[The Beast1]

(03-04-2017 10:34 PM)Leonard D Neubache Wrote:  

(03-04-2017 10:19 AM)The Beast1 Wrote:  

(03-02-2017 03:53 PM)rudebwoy Wrote:  

^He is 22 WTF

My wife's parents got married at that exact age in the early 80s.

I have friends from my fly over town that got married at the same time.

It isn't as far fetch'd as one might thing. Not to mention 4 years of a solid LTR is more than enough time to make the jump to a long term relationship especially if his girl was a virgin.

This whole "you're young, go out and bang broads" is complete hogwash. If you found a good girl at a young age and everything checks out why not marry her?

Going out and indiscriminately banging sluts isn't healthy as most of us have attested here.

Important question. Were these friends hesitant when they married? Did the man in these relationships still long to sow his wild oats?

Nope, they just did it and it was sort of a surprise when I heard the news. This was the guy's second relationship. It was the girl's first.

(03-05-2017 12:55 AM)kaotic Wrote:  

(03-04-2017 10:19 AM)The Beast1 Wrote:  

My wife's parents got married at that exact age in the early 80s.

This isn't the 80's - that's 30+ years ago.

Are you willing to say things are the same when it comes to relationships and marriage ?

Honestly, outside of the big cities: yes it is. Go to a city that has under 100,000 people. The ones that don't run off to the big city are the ones that got married young.

Go live in fly over country for a while. It's a whole different world out there.

(03-05-2017 12:55 AM)kaotic Wrote:  

Quote:

This whole "you're young, go out and bang broads" is complete hogwash. If you found a good girl at a young age and everything checks out why not marry her?

Going out and indiscriminately banging sluts isn't healthy as most of us have attested here.

I don't believe going out and exploring women to find out what you truly like is hogwash.

I do believe that some men aren't built for the player lifestyle, they just want to be happy with 1 woman and build a family around that, which is absolutely respectable.

BUT this day and age they need to be a man armed to the teeth when it comes to handling women, relationships, and masculinity.

This isn't your Gramps 60+ year marriage in the good ol' days.

There are ways to arm men with the knowledge of what bad women look like without encouraging one to go out and take a sampling. The only reason we had to go out and do the sampling was because of the destruction of such knowledge by the left. The constant "red pilling" going on out there is quickly forcing this knowledge back into the public's psyche.

If anything, the advice of, "Go out and see what you like" is helping contribute to the decline of good women in the world.

I'll repeat it again: if you're young (under 22) and you've found a women that respects you, cooks for you, wants to run a home, wants children, and is a virgin you've hit the lottery. You will rarely be able to find a girl like that again.

Most men aren't going to have the skills to bang 18 year old virgins as an older man. The men who claim that they can are the exception, not the rule.

Women are water and their experiences are the glass. The earlier you get them, the sooner you can mold them into what you want. The knowledge we posses here can restore the old dating customs of the past.

If we want to avoid this dystopian future for our children, it's time we start encouraging people to stay for good in healthy and functional relationships as young as possible.

[crottstep]

(03-05-2017 10:51 AM)The Beast1 Wrote:  

Most men aren't going to have the skills to bang 18 year old virgins as an older man. The men who claim that they can are the exception, not the rule.

While I've read what OP is going through and am not looking to derail the thread in this direction altogether, I would be curious to hear more of your thoughts on this, might expending further? Assuming that

1) average RvF member is above majority of the population in terms of social skills / game and self-development in all senses - money, health and lifestyle

and 2) goal is not to "bang" 18yo virgins consistently but rather have the ability to date them reliably & lock down best option

how would this particular skill stack fair? Would it be enough to make the cut, or to what extent would overcompensating in other areas such as status & money be necessary?

Assuming one would be part of same age group as OP, maybe even older, look at this from whatever perspective you must. I do believe OP would find this relevant as well in making his decision. It will certainly be more valuable than any thoughts a young guy like myself would have on his situation.

[kaotic]

(03-05-2017 10:51 AM)The Beast1 Wrote:  

Honestly, outside of the big cities: yes it is. Go to a city that has under 100,000 people. The ones that don't run off to the big city are the ones that got married young.

Go live in fly over country for a while. It's a whole different world out there.

I'll give you most of that, but also temptation is a click away.

Quote:

There are ways to arm men with the knowledge of what bad women look like without encouraging one to go out and take a sampling. The only reason we had to go out and do the sampling was because of the destruction of such knowledge by the left. The constant "red pilling" going on out there is quickly forcing this knowledge back into the public's psyche.

Paper Tigers.

If you don't have experience dating or being in relationships or with women then that's all that is.

It's not actual EXPERIENCES.

Even some "good" women turn out rotten.

I'm not saying go out and bang every single thing on two legs for this guy.

You can read theory and learn game but you also need to apply it.

Quote:

If anything, the advice of, "Go out and see what you like" is helping contribute to the decline of good women in the world.

The decline of good women, was because of feminism, weak men, and cultural Marxism.

A good women will be a good women with or without player's in the picture.

Quote:

I'll repeat it again: if you're young (under 22) and you've found a women that respects you, cooks for you, wants to run a home, wants children, and is a virgin you've hit the lottery. You will rarely be able to find a girl like that again.

While I agree with most of this - this is also somewhat of a pedastalization.

Like I mentioned this before, I don't think this is the case for him.

Quote:

Most men aren't going to have the skills to bang 18 year old virgins as an older man. The men who claim that they can are the exception, not the rule.

This forum IS the exception, this is what I'm basing my views on, not the general male population.

Quote:

Women are water and their experiences are the glass. The earlier you get them, the sooner you can mold them into what you want. The knowledge we posses here can restore the old dating customs of the past.

I 100% do agree with this.

Quote:

If we want to avoid this dystopian future for our children, it's time we start encouraging people to stay for good in healthy and functional relationships as young as possible.

I said before, most men are built for this, I can't say the same for this forum.


I have nothing against him moving to be with this girl - just don't throw caution into the wind.

I also think we need more details about how this was dropped into his lap and her reaction when her parents told her to move home - those 2 things by themselves would speak volumes.

[frozen-ace]

I've seen the parent rescue many times. It means it is over. And she is on board with it (or it wouldn't be happening). When mama and papa have to step in to set things right, it means her life has gone wrong (and you are part of that wrong life) and they are going to come rescue her to try and set it right. It's like the old Nintendo game where you hit the reset button- she gets to start over. I've even seen it with a married woman who had a child and another on the way...her parents came and picked her up to "get things right" and she never came back.

For long distance to work you have to see each other regularly. Have you looked at flight schedules, cost, and travel time? If either (or both) of you don't live near a major airport it will be really challenging. Do you have the cash and time off to fly out there every 3-4 weeks? At $18/hr, I just don't see this as a realistic choice. And she probably won't have the funds to come visit you...

And something about long distance -> you can go on a great 10-day trip with your LD LTR and a few days after you get back and settle into your routine, it will feel as if the trip never happened. It won't buy you more time, it won't keep things going longer. You always need to have a trip planned, something just over the horizon to keep her engaged. It is really exhausting.. And as soon as it slips...you get busy, can't get work time off, have family issues to deal with / whatever...and pretty soon 4 weeks turn into 6 which turn into 8, and that's when things will fall apart.

[Off The Reservation]

I knew by your thread title you were in trouble.

A girl is amazing because she stays. A girl that runs away is not amazing.

A girl that gets into deep debt at 20 is not amazing.

A girl who is 20 and is under the control of her parents is not amazing.

Her parents didn't force her, she called them and asked for a ticket. You just got the story she though you wanted to hear.

Now why exactly would you follow her somewhere? After she leaves do some research on codependency and work on yourself as some other great posts have suggested.

[Off The Reservation]

(03-03-2017 07:59 PM)Deadlifts Wrote:  

(03-02-2017 11:50 PM)Serious Sam Wrote:  

Quote:

but her parents are literally forcing her to move back to South Carolina.

This part bothers me the most, and it's not consistent with what you say later (more on that in a bit). Out of the LTRs I've had, one had parents who weren't quite overbearing, but more involved than I liked. I love it when a woman is close to her family, but there is a limit, and this, to me, exceeds it.

It also doesn't sound like you all were working towards anything together. I get it. You were young when you started dating then all of a sudden four years had passed. If you weren't looking to marry her soon, then when were you considering it? Another year or two? A man who's ready to make that leap and start a family knows by at least year two. Graft mentions old school marriages above, but nothing about this situation sounds like an old school marriage. It sounds more like a modern day high school sweetheart situation where they grew comfortable but weren't really looking toward the future, just merely floating along within their comfort zone.

Quote:

Her debt is not entirely from the accident, she got a house with 2 other girls who come to find out are just low lives that don't pay rent, she works crazy hours at work and pays for majority of the bills. She also covers the other two girls rent when they don't have the money yet. Now her car is totaled, she's in a really shitty situation and is stressed as hell over everything. This, and given the fact she's only 20 years old I don't blame her for wanting to run back to Mom and Dad who she hasn't seen in almost two years. I've never given her any money to pay off debt, but I do what I can to make her life less stressful (take her out, fuck her like a porn star, workout together, ect. ect.) She keeps telling me how much she wants to make this work between us, and she's done so much already. Feelsbadman

The bold part is what I found inconsistent. Is she running back or is she being forced back? Due to your inconsistency, I'm leaning more towards it being her choice, with a bit of parental control involved. Here's the tough pill to swallow: If she really wanted to continue building a life with you, she would find a way to make shit work in Michigan. But instead, she's running off to South Carolina. Sure, she's comfortable within your relationship now, but there is no stability for her (not from you, anyway), and she recognizes that.

If you were truly her rock and ready to enter into marriage, then she would work with you to work out her problems. But you aren't her rock; her mother and father are. Don't take this hard because you're still very young and have a lot of life to live, but based on what I've read, you aren't prepared to take this relationship any further than it's current conclusion. You two have been comfortable together for four years. She's familiar and you're familiar. But now shit has gotten real for her, and you, at this point, aren't strong enough to wade her through rocky waters. That's why she's moving home. She probably wants you to come, but most likely due to your familiarity and not because you provide the strong support she needs.

This is the reality of the situation. I would take a hard, long look in the mirror and ask yourself if you're truly prepared to be the leader of a family. Be honest with yourself. It's okay if the answer is no. I answered no when I was a few years older than you, and that's why I broke it off with a girl I truly cared about. If the answer is no (and I have a strong feeling it is), then I'd stay where you are. There's no use in uprooting your life for a relationship that won't be built into a marriage and family.

To further illustrate my point, I'm going to add what I've seen from some successful marriages. When I have talked to wives within good marriages, I have found consistency in their answers for what they like most about their husbands (and this can be hard to come by with women). The main thing I hear is something along the lines of "he's dependable" "he's reliable" "he makes me feel safe." Even so-called "strong and independent" women are terrified, weak little creatures who, deep down, know they have no chance once a true threat comes their way. This is why I say that she needs to see you as a rock. She can lean on you within any situation and you never buckle.

An ex of mine and I were driving through a snow storm. She was behind the wheel and I was passed out in the passenger seat after skiing all day. I wake up because she's freaking out. It's a fucking blizzard, the road is all white, you can't see any lanes, and you can barely see two feet in front of you. I tried to get her to pull off, but she wouldn't because you could barely tell the road from a potential snow bank. So I calmly talked her through it. I kept my eyes peeled, kept her calm, and walked her through what to do. We made it home safe. She later told me how much she admired my calmness through the whole situation. The fact was, I was terrified, but I didn't let it show. This is a part of frame maintenance that is rarely talked about: when you're overwhelmed, but make her believe you've got it.

Your girlfriend is in a shitty situation. If she's turning to her parents for guidance instead of you, then she doesn't see you as that calming force to help her weather the storm. This is why moving to SC, in my opinion, is pointless. You aren't ready to take this relationship to the next level. It's merely a comfortable situation for you both since you've been together so long, but it's probably not going anywhere. If she truly saw you as dependable and reliable, then she would have handled the problem with you.

What a fantastic response. This makes a lot of sense, thank you. Reading through your post made me realize my faults in this relationship, I've always been afraid of getting too attached to a woman and because of this have probably failed more comfort tests than passed. I feel as though she definitely wants me to move with her, she's asked me to come. Her parents and I are on good terms. In fact a detail I left out was I had already lived with her and her parents for almost a year when they lived in Florida (I didn't want to make the original post too long and ranting) My question is, is it too late to salvage a successful relationship with her? What if I decide I do want to be her rock, her leader and consider the option of marriage with her? What would be the best route to take in your opinion? I'm assuming I should talk to her about all of this first?

(03-05-2017 10:51 AM)The Beast1 Wrote:  

(03-04-2017 10:34 PM)Leonard D Neubache Wrote:  

(03-04-2017 10:19 AM)The Beast1 Wrote:  

(03-02-2017 03:53 PM)rudebwoy Wrote:  

^He is 22 WTF

My wife's parents got married at that exact age in the early 80s.

I have friends from my fly over town that got married at the same time.

It isn't as far fetch'd as one might thing. Not to mention 4 years of a solid LTR is more than enough time to make the jump to a long term relationship especially if his girl was a virgin.

This whole "you're young, go out and bang broads" is complete hogwash. If you found a good girl at a young age and everything checks out why not marry her?

Going out and indiscriminately banging sluts isn't healthy as most of us have attested here.

Important question. Were these friends hesitant when they married? Did the man in these relationships still long to sow his wild oats?

Nope, they just did it and it was sort of a surprise when I heard the news. This was the guy's second relationship. It was the girl's first.

(03-05-2017 12:55 AM)kaotic Wrote:  

(03-04-2017 10:19 AM)The Beast1 Wrote:  

My wife's parents got married at that exact age in the early 80s.

This isn't the 80's - that's 30+ years ago.

Are you willing to say things are the same when it comes to relationships and marriage ?

Honestly, outside of the big cities: yes it is. Go to a city that has under 100,000 people. The ones that don't run off to the big city are the ones that got married young.

Go live in fly over country for a while. It's a whole different world out there.

(03-05-2017 12:55 AM)kaotic Wrote:  

Quote:

This whole "you're young, go out and bang broads" is complete hogwash. If you found a good girl at a young age and everything checks out why not marry her?

Going out and indiscriminately banging sluts isn't healthy as most of us have attested here.

I don't believe going out and exploring women to find out what you truly like is hogwash.

I do believe that some men aren't built for the player lifestyle, they just want to be happy with 1 woman and build a family around that, which is absolutely respectable.

BUT this day and age they need to be a man armed to the teeth when it comes to handling women, relationships, and masculinity.

This isn't your Gramps 60+ year marriage in the good ol' days.

There are ways to arm men with the knowledge of what bad women look like without encouraging one to go out and take a sampling. The only reason we had to go out and do the sampling was because of the destruction of such knowledge by the left. The constant "red pilling" going on out there is quickly forcing this knowledge back into the public's psyche.

If anything, the advice of, "Go out and see what you like" is helping contribute to the decline of good women in the world.

I'll repeat it again: if you're young (under 22) and you've found a women that respects you, cooks for you, wants to run a home, wants children, and is a virgin you've hit the lottery. You will rarely be able to find a girl like that again.

Most men aren't going to have the skills to bang 18 year old virgins as an older man. The men who claim that they can are the exception, not the rule.

Women are water and their experiences are the glass. The earlier you get them, the sooner you can mold them into what you want. The knowledge we posses here can restore the old dating customs of the past.

If we want to avoid this dystopian future for our children, it's time we start encouraging people to stay for good in healthy and functional relationships as young as possible.

That sounds great regarding keeping great girls but i venture to guess likely does not apply to the Original Post. The OP is so light on detail, so obviously pedestal-izing, and so tailored to please the red pill reader that I doubt it is a true and correct analysis of the girl. Not saying that OP is lying, rather that he is describing her in a she has these ideal bullet points type of way. The whole and real girl may technically have these bullet points but there are 1. the missing "rest" of the description and 2. the actions show disloyalty.

This is a divorce, but OP does not see it because there aren't any papers to sign.

[The Beast1]

Agreed on your concerns OTR and Kaotic. To be honest, we'd need to see this girl in person to make a true answer.

Still, i'm going to give OP the benefit of the doubt. Not to mention, it's time we start seriously considering more serious options for supposedly good girls that check off the long list of items we yearn for.

[Nowak]

(03-05-2017 12:55 AM)kaotic Wrote:  

(03-04-2017 10:19 AM)The Beast1 Wrote:  

My wife's parents got married at that exact age in the early 80s.

This isn't the 80's - that's 30+ years ago.

Are you willing to say things are the same when it comes to relationships and marriage ?

Quote:

This whole "you're young, go out and bang broads" is complete hogwash. If you found a good girl at a young age and everything checks out why not marry her?

Going out and indiscriminately banging sluts isn't healthy as most of us have attested here.

I don't believe going out and exploring women to find out what you truly like is hogwash.

I do believe that some men aren't built for the player lifestyle, they just want to be happy with 1 woman and build a family around that, which is absolutely respectable.

BUT this day and age they need to be a man armed to the teeth when it comes to handling women, relationships, and masculinity.

This isn't your Gramps 60+ year marriage in the good ol' days.

(03-04-2017 02:25 PM)Nowak Wrote:  

Respectfully disagree,
LDRs are far far far from ideal but can be superior in certain circumstances. I had friends in Wien,(now moved back home and are still with the girls) from Russia,Ukraine and Kazakstan. Compared to the inferior quality of Austrian girls as well as the snooty/uglier on average Eastern European/Central Asian girls ,they made the right move for sure

He probably wont be able to find another girl like this so easily

This isn't Asia, this isn't the FSU, this is America.

You defeated your own argument in your first sentence alone - if it's far far far far from ideal - then why bother with something that doesn't adhere to your ideals ?

Because "love" ? You have to think rationally for a second instead of emotionally.

OP has been with the woman for 3 years - if she's a good girl and truly was devoted to him I think the conversation would have gone a little differently than her saying -

"Hey FYI I'm broke, my parents already booked me a plane ticket and plan on picking up in a month"

^^^That right there is suspect to me, it sounds like she pretty much tossed this into his lap without much of resistance against her parents.

What's his current alternative? Just because you cant always get what you want doesn't mean you should get nothing. He can and should take a calculated risk. There's no reason to make this a black or white situation.

[Dr. Howard]

My advice to the OP is a combination of Vaun and TheBeast1's perspective.

From "TheBeast1's" side, this chick could stay with the OP if she was willing to and 'all in' to the relationship. Also, if the parents saw the OP as being stable, secure and good for their daughter they probably would let her stay and consider her in good hands. If Op and his girl were in a truly committed, interdependent relationship, they would be working through her debt and car accident together and her parents would be supporting the relationship, not trying to lift their daughter out of it. Its not unheard of, conservative Christians around where I live are married at 22.

On Vaun's side. This chick is leaving. She doesn't seem to be fighting her parents to stay. It doesn't sound like OP and the girl are anything more than LTR boyfriend and girlfriend, not an intertwined truly interdependent husband and wife. If they were, the story would be something like "My girls parents are threatening to disown her because she won't move to SC. Chick wants to get married and have babies...am I in trouble?" Its not. She has sided with her parents and is headed back to her hometown, where she will probably fuck all of her high school boyfriends she hasn't seen in a while.

This relationship is not salvageable, its too far late in the process. She has chosen to go with her parents, let her go, DO NOT move with a girl and NEVER move to a girl's hometown. Moving to a girl's hometown is like moving to India to be with your Hindu wife and her family.

OP, before you consider jumping off a bridge, it may/likely have nothing to do with you. The girl may just be too immature/young that she is still attached to her parents and not ready to leave. Her mindset might still be that of a teenager where she just wants mom and dad to take care of her while she has no responsibilities and 'parties' with her friends. Thats not the kind of girl you want to be connected to as a wife, and some chicks never grow out of that phase.

[Nowak]

(03-05-2017 07:05 PM)kaotic Wrote:  

(03-05-2017 10:51 AM)The Beast1 Wrote:  

Honestly, outside of the big cities: yes it is. Go to a city that has under 100,000 people. The ones that don't run off to the big city are the ones that got married young.

Go live in fly over country for a while. It's a whole different world out there.

I'll give you most of that, but also temptation is a click away.

Quote:

There are ways to arm men with the knowledge of what bad women look like without encouraging one to go out and take a sampling. The only reason we had to go out and do the sampling was because of the destruction of such knowledge by the left. The constant "red pilling" going on out there is quickly forcing this knowledge back into the public's psyche.

Paper Tigers.

If you don't have experience dating or being in relationships or with women then that's all that is.

It's not actual EXPERIENCES.

Even some "good" women turn out rotten.

I'm not saying go out and bang every single thing on two legs for this guy.

You can read theory and learn game but you also need to apply it.

Quote:

If anything, the advice of, "Go out and see what you like" is helping contribute to the decline of good women in the world.

The decline of good women, was because of feminism, weak men, and cultural Marxism.

A good women will be a good women with or without player's in the picture.

Quote:

I'll repeat it again: if you're young (under 22) and you've found a women that respects you, cooks for you, wants to run a home, wants children, and is a virgin you've hit the lottery. You will rarely be able to find a girl like that again.

While I agree with most of this - this is also somewhat of a pedastalization.

Like I mentioned this before, I don't think this is the case for him.

Quote:

Most men aren't going to have the skills to bang 18 year old virgins as an older man. The men who claim that they can are the exception, not the rule.

This forum IS the exception, this is what I'm basing my views on, not the general male population.

Quote:

Women are water and their experiences are the glass. The earlier you get them, the sooner you can mold them into what you want. The knowledge we posses here can restore the old dating customs of the past.

I 100% do agree with this.

Quote:

If we want to avoid this dystopian future for our children, it's time we start encouraging people to stay for good in healthy and functional relationships as young as possible.

I said before, most men are built for this, I can't say the same for this forum.


I have nothing against him moving to be with this girl - just don't throw caution into the wind.

I also think we need more details about how this was dropped into his lap and her reaction when her parents told her to move home - those 2 things by themselves would speak volumes.

I've met several women who've become embittered, only want to fool around and nothing serious as a defense mechanism from being burned several times. Players have always existed ,but to say there's zero impact from tolerating or sometimes even promoting infidelity is foolish. Events can change you for better or worse. What doesn't kill you won't always make you stronger. Especially when your brain is still forming before the age of 25.

There's a reason why Stefan Molyneux is against all forms of child violence.

Game is a tool to get what you want out of life. For most people, maybe not most on this forum, that means finding a partner. One's ability to pair bond can be hurt ,women of course are more affected than men but men can still make relationships and ''liking'' women harder. Everyone needs to do what will bring them emotional and spiritual satisfaction.

There are no clear cut rules 100% of the time

[Off The Reservation]

^

[puckerman]

(03-02-2017 03:16 PM)Deadlifts Wrote:  

I'm 22, she's 20. 4 years together and she's a fucking good one. BJ's on command, cooks, cleans for me. She's very well spoken and intelligent, takes care of herself and holds a boner inducing feminine energy almost 24/7.

You have survived a turbulent time in your lives and have been together for four years. This one might be a keeper just because of that. How often are you getting a blowjob, by the way? Do you reciprocate?

Quote:

She moved to Michigan to be with me after doing long distance, but her parents are literally forcing her to move back to South Carolina.

She is from a "backward" state. These states are some of the few states left wear marriage and family are still taken seriously. Does she have a lot of divorce in her family? Or is she surrounded by women who believe that marriage is "death do us part"?

How much and how often does this girl shit-test you?

Quote:

1. Stick out an LDR with my girlfriend for minimum 6 months while I visit her or vice versa every so often.

You will start missing the blowjobs on command and look for them elsewhere.

Quote:

2. Go with her to SC, (is this a beta move?) I have a decent job but it's definitely not my passion by any means, I'm not exactly giving up a whole lot in Michigan besides a close knit family. But I feel by me chasing after her it makes me look weak.

The power definitely shifts when one moves for the other. I've plenty of relationships end after a move.

At the same time, you will be going to her turf. This is a chance to find out what she has been like growing up. You will meet guys she was in grade school and high school with. You will have a chance to learn about what kind of girl she really is. You will learn about her past sexual experiences, if any.

Finally, let's face it. Michigan is a shithole. I fucking hate snow. The state is bankrupt and has been for years. You are certainly better off in South Carolina.

Make it a trade off. Move to South Carolina, but tell her you want more out of the relationship. More blowjobs would be a good way to start.

[puckerman]

(03-02-2017 05:14 PM)Deadlifts Wrote:  

Her debt is not entirely from the accident, she got a house with 2 other girls who come to find out are just low lives that don't pay rent, she works crazy hours at work and pays for majority of the bills. She also covers the other two girls rent when they don't have the money yet. Now her car is totaled, she's in a really shitty situation and is stressed as hell over everything. This, and given the fact she's only 20 years old I don't blame her for wanting to run back to Mom and Dad who she hasn't seen in almost two years. I've never given her any money to pay off debt, but I do what I can to make her life less stressful (take her out, fuck her like a porn star, workout together, ect. ect.) She keeps telling me how much she wants to make this work between us, and she's done so much already. Feelsbadman

It sounds like to me she lets people take advantage of her. She's "too nice." Her parents are one thing that can help her out of this mess. When you marry a girl, you will take on all her debts. Let her parents help her out and instead of assuming them yourself.

You also can't underestimate the kind of PTSD that can come from a bad auto accident. I experienced one in my 20's, and it really messed me up big time. Your girl is going through that, and it's not her fault.

For some women, this would be a huge shit test. I think this girl is for real. Go with her.

If this girl were from a more progressive state, I might be more worried. She's from South Carolina. That's a big reason to stick with her.

[puckerman]

(03-02-2017 07:33 PM)Deadlifts Wrote:  

I make $18/hr, being 22 with no school that's decent money for the midwest. But I'm in manufacturing, I don't care for what I do and I certainly don't see myself sticking in it long term. Being as young as I am part of me does want to jump on board and just go. Even if things fail I still have the life experience, now is the time to do it before I get older and set into a more serious career. On the other hand....I'm walking away from $18/hr which has given me a fairly comfortable lifestyle.

You are doing quite well for 22. Do you think you can find something like that when you move? Will this be available to you if you leave and go back later? Is this a company you see yourself spending your life with?

Is there something else you want to do with your life?

It does sound like maybe her parents are trying to force to "pop the question." Parents do this kind of shit.

Also, have you been anywhere else in your life? Or have you never left Michigan? This might be a good opportunity to get out and experience another part of the country.

[Off The Reservation]

update?

[Off The Reservation]

Another one that asks for advice then skips town. Literally, to South Carolina.

[iknowexactly]

(03-02-2017 05:40 PM)Steelex Wrote:  

1. Never move for a woman.

2. None of your relationships mean a goddamn fucking thing until you get one pregnant, and then you're dealing with real shit. If you have to inconvenience yourself any more than say, helping her move a sofa, then just no.

I really like "never move for a woman." Women exist to help you with YOUR goals unless she's a Joni Mitchell level genius

But my favorite:
1) never believe excuses
2) what she's tells you is a reason is an excuse
3) never accept what she's says, ie "her parents are forcing her to move" should be heard and stated as "SHE SAYS her parents are..."

THAT BEING SAID, this is not an out and out betrayal. You can say you understand, you'll miss her, she's welcome back etc while you are working on other women. She 'll probably fade away and blame it on you.
There's always a chance she'll come back and say "please fuck a baby into me." That's always fun. But don't count on it at all.

[orythedog]

(03-02-2017 03:16 PM)Deadlifts Wrote:  

I'm 22, she's 20. 4 years together and she's a fucking good one. BJ's on command, cooks, cleans for me. She's very well spoken and intelligent, takes care of herself and holds a boner inducing feminine energy almost 24/7.

She moved to Michigan to be with me after doing long distance, but her parents are literally forcing her to move back to South Carolina. They are coming to pick her up in a month and have already bought the plane ticket. Reason being is she got in a car accident and is in deep debt. She will move back to SC for minimum of 6-12 months....however, I'm not sure if I want to do long distance again. It's difficult, and there's always the possibility of her cheating on me and I not knowing. While I do not believe she'd do this, I don't want to be in unicorn denial, and in an LDR the chance is exponentially higher, given that I'm not there much.

So my options are,
1. Stick out an LDR with my girlfriend for minimum 6 months while I visit her or vice versa every so often.

2. Go with her to SC, (is this a beta move?) I have a decent job but it's definitely not my passion by any means, I'm not exactly giving up a whole lot in Michigan besides a close knit family. But I feel by me chasing after her it makes me look weak...

3. Break it off with her.

What would you guys do?

I need some outside perspective in case I'm blinded by oneitis here.

OP, do you hear that LOUD noise? That's opportunity knocking. Use the time apart from each other to diversify your pussy portfolio.

____________________________________________________________
Sometimes I take notes, sometimes I take hostages. It depends on the day.

[Gmac]

(03-02-2017 03:16 PM)Deadlifts Wrote:  

I'm 22, she's 20. 4 years together and she's a fucking good one. BJ's on command, cooks, cleans for me. She's very well spoken and intelligent, takes care of herself and holds a boner inducing feminine energy almost 24/7.

She moved to Michigan to be with me after doing long distance, but her parents are literally forcing her to move back to South Carolina. They are coming to pick her up in a month and have already bought the plane ticket. Reason being is she got in a car accident and is in deep debt. She will move back to SC for minimum of 6-12 months....however, I'm not sure if I want to do long distance again. It's difficult, and there's always the possibility of her cheating on me and I not knowing. While I do not believe she'd do this, I don't want to be in unicorn denial, and in an LDR the chance is exponentially higher, given that I'm not there much.

So my options are,
1. Stick out an LDR with my girlfriend for minimum 6 months while I visit her or vice versa every so often.

2. Go with her to SC, (is this a beta move?) I have a decent job but it's definitely not my passion by any means, I'm not exactly giving up a whole lot in Michigan besides a close knit family. But I feel by me chasing after her it makes me look weak...

3. Break it off with her.

What would you guys do?

I need some outside perspective in case I'm blinded by oneitis here.

At 22, you're way to young to be moving with a girl across the country. Unless you can say, right now, that you're ready and committed to marrying this chick, let her go. Maybe keep her on the backburner.

[Deadlifts]

(03-14-2017 09:07 AM)Off The Reservation Wrote:  

update?

I'm still deciding, some seriously great and thought provoking reply's in this thread. It seems to be fairly divided, and I've had several members inbox me telling me to hang onto this girl. However this goes and whatever I learn, I'll be sure to share my experience with those interested. As of right now, I plan on keeping her but staying in Michigan to work on myself. I will give her at least a month in SC by herself and see how that goes.

[Vaun]

(03-19-2017 01:55 PM)Deadlifts Wrote:  

As of right now, I plan on keeping her but staying in Michigan to work on myself. I will give her at least a month in SC by herself and see how that goes.

You have made the right choice.

Always remember this: she doesn't love you enough to stay with you. You want a girl like that?

Please ignore the desperate, lonely men imploring you to run after this girl. Bear in mind this is a message board about how to pick up women, my guess is that the men telling you this are losers who can not get a woman otherwise. So of course they would tell you to follow a girl that doesn't love you. Most of the men defending that position in this thread were low repped newbie posters anyway, so that makes sense. I would guess a lot of them are broke or married, need a GF to help pay the rent, and most of all, can not fathom how to get another girlfriend. Its really a shame to think about how far this boards new membership has sunk, when new members are giving a young man such awful life advice.

This attitude and position about chasing a little clueless girl around, as if thats the destiny of your life, is everything this board has stood against for years. The newer members giving you this feedback are damaging to your future. I hope all of them quit and go away, and I will call out each one as they spew this idiocy.

You have made the right choice. Its time to focus on yourself, your job, your education and your enjoyment in life. What do you need a GF for anyway? Soon enough another, more amazing women will be back in your life.

[Nascimento]

She obviously cares about you. But I also think she would move heaven and earth to make ends meet with you. I don't remember your OP clearly, but even if she was forced to come back home for some time, she would do what she can there to settle her business before being able to return. If it has to do with her parents, I think it's irrelevant. She's an adult so she can make her own decisions. Her parents would have to live by it.

Worst-case scenario, keep your chin up. As mentioned you're still young, only a year younger than myself. I've been mostly single since I entered the dating market in my late teens, trust me when I tell you it does get better with each year. As long as you're working on yourself, but that's beating a dead horse in this thread.

[Svoboda]

Is this not a way to get you to live together with her?
Her living/housing situation sounds shit.

[asdfk]

Hey vaun. Calling new, contributing members names, like "broke" or "not able to get a girlfriend", just because they contribute a different perspective... What a disdain you show here. Is your bitterness THE convincing argument for OP?

[CleanSlate]

(03-20-2017 05:40 AM)asdfk Wrote:  

Hey vaun. Calling new, contributing members names, like "broke" or "not able to get a girlfriend", just because they contribute a different perspective... What a disdain you show here. Is your bitterness THE convincing argument for OP?

Hang on, before we write Vaun off as "bitter" (which, for the record, I don't think he is) -- answer me this question.

How are these guys PM'ing the OP telling him to go after this girl "contributing a different perspective" on this forum if we can't read it?

Why don't they post it here for all to see, and not via PM? Hmm?