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Buying a bottle of wine for going round
#1

Buying a bottle of wine for going round

Hi,

Ive been on two dates with a plate and on the second I ended up going back to her place, totally her idea, we didnt have sex or kiss yet... but she has been giving hints at me coming round for the 3rd date round there, playing board games, watching a tv series.

My question is I was going to buy a bottle of wine to bring over, I dont drink myself (at all) so I would be buying it for her. I have read that you should not buy a plate things until you've had sex, but believe this would increase the chances. Or should I assume she will have her own? Does the advice only apply to flowers / presents? I do not want to seem too nice to buy this for her.

Also a bit conscious we havent kissed yet, there's been kino both ways on both dates, she has been initiating texting with me the next day, and I have invaded her personal space a few times but Ive not been able to get the kiss.
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#2

Buying a bottle of wine for going round

If she's inviting you over then she's attracted to you. You don't need alcohol. Just make your move. You need to practice escalating and making your moves again and again without alcohol.

Also if she's hosting you at her place, there's nothing wrong with bringing something for you both to share. When someone invites me over for dinner I always bring a nice bottle of wine or desert. That's just common courtesy.
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#3

Buying a bottle of wine for going round

Quote: (12-30-2016 09:47 PM)wonderer1 Wrote:  

Also a bit conscious we havent kissed yet, there's been kino both ways on both dates, she has been initiating texting with me the next day, and I have invaded her personal space a few times but Ive not been able to get the kiss.


[Image: cPKWZB2aaB3rO.gif]

Sure, bring wine, but bust a move dammit. If you get shot down, don't get butthurt. Just regroup, and try again later (that night). Unless she kicks you out.

But then, you'll know for certain.

Girls get in each other's personal spaces all the time, and do kino. They don't kiss though. If you don't make a move you're going to turn into one of her girlfriends.

Girlfriends don't penetrate each other with their penises.

Don't be her girlfriend.
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#4

Buying a bottle of wine for going round

Thanks guys. Will be bringing the wine as a courtesy. I've been trying to make eye contact when I get close to her but she doesn't reciprocate. I'm finding it difficult to get that kiss. Are there any moves I can use?
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#5

Buying a bottle of wine for going round

The wine among others, will turn you into her gay friend. If that's what you're going for... Go ahead.

The board games and tv series... it already seems like it's heading down this path... Look alive out there!

I guarantee the guy who nails her doesn't do anything you're currently (and thinking of) doing.

"If she's inviting you over then she's attracted to you. You don't need alcohol. Just make your move. You need to practice escalating and making your moves again and again without alcohol."

False, I've been invited over to a chicks place and she played the "No, No, No" game all night.

Beware of attention whores. You're falling into a trap imho.
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#6

Buying a bottle of wine for going round

Quote: (12-30-2016 11:38 PM)wonderer1 Wrote:  

Thanks guys. Will be bringing the wine as a courtesy. I've been trying to make eye contact when I get close to her but she doesn't reciprocate. I'm finding it difficult to get that kiss. Are there any moves I can use?

Are you touching her when you get close? She could be shy or not even thinking about it.

You're alone with her in her place right?

When I'm close I'll just slowly pull the girl in, making eye contact and making it obvious that I'm going for a kiss. In these circumstances, sometimes she'll turn her head away, sometimes she'll go for it. No way to tell until you try.

On multiple occasions I've gone from the head turn to the cheek to a bang later by not letting it bother me.

The key is to be calm and not lose your cool if this happens. Just relax, continue the conversation, whatever, and make another opportunity happen. She could be nervous. Some girls get shit scared about these kinds of things and freeze up. Again, no way to tell. Act like it didn't happen.

If she goes for it, then explore it and see where you can take it.
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#7

Buying a bottle of wine for going round

Quote: (12-30-2016 11:41 PM)Carmichael Reid Wrote:  

The wine among others, will turn you into her gay friend. If that's what you're going for... Go ahead.

The board games and tv series... it already seems like it's heading down this path...

I guarantee the guy who nails her doesn't do anything you're currently (and thinking of) doing.

It's definitely a risk. I can't recall the last time I was at a girls place that I was interested in and I didn't make a move.

Regardless, there's only one way to find out if she's into him. If she rejects him, then at least he'll know and move on.
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#8

Buying a bottle of wine for going round

So what's your solution? I will be alone with her there not with others. Also we don't communicate outside of the dates, wouldn't an attention whore be wanting more investment from me? I think this is my last shot, but open to suggestions you have?
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#9

Buying a bottle of wine for going round

Quote: (12-30-2016 11:48 PM)philosophical_recovery Wrote:  

Quote: (12-30-2016 11:41 PM)Carmichael Reid Wrote:  

The wine among others, will turn you into her gay friend. If that's what you're going for... Go ahead.

The board games and tv series... it already seems like it's heading down this path...

I guarantee the guy who nails her doesn't do anything you're currently (and thinking of) doing.

It's definitely a risk. I can't recall the last time I was at a girls place that I was interested in and I didn't make a move.

Regardless, there's only one way to find out if she's into him. If she rejects him, then at least he'll know and move on.

Showing up as is. With a condom ready to fuck ASAP is the only way to tell.

I never read anywhere that boardgames getting any girl wet.

Hopefully he can pick up the vibe that he's getting laid. In my exp. When I get laid, it's straight to business. The longer it takes... The less likely it's happening.

Time is precious.
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#10

Buying a bottle of wine for going round

Quote: (12-30-2016 11:54 PM)Carmichael Reid Wrote:  

Quote: (12-30-2016 11:48 PM)philosophical_recovery Wrote:  

Quote: (12-30-2016 11:41 PM)Carmichael Reid Wrote:  

The wine among others, will turn you into her gay friend. If that's what you're going for... Go ahead.

The board games and tv series... it already seems like it's heading down this path...

I guarantee the guy who nails her doesn't do anything you're currently (and thinking of) doing.

It's definitely a risk. I can't recall the last time I was at a girls place that I was interested in and I didn't make a move.

Regardless, there's only one way to find out if she's into him. If she rejects him, then at least he'll know and move on.

Showing up as is. With a condom ready to fuck ASAP is the only way to tell.

I never read anywhere that boardgames getting any girl wet.

Hopefully he can pick up the vibe that he's getting laid. In my exp. When I get laid, it's straight to business. The longer it takes... The less likely it's happening.

Time is precious.

Ok ill forget the board game, yes its just me and her and yes Ive been touching her, shes been touching me too. Ill just say I couldnt find the board game but lets watch the "scary" tv show on netflix you were talking about, try and escalate from there?
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#11

Buying a bottle of wine for going round

Netflix and chill is good.
This is where the fun begins.
You gotta be a fun guy in this situation.
Building playful sexual tension.
There are girls I've lost, where I played too coy, there are girls that just will not give it up even if you're aggressive.
Those girls want to make you their boyfriend.

If you haven't done this.
Pretend you've done this before. You gotta start somewhere.
You gotta decide if you're gonna fuck her on the couch or in her bedroom.
You gotta lead even in her own house.
Yes, it's a good thing she brought you over.
But you gotta set the tone and pick up her tone the second you two lock eyes.

From there it's a matter of a) Getting some play and cutting out ASAP b) Cutting your losses and leaving. ASAP. Don't hang around.
Have some respect for yourself.
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#12

Buying a bottle of wine for going round

Quote: (12-31-2016 12:04 AM)Carmichael Reid Wrote:  

Netflix and chill is good.
This is where the fun begins.
You gotta be a fun guy in this situation.
Building playful sexual tension.
There are girls I've lost, where I played too coy, there are girls that just will not give it up even if you're aggressive.
Those girls want to make you their boyfriend.

If you haven't done this.
Pretend you've done this before. You gotta start somewhere.
You gotta decide if you're gonna fuck her on the couch or in her bedroom.
You gotta lead even in her own house.
Yes, it's a good thing she brought you over.
But you gotta set the tone and pick up her tone the second you two lock eyes.

From there it's a matter of a) Getting some play and cutting out ASAP b) Cutting your losses and leaving. ASAP. Don't hang around.
Have some respect for yourself.

Shes been asking some interesting questions which makes me think she might want to be in it for the long game - relationship. Asking about girls ive taken home to the parents, me saying my mum buys lots of gifts like perfumes for girls i take to meet them, then her saying she loves a certain kind of perfume, and her actions of not letting me kiss her yet, although agreeing to meet up for dates with me and initiating texting.
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#13

Buying a bottle of wine for going round

I bring a bottle of wine up to her place and after we drink it I surprise her and tell her to hold on because I have another bottle of wine out in my car... Im not going to just drink one bottle of wine with a women Im going to screw all night.

Im going to sleep with her wake up and screw again.
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#14

Buying a bottle of wine for going round

Stop listening to your mother! Stop buying women shit! They make fun of you losers who do weak Poindexter garbage like this!

Game is getting sex in the least amount of time with least amount of money. You got game or you don't.

You want her to be begging for more. It seems like you're doing the chasing. Kinda like a hungry puppy.
Women hate that too. They'll warp your mind to doing craaaazy things for them.

Personally, this girl doesn't even know you to even think about a relationship.
When girls REALLY like you. They use sex as their only tool to rope you in for the long term
and I mean marriage.

So honestly, like I said it doesn't look good. I think you're wasting your time. But, I'm just some guy on a forum on a Friday night...
3 strikes she's out. If it doesn't happen. Make sure you never contact this girl again.

On to the next one...
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#15

Buying a bottle of wine for going round

Quote: (12-30-2016 11:52 PM)wonderer1 Wrote:  

So what's your solution? I will be alone with her there not with others. Also we don't communicate outside of the dates, wouldn't an attention whore be wanting more investment from me? I think this is my last shot, but open to suggestions you have?

In your first post you mentioned she was texting you first the next day after your date. Isn't that communication?

The idea that a board game won't get you laid is false. Anything that makes you and the girl connect with each other allowing her to feel comfortable and close to you is going to help.

For me, I feel my strength is conversation and touching so a board game or just listening to music and talking works great. A movie is fine so long as you don't plan on really watching it. I think a board game is great because it's competitive, builds tension and provides a platform where you can tease her a little bit. Backgammon is a great game for this.

Here's a recent example of escalating:

Last night I had a young, conservative and inexperienced girl over at my apt on a second date. Went in for the kiss and got denied, she said it was too soon, needs to know me first, etc. That's when I talk with her and agree that spending time together is certainly a way of doing that but also explain how physical intimacy (touching hands, stroking her hair, and especially kissing) is another important and deeper way of knowing someone.

At this point I'm already holding her hand, stroking her hair so I go in for the kiss again, and then again, but do so slowly and finally she kisses back a little but slowly and then you just take it slow from there. Escalating your kissing to be more passionate.

After a few minutes we were hot and heavy on the bed in full makeout mode.

The girl you're seeing needs to know you want a deep, physical relationship with her, and she needs to have the sense she will lose you if she doesn't move forward. You shouldn't say that specifically, but she needs to get that sense from you. I tried bouncing that date back to my apt the first night and she said, "Maybe next time". Last night I took her to dinner and asked her again to come back to my place. Her shy response, "I guess I have to because I told you last time I might".

Damn right, she knew that if she didn't I would move on. There's no set time table to how many dates it should take, but there must be significant progress each time, and she should get that feeling from you.

Though I tried, she wasn't ready for sex last night. It might take several more dates for that to happen, but I like her so I'm willing to wait but there also needs to be deeper intimacy with each future date.
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#16

Buying a bottle of wine for going round

Quote: (12-30-2016 11:45 PM)philosophical_recovery Wrote:  

On multiple occasions I've gone from the head turn to the cheek to a bang later by not letting it bother me.

The key is to be calm and not lose your cool if this happens. Just relax, continue the conversation, whatever, and make another opportunity happen. She could be nervous. Some girls get shit scared about these kinds of things and freeze up. Again, no way to tell. Act like it didn't happen.

If the girl back out of a kiss after a date or two/kino/showing positive body language, it's very likely she just froze out of nervousness or something. It's awkward so you have to make it not awkward. I'll pull my head back real quick and say something like, "Were you trying to kiss me? I don't know if we're there yet but don't worry, we just met." with a wink or some bullshit like that. These chicks have denied kisses before and half of the time they probably went in for a kiss later that night. The worst thing you can do is make it be awkward about it.

I will echo the concern that you may be dealing with an attention whore who collects nice guys like baseball cards. If you don't make out and at least do some heavy petting, I'd back off and give her the cold shoulder for a while.
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#17

Buying a bottle of wine for going round

Quote: (12-31-2016 12:24 AM)Onto Wrote:  

Quote: (12-30-2016 11:52 PM)wonderer1 Wrote:  

So what's your solution? I will be alone with her there not with others. Also we don't communicate outside of the dates, wouldn't an attention whore be wanting more investment from me? I think this is my last shot, but open to suggestions you have?

In your first post you mentioned she was texting you first the next day after your date. Isn't that communication?

The idea that a board game won't get you laid is false. Anything that makes you and the girl connect with each other allowing her to feel comfortable and close to you is going to help.

For me, I feel my strength is conversation and touching so a board game or just listening to music and talking works great. A movie is fine so long as you don't plan on really watching it. I think a board game is great because it's competitive, builds tension and provides a platform where you can tease her a little bit. Backgammon is a great game for this.

Here's a recent example of escalating:

Last night I had a young, conservative and inexperienced girl over at my apt on a second date. Went in for the kiss and got denied, she said it was too soon, needs to know me first, etc. That's when I talk with her and agree that spending time together is certainly a way of doing that but also explain how physical intimacy (touching hands, stroking her hair, and especially kissing) is another important and deeper way of knowing someone.

At this point I'm already holding her hand, stroking her hair so I go in for the kiss again, and then again, but do so slowly and finally she kisses back a little but slowly and then you just take it slow from there. Escalating your kissing to be more passionate.

After a few minutes we were hot and heavy on the bed in full makeout mode.

The girl you're seeing needs to know you want a deep, physical relationship with her, and she needs to have the sense she will lose you if she doesn't move forward. You shouldn't say that specifically, but she needs to get that sense from you. I tried bouncing that date back to my apt the first night and she said, "Maybe next time". Last night I took her to dinner and asked her again to come back to my place. Her shy response, "I guess I have to because I told you last time I might".

Damn right, she knew that if she didn't I would move on. There's no set time table to how many dates it should take, but there must be significant progress each time, and she should get that feeling from you.

Though I tried, she wasn't ready for sex last night. It might take several more dates for that to happen, but I like her so I'm willing to wait but there also needs to be deeper intimacy with each future date.

This is exactly how it has played out with me and conservative, inexperienced girls that are in my target zone.
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#18

Buying a bottle of wine for going round

OP, listen to these guys.

Bring the boardgame, the wine, maybe even a card. Connect on the deepest romantic level.

Go on a journey with her no matter how long it takes of your valuable irreplaceable time. Better yet. Keep a diary.

Report back... With Details of the Quality of the Sex*. That's a big one. I hear inexperienced conservative girls are demons in the sack... =|

*You're taking advice from people who STILL haven't closed the deal! "Leave your ego at the door." That's a big secret to Game.
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#19

Buying a bottle of wine for going round

So I just messaged: "This game has been staring at me the whole time, Im going to teach you to play!"

she replied straight away: "are you free tonight? Im knackered from work!!"

I was thinking of saying im busy tonight (im actually free), I dont want to seem too available, but tomorrow? and asking if she found out that show was on netflix.

good approach? Or should I strike while the irons hot and go tonight and do my best to escalate
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#20

Buying a bottle of wine for going round

Go tonight and escalate.
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#21

Buying a bottle of wine for going round

Quote: (12-30-2016 11:38 PM)wonderer1 Wrote:  

Thanks guys. Will be bringing the wine as a courtesy. I've been trying to make eye contact when I get close to her but she doesn't reciprocate. I'm finding it difficult to get that kiss. Are there any moves I can use?

Yes. Have a conversation with her while sitting close to her. Look her deep in the eyes until you find a connection. Pause for a second. Then grab the nape of her neck (gently but like a man) and pull her close to you for a kiss.

Your the man. Make the move
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#22

Buying a bottle of wine for going round

Right I think this ones done, didnt want to see her tonight so said lets do tomorrow. She said she couldnt do tomorrow, there was no counter offer, I then said, I could do tonight but only at 8, she said she had to skype an old friend at 9 so to let her know at around 8 and she's see, I said dont worry, lets maybe do it another time, let me know when youre free, response from her was, sorry, lets do it sometime soon! no actual date.

Ive made mistakes, no kiss, no sex, made myself available tonight. she is showing low interest. nexting.
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#23

Buying a bottle of wine for going round

Yeah, looks like you gave off the BFF vibe a bit. I've always found caveman game works well on game-playing girls. Blast straight through her bullshit, let her know you're the man, wrestle her in the sack and after a brief struggle where she pretends you resist you have your way with her. Not every time, but the first time.
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#24

Buying a bottle of wine for going round

Quote: (01-04-2017 06:14 PM)Matsufubu Wrote:  

Yeah, looks like you gave off the BFF vibe a bit. I've always found caveman game works well on game-playing girls. Blast straight through her bullshit, let her know you're the man, wrestle her in the sack and after a brief struggle where she pretends you resist you have your way with her. Not every time, but the first time.

Do you think she was playing games? When?
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#25

Buying a bottle of wine for going round

From the start - they all do until you emerge as a serious prospect by striking when the iron is hot. You didn't and the moment passed for her.

At the start it's all shit tests, flaking, ego-pricking words...you've just got to show that you're not fooled, ZFG, go for the escalation. If you lose, you lose. Better that than the nagging pain of regret.
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