As I've mentioned before, I've been going to small (one day) EDM festivals and raves 2-4 times/month for a few months now. It's my go-to to get same night lays or at least prospect numbers for future dates.
A few key points:
General
- In many aspects, it's similar to Carnaval here in Brazil. It still demands a sort of aggresive and/or fast pick up style, but compared to Carnaval you need to tone it down a little.
- HAVE FUN. Everybody is enjoying themselves at these places. If you look bored or hate the music, it's going to be an uphill battle.
- Regarding rolling with a good crew: I find this to be absolutely indispensable. They are the ones that get you hyped up when you start to hit a slump (so common since they're such long events), and it's easier to mingle if you are in a group and the girl too - it just feels natural.
Peacocking and must have items
- Peacocking is a great tool if you are on the younger side. I would not recommend a full costume, but wearing a weird hat, mask, sunglasses, or having some interesting prop works great. Girls often want to try it out, take pictures, etc.
A few months ago a fellow RVFer (shout out!) went to one of these with me and my crew, and he had a bunch of props. He gave me a slinky bracelet like this:
It's the coolest shit ever.
It feels awesome and it's so much fun to play with it sober, but when you're high this thing is unbelievable (it tingles as it rolls up and down your arms). It's also fun because you can slide it to friends, make a circle. Girls can't get enough of it, and it's a great in with them - offer them the bracelet, non-chalantly show them how to use it, keep dancing and playing with them. It's FUN - this is the keyword in this whole experience.
- Always carry a lighter and a ton of chewing gum. It's so easy to open girls offering them a piece of gum or giving them the lighter when they're fidgeting around their purse or pockets trying to find it. I also like to bring cigarettes and rolling papers in case I feel like smoking or someone asks me for any.
- Wearing caps (truckers, flat bills) is cool if it fits your style. It helps with the sun, looks good (in the context of the festival) and allows you not to worry about your hair.
Always carry sunglasses. They'll help you look more composed if you're wasted, and definitely make you look better and fresher if you are partying until sunrise (even sober people look like zombies at 7am). You can ask girls to switch glasses with you and take a pic. This is also something I like to do from time to time:
Approaching and being social
- One of my sins in regular night game pickup is that I'm not aggressive enough. Here in Brazil, it's commonplace to see guys cavemanning girls, grabbing them and not letting go - and I often suffer because I'm slow or too soft.
But being too aggro at festivals is a bad way to approach - girls are often drunk or high, and being too touchy is a sure way to scare them or get into a fight with her circle of friends.
Instead, I've learned to do very non-committing approaches. I look at a girl and just dance in front of her or side by side. I don't get too close too fast. Give her some room, share a laugh. If I'm getting a good response, I'll hang and dance with her for a minute or two (anywhere from 2 to 8ft apart). Only then do I get closer until finally grabbing her by the waist and kissing them. I do very well with this approach.
Non-committing approaches can also be going up to a girl and saying:
You: I love your hat/boots/whatever!" *smile*
Her: Thanks! *smile*
You: *fist bump*
Her: *fist bump*
You: *goes back to dancing*
This is the best way to feel what her "temperature" is at.
Having said that, my wingman rarely ever does that. He's a really good looking guy (probably an 8 or 9). He usually just goes up to girls and says hi, or grabs their hands and shortens the distance if the girl is walking by. Yeah, it's good looking guy game, but it also works here.
- Approach often. Yes, there's a lot of girls with boyfriends; a lot of girls who are too drunk or high to communicate; a lot of girls who just want to listen to the music and dance, etc. If you get discouraged and quit after 5 approaches, festivals are not for you.
- Besides obviously approaching girls, befriending cool guys is also a good way to get an in with a group. And if you step on people's feet, bump into them, spill their drinks - ALWAYS apologize. Hell, if I make someone drop their drink I might even get them a new one. I've done it before in the past and the guy and his group (multiple chicks) hung out with me and my friends for the rest of the night.
- Share your stuff (if you have enough of it). For example, if I'm smoking a cigarette or a joint, I might offer a hit to whoever is nearby (obviously filter the people you are offering it to!). It's a simple way to make friends, and sometimes they'll offer whatever they have in return.
Dressed vs. shirtless
If you have a good physique and low BF%, taking off your shirt can be a valuable way to screen for girls who are DTF. Obviously this has a polarizing effect - girls who are into you will be even more, while girls who were on the fence or not interested will be repulsed. I've done it before more because it was so hot outside than because I wanted to show off. I'm not a fan of doing this but it can work for some guys. Definitely don't be the douche who takes of his shirt when it's cold out, or when the festival is just starting out (save it for a few hours in).
Who should you approach?
Your targets should be the girls who are from the middle to the back area of the dancefloor, or hanging out further out (possibly sitting down or having a break from the music). Girls who are right in front of the stage are usually too high or too focused on dancing and don't care about guys. It's also harder to move because usually the closer to the stage, the more packed the crowd is. Hanging out at choke points is also a good strategy: on the path to the women's bathrooms, on the smokers area (if indoors), around the entrance to the to VIP or backstage area, etc.
In conclusion, the takeaway words to doing well in this scene are:
- Have fun
- Look cool
- Don't get too high
- Don't try too hard
- Have fun (!)
A few key points:
General
- In many aspects, it's similar to Carnaval here in Brazil. It still demands a sort of aggresive and/or fast pick up style, but compared to Carnaval you need to tone it down a little.
- HAVE FUN. Everybody is enjoying themselves at these places. If you look bored or hate the music, it's going to be an uphill battle.
- Regarding rolling with a good crew: I find this to be absolutely indispensable. They are the ones that get you hyped up when you start to hit a slump (so common since they're such long events), and it's easier to mingle if you are in a group and the girl too - it just feels natural.
Peacocking and must have items
- Peacocking is a great tool if you are on the younger side. I would not recommend a full costume, but wearing a weird hat, mask, sunglasses, or having some interesting prop works great. Girls often want to try it out, take pictures, etc.
A few months ago a fellow RVFer (shout out!) went to one of these with me and my crew, and he had a bunch of props. He gave me a slinky bracelet like this:
It's the coolest shit ever.
It feels awesome and it's so much fun to play with it sober, but when you're high this thing is unbelievable (it tingles as it rolls up and down your arms). It's also fun because you can slide it to friends, make a circle. Girls can't get enough of it, and it's a great in with them - offer them the bracelet, non-chalantly show them how to use it, keep dancing and playing with them. It's FUN - this is the keyword in this whole experience.
- Always carry a lighter and a ton of chewing gum. It's so easy to open girls offering them a piece of gum or giving them the lighter when they're fidgeting around their purse or pockets trying to find it. I also like to bring cigarettes and rolling papers in case I feel like smoking or someone asks me for any.
- Wearing caps (truckers, flat bills) is cool if it fits your style. It helps with the sun, looks good (in the context of the festival) and allows you not to worry about your hair.
Always carry sunglasses. They'll help you look more composed if you're wasted, and definitely make you look better and fresher if you are partying until sunrise (even sober people look like zombies at 7am). You can ask girls to switch glasses with you and take a pic. This is also something I like to do from time to time:
Quote: (08-23-2016 01:49 PM)Ringo Wrote:
Move towards her dancing lightly and stare her in the face. Tilt my head forward, jokingly open my eyes and stretch them (implying "let me see your eyes") - can't find a better a pic, but something like this:
![[Image: 74865849-portrait-of-a-young-man-stretch...Q8fGNrL2eT]](http://cache2.asset-cache.net/gc/74865849-portrait-of-a-young-man-stretching-his-eyes-gettyimages.jpg?v=1&c=IWSAsset&k=2&d=FqzfQoFVOlxd92NgEfZxsA%2FMEo7MS9iVDIiX5uuKRFmpzOffEd%2FbNAQ8fGNrL2eT)
Approaching and being social
- One of my sins in regular night game pickup is that I'm not aggressive enough. Here in Brazil, it's commonplace to see guys cavemanning girls, grabbing them and not letting go - and I often suffer because I'm slow or too soft.
But being too aggro at festivals is a bad way to approach - girls are often drunk or high, and being too touchy is a sure way to scare them or get into a fight with her circle of friends.
Instead, I've learned to do very non-committing approaches. I look at a girl and just dance in front of her or side by side. I don't get too close too fast. Give her some room, share a laugh. If I'm getting a good response, I'll hang and dance with her for a minute or two (anywhere from 2 to 8ft apart). Only then do I get closer until finally grabbing her by the waist and kissing them. I do very well with this approach.
Non-committing approaches can also be going up to a girl and saying:
You: I love your hat/boots/whatever!" *smile*
Her: Thanks! *smile*
You: *fist bump*
Her: *fist bump*
You: *goes back to dancing*
This is the best way to feel what her "temperature" is at.
Having said that, my wingman rarely ever does that. He's a really good looking guy (probably an 8 or 9). He usually just goes up to girls and says hi, or grabs their hands and shortens the distance if the girl is walking by. Yeah, it's good looking guy game, but it also works here.
- Approach often. Yes, there's a lot of girls with boyfriends; a lot of girls who are too drunk or high to communicate; a lot of girls who just want to listen to the music and dance, etc. If you get discouraged and quit after 5 approaches, festivals are not for you.
- Besides obviously approaching girls, befriending cool guys is also a good way to get an in with a group. And if you step on people's feet, bump into them, spill their drinks - ALWAYS apologize. Hell, if I make someone drop their drink I might even get them a new one. I've done it before in the past and the guy and his group (multiple chicks) hung out with me and my friends for the rest of the night.
- Share your stuff (if you have enough of it). For example, if I'm smoking a cigarette or a joint, I might offer a hit to whoever is nearby (obviously filter the people you are offering it to!). It's a simple way to make friends, and sometimes they'll offer whatever they have in return.
Dressed vs. shirtless
If you have a good physique and low BF%, taking off your shirt can be a valuable way to screen for girls who are DTF. Obviously this has a polarizing effect - girls who are into you will be even more, while girls who were on the fence or not interested will be repulsed. I've done it before more because it was so hot outside than because I wanted to show off. I'm not a fan of doing this but it can work for some guys. Definitely don't be the douche who takes of his shirt when it's cold out, or when the festival is just starting out (save it for a few hours in).
Who should you approach?
Your targets should be the girls who are from the middle to the back area of the dancefloor, or hanging out further out (possibly sitting down or having a break from the music). Girls who are right in front of the stage are usually too high or too focused on dancing and don't care about guys. It's also harder to move because usually the closer to the stage, the more packed the crowd is. Hanging out at choke points is also a good strategy: on the path to the women's bathrooms, on the smokers area (if indoors), around the entrance to the to VIP or backstage area, etc.
In conclusion, the takeaway words to doing well in this scene are:
- Have fun
- Look cool
- Don't get too high
- Don't try too hard
- Have fun (!)
Datasheets São Paulo, BR | Diamantina, BR | Osijek, HR | My most reliable opener