[HankMoody]

First, off, hobbies don't necessarily attract women right off the bat. If you meet a woman at the bar, a club, or even during day game, talking about how you put a dude twice your size into a submission hold or hiked Mount Everest isn't going to generate all that much attraction. What they're looking for at first is your height, fitness level, style, body language, eye contact, etc. Physical attraction is first and foremost.

Second, once a woman is hooked, you can literally tell her that your favorite hobby in the world is catching Pokemon, and the next week she'll have Pokemon Go installed on her phone, texting you about all the Pikachus she caught at work. Most women don't have strong identities, so often they're looking to latch onto yours. This is a good thing - women are attracted to strong men. Being a strong man means having a sense of purpose and identity.

How women interpret your hobbies depends on how much she likes you. So, if you're going to engage in a hobby, do it for yourself not to pickup women.

All that aside, there are some hobbies that get ginas tingling, some hobbies that women don't care about, and some hobbies that will downright turn them off.

My observations...

Masculine Hobbies

Masculine hobbies are fun and they turn hookups into LTRs and girls who just can't get enough of you...

In no particular order, this is what I've found women find attractive: off-roading, traveling, martial arts (not karate, kung fu, or cardio kickboxing. I'm talking Muay Thai kickboxing, boxing, Jiu Jitsu, or anything that actually involves sparring / hitting a heavy bag), bodybuilding, swimming, sports (almost any sport; I've seen cricket players bring hot chicks to their matches. Even golf will work if you're decent. One of my favorite dates is the batting cages because I can hit a baseball), hiking, camping, cooking (not pastries), painting, working on cars, cigars, cycling (not in a gym), tattoos, preaching, music (both playing and knowing about good music - not "I listen to the radio"), high end stereo systems in both your house and car, motorcycles, woodworking, hunting, fishing, kayaking, sculpting, local professional sports (provided you watch them with her, or at least accommodate her team), big dogs (women love big dogs, and men who have big dogs), pool (if you're good), guns (every woman I've taken to the range I ended up banging without fail), Crossfit, skiing, snowboarding, etc.

This list is non-extensive and just to give you ideas.

Basically, anything that is dangerous, active, or traditionally masculine they find attractive. It doesn't matter what women say, at the end of the day they're attracted to "real men".

That said, you have to do these things because you enjoy them - not to impress girls. The key is to either let her watch you do it, or do them with her. Take her to a local sports game, a camping trip, or tell her to come hang out in the garage and drink a beer while you fix up the car and smoke a cigar. I wrote the other thread about "gym dates" - same concept applies. Do something you enjoy, that you're good at, and sometimes do it with her. This is how you take a hookup into a mini-LTR or long term girlfriend. She'll be hooked in no time.

Finally, make sure to be good at these hobbies. If you take her camping, know how to start a fire, pitch a tent, cook over an open fire, and how to follow trail blazes. If she's going to watch you spar at Jiu Jitsu, don't get submitted in the first 5 seconds. If you're going to lift together, be able to bench more than 135, etc. You can do all this stuff without her, and it's fun in its own right.

I try and keep most of my hobbies to this kind of stuff.

Hobbies that are Neutral

Key point - women do not want to date their "best friend" or even someone they have a lot in common with. A lot of the women I've banged this year were liberals, thought camping would be "gross", and the thought of going to church was foreign.

Within a few months, they're suddenly open to Trump, camping "was like SO FUN!!!", and they're asking me to take them to church. They were turned on how by how different I am than most of the men they meet online, and how pigheadedly dedicated I am about my hobbies, lifestyle, and person. I know exactly who I am, what I want, and I will change for no woman. They can change for me.

That aside, this is the stuff that I enjoy doing that doesn't necessarily add any attraction to a relationship, but sometimes they'll want to know more...

Reading (mostly philosophy, theology, and history), writing (I write a very popular blog that some women read and others don't care about), wine, art history, plays / opera / musicals / jazz performances (some love going, some hate it), restaurants (it does score you points to know all the cool fun places to go), politics (most women only care about abortion, Planned Parenthood, and "TRUMP IS EVIL!!!", but sometimes you can engage them on a higher level), religion (this grows on women when you're in an LTR, though. They usually think it's weird at first, but then they come to respect it, and even want to be part of it), your job (what I do is too complicated to explain to them), fantasy sports, poker, running (they don't care how far you can run, and most like beefier guys anyway), computers, gardening, yoga (if done right, yoga is actually a good place to meet women and a fine activity, especially for fighters), photography (can sometimes be moved into the "sexy" category if you're really good at it, and do it in dangerous spots), real estate / investing, etc.

These are all great things. However, hobbies that are intellectually stimulating do not generate or maintain attraction - even if she's into the same stuff.

Often you'll meet a girl who is a bookworm and loves jazz, yet she's banging the bartender who hasn't read a book since he dropped out of high school.

Opposites do attract.

Having hobbies in common with women doesn't mean they will be attracted to you. If anything, most of them want to be exposed to something new and different. The Democrat atheist female often finds herself attracted to the jacked Trump supporter who goes to church every Sunday.

My advice? Do what you like. Don't try and find stuff in common with women.

Hobbies That Turn Women Off

This morning I was at the gym with a new plate. We lifted weights together, I showed her how to use the machines, and then we played competitive racquetball. After, we went back to my house and I cooked brunch - French omelette with peppers and artichoke hearts (garnished with tarragon), and diced Asian pears. Simple meal, but tasted great. (Read "The 4 Hour Chef" by Tim Ferriss and you'll be pretty competent in the kitchen quickly. One of the best books I've ever read.)

She was sort of complaining about her ex-boyfriend. "He seemed really good on paper, had a good job, but all he wanted to do was play video games. He never left the house, he couldn't cook, and I swear the guy would die if you left him out in the woods for more than 5 hours. I had so much fun today biking to the gym, working out, and cooking. Today was totally awesome!" I know she's hooked.

Case in point, hobbies that are active turn women on.

These are the hobbies that turn women off:

Video games (the exception being sports games with friends or Wii games that you can play with her), stamp / coin collecting, posting on forums (I would never tell women that I post here, ever), anime, comic books, LARP, movies / TV shows (talking about these things makes you her bestie, not her lover), anything traditionally feminine (knitting, baking pastries / cakes, skinny jeans, etc. No matter how progressive she is, in her mind she's thinking "What a fag. I need a real man"), sending long "well thought out" text messages all fucking day and night, talking to her about internet drama on a forum, small dogs / gerbils / hamsters, eating at really pedestrian restaurants like Olive Garden / TGI Friday (if you're poor, just go to an ethnic place that is a BYO), complaining about your depression / health issues / anything (unless it's "my shoulder is still all fucked up from sparring last week" or "my legs are still rubber from all that squatting". Otherwise, save that shit for your male friends, pastor, or therapist), not having male friends, talking about how "dumb" sports / jocks are (that just means you're a loser and jealous of people who are athletic), talking about your feelings, My Little Pony / Power Puff Girls, etc. (dude...), anything that is "computer geek" or "nerd humor" (just keep it to yourself), etc.

Basically, anything that implies you're trying to escape the real world, rather than live in it, turns women off. It's one thing to read a good book, it's another thing to sit on your couch and play video games every single night.

In addition, anything that is traditionally feminine also turns women off, because they're looking for "real men", not "boys" and most certainly not closeted fags. I got a nice compliment today - "You're one of the most masculine males I've ever met." "Oh yeah? I'm only 5'5." "For some reason, you're not short in my mind."

Finally, anything that implies you're weak and/or un-athletic. Those guys from The Big Bang Theory would never get laid in real life, except by morbidly obese chicks. Sorry.

Candidly, I play video games. I love Final Fantasy and other RPGs, but I don't talk about video games with women or ever let them see me playing them. A few weeks ago a woman was in my bedroom and was like "You have a Playstation? You don't strike me as the video game type." I responded "I just play sports games" (not true).

If you like these things, do them. I like many of them, just understand that telling a girl that you've leveled Cloud Strife up to level 99 and gotten all the limit breaks will turn a woman off early into the relationship. Once she's hooked, you can say whatever the fuck you want.

Also, if you're going to engage in "dorky" hobbies, make sure to do at least a few masculine ones. Go spar for a few hours and then unwind with a glass of wine and Playstation. You want her to think you can hold your own in a fight, fix a flat tire, and survive in the woods for a few days. Once that's established, fire up the Playstation and pour a glass of wine.

Feel free to chime in, hombres...

[the1element]

I like this post mate.

Completely agree with the video games and un-attractive hobbies.

I was surprised to see pool listed as an "attractive hobby", I can come close to running table (regulation table, not bar table) and I've never seen a girl really get turned on or tell me they think its attractive.

But, I do like placing bets with girls when we play pool.

"If I can sink 7 balls in a row, you owe me a blowjob."

Of course they don't think I can do it...little do they know I've played in a lot of leagues haha.

Plus it's fun to make fun of girls when they play pool

"Get lower onto the shot"

"Stick your butt out more"

"tell her to come hang out in the garage and drink a beer while you fix up the car and smoke a cigar"

I really like that idea, I'm going to try that next time I need to work on my car.

I've got a date on Wednesday, I have to take some photos of a waterfall for a blog and I told her to come along with me.

I usually do drink dates (grab drinks) but I'm finding these hobby dates much more interesting and fun. Plus it's something I was already going to do so it's no big deal if she flakes.

Like I said, good post.

To add: The only really dork hobby I have is fountain pens and that's mainly because I'm a writer and I like a nice pen. Girls find it strange I'm willing to drop a Benjamin on a pen.

[Steelex]

Great post.

First and foremost, women like passion and drive. Probably because they have next to zero testosterone, which is the secret sauce for passion. The hobby is the extension of that passion and drive, the vehicle through which it is expressed.

If you break it down real good, they just like intense masculine energy.

[kbell]

I need more hobbies like that. I do art cooking and fitness as my primary hobbies. If I start sketching publically people want me to sketch them. Just started dance class, fun. Shooting, fishing and hunting sound fun.

[torridon747]

Agree with most your points with the exception of the implication that you should hide your less masculine hobbies even if it's something you're passionate about.

Fuck that. I like Anime, I play every new fallout and Far Cry, I and play chess every day to keep sharp and once in a while if I get a wild hair up my ass I bake a mean pecan pie. I have done every single one of those activities with a girl I'm banging and even if it turned them off of me (it didnt) I would do it again. Because I wanted to do it, I didn't and still don't care if a woman finds those things unattractive. I don't live to please women. Now I've also taken girls shooting, showed them secret hiking spots, taught them how to drive a stick and cut down a Christmas Tree etc etc but again those were things I wanted to do as well. Which is something you mention several times in your post, do stuff because you want to.

I think the most important thing is to maintain a masculine frame. I don't think it matters what you do. I'm not trying to attack you and I have no doubt you slay HankMoody but this post seems a little off center if you're telling people to do what they're into not because women like them but then repping hiding things you do like from them because they would want you to. I understand this advice may be aimed at the greener players here and I think the foundation of what you're saying is sound but you should offer up some nuances to your ideas so nobody gets any strange ideas about frame.

Edit:

Reread your post again, missed the part about "once they're hooked you can say whatever you want". Excuse my criticism, this was clearly aimed at the initial attraction phase.

[HankMoody]

(02-11-2018 10:51 PM)Eugenics Wrote:  

Agree with most your points with the exception of the implication that you should hide your less masculine hobbies even if it's something you're passionate about.

Fuck that. I like Anime, I play every new fallout and Far Cry, I and play chess every day to keep sharp and once in a while if I get a wild hair up my ass I bake a mean pecan pie. I have done every single one of those activities with a girl I'm banging and even if it turned them off of me (it didnt) I would do it again. Because I wanted to do it, I didn't and still don't care if a woman finds those things unattractive. I don't live to please women. Now I've also taken girls shooting, showed them secret hiking spots, taught them how to drive a stick and cut down a Christmas Tree etc etc but again those were things I wanted to do as well. Which is something you mention several times in your post, do stuff because you want to.

I think the most important thing is to maintain a masculine frame. I don't think it matters what you do. I'm not trying to attack you and I have no doubt you slay HankMoody but this post seems a little off center if you're telling people to do what they're into not because women like them but then repping hiding things you do like from them because they would want you to. I understand this advice may be aimed at the greener players here and I think the foundation of what you're saying is sound but you should offer up some nuances to your ideas so nobody gets any strange ideas about frame.

Edit:

Reread your post again, missed the part about "once they're hooked you can say whatever you want". Excuse my criticism, this was clearly aimed at the initial attraction phase.

Once a woman is into you, you can do whatever you want openly. You can play Pokemon Go, have a million comic books, and a CD collection of Michael Bolton and Yanni. They won't care.

However, you don't want her disqualifying you on the first, second, or third date.

This is what you're trying to avoid -

"I met this guy, he seemed really cool, but then all he talked about was comic books and anime."

Women are quick to disqualify you for dumb shit in the beginning. Once you've banged, they're slow to let go.

Shit, once a woman is hooked, it's like this:

"Can I come over?"
"eh tonight isn't good for me im about to beat metal gear solid 3..."
"But you've already beaten that game!"
"ya but im about to beat it again"

[Leonard D Neubache]

I once had a modest collection of bladed weapons but I was perpetually renting so I never brought them out of storage and mounted them or anything like that.

This thread has made me wonder whether something like that would have been a moistening or a drying agent.

[Rhyme or Reason]

I made a similar thread where people called me "negative" and "defeatist" for pointing out the obvious fact that some hobbies dry up the poosy. Someone there even said that anime is good for getting chicks because 'cosplayers' which is just fucking absurd.

Steelex summed it up here:

Quote:

If you break it down real good, they just like intense masculine energy.

So there you go...if the hobby involves that, it's likely to get it wet.

[Montrose]

You should just have hobbies that fit your style and which you can talk about without boring the girl to death. If you’re an athlete you’ll meet girls who like athletes - good for you. Personally as an older French playboy I prefer to talk about opera and poetry, subjects on which I happen to be knowledgeable and entertaining, than about my lousy 220 deadlift. Also I tend to go for Art and Fashion Design students who are actually interested in art stuff and like to talk about it. Not to mention that lifting is often frowned upon in Europe, as it sounds vain and superficial. And people say it’s boring.

But I agree that some hobbies are a turn off, and I rarely mention my huge collection of boardgames. I once got my date to play a boardgame with me though.

[britchard]

(02-12-2018 12:40 AM)Montrose Wrote:  

You should just have hobbies that fit your style and which you can talk about without boring the girl to death. If you’re an athlete you’ll meet girls who like athletes - good for you. Personally as an older French playboy I prefer to talk about opera and poetry, subjects on which I happen to be knowledgeable and entertaining, than about my lousy 220 deadlift. Also I tend to go for Art and Fashion Design students who are actually interested in art stuff and like to talk about it. Not to mention that lifting is often frowned upon in Europe, as it sounds vain and superficial. And people say it’s boring.

But I agree that some hobbies are a turn off, and I rarely mention my huge collection of boardgames. I once got my date to play a boardgame with me though.

As a side note, be thankful that lifting is frowned upon in Europe.

It is so fucking annoying listening to wannabes talking about 'leg day today, going to fucking die eurghhhh'. In my whole life I've spent less than 100 quid on gym memberships or equipment, these guys are blowing 30 quid a month and buy supplements, yet they're smaller than me. It's self masturbatory shite that I wish didn't exist. And yes it's really not that hard to talk about it.

On the topic of the OP, I pretty much agree all round. One thing I think you may have left out though is speaking foreign languages, which not only opens new pathways with foreign chicks but impresses almost all English speaking ones as well, particularly if it's what they perceive as a cool language to speak.

I've always got a kick out of saying some outright degrading shit when a chick asks me to say something in a language they don't speak.

[Kahler]

I second that once she's hooked she won't care. I even got my LTR to play Skyrim, and this is game for pure basement dwelling autists (it's funny because few years ago I would kill for "nerdy girl", now I'm thinking that maybe I shouldn't expose her to video games for obvious reasons).

(02-12-2018 12:40 AM)Montrose Wrote:  

You should just have hobbies that fit your style and which you can talk about without boring the girl to death. If you’re an athlete you’ll meet girls who like athletes - good for you. Personally as an older French playboy I prefer to talk about opera and poetry, subjects on which I happen to be knowledgeable and entertaining, than about my lousy 220 deadlift. Also I tend to go for Art and Fashion Design students who are actually interested in art stuff and like to talk about it. Not to mention that lifting is often frowned upon in Europe, as it sounds vain and superficial. And people say it’s boring.

But I agree that some hobbies are a turn off, and I rarely mention my huge collection of boardgames. I once got my date to play a boardgame with me though.

Frowning depends on country I think. I believe in France lifting isn't very popular - when I was in Paris it struck me how scarce gyms/sport shops etc. are there. And who would have time to train with all this sitting in bistro every day, drinking and smoking?
On the other hand, Poland definitely has big fit culture. In Britain sports are also part of culture, especially in universities.

[IntrovertSigma]

Hank touches on this but I think it's important to be clear about it. People need to take their overall persona, look or archetype into account.

If you are overweight or super skinny you can't really afford to fit a certain stereotype ie gamer, feminist-vegan, etc.

If you look like you fit some strong masculine archetype then you have more leeway to reveal that you also play video games or read comics.

I know that with my look and interests I can could potentially be pigeonholed as a particular kind of guy so I don't make it any worse by playing games, watching cartoons etc. Luckily I don't enjoy those things anyway but it's a case of being honest with yourself and how you come across when people initially meet you or what they can learn about you in the first couple of dates.

[IntrovertSigma]

(02-12-2018 05:40 AM)britchard Wrote:  

As a side note, be thankful that lifting is frowned upon in Europe.

Really?

I saw a news piece about how steroid use is increasingly becoming a problem amongst men in the UK.

https://www.theguardian.com/society/2018...-not-sport

Sport and fitness are big amongst many demographics, including well educated people (rugby, tennis, cricket, hockey).

[seabridge]

^^Having a fit body is frowned upon no where in the world

[Jetset]

(02-11-2018 10:00 PM)HankMoody Wrote:  

Video games (the exception being sports games with friends or Wii games that you can play with her)

I've found that another exception to this can be strategy games that clearly look far too complicated for her to understand.

This is up there with leaving a copy of this week's Economist or the Meditations of Marcus Aurelius around. If the rest of your persona is on-point, that you're physically capable and socially aware, suspecting that you're secretly also at least an octave smarter than anybody else she might date can really throw her off, especially in a Rust Belt-type area where the unspoken fear among brighter single women is dead-ending with a drunk woodchuck.



"That is a GAME? How do you even..."

"Oh, yeah. It's very enjoyable."

"WHAT DEGREE DO YOU NEED FOR THIS?"

Don't be an autist and try to explain it to her. You just have your own life that she doesn't and won't understand. Playing chess over coffee isn't a bad one, either, if she's any good. Kicking her ass without making a big deal out of it is a subtle "your tits can't fix everything" signal that frustrates the hell out of them. Use the conversation and hand gestures to keep her attention off whatever you're planning on the board.

[sterling_archer]

I am very passionate about traditional(!) archery and bowyery which I think are masculine hobbies. After all this was an war industry in the past. But few people know about this. When they find out, I can see that bowyery is so unusual that I am always ready to counter with an argument that will present me in different light than "weirdo that likes making weapons". Aside from bows, recently I took making knives and have made one non functional sword, with a proper one coming this summer. I think this is a bit different than building bows as it sounds more dangerous and weirder. After all, many people practice archery but how is mostly know for swinging swords? Fat weirdos on internet fail videos. Few know about HEMA and that it is an legit martial art.

Anyway, point is that people should be ready to diffuse potential mockery and have the ability to present themselves in best light as possible. I even think that you can someway present yourself good even if you play LOL or WOW.

[the1element]

(02-11-2018 10:00 PM)HankMoody Wrote:  

First, off, hobbies don't necessarily attract women right off the bat. If you meet a woman at the bar, a club, or even during day game, talking about how you put a dude twice your size into a submission hold or hiked Mount Everest isn't going to generate all that much attraction. What they're looking for at first is your height, fitness level, style, body language, eye contact, etc. Physical attraction is first and foremost.

Second, once a woman is hooked, you can literally tell her that your favorite hobby in the world is catching Pokemon, and the next week she'll have Pokemon Go installed on her phone, texting you about all the Pikachus she caught at work. Most women don't have strong identities, so often they're looking to latch onto yours. This is a good thing - women are attracted to strong men. Being a strong man means having a sense of purpose and identity.

How women interpret your hobbies depends on how much she likes you. So, if you're going to engage in a hobby, do it for yourself not to pickup women.

All that aside, there are some hobbies that get ginas tingling, some hobbies that women don't care about, and some hobbies that will downright turn them off.

My observations...

Masculine Hobbies

Masculine hobbies are fun and they turn hookups into LTRs and girls who just can't get enough of you...

In no particular order, this is what I've found women find attractive: off-roading, traveling, martial arts (not karate, kung fu, or cardio kickboxing. I'm talking Muay Thai kickboxing, boxing, Jiu Jitsu, or anything that actually involves sparring / hitting a heavy bag), bodybuilding, swimming, sports (almost any sport; I've seen cricket players bring hot chicks to their matches. Even golf will work if you're decent. One of my favorite dates is the batting cages because I can hit a baseball), hiking, camping, cooking (not pastries), painting, working on cars, cigars, cycling (not in a gym), tattoos, preaching, music (both playing and knowing about good music - not "I listen to the radio"), high end stereo systems in both your house and car, motorcycles, woodworking, hunting, fishing, kayaking, sculpting, local professional sports (provided you watch them with her, or at least accommodate her team), big dogs (women love big dogs, and men who have big dogs), pool (if you're good), guns (every woman I've taken to the range I ended up banging without fail), Crossfit, skiing, snowboarding, etc.

This list is non-extensive and just to give you ideas.

Basically, anything that is dangerous, active, or traditionally masculine they find attractive. It doesn't matter what women say, at the end of the day they're attracted to "real men".

That said, you have to do these things because you enjoy them - not to impress girls. The key is to either let her watch you do it, or do them with her. Take her to a local sports game, a camping trip, or tell her to come hang out in the garage and drink a beer while you fix up the car and smoke a cigar. I wrote the other thread about "gym dates" - same concept applies. Do something you enjoy, that you're good at, and sometimes do it with her. This is how you take a hookup into a mini-LTR or long term girlfriend. She'll be hooked in no time.

Finally, make sure to be good at these hobbies. If you take her camping, know how to start a fire, pitch a tent, cook over an open fire, and how to follow trail blazes. If she's going to watch you spar at Jiu Jitsu, don't get submitted in the first 5 seconds. If you're going to lift together, be able to bench more than 135, etc. You can do all this stuff without her, and it's fun in its own right.

I try and keep most of my hobbies to this kind of stuff.

Hobbies that are Neutral

Key point - women do not want to date their "best friend" or even someone they have a lot in common with. A lot of the women I've banged this year were liberals, thought camping would be "gross", and the thought of going to church was foreign.

Within a few months, they're suddenly open to Trump, camping "was like SO FUN!!!", and they're asking me to take them to church. They were turned on how by how different I am than most of the men they meet online, and how pigheadedly dedicated I am about my hobbies, lifestyle, and person. I know exactly who I am, what I want, and I will change for no woman. They can change for me.

That aside, this is the stuff that I enjoy doing that doesn't necessarily add any attraction to a relationship, but sometimes they'll want to know more...

Reading (mostly philosophy, theology, and history), writing (I write a very popular blog that some women read and others don't care about), wine, art history, plays / opera / musicals / jazz performances (some love going, some hate it), restaurants (it does score you points to know all the cool fun places to go), politics (most women only care about abortion, Planned Parenthood, and "TRUMP IS EVIL!!!", but sometimes you can engage them on a higher level), religion (this grows on women when you're in an LTR, though. They usually think it's weird at first, but then they come to respect it, and even want to be part of it), your job (what I do is too complicated to explain to them), fantasy sports, poker, running (they don't care how far you can run, and most like beefier guys anyway), computers, gardening, yoga (if done right, yoga is actually a good place to meet women and a fine activity, especially for fighters), photography (can sometimes be moved into the "sexy" category if you're really good at it, and do it in dangerous spots), real estate / investing, etc.

These are all great things. However, hobbies that are intellectually stimulating do not generate or maintain attraction - even if she's into the same stuff.

Often you'll meet a girl who is a bookworm and loves jazz, yet she's banging the bartender who hasn't read a book since he dropped out of high school.

Opposites do attract.

Having hobbies in common with women doesn't mean they will be attracted to you. If anything, most of them want to be exposed to something new and different. The Democrat atheist female often finds herself attracted to the jacked Trump supporter who goes to church every Sunday.

My advice? Do what you like. Don't try and find stuff in common with women.

Hobbies That Turn Women Off

This morning I was at the gym with a new plate. We lifted weights together, I showed her how to use the machines, and then we played competitive racquetball. After, we went back to my house and I cooked brunch - French omelette with peppers and artichoke hearts (garnished with tarragon), and diced Asian pears. Simple meal, but tasted great. (Read "The 4 Hour Chef" by Tim Ferriss and you'll be pretty competent in the kitchen quickly. One of the best books I've ever read.)

She was sort of complaining about her ex-boyfriend. "He seemed really good on paper, had a good job, but all he wanted to do was play video games. He never left the house, he couldn't cook, and I swear the guy would die if you left him out in the woods for more than 5 hours. I had so much fun today biking to the gym, working out, and cooking. Today was totally awesome!" I know she's hooked.

Case in point, hobbies that are active turn women on.

These are the hobbies that turn women off:

Video games (the exception being sports games with friends or Wii games that you can play with her), stamp / coin collecting, posting on forums (I would never tell women that I post here, ever), anime, comic books, LARP, movies / TV shows (talking about these things makes you her bestie, not her lover), anything traditionally feminine (knitting, baking pastries / cakes, skinny jeans, etc. No matter how progressive she is, in her mind she's thinking "What a fag. I need a real man"), sending long "well thought out" text messages all fucking day and night, talking to her about internet drama on a forum, small dogs / gerbils / hamsters, eating at really pedestrian restaurants like Olive Garden / TGI Friday (if you're poor, just go to an ethnic place that is a BYO), complaining about your depression / health issues / anything (unless it's "my shoulder is still all fucked up from sparring last week" or "my legs are still rubber from all that squatting". Otherwise, save that shit for your male friends, pastor, or therapist), not having male friends, talking about how "dumb" sports / jocks are (that just means you're a loser and jealous of people who are athletic), talking about your feelings, My Little Pony / Power Puff Girls, etc. (dude...), anything that is "computer geek" or "nerd humor" (just keep it to yourself), etc.

Basically, anything that implies you're trying to escape the real world, rather than live in it, turns women off. It's one thing to read a good book, it's another thing to sit on your couch and play video games every single night.

In addition, anything that is traditionally feminine also turns women off, because they're looking for "real men", not "boys" and most certainly not closeted fags. I got a nice compliment today - "You're one of the most masculine males I've ever met." "Oh yeah? I'm only 5'5." "For some reason, you're not short in my mind."

Finally, anything that implies you're weak and/or un-athletic. Those guys from The Big Bang Theory would never get laid in real life, except by morbidly obese chicks. Sorry.

Candidly, I play video games. I love Final Fantasy and other RPGs, but I don't talk about video games with women or ever let them see me playing them. A few weeks ago a woman was in my bedroom and was like "You have a Playstation? You don't strike me as the video game type." I responded "I just play sports games" (not true).

If you like these things, do them. I like many of them, just understand that telling a girl that you've leveled Cloud Strife up to level 99 and gotten all the limit breaks will turn a woman off early into the relationship. Once she's hooked, you can say whatever the fuck you want.

Also, if you're going to engage in "dorky" hobbies, make sure to do at least a few masculine ones. Go spar for a few hours and then unwind with a glass of wine and Playstation. You want her to think you can hold your own in a fight, fix a flat tire, and survive in the woods for a few days. Once that's established, fire up the Playstation and pour a glass of wine.

Feel free to chime in, hombres...

(02-12-2018 10:10 AM)sterling_archer Wrote:  

I am very passionate about traditional(!) archery and bowyery which I think are masculine hobbies. After all this was an war industry in the past. But few people know about this. When they find out, I can see that bowyery is so unusual that I am always ready to counter with an argument that will present me in different light than "weirdo that likes making weapons". Aside from bows, recently I took making knives and have made one non functional sword, with a proper one coming this summer. I think this is a bit different than building bows as it sounds more dangerous and weirder. After all, many people practice archery but how is mostly know for swinging swords? Fat weirdos on internet fail videos. Few know about HEMA and that it is an legit martial art.

Anyway, point is that people should be ready to diffuse potential mockery and have the ability to present themselves in best light as possible. I even think that you can someway present yourself good even if you play LOL or WOW.

Thats fucking sick man.

I remember watching an old video on youtube of this guy with a longbow and they were talking about the immense strength needed.

Sword making sounds so different, but obviously super masculine. How is forging a blade not masculine?

I think with the more weirder hobbies, it's all how you frame it.

"I like making swords and knives because I like taking such a raw component like steel and forging it with my own will, hammering it on an anvil, turning that steel into a blade that I can later use or use with my martial arts. It makes me feel more connected to the art and reminds me of a time when blacksmiths were around."

That's just an example.

Do you have any pictures of some stuff you've made? I'm genuinley curious.

Do you hunt with traditional archery?

[sterling_archer]

I don't hunt because bow hunting is forbidden. I think it is better so when I look at the state of our hunters (fat drunkards). When mentality changes, people may be ready for such a thing, but not now, even though I am sure there would be some that will jump at first opportunity (like me).

I am not forging, I am doing stock removal. End product is basically the same as steel blank before going into store (hot rolling) is subjected to practically same process as forging from some chunk of steel.

I will not show pictures as they could be traced to me, but here is datasheet I made specifically for this forum.

[the1element]

(02-12-2018 10:44 AM)sterling_archer Wrote:  

I don't hunt because bow hunting is forbidden. I think it is better so when I look at the state of our hunters (fat drunkards). When mentality changes, people may be ready for such a thing, but not now, even though I am sure there would be some that will jump at first opportunity (like me).

I am not forging, I am doing stock removal. End product is basically the same as steel blank before going into store (hot rolling) is subjected to practically same process as forging from some chunk of steel.

I will not show pictures as they could be traced to me, but here is datasheet I made specifically for this forum.

That is fucking cool, I'm definitely going to make my own bow.

Man.

Massive +1 for that post.

[sterling_archer]

Very cool, you can PM if you want to know something, I would be glad to help.

[Dalaran1991]

(02-12-2018 10:10 AM)sterling_archer Wrote:  

I am very passionate about traditional(!) archery and bowyery which I think are masculine hobbies. After all this was an war industry in the past. But few people know about this. When they find out, I can see that bowyery is so unusual that I am always ready to counter with an argument that will present me in different light than "weirdo that likes making weapons". Aside from bows, recently I took making knives and have made one non functional sword, with a proper one coming this summer. I think this is a bit different than building bows as it sounds more dangerous and weirder. After all, many people practice archery but how is mostly know for swinging swords? Fat weirdos on internet fail videos. Few know about HEMA and that it is an legit martial art.

Bro, if I knew how to make bows I surely would be hitting bulleyes on all those G-spot. You have a golden hobby for pulling pussies right there and you dont know it!

This is a great example of how to present your hobby in the most attractive way. I would tell all the artsy students I hang out with that I'm skilled at carpentry (not bowery) and tell them to come over and take a look at my hand crafted bow etc. Then, I suspect if you can make a fucking bow you would have no trouble making a nice lamp rack or scuplting some wooden knife handle. Girls go absolutely insane over that shit.

Waiting for datasheets....

[sterling_archer]

(02-12-2018 11:34 AM)Dalaran1991 Wrote:  

Then, I suspect if you can make a fucking bow you would have no trouble making a nice lamp rack or scuplting some wooden knife handle. Girls go absolutely insane over that shit.

No I wouldn't have trouble except proper woodworking table for doing those nice and precise alignments, cuttings and what not. Bow making is 99% by hand so my tools represent that. One day I would really like to get into sculpting wood. I saw amazing figures that I would like to have for myself around the house or in house.

Quote:

Waiting for datasheets....

Let me guess, for a sword? But really, since a lot of people here are into camping/survival, I had an idea once to make survival knife datasheet with minimum tools used. Like simple knife that you can use to split wood if you have no hatchet or for cutting twine, skinning animals and what not.

[heavy]

(02-11-2018 11:02 PM)HankMoody Wrote:  

(02-11-2018 10:51 PM)Eugenics Wrote:  

Agree with most your points with the exception of the implication that you should hide your less masculine hobbies even if it's something you're passionate about.

Fuck that. I like Anime, I play every new fallout and Far Cry, I and play chess every day to keep sharp and once in a while if I get a wild hair up my ass I bake a mean pecan pie. I have done every single one of those activities with a girl I'm banging and even if it turned them off of me (it didnt) I would do it again. Because I wanted to do it, I didn't and still don't care if a woman finds those things unattractive. I don't live to please women. Now I've also taken girls shooting, showed them secret hiking spots, taught them how to drive a stick and cut down a Christmas Tree etc etc but again those were things I wanted to do as well. Which is something you mention several times in your post, do stuff because you want to.

I think the most important thing is to maintain a masculine frame. I don't think it matters what you do. I'm not trying to attack you and I have no doubt you slay HankMoody but this post seems a little off center if you're telling people to do what they're into not because women like them but then repping hiding things you do like from them because they would want you to. I understand this advice may be aimed at the greener players here and I think the foundation of what you're saying is sound but you should offer up some nuances to your ideas so nobody gets any strange ideas about frame.

Edit:

Reread your post again, missed the part about "once they're hooked you can say whatever you want". Excuse my criticism, this was clearly aimed at the initial attraction phase.

Once a woman is into you, you can do whatever you want openly. You can play Pokemon Go, have a million comic books, and a CD collection of Michael Bolton and Yanni. They won't care.

However, you don't want her disqualifying you on the first, second, or third date.

This is what you're trying to avoid -

"I met this guy, he seemed really cool, but then all he talked about was comic books and anime."

Women are quick to disqualify you for dumb shit in the beginning. Once you've banged, they're slow to let go.

Shit, once a woman is hooked, it's like this:

"Can I come over?"
"eh tonight isn't good for me im about to beat metal gear solid 3..."
"But you've already beaten that game!"
"ya but im about to beat it again"

Right, once they're into you (banged a few times), they're indifferent. This is why I actually think you should do whatever hobbies you want regardless of chicks. If you want to knit afghans, go right ahead...but I'll give you shit when I see you.

Hobbies are so you have stuff to talk about with those around you, and so your friends have reasons to give you shit. My buddies always make fun of me for doing BJJ...but they're also curious about it.

Hobbies are so, if and when you have extra time, you stay busy. It's so you can honestly tell her you're busy, or not worry about it when you don't get a text back from a chick, or when a chick flakes on you it's no big deal.

Hobbies are so when you're married, your wife doesn't get bored of you because you have no other passions in life except her and your kid.

Hobbies are so you have something you love that your wife doesn't give a shit about, other than the fact that you love it. A sweet woman subtly rolls her eyes about your obsession while loving that her man has an obsession.

To the first point, when you're first hanging out, I don't think girls generally care about hearing about a hobby, whether it's manly or womanly. They want to be teased, and they want to talk about themselves. They want you to want them. Sure, sprinkle in a bit about yourself, but they care about how you make them feel, not about what you do with your time.

"Basically, anything that implies you're trying to escape the real world, rather than live in it, turns women off."

Agreed. I would generally say there are productive hobbies and consumptive hobbies, and it's a gradient. You can usually tell by how much discipline it takes.

Productive: Woodworking...build a table, sell it, build another, sell it. You're creating something. Also, you have to plan and will have to solve problems when you're creating things. It's meaningful. You're creating order from chaos, as Jordan Peterson would say.

Consumptive: For me, golf is consumptive. I do it to socialize with friends and lazily enjoy outdoors. It requires no discipline. It's not something I do for a higher calling. It's not meaningful to me.

In between: I have a friend who practices a lot and is a scratch golfer. For him it's a discipline. He's actually working to provide order from chaos. It's a part of his identity. He also provides value to a lot of (high value) guys looking for outing golf partners, so there are payoffs.

BJJ is like that for me. There's meaning in it for me. It requires discipline and focus.

Edit: A hobby you stick with should ultimately provide you value (money, looks (lifting), health, expertise, leadership skill, women). Before BJJ, basketball provided me some health and some friendships (social value), but I moved on because it wasn't providing me enough value.

[britchard]

(02-12-2018 07:48 AM)IntrovertSigma Wrote:  

(02-12-2018 05:40 AM)britchard Wrote:  

As a side note, be thankful that lifting is frowned upon in Europe.

Really?

I saw a news piece about how steroid use is increasingly becoming a problem amongst men in the UK.

https://www.theguardian.com/society/2018...-not-sport

Sport and fitness are big amongst many demographics, including well educated people (rugby, tennis, cricket, hockey).

Continental Europe, excluding the UK and Ireland and to some extent France.

[True Balla]

I've been mentioning Cryptocurrency a lot on my dates...how would you guys rate it? Obviously its on the nerdy side, but I feel like talking about 'Bitcoin' is now on the super smart/rich as fuck side