[Naughty By Nature]

(10-18-2016 03:58 AM)azulsombra Wrote:  

(10-18-2016 12:34 AM)XPQ22 Wrote:  

Also keep in mind that LA has one of the worst m/f ratios in the country. Every American city is a sausagefest by any metric you care to use in the 20-39 demographic, but LA is particularly bad.

http://jonathansoma.com/singles/#2/5/2/0

75 unmatched men per 1000 women - it's nearly as bad as tech-nerd filled Seattle or San Francisco. San Diego is worse at 125.

By comparison, NYC destroys it at 35. Even Chicago, Boston and Providence, RI are theoretical game paradises at around 40-50.

Boston's m/f spread in the 20-39 demo is only 28 unmatched men per 1000 women, and most clubs I go to never look any better than 50-50 on the best of nights. The average LA or San Francisco night spot that doesn't cater to ballers must look like gay bars. I can completely understand how guys in that environment who are above average in looks, financially secure with good game like I'm sure Balkan above is are having multiple 6es a week flake on them who are 26, barely employed, broke as fuck and don't even have a car.

Though in a sense it hardly matters because night game is pretty much dead as a doornail in the feminist-heavy Northeast. In LA SNLs with club girls is likely still actually a possibility. Baltimore and Washington, DC also look great on paper if you only look at the ratios, but we know they suck.

You think LA has decent nightgame or even better than the Northeast when bartenders are saying last call at 1:30am and flicking on the lights at 1:45? Hahaha

Single night lay in LA is really only possible when the stars align and logistics actually make sense. Let's say you live and game in some of the most expensive parts of the city Weho and Santa Monica you met a hot 21 year old blonde or Asian or whatever ethnicity you prefer. Vibe is good, you shared a few drinks and got through the bitch shield and then madeout.

Lights come on in the club and you invite her to your place whether a hotel or apartment just 4 blocks away, should be solid right? Well, she lives in Orange County and rode to the club with her 3 hot girlfriends. One of the girls is complaining that she is hungry, one of the girls just got an invite on social media to a party in the Hollywood hills tonight by some reality tv star, and the sober DD is a complete bitch and pulling the girl you just made out with into the car.

But you number closed her right? So you can just roll down to OC next weekend and close down there, no? Well in the time between when you last saw her she now has an additional 180 Tinder matches and ended up banging one, a college frat brother at UC Irvine or an aspiring model/rapper/actor on Wednesday night. Welcome to LA nightlife!

This is no exaggeration.

The women all drive together in the same damn car, so they can't split up...and in some cases, they drove up from an hour away.

In cities like NYC and Chicago, girls (in theory) should have little issue splitting up, since the subways (or L, as they call it, in Chicago) go EVERYWHERE and run 24/7. I can't say for sure, though, as I did day/street game exclusively until I moved to LA. Plus, you can easily approach close to 10 girls/day in NYC and Chicago since the foot traffic is endless. There's virtually zero foot traffic in "The City of Angels," especially in the SFV.

Literally approximately 5% of my numbers translate to dates. And I never end up seeing the girl again, even though one of them keeps texting me every two weeks or so, lol.

The logistics are absolutely atrocious due to the extreme sprawl, traffic, and flake mentality.

Makes it virtually impossible to do day/street game (since everyone drives) and makes the girls very flaky since they live so damn far away the majority of the time. Also, the venues are typically dead outside of Friday and Saturday nights in Los Angeles. It's unreal to me that guys in the PUA community always recommend moving to LA. LA has to be one of the worst (if not the worst) cities for pimping.

Los Angeles sounds like a stellar place on paper. 2nd largest American city. Alleged entertainment capital of the world. Models. Actresses. Pornstars! You name it. Problem is these women represent a miniscule percentage of the population and they typically go out with male models, celebrities, and multi-millionaires.

[C-Note]

(10-30-2016 10:50 PM)laq8ty Wrote:  

I agree with a lot of what is posted. But I think La is a city where you have to figure out a game/scene/niche that works for you and roll with it.

I have a story that kind of proves this point. I was in LA a few years ago and visited with a Guatemalan lady friend who I've known for years. She was telling me about her kids and that her deaf daughter, in her low 20s, was running on the wild side and that she didn't see her very often. I asked, "Is she bouncing around in Huntington Park?" (That's where they used to live). She answered, "No, she's a lesbian, so she hangs with the deaf lesbian crowd and they're primarily based in Riverside and Orange County."

I had no idea that there was a deaf lesbian community. But, it shows that in the LA area there is every kind of group that you can think of. So, I agree that you should find the group that has the lifestyle that interests you, then show off your charisma and alpha cred so that you become a leader in that group. Then, leverage that fame into other social groups that are related.

By the way, there are tons of information in this forum about how to game in LA. Check out some of the older stuff by Christian McQueen and G-Manifesto. Another regular who I haven't seen around lately who had a lot of good information was Drazen. He really seemed to know what he was talking about.

[dallasguy]

There's also tons of wannabe models and actresses that can be banged. Not my type of place tho since most of the people seem shallow, fake, and materialistic.

[LastKing]

Everything is far apart, too many other things to do besides fucking, lots of rich well connected guys inviting girls out to do cool trendy things. Also the type of girl that LA attracts is inherently flaky, IMO

[BossOfBosses]

Quote:

lots of rich well connected guys inviting girls out to do cool trendy things

Like what? I'm curious about this. It can't be worse than SF with all the tech money flowing around.

[Naughty By Nature]

(01-28-2017 07:26 PM)LastKing Wrote:  

Everything is far apart, too many other things to do besides fucking, lots of rich well connected guys inviting girls out to do cool trendy things. Also the type of girl that LA attracts is inherently flaky, IMO

Also, I swear to God. These Armenian and Persian women are racist. They NEVER date outside their ethnicity. You see it with a lot of Latinas out here but not all. I've noticed the same phenomenon with Dominican women in NYC.

[Naughty By Nature]

UPDATE: yeah, don't move to LA.

The level of entitlement on the women out here is disturbingly high. Not sure how dudes deal with this on a regular basis. They must have God-level game. I'd be curious to know how they put up with these antics. I've lived all over America and have not seen this stuff elsewhere.

In NYC and Chicago, when a girl was down for a day 2, I'd invite her out to the park, and nearly every time she'd oblige. Here in LA, they scoff at the idea of going to the park. It gets worse. I was on a day 2 last week at Starbuck's in the Beverly Center (terrible mall btw. Go to The Grove/Third Street Promenade/Glendale Americana instead) and the woman went, "I'm not doing this. Let's go to the bar (there's a bar on the 1st floor of shops)." She just left, lol, and I actually agreed in the moment since the Starbuck's line was so damn long. Then I realized this was a classic bait and switch and I told her A) I don't drink alcohol, and B) I'm not paying for her drink, since I agreed on going to a coffee shop, not a bar. I ended up leaving shortly thereafter, lol. Here's a text convo I had tonight (I thanked her for coming this way initially b/c it like a 50 minute drive):





Just warning guys about moving out here. Don't make the same error in judgment I made, lol.

[Balkan]

(02-10-2017 09:51 PM)Naughty By Nature Wrote:  

UPDATE: yeah, don't move to LA.

The level of entitlement on the women out here is disturbingly high. Not sure how dudes deal with this on a regular basis. They must have God-level game. I'd be curious to know how they put up with these antics. I've lived all over America and have not seen this stuff elsewhere.

In NYC and Chicago, when a girl was down for a day 2, I'd invite her out to the park, and nearly every time she'd oblige. Here in LA, they scoff at the idea of going to the park. It gets worse. I was on a day 2 last week at Starbuck's in the Beverly Center (terrible mall btw. Go to The Grove/Third Street Promenade/Glendale Americana instead) and the woman went, "I'm not doing this. Let's go to the bar (there's a bar on the 1st floor of shops)." She just left, lol, and I actually agreed in the moment since the Starbuck's line was so damn long. Then I realized this was a classic bait and switch and I told her A) I don't drink alcohol, and B) I'm not paying for her drink, since I agreed on going to a coffee shop, not a bar. I ended up leaving shortly thereafter, lol. Here's a text convo I had tonight (I thanked her for coming this way initially b/c it like a 50 minute drive):





Just warning guys about moving out here. Don't make the same error in judgment I made, lol.

Haha I have a Joanna in Pasadena's number too. Is she filipina?

I don't have the sharpest text game but generally speaking, especially if you got this number online, I'd structure texting so you don't have to ask back to back logistical questions. You could navigate this by asking her if she's a local pre-number close to probe her logistics or give her a quick phone once you number close and flesh out these details, which is what I usually do (although half are literally incapable or are super awkward over the phone).

"Can you make it to abc?" is rather supplicating. Better to assume and have her reneg than start on that foot.

"BTW thanks for coming out this way. That's really nice of you " Similar supplicating/ very strong pull as above. If you got this number in person and you genuinely are a confident nice guy, then this is fine but not so much online.

This brings up the greater issue of getting girls numbers that are a 30+min drive. These rarely end up in dates. So many logistical issues give them scapegoats to flake. It also usually isn't worth it to drive out to her home court when you don't have a spot to pull to. I only go on these dates when I'm okay with playing the long game as it's tough to get laid on the first date.

I know there are ample opportunities to use "lol" but I'd curtail it a bit. No guy should be saying "lol" in back to back to back texts.

This is how I would respond although I'm sure there are better responses...

Joanna: What or where should I meet you?
Balkan: Let's meet at Highland Park bowl at 8. There's a cool art gallery next door I think you'd like. Does wednesday or thursday work better?
Joanna: Um.. I think thursday
Balkan: thursday it is. better polish up your bowling game

[Naughty By Nature]

(02-10-2017 10:37 PM)Balkan Wrote:  

(02-10-2017 09:51 PM)Naughty By Nature Wrote:  

UPDATE: yeah, don't move to LA.

The level of entitlement on the women out here is disturbingly high. Not sure how dudes deal with this on a regular basis. They must have God-level game. I'd be curious to know how they put up with these antics. I've lived all over America and have not seen this stuff elsewhere.

In NYC and Chicago, when a girl was down for a day 2, I'd invite her out to the park, and nearly every time she'd oblige. Here in LA, they scoff at the idea of going to the park. It gets worse. I was on a day 2 last week at Starbuck's in the Beverly Center (terrible mall btw. Go to The Grove/Third Street Promenade/Glendale Americana instead) and the woman went, "I'm not doing this. Let's go to the bar (there's a bar on the 1st floor of shops)." She just left, lol, and I actually agreed in the moment since the Starbuck's line was so damn long. Then I realized this was a classic bait and switch and I told her A) I don't drink alcohol, and B) I'm not paying for her drink, since I agreed on going to a coffee shop, not a bar. I ended up leaving shortly thereafter, lol. Here's a text convo I had tonight (I thanked her for coming this way initially b/c it like a 50 minute drive):





Just warning guys about moving out here. Don't make the same error in judgment I made, lol.

Haha I have a Joanna in Pasadena's number too. Is she filipina?

I don't have the sharpest text game but generally speaking, especially if you got this number online, I'd structure texting so you don't have to ask back to back logistical questions. You could navigate this by asking her if she's a local pre-number close to probe her logistics or give her a quick phone once you number close and flesh out these details, which is what I usually do (although half are literally incapable or are super awkward over the phone).

"Can you make it to abc?" is rather supplicating. Better to assume and have her reneg than start on that foot.

"BTW thanks for coming out this way. That's really nice of you " Similar supplicating/ very strong pull as above. If you got this number in person and you genuinely are a confident nice guy, then this is fine but not so much online.

This brings up the greater issue of getting girls numbers that are a 30+min drive. These rarely end up in dates. So many logistical issues give them scapegoats to flake. It also usually isn't worth it to drive out to her home court when you don't have a spot to pull to. I only go on these dates when I'm okay with playing the long game as it's tough to get laid on the first date.

I know there are ample opportunities to use "lol" but I'd curtail it a bit. No guy should be saying "lol" in back to back to back texts.

This is how I would respond although I'm sure there are better responses...

Joanna: What or where should I meet you?
Balkan: Let's meet at Highland Park bowl at 8. There's a cool art gallery next door I think you'd like. Does wednesday or thursday work better?
Joanna: Um.. I think thursday
Balkan: thursday it is. better polish up your bowling game

Thanks bro.

She's Latina. El Salvadorian, I think. Maybe Mexican.

Good, I got her # from day game. We met initally at the Westfield Fashion Square. The only reason why I threw out that "that's really nice of you" line is b/c the woman was willing to drive roughly 50 mins. so I was genuinely grateful, lol.

Interesting regarding the "lol" thing.

She later was willing to meet up at a bar for drinks but I declined. I don't drink alcohol and I'm not looking for a girl to use me to buy her $20 worth of alcohol.

[Armogan]

Her interest level was low and that was terrible text game.

You asked her for a coffee date at 8pm? At a mall? That's just awful, she's not going to get excited meeting some random guy at a mall for coffee at 8pm. No one does, think from her perspective.

A bar or even better a restaurant that has bar seating is much better. The restaurant is better because you can frame it as dinner, but really you just get drinks at the bar with a couple snacks. "Meet me at xyz restaurant at 9pm. Best appetizers in town."

You don't drink? Ok, I can respect that. But can't you fake it a little? Go earlier and order soda water, she won't ask to drink it. Drinking most the time is more to loosen her up, not you.

If you're doing an activity that involves a bar, preferably with walking distance from your place, which I think is key for LA. "Come stop by, I live a block away." Is an easy sell if she drove far. If you're not drinking, don't book a coffee date at night. And 1.5 hours in advance, seems a little urgent.

This was low interest, and a weak pitch. Definitely don't thank her for driving 50 minutes, just no. Move on. Text less, as little as possible, just enough to get her out and do everything else in person.

[jselysianeagle]

(02-11-2017 06:50 AM)Armogan Wrote:  

Text less, as little as possible, just enough to get her out and do everything else in person.

This is great advice that I try and stick to myself as much as I can.

But OP - I mentioned it elsewhere (maybe in this same thread, I can't remember, lol), but LA is tough. Do your time there, make the most of it, but get out before you lose too many valuable years. I know I did, lol.

[Naughty By Nature]

(02-11-2017 06:50 AM)Armogan Wrote:  

Her interest level was low and that was terrible text game.

You asked her for a coffee date at 8pm? At a mall? That's just awful, she's not going to get excited meeting some random guy at a mall for coffee at 8pm. No one does, think from her perspective.

A bar or even better a restaurant that has bar seating is much better. The restaurant is better because you can frame it as dinner, but really you just get drinks at the bar with a couple snacks. "Meet me at xyz restaurant at 9pm. Best appetizers in town."

You don't drink? Ok, I can respect that. But can't you fake it a little? Go earlier and order soda water, she won't ask to drink it. Drinking most the time is more to loosen her up, not you.

If you're doing an activity that involves a bar, preferably with walking distance from your place, which I think is key for LA. "Come stop by, I live a block away." Is an easy sell if she drove far. If you're not drinking, don't book a coffee date at night. And 1.5 hours in advance, seems a little urgent.

This was low interest, and a weak pitch. Definitely don't thank her for driving 50 minutes, just no. Move on. Text less, as little as possible, just enough to get her out and do everything else in person.

Haha, thanks for the tough love?

Yeah, coffee/tea/snacks, whatever.

No, it was at a store called the Coffee Bean. I was telling the other guy that I approached her initially at the mall, b/c he wasn't sure if I met her online or something.

That isn't true at all. I've met girls for tea/coffee/smoothie/FroYo at 8 PM before. Heck, when I was in Chicago, I met girls several times at the park during the night for our first meet-up.

I mean I could but I've always avoided bar/lunch/dinner dates since I don't drink alcohol and I've found them to be a waste of money.

I do appreciate your text advice.

(02-11-2017 11:39 AM)jselysianeagle Wrote:  

(02-11-2017 06:50 AM)Armogan Wrote:  

Text less, as little as possible, just enough to get her out and do everything else in person.

This is great advice that I try and stick to myself as much as I can.

But OP - I mentioned it elsewhere (maybe in this same thread, I can't remember, lol), but LA is tough. Do your time there, make the most of it, but get out before you lose too many valuable years. I know I did, lol.

Thanks bro. I'm out of this city within the next 6 months, haha. There's no telling how much damage I'm going to do in Chicago/NYC/Minneapolis/Atlanta/Charlotte/Dallas/Houston.

[laq8ty]

Guys- I've basically just given up on LA. I agree with everything that has been posted here. Dates are fucking expensive. Its $25-30 minimum for 1 drink a piece at a decent bar and then some of these girls just literally ghost on you. Girls ghost on you here for no reason. Have no courtesy. Are rude. And don't answer texts for days. Many date well connected rich dudes and/or old guys who pay for everything. You can't find a quality girl here. Almost no girl is even worth an LTR here.

Its hard to make friends here too. Very very insular. It super frustrating. If you are from another city or state and move here- get ready to spend a lot of time by yourself or in your car driving. I would move in a heartbeat but my job forces me to be here. The distances and traffic make even acquaintances flake on the regular. I am convinced that the dredges of every city come out here.

We should start a thread for all the roosh v dudes who live in LA. I think it would be worthwhile to grab a drink. It seems that we all share the same frustrations here.

I totally understand the need/desire to do first dates at coffee shops. With the flake rate after first dates here being so high- even if you line up a ton of dates you will go broke spending $30 each time you grab a drink with a chick.

[BrewDog]

I lived in San Diego in my 20's. I found L.A. to be poosy paradise.

But yet I lived in San Diego and there's so many Navy SEALs, Marines, and Border Patrol agents that there's dudes all over that town with their shit together. When we would drive up to LA it was heaven compared to the snootiness of San Diego.

I dunno. I got laid a lot in San Diego, but I got laid A LOT in Los Angeles. But I was 23 and super fit. They might not even talk to me now.

[Travesty]

LOL that was probably at the height of the movie Top Gun, pre-smart phone and you were probably running around drunk telling people you were an ace fighter pilot.

[Agastya]

Guys, I'd recommend getting a place in Westwood or some area near a large college. Tons of cute young girls running around, daygame is easy, the party scene at UCLA sucks but a place like USC or Cal State LA might be better. Tinder is money out here too. Spitting game at the supermodels running around downtown sounds hard as fuck and trying to bang the girls who live hours away in Pasadena sounds even worse.

I could compare it to spitting game at girls from Cupertino/San Jose while living in San Francisco; they'd have to drive an hour, navigate an extremely strangely planned city(applies to both SF and LA, though LA is an order of magnitude worse)...just to meet a guy they may not like. Obviously the vast majority are going to flake. Women are going to flake wherever you are, when you have an LA-esque situation they're going to flake in droves.

[Naughty By Nature]

(02-13-2017 01:02 AM)laq8ty Wrote:  

Guys- I've basically just given up on LA. I agree with everything that has been posted here. Dates are fucking expensive. Its $25-30 minimum for 1 drink a piece at a decent bar and then some of these girls just literally ghost on you. Girls ghost on you here for no reason. Have no courtesy. Are rude. And don't answer texts for days. Many date well connected rich dudes and/or old guys who pay for everything. You can't find a quality girl here. Almost no girl is even worth an LTR here.

Its hard to make friends here too. Very very insular. It super frustrating. If you are from another city or state and move here- get ready to spend a lot of time by yourself or in your car driving. I would move in a heartbeat but my job forces me to be here. The distances and traffic make even acquaintances flake on the regular. I am convinced that the dredges of every city come out here.

We should start a thread for all the roosh v dudes who live in LA. I think it would be worthwhile to grab a drink. It seems that we all share the same frustrations here.

I totally understand the need/desire to do first dates at coffee shops. With the flake rate after first dates here being so high- even if you line up a ton of dates you will go broke spending $30 each time you grab a drink with a chick.

Yeah, wtf?!

It's hard enough to get a # to translate to a date out here to begin with...then you factor in that if you do land a date, you're almost certainly not going to get a second date, which becomes extremely frustrating.

When I was taking the train from Connecticut into NYC, I was almost always getting 2nd, 3rd, even sometimes 4th dates with the girls I was going out with, and I wasn't even spending a penny on them.

The disparity between the flakage/entitlement between LA and EVERY other American city is utterly astounding.

[RDF]

(02-11-2017 04:17 PM)Naughty By Nature Wrote:  

(02-11-2017 06:50 AM)Armogan Wrote:  

Her interest level was low and that was terrible text game.

You asked her for a coffee date at 8pm? At a mall? That's just awful, she's not going to get excited meeting some random guy at a mall for coffee at 8pm. No one does, think from her perspective.

A bar or even better a restaurant that has bar seating is much better. The restaurant is better because you can frame it as dinner, but really you just get drinks at the bar with a couple snacks. "Meet me at xyz restaurant at 9pm. Best appetizers in town."

You don't drink? Ok, I can respect that. But can't you fake it a little? Go earlier and order soda water, she won't ask to drink it. Drinking most the time is more to loosen her up, not you.

If you're doing an activity that involves a bar, preferably with walking distance from your place, which I think is key for LA. "Come stop by, I live a block away." Is an easy sell if she drove far. If you're not drinking, don't book a coffee date at night. And 1.5 hours in advance, seems a little urgent.

This was low interest, and a weak pitch. Definitely don't thank her for driving 50 minutes, just no. Move on. Text less, as little as possible, just enough to get her out and do everything else in person.

Haha, thanks for the tough love?

Yeah, coffee/tea/snacks, whatever.

No, it was at a store called the Coffee Bean. I was telling the other guy that I approached her initially at the mall, b/c he wasn't sure if I met her online or something.

That isn't true at all. I've met girls for tea/coffee/smoothie/FroYo at 8 PM before. Heck, when I was in Chicago, I met girls several times at the park during the night for our first meet-up.

I mean I could but I've always avoided bar/lunch/dinner dates since I don't drink alcohol and I've found them to be a waste of money.

I do appreciate your text advice.

I'm from LA also and I've read your posts on this thread. I'll readily admit that it can be a tough city to pull, but this you described interaction helped me place your situation into perspective. I agree with most of what Armogan said, and I'll try to give you some advice to make the remainder of your time in LA more positive.

From what I can tell you're in your early/mid20s, so I'm guessing you're going for girls your age or younger. Let's say 20-25. That's pretty much what I go for. From my experience, even reasonably attractive girls that age in LA are generally not interested in going on a coffee shop date with some guy for a first or second date unless they're extremely attracted from the get-go or they think you're offering them something unique. Plus, how is it an advantage for you? The one time I went to a coffee shop on a first date, it was the most asexual experience I've ever had. It sounds from your posts like you're interested in fucking more girls, or maybe having a few mini-relationships, not finding a wife. Maybe in other cities you were getting girls out to coffee at night, but were you fucking them afterwards? I'd be extremely surprised, but I'm yet to meet a single guy in LA who can fuck girls regularly after first dates at coffee shops.

I strongly recommend doing your first dates at bars or some type of establishment that serves alcohol. I saw you don't drink, which I respect, but just drink a soda/lime or something else. 90% of girls won't give a fuck if you're comfortable with your decision and don't sound insecure about it. Yeah, you'll probably have to pay for her drink. One drink at a casual bar is less than $10 unless you're going ultra high end (completely unnecessary). If you're ordering soda water for yourself it'll be free with the drink. Including tip you'll spend ~$15 on one round. If you go to the right type of venue (couches, dim lighting, etc) in the evening, one round should give you enough time to tell if the girl is down to go home that night... girls drink slow and if it's a big strong drink she can take ~40 mins to finish it. If you don't have chemistry or you can tell it's not gonna happen (she's got work next morning, etc), go for the kiss or call the date over. If you think she's down, go for the kiss and pull, or if you think she's down but needs more time, then go for the second round for another $10-15 to buy more time. (On that note, if $15-30 is a lot to spend for a reasonable shot of getting laid with an attractive girl, you're better off focusing on making more money rather than even going on dates or going out daygaming, but that's your choice). I don't know where people come up with the idea that you need to spend $50-100 on a date with a chick. That might be the case when you're going for the highest quality who fuck with Lakers starters, but a regular cute college or post-grad girl, even in LA, doesn't have those expectations. She wants to do something fun, and sitting a coffee shop with a guy she's only moderately interested in doesn't sit high on that list.

Women have a lot of options nowadays, and I'll admit that it is probably magnified in a city like LA, where the "next best thing" is always available. I've never dated in Chicago so I can't judge whether it really is possible to pull a girl after a first-night meetup at the park there. However, for the moment you're in LA, so you should try out something new and see how it works out.

A quick word of encouragement. You mention girls driving to see you, up to 1 hour long drives. This is obviously common in LA, so remember this next time you get a girl to drive this far to you on a date: If a girl is driving that long to see you, she is considering hooking up with you that night. Period. Even if she knows you're going to buy her two rounds of drinks, who's going to travel that long just to use you for your $20? Next time you're on a date where you know the girl is traveling that long to see you, come into the date with as much confidence as possible. She's yours to lose.

[BrewDog]

(02-13-2017 01:12 AM)Travesty Wrote:  

LOL that was probably at the height of the movie Top Gun, pre-smart phone and you were probably running around drunk telling people you were an ace fighter pilot.

Well, I was certainly running around drunk.

[StackGsMan]

I spent most of my time in LA a few years back. Back then I had what is probably a top 5% body, but I had extreme approach anxiety (which I battled to overcome) and had little game.

Most recently I was in LA again after having approached hundreds and fucking many women over the years, growing as a man, seeing more of the world, and learning more game. This time around I weighed around 300 lbs.

Which version of me do you think got the most play?

If you live in LA I highly encourage you to develop a top level body and to up your SMV. I agree that there is a lot to complain about when it comes to women in LA, but if you plan to show up to the most superficial city in the U.S. (and maybe in the entire world) and complain about women being flakey, then I highly suggest you look in the mirror first.

The most successful player I've ever met (he's from LA), a guy that makes his living off women, told me to get a top notch body and the rest will follow.

[Naughty By Nature]

(02-13-2017 08:27 PM)RDF Wrote:  

(02-11-2017 04:17 PM)Naughty By Nature Wrote:  

(02-11-2017 06:50 AM)Armogan Wrote:  

Her interest level was low and that was terrible text game.

You asked her for a coffee date at 8pm? At a mall? That's just awful, she's not going to get excited meeting some random guy at a mall for coffee at 8pm. No one does, think from her perspective.

A bar or even better a restaurant that has bar seating is much better. The restaurant is better because you can frame it as dinner, but really you just get drinks at the bar with a couple snacks. "Meet me at xyz restaurant at 9pm. Best appetizers in town."

You don't drink? Ok, I can respect that. But can't you fake it a little? Go earlier and order soda water, she won't ask to drink it. Drinking most the time is more to loosen her up, not you.

If you're doing an activity that involves a bar, preferably with walking distance from your place, which I think is key for LA. "Come stop by, I live a block away." Is an easy sell if she drove far. If you're not drinking, don't book a coffee date at night. And 1.5 hours in advance, seems a little urgent.

This was low interest, and a weak pitch. Definitely don't thank her for driving 50 minutes, just no. Move on. Text less, as little as possible, just enough to get her out and do everything else in person.

Haha, thanks for the tough love?

Yeah, coffee/tea/snacks, whatever.

No, it was at a store called the Coffee Bean. I was telling the other guy that I approached her initially at the mall, b/c he wasn't sure if I met her online or something.

That isn't true at all. I've met girls for tea/coffee/smoothie/FroYo at 8 PM before. Heck, when I was in Chicago, I met girls several times at the park during the night for our first meet-up.

I mean I could but I've always avoided bar/lunch/dinner dates since I don't drink alcohol and I've found them to be a waste of money.

I do appreciate your text advice.

I'm from LA also and I've read your posts on this thread. I'll readily admit that it can be a tough city to pull, but this you described interaction helped me place your situation into perspective. I agree with most of what Armogan said, and I'll try to give you some advice to make the remainder of your time in LA more positive.

From what I can tell you're in your early/mid20s, so I'm guessing you're going for girls your age or younger. Let's say 20-25. That's pretty much what I go for. From my experience, even reasonably attractive girls that age in LA are generally not interested in going on a coffee shop date with some guy for a first or second date unless they're extremely attracted from the get-go or they think you're offering them something unique. Plus, how is it an advantage for you? The one time I went to a coffee shop on a first date, it was the most asexual experience I've ever had. It sounds from your posts like you're interested in fucking more girls, or maybe having a few mini-relationships, not finding a wife. Maybe in other cities you were getting girls out to coffee at night, but were you fucking them afterwards? I'd be extremely surprised, but I'm yet to meet a single guy in LA who can fuck girls regularly after first dates at coffee shops.

I strongly recommend doing your first dates at bars or some type of establishment that serves alcohol. I saw you don't drink, which I respect, but just drink a soda/lime or something else. 90% of girls won't give a fuck if you're comfortable with your decision and don't sound insecure about it. Yeah, you'll probably have to pay for her drink. One drink at a casual bar is less than $10 unless you're going ultra high end (completely unnecessary). If you're ordering soda water for yourself it'll be free with the drink. Including tip you'll spend ~$15 on one round. If you go to the right type of venue (couches, dim lighting, etc) in the evening, one round should give you enough time to tell if the girl is down to go home that night... girls drink slow and if it's a big strong drink she can take ~40 mins to finish it. If you don't have chemistry or you can tell it's not gonna happen (she's got work next morning, etc), go for the kiss or call the date over. If you think she's down, go for the kiss and pull, or if you think she's down but needs more time, then go for the second round for another $10-15 to buy more time. (On that note, if $15-30 is a lot to spend for a reasonable shot of getting laid with an attractive girl, you're better off focusing on making more money rather than even going on dates or going out daygaming, but that's your choice). I don't know where people come up with the idea that you need to spend $50-100 on a date with a chick. That might be the case when you're going for the highest quality who fuck with Lakers starters, but a regular cute college or post-grad girl, even in LA, doesn't have those expectations. She wants to do something fun, and sitting a coffee shop with a guy she's only moderately interested in doesn't sit high on that list.

Women have a lot of options nowadays, and I'll admit that it is probably magnified in a city like LA, where the "next best thing" is always available. I've never dated in Chicago so I can't judge whether it really is possible to pull a girl after a first-night meetup at the park there. However, for the moment you're in LA, so you should try out something new and see how it works out.

A quick word of encouragement. You mention girls driving to see you, up to 1 hour long drives. This is obviously common in LA, so remember this next time you get a girl to drive this far to you on a date: If a girl is driving that long to see you, she is considering hooking up with you that night. Period. Even if she knows you're going to buy her two rounds of drinks, who's going to travel that long just to use you for your $20? Next time you're on a date where you know the girl is traveling that long to see you, come into the date with as much confidence as possible. She's yours to lose.

Bro, thanks a bunch for this advice! This really helps.

Yup, I'm in my mid-20s.

Good point. It is quite asexual, lol. My go-to day 2 in NYC/Chicago was going to the park. Costs $0.00, it's beautiful, and you can escalate. Unfortunately, I've only had 1 girl down to go to the park for a day 2 since moving to LA. I figured the next cheapest thing was going to a coffee shop/FroYo joint. I'm really tight on cash.

Interesting. I've heard from a few girls that they wouldn't be comfortable drinking alcohol alongside a guy who isn't drink alcohol. Maybe they were more the exception than the rule.

What about sticking with a park date (if possible) or coffee shop date then serving her alcohol when I pull her back to my place? That way, it'll be far cheaper. I could buy a cheap bottle of vodka and cranberry juice. I would serve her the cocktail and just serve myself cranberry juice.

Believe you, me, it's true.

Over my last 7 weeks in college in Evanston, IL (right outside Chicago), I pulled 7 times. Every single date was a 1st date at the park. $0.00 spent.

Keep in mind, I only had sex with 1 of those girls, lol. I pulled 4 or 5 other girls back to my apartment over the rest of my last 2 years in college. I met all of those girls, too, at the park for my 1st date.

Also, I pulled the 1 girl who was down for the park in LA back to my place. We just made out. No lay. She said she'd come back again and she's texted me a few times since then, but alas, she's had cold feet.

Pulls are a gimme if you set up the date near your apartment, even if you spend nothing. I just say, "Let's go for a walk," and dunzo, I lead her through my door. The girl's in my joint. Doesn't mean a whole lot if you don't get the lay and that's been my main sticking point: end game.

I always wondered why my lay/pull rate was so low. It's clear that alcohol is a must. I always wondered, too, how fellow dudes who don't drink alcohol consistently convert their pulls to lays (assuming they're telling the truth). I guess you just have to be comfortable serving the girl alcohol while you drink seltzer.

[Merenguero]

(02-11-2017 01:38 AM)Naughty By Nature Wrote:  

(02-10-2017 10:37 PM)Balkan Wrote:  

(02-10-2017 09:51 PM)Naughty By Nature Wrote:  

UPDATE: yeah, don't move to LA.

The level of entitlement on the women out here is disturbingly high. Not sure how dudes deal with this on a regular basis. They must have God-level game. I'd be curious to know how they put up with these antics. I've lived all over America and have not seen this stuff elsewhere.

In NYC and Chicago, when a girl was down for a day 2, I'd invite her out to the park, and nearly every time she'd oblige. Here in LA, they scoff at the idea of going to the park. It gets worse. I was on a day 2 last week at Starbuck's in the Beverly Center (terrible mall btw. Go to The Grove/Third Street Promenade/Glendale Americana instead) and the woman went, "I'm not doing this. Let's go to the bar (there's a bar on the 1st floor of shops)." She just left, lol, and I actually agreed in the moment since the Starbuck's line was so damn long. Then I realized this was a classic bait and switch and I told her A) I don't drink alcohol, and B) I'm not paying for her drink, since I agreed on going to a coffee shop, not a bar. I ended up leaving shortly thereafter, lol. Here's a text convo I had tonight (I thanked her for coming this way initially b/c it like a 50 minute drive):





Just warning guys about moving out here. Don't make the same error in judgment I made, lol.

Haha I have a Joanna in Pasadena's number too. Is she filipina?

I don't have the sharpest text game but generally speaking, especially if you got this number online, I'd structure texting so you don't have to ask back to back logistical questions. You could navigate this by asking her if she's a local pre-number close to probe her logistics or give her a quick phone once you number close and flesh out these details, which is what I usually do (although half are literally incapable or are super awkward over the phone).

"Can you make it to abc?" is rather supplicating. Better to assume and have her reneg than start on that foot.

"BTW thanks for coming out this way. That's really nice of you " Similar supplicating/ very strong pull as above. If you got this number in person and you genuinely are a confident nice guy, then this is fine but not so much online.

This brings up the greater issue of getting girls numbers that are a 30+min drive. These rarely end up in dates. So many logistical issues give them scapegoats to flake. It also usually isn't worth it to drive out to her home court when you don't have a spot to pull to. I only go on these dates when I'm okay with playing the long game as it's tough to get laid on the first date.

I know there are ample opportunities to use "lol" but I'd curtail it a bit. No guy should be saying "lol" in back to back to back texts.

This is how I would respond although I'm sure there are better responses...

Joanna: What or where should I meet you?
Balkan: Let's meet at Highland Park bowl at 8. There's a cool art gallery next door I think you'd like. Does wednesday or thursday work better?
Joanna: Um.. I think thursday
Balkan: thursday it is. better polish up your bowling game

Thanks bro.

She's Latina. El Salvadorian, I think. Maybe Mexican.

Good, I got her # from day game. We met initally at the Westfield Fashion Square. The only reason why I threw out that "that's really nice of you" line is b/c the woman was willing to drive roughly 50 mins. so I was genuinely grateful, lol.

Interesting regarding the "lol" thing.

She later was willing to meet up at a bar for drinks but I declined. I don't drink alcohol and I'm not looking for a girl to use me to buy her $20 worth of alcohol.

I don't understand how this amounts to flakiness. You told her in advance you weren't paying for her drinks, which would have in and of itself scared most girls off, then you wanted to meet for coffee, when it's obvious she was interested in something else.

[poutsara]

The biggest cock-blocker in LA is the 10. Or maybe the 405. Or the 110. In fact, LA is full of asphalt cock-blockers. The solution is to live where you don't have to drive so far to be where you want to be.

The typical LA girl who has moved to LA from elsewhere simply to be in LA is a high flake risk. The girls that grew up here, less so, but still flaky. Just expect it.

Nightlife is generally weak. The best weekends in LA I have ever experienced were actually spent in Vegas. That should say something.

For dates, you may want to think outside the box of drinks at a bar, but I would not do coffee or tea at 8 pm, and LA has lots of options.

This all doesn't mean you can't win in LA, just that you need to step up your game first and plan logistics more carefully than anywhere.

Day game is ok. Ap game is not bad. There are a lot of girls on them. It's a swipe-fest, but you can line them up with little effort. When summer comes, try the pool parties. Another reason to stay in shape.

There are a lot of ethnic cliques in LA (Armenian, Persian, Latin, to name a few). Find those who have girls that like you and capitalize.

[Drazen]

People in LA are flakey because it really doesn't attract stable professionals like you'd see in other cities. The types of jobs out here are crazy because the people out here are crazy and have money to throw around. That being said, most people here are really lazy or just want to stay around where they live (unless they live in shitty parts of town or Butt-Fuck Egypt (the Valley, OC, Inland Empire)). If you live near the Westside, you won't go past the 405. If you live in Hollywood, you won't go past La Cieniega or east of Vermont.

I have a 5 mile dating radius, any girl that lives past that you'll see once a week if you're lucky. (I live on the westside, and my actual enforceable rule is I'll date someone west of La Cieniega). Nowadays, people quantify dating potential on how much an uber will cost to go see them. After fighting through traffic after work, the last thing you'd want to do is fight through more traffic to go to the other side of town. Its honestly not worth the effort. Live where you want to date, that's basically your only option.

If you ever want to glimpse into the mind on an Angelo, read this: https://www.instagram.com/overheardla/

Its spot on.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BQWx8f6lZvi/...verheardla

[Merenguero]

(02-14-2017 05:14 PM)Drazen Wrote:  

People in LA are flakey because it really doesn't attract stable professionals like you'd see in other cities. The types of jobs out here are crazy because the people out here are crazy and have money to throw around. That being said, most people here are really lazy or just want to stay around where they live (unless they live in shitty parts of town or Butt-Fuck Egypt (the Valley, OC, Inland Empire)). If you live near the Westside, you won't go past the 405. If you live in Hollywood, you won't go past La Cieniega or east of Vermont.

I have a 5 mile dating radius, any girl that lives past that you'll see once a week if you're lucky. (I live on the westside, and my actual enforceable rule is I'll date someone west of La Cieniega). Nowadays, people quantify dating potential on how much an uber will cost to go see them. After fighting through traffic after work, the last thing you'd want to do is fight through more traffic to go to the other side of town. Its honestly not worth the effort. Live where you want to date, that's basically your only option.

If you ever want to glimpse into the mind on an Angelo, read this: https://www.instagram.com/overheardla/

Its spot on.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BQWx8f6lZvi/...verheardla

Am I really missing something, or is the simple solution just to live in a beach town, if you can afford it, only go out in that town (or the immediate surrounding area), and mostly only target girls from that town? That's what I did and logistics were never an issue. I never once thought about living in or going out in an inland part of Southern California.