[PoetryOfEros]

I keep wanting to start doing approaches and feel like I need to get my life in order first. Everytime I get to the point where I feel I want to take action I find information about WHY I need to sort out my life, fix your fashion, improve body image, make a decent lifestyle, lift weights, create a social circle, do online game, get good at texting, get good at tinder, start having threesomes, start running a harem, but first I need to sort out my inner game. It's very disconcerting and a lot of opposing information on the net when all I want to do is start taking action. It's like you find the inner game information, then you read it, then you feel you need to sort your life out, then they say 'Just go out'. It's kind of convoluted and all over the place. Do I really need to sort out all these Inner Game issues before I start talking to women? I want to meet new friends.

The thing is I see the reasoning behind sorting out the inner game things. If you want to meet new people then you want to put your best foot forward. But what if it's going to take time to get there? Some guys are more fucked up than that. Some guys find it easy because they are 60% the way there already. What if you have been out of the game for years or what if you've just poked around at game and never took it seriously?

What is there to learn with Inner Game? It seems like every f*cking guru out there has there own bullshit views about inner game. It's such an ambiguous term. Do you really need to have your shit handled in that department first? I've met guys who have beta tendencies who do well with women. I've met guys with bad breath do well with women. Surely those are inner game problems.

To me inner game is all the damned basic stuff that it takes to be a presentable human in a professional social world. To me inner game is knowing how you think and what is the right thing to think. This is ambiguous. does this mean I should start teaching guys that they have inner game issues because they don't look or think like me?

I find the whole inner game school as a kind of byproduct of cultlike thinking. Most inner game stuff is based on the guru's teaching from their perspective. Who wants to buy a $199 audio program telling you inner game is about confidence if you're already confident?

I don't know guys. I find inner game stuff a bit weird sometimes. I've come to dislike the meditation bullshit because I learned meditation as a Ju Jitsu and Aikido Student in my teens. It seems like such a waste of time to learn meditation when I'm happy with the results I get from my own knowledge of meditation.

I don't want to spend 55 minutes listening to some creepy hypnotist telling me how to think, I don't want to know NLP bullshit, I don't want to be a Buddhist monk or get rid of my ego (it's in the brain for a reason), and I certainly don't want some dude who claims to have a better life than me tell me how to think. This may seem counterintuitive.

So what's the word? What is worth learning when it comes to inner game? I don't want some delusional grandiose ego trip reframe of myself either. What actually matters when it comes to inner game?

[Latan]

"Inner Game" only means to have your shit together, a healthy body and mind, so enjoy life and your confidence is high.
This way other people (sexy young females) sense it and enjoy your presence.

I am under the impression that you don't have clear goals right now, which frustrates you.

[wi30]

You're completely overthinking it. Reading the inner game section of Bang is all you need to know.

It's all about confidence. How do you view yourself relative to your friends, colleagues, or the general population?

Inner game is about knowing your value and projecting that value accordingly. When you're genuinely confident in yourself and your abilities, you don't worry about making eye contact or having a solid handshake. Those things just come naturally.

When you don't have your shit together, you worry about your posture, presence, or conversational ability. When you have things going for you, you're too busy reading other people to notice what you're doing.

Get off the internet and start making moves in real life. You'll look back on this and laugh in 6 months.

[nek]

Everytime I get to the point where I feel I want to take action I find information about WHY I need to sort out my life, fix your fashion, improve body image, make a decent lifestyle, lift weights, create a social circle, do online game, get good at texting, get good at tinder, start having threesomes, start running a harem, but first I need to sort out my inner game. It's like you find the inner game information, then you read it, then you feel you need to sort your life out, then they say 'Just go out'. It's kind of convoluted and all over the place. Do I really need to sort out all these Inner Game issues before I start talking to women? I want to meet new friends.

The thing is I see the reasoning behind sorting out the inner game things. If you want to meet new people then you want to put your best foot forward.
What is there to learn with Inner Game? It seems like every f*cking guru out there has there own bullshit views about inner game. It's such an ambiguous term.
To me inner game is all the damned basic stuff that it takes to be a presentable human in a professional social world. To me inner game is knowing how you think and what is the right thing to think. This is ambiguous. does this mean I should start teaching guys that they have inner game issues because they don't look or think like me?

I find the whole inner game school as a kind of byproduct of cultlike thinking. Most inner game stuff is based on the guru's teaching from their perspective. Who wants to buy a $199 audio program telling you inner game is about confidence if you're already confident?

I don't know guys. I find inner game stuff a bit weird sometimes. I've come to dislike the meditation bullshit because I learned meditation as a Ju Jitsu and Aikido Student in my teens. It seems like such a waste of time to learn meditation when I'm happy with the results I get from my own knowledge of meditation.

I don't want to spend 55 minutes listening to some creepy hypnotist telling me how to think, I don't want to know NLP bullshit, I don't want to be a Buddhist monk or get rid of my ego (it's in the brain for a reason), and I certainly don't want some dude who claims to have a better life than me tell me how to think. This may seem counterintuitive.

So what's the word? What is worth learning when it comes to inner game? I don't want some delusional grandiose ego trip reframe of myself either. What actually matters when it comes to inner game?
[/quote]

"God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, And wisdom to know the difference."

THis is what inner game is. But to be more specific:

(01-10-2017 12:30 AM)PoetryOfEros Wrote:  

I keep wanting to start doing approaches and feel like I need to get my life in order first.

Refer to my signature below.

Quote:

It's very disconcerting and a lot of opposing information on the net when all I want to do is start taking action.

Start taking action to get your shit in order. You'll need to feel good about yourself before things are going to get better with women.

Quote:

Do you really need to have your shit handled in that department first? I've met guys who have beta tendencies who do well with women. I've met guys with bad breath do well with women. Surely those are inner game problems.

Beta tendencies, depending on degree, can be overlooked if other attributes make up for it, esp. in the beginning, by women. Plus "tendencies" doesn't = beta, and it doesn't mean they aren't comfortable in their own skin. Bad breath is a hygiene problem, not an inner game problem.

Quote:

But what if it's going to take time to get there? Some guys are more fucked up than that. Some guys find it easy because they are 60% the way there already. What if you have been out of the game for years or what if you've just poked around at game and never took it seriously?

.

I mean this in a very constructive manner, but do you see how ridiculous this sounds? Yes, things take time, and more time for others than some. Some guys are going to have had a better adolescent experience than you, resulting in greater confidence than you. You're simply complaining about life not being fair, about how much more work you have to do than others. While, I admit, the unfairness of life can bother me at points too, this isn't anything you can act on. Focus on actionable improvement steps.

You sound like you're suffering from paralysis by analysis. You never will know everything, and some things will only be learned via experience.

[LeoneVolpe]

(01-10-2017 12:30 AM)PoetryOfEros Wrote:  

I keep wanting to start doing approaches and feel like I need to get my life in order first. Everytime I get to the point where I feel I want to take action I find information about WHY I need to sort out my life, fix your fashion, improve body image, make a decent lifestyle, lift weights, create a social circle, do online game, get good at texting, get good at tinder, start having threesomes, start running a harem, but first I need to sort out my inner game. It's very disconcerting and a lot of opposing information on the net when all I want to do is start taking action. It's like you find the inner game information, then you read it, then you feel you need to sort your life out, then they say 'Just go out'. It's kind of convoluted and all over the place. Do I really need to sort out all these Inner Game issues before I start talking to women? I want to meet new friends.

This is a classic blunder. It's called "preparing to prepare." If you feel the need to wait until everything's "just right" before making a move, you'll be waiting the rest of your life. Just get out there, take risks, fuck up, learn from it, begin again more intelligently. Additionally, learn from other RVF men's experiences so you don't have to learn every lesson the hard way.

Quote:

“Think of it this way: There are two kinds of failure. The first comes from never trying out your ideas because you are afraid, or because you are waiting for the perfect time. This kind of failure you can never learn from, and such timidity will destroy you. The second kind comes from a bold and venturesome spirit. If you fail in this way, the hit that you take to your reputation is greatly outweighed by what you learn. Repeated failure will toughen your spirit and show you with absolute clarity how things must be done.”
― Robert Greene, Mastery

[XXL]

Inner game is fancy word for what's going on in your head in the context of game.

I think it's good to educate on health, money, women and world in general to yourself to broaden your mental horizons and learn what others learned before us. You can really get perspective on life and develop your mind. Certain books allow you to learn effective things right away without spending 30 years of life to figure it out. Some cliche examples... How to win friends and influence people, Mastery, Way of superior man, 7 habits of highly effective people. Books like those have concepts that would take you a lifetime to discover. Now you can read it, apply it and see tangible results. I guess we call call it working on inner game. However it has to go hand with hand with some real life action.

Let's take game. It's useless to learn about game and try to mindfuck yourself to become bulletproof alpha pimp deluxe and not taking any action. You will not remember everything in real life random situations when you need to think fast on your feet. Too much knowledge in your head without the context and first hand experience backing it up will will only make you weird just like you say. Positive mindset shifts need real life experience to happen but it's still nice to know what to expect beforehand.

[PoetryOfEros]

Quote:

You're completely overthinking it. Reading the inner game section of Bang is all you need to know.

It's all about confidence. How do you view yourself relative to your friends, colleagues, or the general population?

Relative to friends it's like I'm invisible. Colleagues? I could improve. General Population>Average Nobody. I'll be sure to read the Internal Game section more closely (and Pre Approach), thanks.

Quote:

While, I admit, the unfairness of life can bother me at points too, this isn't anything you can act on. Focus on actionable improvement steps.

Gold, thanks.

Quote:

PoetryOfEros Wrote:
I keep wanting to start doing approaches and feel like I need to get my life in order first. Everytime I get to the point where I feel I want to take action I find information about WHY I need to sort out my life, fix your fashion, improve body image, make a decent lifestyle, lift weights, create a social circle, do online game, get good at texting, get good at tinder, start having threesomes, start running a harem, but first I need to sort out my inner game. It's very disconcerting and a lot of opposing information on the net when all I want to do is start taking action. It's like you find the inner game information, then you read it, then you feel you need to sort your life out, then they say 'Just go out'. It's kind of convoluted and all over the place. Do I really need to sort out all these Inner Game issues before I start talking to women? I want to meet new friends.

This is a classic blunder. It's called "preparing to prepare." If you feel the need to wait until everything's "just right" before making a move, you'll be waiting the rest of your life. Just get out there, take risks, fuck up, learn from it, begin again more intelligently. Additionally, learn from other RVF men's experiences so you don't have to learn every lesson the hard way.

Quote:
“Think of it this way: There are two kinds of failure. The first comes from never trying out your ideas because you are afraid, or because you are waiting for the perfect time. This kind of failure you can never learn from, and such timidity will destroy you. The second kind comes from a bold and venturesome spirit. If you fail in this way, the hit that you take to your reputation is greatly outweighed by what you learn. Repeated failure will toughen your spirit and show you with absolute clarity how things must be done.”
― Robert Greene, Mastery

Thanks for the quote, really makes sense. Preparing to prepare, I guess that kind of fits too.

Quote:

Let's take game. It's useless to learn about game and try to mindfuck yourself to become bulletproof alpha pimp deluxe and not taking any action. You will not remember everything in real life random situations when you need to think fast on your feet. Too much knowledge in your head without the context and first hand experience backing it up will will only make you weird just like you say. Positive mindset shifts need real life experience to happen but it's still nice to know what to expect beforehand.

This is what ISN'T bothering me. I'm sure I can act in the moment regardless. 'Bulletproof alpha pimp deluxe and not taking any action' really gotta laugh at that but yeah point taken.

Support much welcomed and appreciated fellow RVF users. Think I'll just stick with Bang Internal Game chapters and get out there.

[Prof. Ligate]

Looks money status + confidence = inner game

Work on them continually and everything will sort itself out

/thread

[Alche]

I have one question. Do you watch porn?

-If yes, then the artificial spikes in dopamine are damaging you. Stop watching porn, block all the websites with a browser extension. This will by itself make a huge difference in your life.

-Next, realise that inner game is not some strategy or thing to learn. It is actually unlearning, removing the barriers and forgetting the past. Books and resources on this topic are just the sign posts to help you. Try to have a mind like a gold fish. Forget the past and just focus right now on who you want to be.. and be that person.

Life is fun, we will all be dead someday, so it's best to go after what we want despite what others think.

Quote:

Looks money status + confidence = inner game

Work on them continually and everything will sort itself out

I disagree with this. Inner game is not an event. It's a process. These things may help a person but what are they without them? Are they now insecure?

OP, Realise that the only thing holding you back right now are your inner beliefs. Change these and other things in your life will start falling into place.

[ksbms]

Either you do want to get laid or you don't. It's that simple. Either you bang that hottie strutting down the street, or someone else will. Only through practice you'll reach that goal. It's like driving a car. Procedural memory needs emobodied action (although imagining situations and how'd you act post-factum helps too, activating the same brain areas, as research shows). What I do when I want to get laid, I put shoes and my jacket on and leave my house. Then, immediately, it's game on.

Example: yesterday, I was heading early morning to the train station and had limited time. Still, a sexy girl with two big suitcases crossed the street, I made my pitch and found out she came to study for one semester. I didn't succeed but I did my job and didn't regret it. I still caught my train.

So put your shoes and jacket on and leave the house right now. The results will come to you. Not immediately, but they will.

[panknows24]

Not sure if this will help OP or not, it's also a bit heavy but has worked for me. And this goes for beyond just gaming girls. All my other social interactions have improved due to this.

"You're going to die one day. Why not do whatever the fuck you want to do. Why is whatever that's stopping you stopping you from doing what you want to do."

Fortune favours the bold.

[PoetryOfEros]

Quote:

Looks money status + confidence = inner game

Work on them continually and everything will sort itself out

I guess it's better to keep it simple, there's a lot goes into each of those. Thanks.

Quote:

I have one question. Do you watch porn?

-If yes, then the artificial spikes in dopamine are damaging you. Stop watching porn, block all the websites with a browser extension. This will by itself make a huge difference in your life.

-Next, realise that inner game is not some strategy or thing to learn. It is actually unlearning, removing the barriers and forgetting the past. Books and resources on this topic are just the sign posts to help you. Try to have a mind like a gold fish. Forget the past and just focus right now on who you want to be.. and be that person.

Life is fun, we will all be dead someday, so it's best to go after what we want despite what others think.

Occasionally watch porn, I'm not addicted, I don't do it compulsively. I have a child filter on my internet so I don't usually use porn much. Also, I find like @Cernovich says in Gorilla Mindset "I don't feel horny before watching porn, only once I watched it do I feel horny, so it's pointless." (Rough paraphrasing)

Being like a goldfish is something I've done for a while now and I agree with how it works and it's usefulness, thanks. As for sign posts, I'm guessing I'm not looking at the big picture as I'm interested in results, thanks for the reminder.

I will hasten my progress if I can. I know we don't live forever.

Quote:

Either you do want to get laid or you don't. It's that simple. Either you bang that hottie strutting down the street, or someone else will. Only through practice you'll reach that goal.

There's still no guarantee of that.

Quote:

So put your shoes and jacket on and leave the house right now. The results will come to you. Not immediately, but they will.

One of the laziest pieces of game advice I've noticed as of recent years is the mantr "Just Go Out". What if someone has been going out all this time and NOT getting the results they want? Should they 'Just Go Out'?

Quote:

"You're going to die one day. Why not do whatever the fuck you want to do. Why is whatever that's stopping you stopping you from doing what you want to do."

Fortune favours the bold.

Not sure I'd like to categorize that as 'Heavy' but nice quote, thanks.