[Cruisen_Chubby]

(05-02-2016 05:20 PM)GoldHawkStar Wrote:  

A couple more texts since I posted that screenshot. She just read the last one but no reply (about 30 minutes ago).

Kept it light. Didn't read kaotic's post until now, but also in general I've been getting mixed advice in this thread that I should either keep it light right now or set up a meet up asap.

That's it then. No double texts obviously. I'm throwing in the towel until next school year when I'll probably hit her up towards the beginning of the year and casually lead in to seeing if she's interested in a fuck buddy relationship like we were talking about. (Obviously that won't be my Day 1 conversation with her.) Probably set up a meet up/hang out but escalate quick unlike Saturday.

If, on the other hand, she does hit me up during this week, that means I'm going for it. I'm gonna try to set something up before she leaves.

Anyway, I did this to myself. The good is that I know now that if I could do the weekend over, I would get the bang. I know what I did wrong, I know where I fucked up. Learn, adapt, move on.

You care more about this girl than you lead on. You don't need to impress anyone here; we're here to help you.

The statement I put in bold above just reeks of Oneitus. Do NOT let the summer pass by thinking you have some poon on lock for next year. I will bet you dollar for doughnuts that she will have a boyfriend by that time. Sexually forward women who swear like sailors are beta bait and WILL be scooped up.

Do a Hank Moody "soft-next" and find a couple new chicks for the summer.

FYI-- Don't try to negotiate a Fuck Buddy agreement. It makes the woman feel cheap and it makes you look very transaction based and weird. This is a subject best acted upon and not verbally acknowledged.

[Rhyme or Reason]

I agree with Cruisen_Chubby, it would appear you're more invested in her than you would like to admit, which is ok...but it's important to remember you're young and you'll get over this as fast as you got into it.

As I said before the advice given by the senior members here was spot on with regards to handle this type of situation in the future. However, I disagree with the advice given that you should try to salvage the situation. You see, it's not about how to salvage this situation. Or any situation.

All this planning about hitting her up in the future is, as was stated above, the stuff oneitis is made of. I don't know your exact age, but since you said you're in uni I'd assume your no older than 22.


Know this: You will experience pain in the future. Pain caused by oneitis. It's normal and a major part of your development as a man. Just ask anyone here, they will tell you the same. You would be best served here by simply charging it to the game and moving on. Employ the soft next, like Cruisen said. It doesn't mean you tell her off, it doesn't mean you get worked up and lay into her about what a catch you are and how shes missing out. It simply means you take a look in the rearview, know where you fucked up, and take some notes...which you seem to have already done.

Do not try to salvage this connection with this broad because you're already on the back foot. If she hits you up, play it cool and set up a meet. That's only if she hits you up. The reason I'm taking a hard stance on that is because further texting / mewling about with this bitch is serves to only damage your confidence further and get your male hamster spinning, and stroke her ego which is the last god damned thing you need right now. It doesn't mean you're giving up. It means the on the next go around (to clarify: the NEXT GIRL) you will be armed with that much more experience.

The real lesson here as was stated earlier is not to expect anything. You had her up on a pedestal before you met. That was where you fucked up. Sure, you also fucked up by not busting a move, but in retrospect that was an afterthought and was simply a manifestation of what you had built this girl into in your mind by the time it came down to making moves. Who this girl really is, and who she is in your mind are two VERY different things. Trust me on that. I don't care how many boxes she checks on the "cool girl list". Trump supporter? Pfft. Anti feminist? yawn. None of that means shit and was probably bullshit made up by her so that she could appeal to you more. And there's nothing wrong with that! But what's important here is that you let your image of her cloud your judgment when it came to game time. What if she told you she had no opinions on anything? What if she put out the vibe that she was just a walking fuck toy? (Hint: she is) Would you have hesitated to bust a move then? Your own idealistic vision of reality is what fucked your game here.

[Stallion]

Fuck... this sounds totally like me.

a) I used to have performance anxiety and get nervous... it got better after the 10th notch... so the only solution is... fuck more random girls.

b) When I had less experience I would make up all those stories on my mind about what would happen... Or think about how I will do this and say that with this girl... just let it go and live in the present. You screwed up with this girl... go for the next one. It may not be a bad idea to lower your standards a bit (5 or 6) for until you have at least 5 notches.


And also... with nervousness and inexperience comes indecision... I was too scared to move too fast, or make the first move... sometimes I'm still too slow, and always regret it. I think subconsciously it's a fear of rejection... which is stupid because if she agrees to get to your place, with alcohol involved.... she wants you to make the move, she would never reject.

[Stun]

GH,

Papaya and kaotic and Hank are all pretty on point and made me realize that in a meta way, the best thing you can do for your text game is talk to more girls live. You will get shit tested on the spot and it will improve your reaction time so that when you see a text test you'll feel like it's in slow motion.

[PapayaTapper]

(05-03-2016 03:44 PM)Stallion Wrote:  

Fuck... this sounds totally like me.

a) I used to have performance anxiety and get nervous... it got better after the 10th notch... so the only solution is... fuck more random girls.

b) When I had less experience I would make up all those stories on my mind about what would happen... Or think about how I will do this and say that with this girl... just let it go and live in the present. You screwed up with this girl... go for the next one. It may not be a bad idea to lower your standards a bit (5 or 6) for until you have at least 5 notches.


And also... with nervousness and inexperience comes indecision... I was too scared to move too fast, or make the first move... sometimes I'm still too slow, and always regret it. I think subconsciously it's a fear of rejection... which is stupid because if she agrees to get to your place, with alcohol involved.... she wants you to make the move, she would never reject.

This man gets it

"No decision is a decision...a bad one"

Play on!

[redbeard]