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Girl goes cold after number request on POF, what to do?
#1

Girl goes cold after number request on POF, what to do?

So yesterday I was messaged out of the blue by a girl on POF. She's 27, Black, big boobs, 5'2, well traveled. We banter back and forth about travel, music, etc. She asks me where I am from and I tell her then I ask about her background. We exchange about 10 messages each over a span of two hours and then finally ask "you seem pretty cool and I would like to get to know you more. What is your number?" then nothing after that. She messaged me rapidly before that so she was obviously somewhat interested.

I was careful not to use game over POF and to get the number on the same day to set up a date. But this does not seem to work for me. When I spread things out over a two day period then go for the number I seem to do better getting the digits. A lot of people recommend getting them after only a few messages but have been ghosted the last few times I did it. Can anybody tell me what I did wrong? Your help is appreciated.
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#2

Girl goes cold after number request on POF, what to do?

You did nothing wrong. Many girls like the attention but freeze up when they need to decide if they want to go further. Just assume most girls online only want attention and will never meet up and you will be fine.
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#3

Girl goes cold after number request on POF, what to do?

Quote: (09-12-2016 06:29 AM)MdWanderer Wrote:  

Can anybody tell me what I did wrong? Your help is appreciated.

Absolutely nothing. Online girls have the attention span of a goldfish. It's completely common for a girl to seem really interested for a few minutes, even ones who message me first, and then flake on the meet or otherwise vanish without a trace.

It's happened to me dozens and dozens of times over the past year. It sucks to feel like you had a hot lead and then she's gone but...unless you did something absolutely stupid, you can't over-analyze it.

I remember reading a while back some online hamster waxing philosophical about her app experience. "Oh, you feel like a rock star! You say, 'hey this guy is pretty cool' but then you say 'oh look at this guy over here!' and you run around like a kid in a candy store." She was barely a 6.

You get the picture. Charge it 2 da game. Girls cold-opening you is a good sign - another will come along who is serious about getting the D. The end of the summer is historically a good time for me, girls are ending their summer flings and looking for something new, so I'd suggest continuing to hammer away at it for at least the rest of the month.
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#4

Girl goes cold after number request on POF, what to do?

She only wanted some male attention, without any intention to meet.
Lots of girls online are like that.
Better luck with the next one.
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#5

Girl goes cold after number request on POF, what to do?

Quote: (09-12-2016 09:57 AM)XPQ22 Wrote:  

Quote: (09-12-2016 06:29 AM)MdWanderer Wrote:  

Can anybody tell me what I did wrong? Your help is appreciated.
Absolutely nothing. Online girls have the attention span of a turnip.

Did you just make that up?


In regards to the OP,

Lots of women nowadays use dating apps not to meet men, but simply to kill time or seek some validation when they're bored. In addition to the stimuli that they're faced with everyday (hundreds of men messaging them), and their lack of attention span, women have the ability to be capricious online.

I go for the number pretty quickly, so that I can sort out the girls that actually want to meet vs those that don't. I don't want to overanalyze your online game, but I wouldn't say "I want to get to know you more", that seems a bit cheesy to me, unless you want to become her gay best friend.

Just my two cents.

Move on to the next one.
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#6

Girl goes cold after number request on POF, what to do?

Quote: (09-12-2016 10:05 AM)WeekendCasanova Wrote:  

Did you just make that up?

I changed that to "goldfish." Same deal.

Quote:Quote:

Lots of women nowadays use dating apps not to meet men, but simply to kill time or seek some validation when they're bored. In addition to the stimuli that they're faced with everyday (hundreds of men messaging them), and their lack of attention span, women have the ability to be capricious online.

One of the girls I was seeing this year had a roommate, a passable "7." She was on Tinder, Bumble, etc. swiping and BSing with dudes all day long.

She was already fucking a guy regularly and, as far as we could tell, never brought anyone home or even met with anyone. [Image: dodgy.gif]

Quote:Quote:

I go for the number pretty quickly, so that I can sort out the girls that actually want to meet vs those that don't. I don't want to overanalyze your online game, but I wouldn't say "I want to get to know you more", that seems a bit cheesy to me, unless you want to become her gay best friend.

Just my two cents.

Once or twice I've "long-gamed" a girl online, one whom I got in touch with, she disappeared, came back, disappeared, and then we finally met up and it worked out. But in 99% of cases, if the interaction stretches over more than a day and I can't get them to pay attention to me exclusively for just little bit, like we're having a real-time chat, it's a dead lead.
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#7

Girl goes cold after number request on POF, what to do?

Thanks guys, you all gave me the smack in the head that I needed, I have moved on.
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#8

Girl goes cold after number request on POF, what to do?

Quote: (09-12-2016 03:13 PM)MdWanderer Wrote:  

Thanks guys, you all gave me the smack in the head that I needed, I have moved on.

Good to hear you've moved on man. It won't be the first time it happens. It's a numbers game, especially online.
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#9

Girl goes cold after number request on POF, what to do?

Well, are you talking to other women online, because she is probably talking to dozens of other men online. Most women get hundreds of messages a day from men. So, 1) either she was bored and just looking for an online flirtation, 2) she has a real-life boyfriend/husband and goes online for fantasies and validation (like anthony weiner), 3) she is talking to other guys and thinks those guys are hotter. Maybe she doesn't see you as that hot, and doesn't want to meet in real-life, and prefers an online flirtation. (4) It could be a catfish and she could be a dude and (5) she could be a working girl looking for a sugar daddy.

You are probably right about rushing for a meeting, some girls need more time to get mentally ready for a meeting. Unless they are DTF for a ONS - then those girls want immediate meetups.

With online dating, some girls play the long-game and just want the online fantasies. Then maybe a few weeks later, they get the courage to meet in real-life. Hang-in there and she might come back to you, but move on to other girls in the mean-time. Play up the jealousy card and see if she comes crawling back to you. Or if she is looking for a sugar daddy, bribe her with an expensive dinner.

Also, you don't really need a phone number - just ask for a date and location meeting. Most people have mobile apps so you don't even need a phone number to text her.
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#10

Girl goes cold after number request on POF, what to do?

"Also, you don't really need a phone number - just ask for a date and location meeting. Most people have mobile apps so you don't even need a phone number to text her. "

Exactly. No need to go for the number before you've even suggested potential plans together. You need to do that first, otherwise they are likely to freeze up and reject you.

Also they're more likely to give you their number if you both actually have a reason for her to give it to you, like a date.

"Especially Roosh offers really good perspectives. But like MW said, at the end of the day, is he one of us?"

- Reciproke, posted on the Roosh V Forum.
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#11

Girl goes cold after number request on POF, what to do?

A lot of women (married/have boyfriend/fat/ugly/social issues) use online dating services as a social outlet, validation tool and to meet their emotional needs.

You can pick these by excessive talking/messaging, too many phone calls and an absolute reluctance to ever meet you.

Don't be used as an emotional tampon by these women.

Screen them out and bin them if they will not meet after a few messages, one phone call.

Don't forget, there are billions of women in the world, move on and find one that wants to actually meet you!
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