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Coming home on R and R leave
#1

Coming home on R and R leave

Yo whats up? I come home from Iraq next month on Mid-Deployment leave, and I was wondering what everyone's advice is on using my being a deployed soldier to my advantage. Would this be a big advantage? How should I use it? I never was very successful with women before, because I was like 250 pounds and not very social at all, but every since I lost a load of weight in basic training, and became a little more assertive, I've been getting SOME female attention, the bad thing is, its usually fat/ugly girls.
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#2

Coming home on R and R leave

If you have Charm and Charisma, you should be fine. If you don't have that, then go to Tijuana with all of the other folk and live it up for $50!
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#3

Coming home on R and R leave

Hmm I dont know. Im not the most charming guy, but I'm not a boring loser either. Somewhere in the middle of the spectrum. And I dont really have time to go down to Mexico, I have a lot of personal problems that came up while I was on deployment that I have to take care of.
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#4

Coming home on R and R leave

You need to develop some approach skills perhaps.

Be boring. Don't pressure yourself too much to be charming or exciting. That comes when you are relaxed.

But first you will need to take care of some your issues that came up on deployment. These can actually be good, because they may give you a depth lacking in other men once you master them.

"For the true meaning of victory ask the defeated warrior"
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#5

Coming home on R and R leave

What do you mean by take care of issues that came up on deployment?

I dont really know what to expect when I get home. Im used to my life as a fat, college programmer. Girls liked my personality, and shared a lot of shit with me, but I guess didnt find me attractive. I dont know if I am really that attractive now, but I'm sure after losing 60 pounds and being in good enough shape to run 2 miles in 14:30 minutes, that I'm a world better off than I was before.

I never had a problem with shyness per se, actually it seemed to be a little of the opposite. I was really good friends with a lot of hot chicks but they never saw more in me than that.

Once, I was messing around with this friend of mine in college, after I got back from basic. She invited me to her place, and I started a tickle-fight. She goes into her room, takes off her shoes, and stands on her bed. I follow her into her room, tickle her, wrestle with her (quite rough actually) and she actually liked it. When I pulled her pants off she said "What are you doing!" in a suprised but not really angry voice, then pulled her pants back up. We wrestled a little longer, and i licked her belly and her neck and shit, and was trying to get to business, and she just goes. "Ah that was so much fun! Well i gotta go to my parents house to do laundry". She never asked me to stop ANYTHING. She even at one point said "Don't make me sit on your face!" Which i replied "I think ill like that..." So i asked her "We gonna finish this tomorrow?" And she was all like "Yeah! We sure are!" (And she was serious, I know this girl.) Well when I come the next day, she had a friend over that spent the night and it seemed obvious to me that the girl I was trying to get with invited her over as an excuse to not do anything with me. Instead of letting me sleep in her bed, like I had been, she asked me if I was going to sleep on the couch or go home. I was like fuck it and said I'm going home.
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#6

Coming home on R and R leave

I suggest listening to some audio from David De Angelo. It sounds like to me some of his basic products would be beneficial and cheaper than therapy.

"For the true meaning of victory ask the defeated warrior"
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#7

Coming home on R and R leave

Why would I need to go to a therapist? I aint a little bitch lol. Anyways, so how should I play off my deployment? A lot of chicks act like they don't wanna hear about the military.
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#8

Coming home on R and R leave

Military is subjective related to politics, politician, moralism, and even sexism. It is a boring topic to me as it will exists for long time, authority, freedom or not. As twigman suggests it, listen to some audio from David De Angelo.

It is suck that I cannot use audiobook or listening to talkative, since I am hard of hearing as I always use closed caption/ subtitles and read the lyrics to caught up.(It is irrelevant, I know.)
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#9

Coming home on R and R leave

I didn't write what i did very well perhaps.

1) I thought you said you had personal issues that came up on deployment. Sorry if I got this wrong. I assume soldiers in war zones kill people and watch their buddies getting killed. Anyway my assumption when you said you had some personal issues come up due to active service. Maybe I got this wrong.

2) Have you ever been the subject of a woman's fantasy? And if not, why not. And this may require some work from you to get this part of your life sorted out.

Some basic audio on the way attraction works would be good. Not routines. You're in the friendzone with some girl and you rip off her pants, and she doesn't slap you, and thats like an indicator of interest... no it ain't.

"For the true meaning of victory ask the defeated warrior"
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#10

Coming home on R and R leave

OH! I see what you mean, no no. I had a grandparent die, and another is near death and I have to get everything in order, and I had some fellow soldiers steal over 2000 dollars from me but I got that sorted out. I didn't realize how I had worded that, my bad.

Well what I meant about that girl is, the whole time I was licking her all over and she was acting like it was turning her on. She was like "OHHH THATS DRIVING ME CRAZY!" And she was getting off the bed, to get a break from it all i guess, and I tried to pull her back up there, and i had ahold of her pants, and they slid right off. She was like "What are you doing!" but it was in a total suprised yet not negative way. I told her "Well it aint like I'm just gonna let you get away" and then we wrestled some more, and she said she had to go somewhere and I told her I'd see her later.

The whole IOI to me, was after I initiated the playfighting in her den and she went into her room, and took off her shoes and got on the bed, not to mention the whole "Don't make me sit on your face!" and stuff like that. Plus she was always asking me sexual questions like when I started jerking off and stuff, and even confided in me early on "Ive never cum through sex before".
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#11

Coming home on R and R leave

Thats fine, I guess you've experienced loss. I have had experienced that too, its sad, and can make for some different energies. Actually you can use your experience of loss to connect to women... this is not some kind of thing you have to hide. You can use what are potentially non-sexy experiences to form deep rapport and comfort with women, once you've established some initial attraction.

Sounds like maybe she was scared of where she might go the night afterward, if she let you just do what you wanted. If you're going in a straight line, the chick is going to try and throw you off. This is completely anti-intuitive, because if as guys we were horny we would get it on. But because girls deal on emotional levels about sex - and I don't even know if that covers how illogical and anti-intuitive it all is. Although I am not a big fan of the pua mainsteam, the shit-test is deinitely something I see. And that means one of the shit-tests is girls back pedaling to see how you will react, and putting obstacles in your way (like 'the friend')

"For the true meaning of victory ask the defeated warrior"
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#12

Coming home on R and R leave

No it's not a big advantage, or even an advantage. No more say than being a lawyer or a financial analyst. If you spin it right it can make you interesting, especially if you have stories, but don't drop this thinking it will make girls hot for you alone.
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#13

Coming home on R and R leave

from my experience a lot of chicks ( although it does depend) really dig army guys...you tell 'em that your in the army (even the reserves will do) and they're all over you so long as your decent looking. Im obviously not in the army but I have many friends up here in Canada who are and they have the chicks all over them with seemingly no effort at all.
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#14

Coming home on R and R leave

Well ive got like 5 girls ive met online that say they wanna hang out, and a couple even say they wanna fuck, but I'm gonna see what happens when I go home.
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