[Gpx90210]

Let some chick piss me off once again. I'm working on this...

Met this pretty hot chick from Venezuela at a local bar for drinks, from Tinder. She drove out about 45 minutes to meet me downtown AT 1130 PM mind you. Toward the end of the first drink, I drop my line about how I want to make her a special drink that I created and ask her to come with me. She gets up and then once she gets to the car, she insists she wants to take her own. I walk her to her car and once she gets there she drops the "I don't feel any chemistry, I tried but I'm sorry."

I look at her and I'm like, "what, you think I WANT to fuck you?"
She goes "Well, I don't know but I'm sorry I have to go."

SO my dumb ass, quite literally, tells her to go fuck herself and I dip. Bad, bad game decision. She could have easily called me later or another night.

How do you keep your temper in check when bitches are fucking with your head?

[CameraXL]

One should never let bitches fuck with your head. Stay cool.

[tomzestatlu]

I think this is OK.
I don´t say a girl has to bang first night, she can have some moral standarts (points for her). But if she didn´t escalate even aand little a say some shit about chemistry, then next her.
Recently I sat to some girl, started to talk with her, it was good conversation. I tried to make it more intimate, but she resisted when I touched her more. When the club closed, she asked me for my facebook. I told her not pretty things, even though she was really good. In my opinion, if it doesn´t end up at least with passionate kissing (we are both drunk), next her.

[trainwreck]

not sure she was fucking with your head, she seems to have been quite straightforward. maybe you should take things less personal.

[Gpx90210]

(06-28-2016 04:15 AM)tomzestatlu Wrote:  

I think this is OK.
I don´t say a girl has to bang first night, she can have some moral standarts (points for her). But if she didn´t escalate even aand little a say some shit about chemistry, then next her.
Recently I sat to some girl, started to talk with her, it was good conversation. I tried to make it more intimate, but she resisted. When the club closed, she asked me for my facebook. I told her not pretty things, even though she was really good. In my opinion, if it doesn´t end up at least with passionate kissing (we are both drunk), next her.

True shit. I was trying to method that was talked about here where you DONT escalate until back at your place. Not even a kiss. I'm surprised this bitch didn't even come back considering I didn't even move on her at the venue. I did touch her leg though, giving her slight signs. I'm tracing back my steps in the date to where I fucked up because this method worked on a way hotter girl the night before last.

[Dalaran1991]

(06-28-2016 03:55 AM)Gpx90210 Wrote:  

I look at her and I'm like, "what, you think I WANT to fuck you?"

Very bad game here. Why do you need to spell out the obvious?

Then again maybe you were already pissed and blurted it out.

Controlling temper with chicks = abundance mentality + awareness that chicks WILL flake on you and WILL waste your time. The only way around is to game better.

*shutting up and waiting for WIA to jump in and stealing the show*

[Gpx90210]

(06-28-2016 04:19 AM)Dalaran1991 Wrote:  

(06-28-2016 03:55 AM)Gpx90210 Wrote:  

I look at her and I'm like, "what, you think I WANT to fuck you?"

Very bad game here. Why do you need to spell out the obvious?

Then again maybe you were already pissed and blurted it out.

Controlling temper with chicks = abundance mentality + awareness that chicks WILL flake on you and WILL waste your time. The only way around is to game better.

*shutting up and waiting for WIA to jump in and stealing the show*

So when she resists and it's pretty obvious shes not coming, just be like "nice meeting with you, have a nice night?" Or some shit like that? Or should you keep trying to escalate her after she clearly said she doesn't wanna come back.

[Beirut]

Maybe you tried to move the date to your place too soon, didnt build enough comfort, hadnt read her as well as you thought.

Youre focusing on the events at the end and not the ones leading up to it.

I agree with whoever said she didnt do anything wrong. She didnt feel comfortabke enough to go home with you. Doesnt make her a bitch.

[Gpx90210]

(06-28-2016 04:40 AM)Beirut Wrote:  

Maybe you tried to move the date to your place too soon, didnt build enough comfort, hadnt read her as well as you thought.

Youre focusing on the events at the end and not the ones leading up to it.

I agree with whoever said she didnt do anything wrong. She didnt feel comfortabke enough to go home with you. Doesnt make her a bitch.

Ya, true. The game post I follow states to only buy the girl ONE drink then venue change to your place. I'm not going to be her ATM all night, especially at the bar we were at, real clutch place.

How many drinks do you buy your girls? The best girls I've experienced either leave with me after one drunk or they come to my pad and "pre game" but this usually only works on weekends.

[tomzestatlu]

The best is to do not buy drinks (in clubs). But it´s true, when I invite a girl for a date, I think it´s OK to pay. Anyway, on date girls usually don´t drink too much, so it´s not too expensive. And I haven´t recently met any cocktail bitches, the most of the girls enjoy beer or wine.
When I am in club and meet girl, that seems to get laid with me, I usually change from beer to water or cola, so I am able to do something later. And girl usually does the same.

[Physician]

It was a shit test, and you failed.

Maybe you haven't escalated well enough at the venue ?

You don't seem to have invested much in this encounter, so why be all that angry ?

Don't let them get to your head. It's what they like to do best.

[Beirut]

The post youre following and quoting is fantastic, but i think all game advice serves as guidelines for beginners to build on and not take litterally forever, and as a backbone to use as crutch until you get enough experience.

Personnally, i ask a girl out, i pay. Its a non issue for me. As for how many drinks, again a non issue. You have to judge and calibrate on the spot. I will say that with a high percentage of girls, i dont think many dates end after one drink and back to your place. But i come from a different culture/social scene.

I think if youre gonna follow the one drink rule, then that will be a high volume /low reward move to use to just bang a lot of quantity.

If were gonna make up a random criteria for quality girls, id say the 3 dates rule is more realistic. But again, judge and calibrate on the spot.

[TravelerKai]

(06-28-2016 03:55 AM)Gpx90210 Wrote:  

Let some chick piss me off once again. I'm working on this...

Met this pretty hot chick from Venezuela at a local bar for drinks, from Tinder. She drove out about 45 minutes to meet me downtown AT 1130 PM mind you. Toward the end of the first drink, I drop my line about how I want to make her a special drink that I created and ask her to come with me. She gets up and then once she gets to the car, she insists she wants to take her own. I walk her to her car and once she gets there she drops the "I don't feel any chemistry, I tried but I'm sorry."

I look at her and I'm like, "what, you think I WANT to fuck you?"
She goes "Well, I don't know but I'm sorry I have to go."

SO my dumb ass, quite literally, tells her to go fuck herself and I dip. Bad, bad game decision. She could have easily called me later or another night.

How do you keep your temper in check when bitches are fucking with your head?

Your issue has nothing to do with game.

You need to read a few books/videos on anger.

https://www.amazon.com/Beyond-Anger-Guid...ms?ie=UTF8

https://www.amazon.com/Anger-Busting-101...op?ie=UTF8

https://www.amazon.com/Anger-Trap-Yourse...2T5RG73YTD


If you can manage to even read a skinny book like the second one, targeted towards wife beaters, and dudes that are technically blue pill and learn something from it, then you might have a chance to correct your issues.

Otherwise, if you maintain a haughty or arrogant attitude towards it, you will either figure it out through trial and error (knowledge/wisdom), or lose your temper with the wrong woman and end up dead or in jail as a result of it. You are now in a race for the first method. Reading about anger can help you take a massive shortcut, but that is up to you.

[TravelerKai]

(06-28-2016 04:21 AM)Gpx90210 Wrote:  

(06-28-2016 04:19 AM)Dalaran1991 Wrote:  

(06-28-2016 03:55 AM)Gpx90210 Wrote:  

I look at her and I'm like, "what, you think I WANT to fuck you?"

Very bad game here. Why do you need to spell out the obvious?

Then again maybe you were already pissed and blurted it out.

Controlling temper with chicks = abundance mentality + awareness that chicks WILL flake on you and WILL waste your time. The only way around is to game better.

*shutting up and waiting for WIA to jump in and stealing the show*

So when she resists and it's pretty obvious shes not coming, just be like "nice meeting with you, have a nice night?" Or some shit like that? Or should you keep trying to escalate her after she clearly said she doesn't wanna come back.

You are looking at this as a Move 1 then what do I say "X"?

This isn't a matter of technique. You are missing mindset and frame. More than that, you have no peace in your own mind.

You are essentially trying to manipulate a woman's emotions with game, when you hardly have control of your own emotional state. Applecart before the horse anyone?

Irritation shows physically to a trained eye but even more so to a woman. Women pick up on these signals. That is why she cut you off completely and quickly left. She felt threatened like you were capable of escalating to a physical level like a slap or punch.

Even non-verbal frustration shows itself to women. A clinched fist, the skin on your neck getting too tight looking, veins popping out, sweat on your head, red face, fidgeting, etc. I could on and on. They see this, and you have absolutely no idea that you just spooked the puss.

Communication is not just verbal. If you cannot straighten out these issues, no "magical lines" will help you at all.

[CleanSlate]

(06-28-2016 10:08 AM)TravelerKai Wrote:  

https://www.amazon.com/Beyond-Anger-Guid...ms?ie=UTF8

I second this book recommendation because I read it myself way back then. I had an anger problem back in college and it got worse as time went on. It wasn't due to women or lack of game specifically, but it was due to rage issues borne from getting bullied back in elementary school.

I had always known that I had anger issues growing up and I knew exactly how it started, but I didn't do anything about it so it got worse. Self control is like a muscle that you exercise on a daily basis. You don't exercise it, that muscle atrophies.

Things came to a head when I flipped a table over in the cafeteria in college, and that was when I knew I had a serious problem and sought for help. The school counselor recommended I read this book and it is a must read.

It's important to remember that the anger does not go away. But you learn how to control it, never by holding it down inside, but by channeling it to express your anger constructively instead of destructively.

Read this book.

[TravelerKai]

(06-28-2016 10:32 AM)CleanSlate Wrote:  

(06-28-2016 10:08 AM)TravelerKai Wrote:  

https://www.amazon.com/Beyond-Anger-Guid...ms?ie=UTF8

I second this book recommendation because I read it myself way back then. I had an anger problem back in college and it got worse as time went on. It wasn't due to women or lack of game specifically, but it was due to rage issues borne from getting bullied back in elementary school.

I had always known that I had anger issues growing up and I knew exactly how it started, but I didn't do anything about it so it got worse. Self control is like a muscle that you exercise on a daily basis. You don't exercise it, that muscle atrophies.

Things came to a head when I flipped a table over in the cafeteria in college, and that was when I knew I had a serious problem and sought for help. The school counselor recommended I read this book and it is a must read.

It's important to remember that the anger does not go away. But you learn how to control it, never by holding it down inside, but by channeling it to express your anger constructively instead of destructively.

Read this book.

Wow. You and I always have so much in common it's crazy sometimes. I used martial arts to help me deal with my bullying issues growing up as a kid, but only started struggling tremendously when I got into my mid 20s and really lost control. Only when I had a silverback sized gorilla fit, I realized that I had a serious problem. I could not believe I was getting so angry at little stuff and I felt like a child on the spot.

I found those books and read them and got some counseling/life coaching on top of that. I also found out that a certain medication was making my blood pressure really high as well. I also made big diet changes back then as well. I ate certain things every week that I no longer eat. Every little bit helps when addressing anger.

[BassPlayaYo]

Drove 45 minutes? 11:30 pm? This woman was DTF but your energy and anger issues totally blew you out of the water. Anger management suggestions here are right on point.

[Gpx90210]

Wow, some really good advise here guys. You all are very helpful, almost like a family. I'm going to get that book that you all suggested and give it a read, I really appreciate you all taking the time to share those links with me.

I agree that women can easily pick up on non-verbals. I played the scenario out in my mind last night and I can kinda understand why she didn't want to go back to the pad with me. Even if not that night, I could have just told her to have a nice night like nothing happen and then met her at a later date.

It's all a learning process and I'm enjoying it. Self-improvement is the best thing you can do for yourself.

[XPQ22]

Anger is mostly about ego. That's why Patrice talked so much about trying to lose it.

Do things anger me? Sure, all the time, big and small. But before I lose my temper I try to make a habit of holding back for ten seconds and thinking: "How will this benefit me?"

And 90% of the time you realize...it won't. If game is about not doing things that don't help you get what you want out of life, then anger is right there at the top of the list.

You have to think about social interactions a bit like a chess player would and be several moves ahead. "If I say this, they're likely to say this. And then I'll say this, and they'll likely say that." You can't run the script forward forever, but it's usually not too hard to be two or three moves ahead.

When people get angry with me over small things, I can almost always tell they didn't go in with a game plan - they're just thinking with the monkey brain. They might say "Hey idiot, watch where you're going!", and then the average person might say "Fuck off, asshole." And then where do you go with that? For me, there's nowhere to go except an option which is useless and unacceptable.

So if the end step is useless and unacceptable, why make any of the steps? It's just pride, mostly. I don't know if self-important pride gets anyone laid very often.

[RatInTheWoods]

(06-28-2016 12:07 PM)BassPlayaYo Wrote:  

Drove 45 minutes? 11:30 pm? This woman was DTF but your energy and anger issues totally blew you out of the water. Anger management suggestions here are right on point.

This is why he was pissed I guess, it was in the bag. Nothing going to piss you off like stealing defeat from the jaws of a victory.

Two things:

1) we don't know what you did/said/framed to get her out of the mood. It could be a hundred things, we will never know.

2) Once its lost, there is no gain in losing your temper/frame. Its gone its gone.

In life, it's important for you now to work out ways to STOP OTHER PEOPLE CONTROLLING YOUR EMOTIONS.

The minute you don't let others control your emotions is the minute you are set free.

This is the huge part of your life and happiness that needs to be worked on next, and not just for getting laid, it has benefits throughout all aspects of your life and other relationships, friends, family, work etc.

[XPQ22]

(06-28-2016 04:35 PM)RatInTheWoods Wrote:  

In life, it's important for you now to work out ways to STOP OTHER PEOPLE CONTROLLING YOUR EMOTIONS.

The minute you don't let others control your emotions is the minute you are set free.

It should be qualified a bit that it's impossible to rid oneself entirely of having emotions controlled, and probably not even desirable.

The reason sociopaths lack empathy is because to feel empathy, in a way one has to let one's emotions be manipulated, i.e. be able to feel what another person feels without conscious effort. It feels too much like overbearing control to them. They're not big into it.

[RatInTheWoods]

(06-28-2016 04:40 PM)XPQ22 Wrote:  

(06-28-2016 04:35 PM)RatInTheWoods Wrote:  

In life, it's important for you now to work out ways to STOP OTHER PEOPLE CONTROLLING YOUR EMOTIONS.

The minute you don't let others control your emotions is the minute you are set free.

It should be qualified a bit that it's impossible to rid oneself entirely of having emotions controlled, and probably not even desirable.

The reason sociopaths lack empathy is because to feel empathy, in a way one has to let one's emotions be manipulated, i.e. be able to feel what another person feels without conscious effort. It feels too much like overbearing control to them. They're not big into it.

Interesting point you raise XP, yes it's true don't be a robot. But instead of controlled, maybe we should say "easily controlled" or manipulated even.

Some chick you just met rejecting you causes anger - too easily affected.

Caught wife of 20 years cheating.... - if you don't get your emotions affected you are a robot.

Somewhere between those extremes is where you should aim for, mines pretty close to robot and it makes for a very happy life free from being yanked around by bitches.

[Gpx90210]

(06-29-2016 02:31 AM)RatInTheWoods Wrote:  

(06-28-2016 04:40 PM)XPQ22 Wrote:  

(06-28-2016 04:35 PM)RatInTheWoods Wrote:  

In life, it's important for you now to work out ways to STOP OTHER PEOPLE CONTROLLING YOUR EMOTIONS.

The minute you don't let others control your emotions is the minute you are set free.

It should be qualified a bit that it's impossible to rid oneself entirely of having emotions controlled, and probably not even desirable.

The reason sociopaths lack empathy is because to feel empathy, in a way one has to let one's emotions be manipulated, i.e. be able to feel what another person feels without conscious effort. It feels too much like overbearing control to them. They're not big into it.

Interesting point you raise XP, yes it's true don't be a robot. But instead of controlled, maybe we should say "easily controlled" or manipulated even.

Some chick you just met rejecting you causes anger - too easily affected.

Caught wife of 20 years cheating.... - if you don't get your emotions affected you are a robot.

Somewhere between those extremes is where you should aim for, mines pretty close to robot and it makes for a very happy life free from being yanked around by bitches.

It's true because when I get rejected when approaching, I could care less, because there is tons of pussy where I live. But when it's a bitch that is almost guaranteed I'm going to fuck and I have no other options, it pisses me off. So I get what you mean. Good advice.

[JuanQuinQuin]

(06-28-2016 03:55 AM)Gpx90210 Wrote:  

Let some chick piss me off once again. I'm working on this...

Met this pretty hot chick from Venezuela at a local bar for drinks, from Tinder. She drove out about 45 minutes to meet me downtown AT 1130 PM mind you. Toward the end of the first drink, I drop my line about how I want to make her a special drink that I created and ask her to come with me. She gets up and then once she gets to the car, she insists she wants to take her own. I walk her to her car and once she gets there she drops the "I don't feel any chemistry, I tried but I'm sorry."

I look at her and I'm like, "what, you think I WANT to fuck you?"
She goes "Well, I don't know but I'm sorry I have to go."

SO my dumb ass, quite literally, tells her to go fuck herself and I dip. Bad, bad game decision. She could have easily called me later or another night.

How do you keep your temper in check when bitches are fucking with your head?

You are letting women drag you into their frame. Enjoy the hunt, enjoy the woman's company. Be playful, and assertive which is different than being aggressive. Besides, Ill give you a tip about Venezuelan women.According to one of my plates, upper middle class Venezuelan girls usually do not put up to the 4 or 5th date. It seems that's their number. It used to be 3 in America but I think that went away went after the Meat Markets like POF, Tinder, and the likes were created.

[hydrogonian]

(06-28-2016 03:55 AM)Gpx90210 Wrote:  

Let some chick piss me off once again. I'm working on this...

Make working on it a priority. Anger kills game.

Quote:

Toward the end of the first drink, I drop my line about how I want to make her a special drink that I created and ask her to come with me.

Where were you taking her? Your apartment or house? After one drink? What was the conversation like leading up to this invitation? The line about making her a special drink is pretty weak without prior definite buy-in. That's the type of line that you use as an excuse to leave after she already wants you and you both understand what is happening, not as a line in itself.

Tinder or not, you would still need prior buy-in before making an excuse to break out once you already set the 'date' tone with drinks. You're essentially obligated to seduce her from then on out, even in the context of quick and dirty sex. Whatever you say is either seducing her or working against you. Mind you, if you are good at it it need not be a long conversation. If you are not good at it, you will need to claw your way back from every inept thing that comes out of your mouth.The only way to avoid it would be to have met her where you could have immediately gotten busy - and even then your dirty-verbal-seduction game should be tight enough. And even then, it might not be what she had in mind in terms of meeting a stranger and thus you might get resistance until your more extended verbal game proves tight.

Quote:

I look at her and I'm like, "what, you think I WANT to fuck you?"
She goes "Well, I don't know but I'm sorry I have to go."

Given where this went you really didn't have much hope, but as a rule never tell a girl that you don't want to fuck her. It's disingenuous and they know it, and it will almost always kill attraction unless you are extremely skilled; and even then I would question the purpose. If you are talking about fucking, always tell her that you want to fuck her. Of course, in a congruent way that makes her want to reciprocate. You have to kill the anger first.

Quote:

How do you keep your temper in check when bitches are fucking with your head?

She didn't fuck with your head. She actually seemed pretty graceful, considering.

Listen to what she said: She didn't "feel any chemistry". She expected better verbal game, to her taste. You assumed a sale and blew it when you tried to close too early, though it likely would not have gone well regardless of the amount of time spent in this case.

You need to have fun and stop worrying about the outcome. Your outcome dependence is making you emotional. Also, read some more game books that deal more with inner game than with tactics. The tactics only work when you have your inner game down. My advice is to start with material that deals either with radical honesty or with keeping your cool. Though, this really isn't a situation that should have made you upset. I can't think of any game book that would cover it, more or less specifically.