standard STD panel. Doctors will only test you if you specifically ask to be tested.

[quaker13]

How both men and women react to the notion of herpes is completely childish. Herpes is literally the most harmless std in existence and way more people have than any of us will ever know. Stop being babies. I have a married friend with herpes and he's been with his wife for over 10 years and she hasn't contracted it. That said, half the respondents on this thread probably have it. It's not a big deal, hell STDs in western society in general arent a big deal. American have such a childish view about STDs.