[Going strong]

A clueless, religious and harmless US dude, 24 years old, "meets" a square and at best plain-looking (and older) Venezuelan woman on the internet. She convinces him to come marry her in almost-in-a-state-of-civil-war, extremely unstable and violent Venezuela.



US dude is in love, hops on a plane, marries the fattie. He then comes back from his beach-resort honeymoon, gets arrested by the Venezuelan communist police "for being a spy" and having "grenades and assault rifles in his (the couple's) suburban apartment".

http://latino.foxnews.com/latino/news/20...jailed-in/

http://acn.com.ve/gringo-venia-casarse-n...uso-espia/
"Un joven estadounidense, identificado como Joshua Anthony Holt, fue detenido el pasado 30 de junio por funcionarios del SEBIN y trasladado a la sede del Helicoide, luego de haber sido acusado por las autoridades de ser un supuesto “espía de los Estados Unidos”. Al joven se le habría encontrado como evidencia una granada y unos rifles de asalto. Sin embargo, familiares y amigos de la víctima aseguran que la evidencia es “sembrada”. Holt, de tan solo 24 años, llegó a Venezuela con la intención de casarse con su prometida venezolana que conoció por internet, Thamara Belén Caleño Candelo. Estaba planificando regresar dentro de un mes con su esposa para vivir en los EEUU. Pese a las advertencias de sus familiares y amigos de no venir a Venezuela por ser un lugar “altamente peligroso”, Holt decidió que era el momento de iniciar una vida con la mujer que consideraba su alma gemela."

Translation:
A young American man, identified as Joshua Anthony Holt, was arrested on June 30 by officials of the SEBIN and transferred to the headquarter of Helicoide , after being accused by authorities of being an alleged " spy for the United States." This young man, in his apartment were found a grenade and some assault rifles . However, relatives and friends of the victim say the evidence is " fabricated" . Holt, only 24 , arrived in Venezuela with the intention to marry his fiancee, Venezuelan woman whom he met online, Thamara Bethlehem Caleño Candelo . He was planning to return in a month with his wife to live in the USA . Despite warnings from family and friends not to come to Venezuela to be a "highly dangerous " place , Holt decided it was time to start a life with the woman he considered his soulmate



I mean, if this later-day-saints young dude is James Bond on a mission to assassinate Maduro - by way of marrying fatties and throwing grenades, I'm Hugo Chavez!

[eatthishomie]

You'd have to be out of your fucking mind to go to Venezuela now, especially to marry a DC 5/10.

[Going strong]

(09-08-2016 05:00 PM)eatthishomie Wrote:  

You'd have to be out of your fucking mind to go to Venezuela now, especially to marry a DC 5/10.

She's not even a 5/10, she's a 2/10 and ten years older than him!



The thirst is so fuckin real!

The weapons allegedly found at his place, yeah sure, I bet the dude couldn't even kill a fly!


lol, the obvious set-up:
https://notisur24.com/2016/06/30/suceso-...-un-fusil/



(By the way, the armalite in the pic above is obviously a plastic toy, even though the AK47 is real)

[kaotic]

Don't bang Venezuela - with your dick or smuggled weapons.

[Jaydublin]

I don't know about you guys but I feel bad for this dude. Most westerners couldn't handle a Venezuelan jail, I am certain this man is not prepared to spend 10+ years in one.

[Going strong]

(09-08-2016 05:10 PM)Jaydublin Wrote:  

I don't know about you guys but I feel bad for this dude. Most westerners couldn't handle a Venezuelan jail, I am certain this man is not prepared to spend 10+ years in one.

Forget about 10+ years, the poor guy is already almost dying in jail after 2 months, and his loving US family is calling for his urgent release... Maduro of course shows no mercy...

"In a letter from Josh to his parents, sent Aug. 22, Josh wrote about how he was holding up physically.

"I have had one sickness after another – kidney stones, bronchitis and now have something that makes me itch like I have never itched before," he wrote. "I had times where I could barely breathe. The judge approved not one time, but twice for me to go to the hospital, however I have never left the jail."

Josh is scheduled to appear before a judge for a hearing on September 15, where he could be released on his own recognizance. Laurie and Jason are concerned that may be too late for their son."

[Chowder Head]

They have equal SMV. He is fat, balding, 24 yr old? He looks 35 - 40. And she is chubby with avg looks. He is just happy to get pussy on the regular. This relationship sure isn't worth getting put in a Venezuelan jail. I wonder what site he met her on. I would like to find one of those desperate to escape, Miss Universe type Venezuelan bitches. But I would have her swim to Trinidad , where its safe, and I'd pick her up there.

[Going strong]

(09-08-2016 05:21 PM)Chowder Head Wrote:  

They have equal SMV. He is fat, balding, 24 yr old? He looks 35 - 40. And she is chubby with avg looks. He is just happy to get pussy on the regular. This relationship sure isn't worth getting put in a Venezuelan jail.

I have to disagree (even though yes, he does look a bit older). A blonde, not obese, young dude like that: quite tall, not ugly, American passport bearer, well-educated, could have gotten HB 7s or even 8s easily in SEA or LatAm - if he had a bit of game. That is the saddest part of this story. Game save lives, in many ways...

[Handsome Creepy Eel]

Incredible that this dude is only 24. He looks 64!

[RIslander]

I would say their SMV is equal. What a dumbass though.

[getdownonit]

nasa test pilot is that you?

(09-08-2016 05:07 PM)Going strong Wrote:  

Looks like he was smuggling about US$3.50 in Bolivares there holy shit

[LINUX]

Give the guy a break. He's Mormon. They don't care about looks, they care about women who can have the most kids. He hit the jackpot in his mind.

[Bury Zenek]

The only thing he hit is jail.

[GlobalMan]

(09-08-2016 05:07 PM)Going strong Wrote:  

Are they trying to imply something sinister with these belongings? Thats about $650, passport, drivers license, Utah concealed firearm permit, and some credit cards. All things that a tourist would have in their wallet.

As far as the weapons, seems like bullshit. Though, I'd have the same in my home if I was living in Venezuela.

One of the shittiest and most unsafe places to be in the world right now- and it wasn't great back when it was "better".

[eatthishomie]

(09-08-2016 05:07 PM)Going strong Wrote:  

(09-08-2016 05:00 PM)eatthishomie Wrote:  

You'd have to be out of your fucking mind to go to Venezuela now, especially to marry a DC 5/10.

She's not even a 5/10, she's a 2/10 and ten years older than him!

Hence why I said DC 5/10... she would be the lower end of a nickel piece in this godforsaken city.

[philosophical_recovery]

Give them both 2 points on the SMV scale and this looks almost identical to someone I know and his latin wifelet.

[Gorgiass]

(09-08-2016 05:07 PM)Going strong Wrote:  

The weapons allegedly found at his place, yeah sure, I bet the dude couldn't even kill a fly!

The TSA is really slipping these days. Are those disposable film cameras? Not really helping their "spy" case with those, although I'm sure they're standard issue for all 3 Venezuelan men of mystery.

[Leonard D Neubache]

Sometimes I wish I had more money.

Then something like this comes along and I realise I'm just glad I have some brains in my head.

[Snowplow]

Captain save a hoe at its finest....

[eatthishomie]

And here's the possible root of the problem right here. Look at the way this dude's fucking mother poses with him in this picture. She almost looks as if she's treating him like a boyfriend. Her face is all close to his and her hand is nestled in his chest. If I didn't know any better I'd say she was his (older) girlfriend. It's one thing to be close to your mother (to a healthy degree), but this clearly shows that he is a mama's boy to an unhealthy extreme. That's where this dude's beta tendencies come from I bet you anything. At least Dad is in the picture at all, so there's that.

[Rocha]

Well real life spies are not like James Bond...It is easier to draw less attention has an harmless regular bloke than a super sophisticated, jacked and Armani suit wearing dude...There is a slight chance that indeed the guy can be a real bad ass hitman with a babyface, ...I try to not judge a mans balls by the way he looks.

Probably it is a fake acusation, but the guy had balls to go to a hostile country to bring back his loved ugly fattie... Fact of matter is that he his busted too, but many losers do not leave their couches.

But what brings me chills is seeing the pic with his loving mother close to him, and thinking how the poor lady must feel like now, knowing her boy is dying in some dirty venezuelan jail, among crazy criminal mofos...

[Enigma]

This should be a commercial for the red pill.

Rarely will you ever see the failures of Marxist culture and Marxist politics come together in such a perfect storm of hilarious absurdity.

[Jaydublin]

(09-08-2016 09:05 PM)eatthishomie Wrote:  



And here's the possible root of the problem right here. Look at the way this dude's fucking mother poses with him in this picture. She almost looks as if she's treating him like a boyfriend. Her face is all close to his and her hand is nestled in his chest. If I didn't know any better I'd say she was his (older) girlfriend. It's one thing to be close to your mother (to a healthy degree), but this clearly shows that he is a mama's boy to an unhealthy extreme. That's where this dude's beta tendencies come from I bet you anything. At least Dad is in the picture at all, so there's that.

Looks to me like another single mother/Hillary supporter who's son was doomed to turn out gay or extremely beta straight because she couldn't provide him with a male role model.

She is 90% at fault here.

[Kona]

(09-08-2016 05:14 PM)Going strong Wrote:  

something that makes me itch like I have never itched before

Oh man now he's all itchy.

I don't believe any of this crap.

Mormons are well connected. If this was true his church would have gotten together and hired some blackwater types to go down there and pay off the jail to release him.

Or at least pay somebody to smuggle him in some tough acting tinactin.

And what 24 year old travels with one of those CD case things like is in the picture? Or those 10 year old laptops.

Aloha!

[Genghis Khan]

(09-08-2016 11:14 PM)Jaydublin Wrote:  

(09-08-2016 09:05 PM)eatthishomie Wrote:  



And here's the possible root of the problem right here. Look at the way this dude's fucking mother poses with him in this picture. She almost looks as if she's treating him like a boyfriend. Her face is all close to his and her hand is nestled in his chest. If I didn't know any better I'd say she was his (older) girlfriend. It's one thing to be close to your mother (to a healthy degree), but this clearly shows that he is a mama's boy to an unhealthy extreme. That's where this dude's beta tendencies come from I bet you anything. At least Dad is in the picture at all, so there's that.

Looks to me like another single mother/Hillary supporter who's son was doomed to turn out gay or extremely beta straight because she couldn't provide him with a male role model.

She is 90% at fault here.

How the fuck is that dude only 24 years old? He looks like he's in his 40s. He definitely got bad luck with the excessive balding at that age. If he hit the gym and shaved his entire head, he might actually come out looking like a badass.