[fastlane9]

Hey,

I am 22 years old, about 5'9 and in great shape (i hit the gym regulary 3years+).
I dress nice and have sorta "model look" - short beard and strong jaw. I am happy with my looks and I feel comfortable in my skin.

Even though I have little social anxiety in "daily life", I don't have a problem approaching girl in the club.

My biggest insecurity? My height - especially in clubs, because girls usually have heels and tend to be same height or even taller than me.

Ok so let me tell about 4 girls this weekend

Venue #1


Girl #1 - 19yo

I stop her when she is leaving the dance floor (with 1 friend) because she looked familiar

Me: Sarah??
Her : XXX
Me: Where are you going?
Her: To smoke
Me: Alright, let's go

I lead the way to smoking area (along with her and my friend)
We casually talk and it's going very well. She is smiling, fixing her hair, when I didn't hear her, she hugged me to speak closer to my ear.

I really liked this girls outgoingness and shit.
Out of sudden her friend says to her "we have to go" and they literally run away.
I didn't want to appear needy so I kinda forgot about her.

I didn't see her until we left the venue at same time.

Me: Why did you run away earlier? If you didn't like me you could just said it straight away

She is still pretty cool and seems interested.

Me: Alright, we are going out next week, save yourself.

She does, correct number, also real name (verified over FB later).

I text her next day

Me: "hey, whats up?"
Her: Whose number is this? <-- I feel alarmed at this point
Me: <group photo with me>
Her: the guy on the left, a?
Me: memory finally returning, huh?
Her: it returned already a while ago
Me: O really, what is my name then?
Her: I didn't even bother to remember yesterday

That really messed up with my head - I have no idea where I fucked up.
My theory is that she probably saw me approaching some other girl. But why would she give me number at the end?

Girl #2 - 18yo

She is dancing with her friend near me. I grab her, she dances with me (looks like she is enjoying) but for some reason I have trouble separating her from her friend (that stupid 2 girl circle dancing for theirselves thing). She is smiling though and all seems well.

Me: What's your name?
Her: X, and yours? <-- I always consider this as strong sign that girls likes me. In 9/10 cases when they ask back, I get atleast make out.
Me: Alright, put in your number, we will go out next week <-- She does, I ring her, the number is correct, so it is her name which I later verified over FB

I go for a smoke and text her in some mins "where are you?" and boom, no response. I probably fucked up because I let her go, but she was always returning to her stupid friend, and I didn't want to be too intrusive

Girl #3 - age unknown but I would say 19-20 max

She is dancing quite far from me, but I caught her looking in my direction.
I approach and dance like 3 minutes with her. She complies, I twirl her and everything is going well. I thought she's mine already. Then I notice she is trying to get away for some reason. Then she says "We can dance but nothing more" - I didn't want to look needy and I said "Yeah sure" - and the same second she goes away.


Venue #2

Girl #4 - 24 yo

I hit new venue, light a smoke, see her dancing and approach

Me: What's your name?
Her: XXX
Me: Alright, finish your drink and let's dance

We dance like 5minutes (she loves grinding), soon I escalate and kiss her.
She is giving shit about she doesn't want to leave her friend (problem I always face when approaching set from 2 girls group). I somehow manage to convince her, we leave and we fuck.

Questions:

I noticed girls usually think I am like 25years old. Maybe that is turning away younger girls?

Maybe they are scared of my muscle? I am not hulk, but apparently it's noticeable even through long sleeved shirt. I noticed I am having far bigger success rate when wearing shirts compared to tshirts or tank tops where muscles are more visible. But older chicks seem to digg that.

Maybe I am approaching girls under my level and they perceive me as "fuck boy" who just wants to take advantage of them?

Thanks for all your comments

[Andre]

(04-11-2016 12:22 PM)fastlane9 Wrote:  

Hey,

I am 22 years old, about 5'9 and in great shape (i hit the gym regulary 3years+).
I dress nice and have sorta "model look" - short beard and strong jaw. I am happy with my looks and I feel comfortable in my skin.

Even though I have little social anxiety in "daily life", I don't have a problem approaching girl in the club.

My biggest insecurity? My height - especially in clubs, because girls usually have heels and tend to be same height or even taller than me.

Ok so let me tell about 4 girls this weekend

Venue #1


Girl #1 - 19yo

I stop her when she is leaving the dance floor (with 1 friend) because she looked familiar

Me: Sarah??
Her : XXX
Me: Where are you going?
Her: To smoke
Me: Alright, let's go

I lead the way to smoking area (along with her and my friend)
We casually talk and it's going very well. She is smiling, fixing her hair, when I didn't hear her, she hugged me to speak closer to my ear.

I really liked this girls outgoingness and shit.
Out of sudden her friend says to her "we have to go" and they literally run away.
I didn't want to appear needy so I kinda forgot about her.

I didn't see her until we left the venue at same time.

Me: Why did you run away earlier? If you didn't like me you could just said it straight away

She is still pretty cool and seems interested.

Me: Alright, we are going out next week, save yourself.

She does, correct number, also real name (verified over FB later).

I text her next day

Me: "hey, whats up?"
Her: Whose number is this? <-- I feel alarmed at this point
Me: <group photo with me>
Her: the guy on the left, a?
Me: memory finally returning, huh?
Her: it returned already a while ago
Me: O really, what is my name then?
Her: I didn't even bother to remember yesterday

That really messed up with my head - I have no idea where I fucked up.
My theory is that she probably saw me approaching some other girl. But why would she give me number at the end?

My comment
Girl # 1. In the whole interaction it seems you are following her whereas you should be taking the lead. This is not a big issue that you join her smoking, but later when you say "why did you...." you basically scream that you are needy, you are trying to qualify yourself and moreover asking her why don´t you want me. She gives you the number because girls give away numbers to anyone, getting the number is not the hard part usually. I think you screwed up the first night and she just give you the number to be nice/not make a scene/answer your questions of why not.

"We need to leave" - This is classic and from my experience the friend(s) usually say this when the conversation has died out or you didn´t pay attention to the friend as well. Here a wingman would go in handy, but you should´ve paid attention to her friend as well. However, sometimes you can´t control it if her friend is just being a basic bitch, thus. Next her.

Girl #2 - 18yo

She is dancing with her friend near me. I grab her, she dances with me (looks like she is enjoying) but for some reason I have trouble separating her from her friend (that stupid 2 girl circle dancing for theirselves thing). She is smiling though and all seems well.

Me: What's your name?
Her: X, and yours? <-- I always consider this as strong sign that girls likes me. In 9/10 cases when they ask back, I get atleast make out.
Me: Alright, put in your number, we will go out next week <-- She does, I ring her, the number is correct, so it is her name which I later verified over FB

I go for a smoke and text her in some mins "where are you?" and boom, no response. I probably fucked up because I let her go, but she was always returning to her stupid friend, and I didn't want to be too intrusive

My comment
Here again it seems you have problems with handling the friend. This seems like a very short interaction and again, girls give numbers to anyone. There is no reason why she should text you back if you don´t build any comfort or attraction except for just asking for her name. I think you should´ve worked better with including her friend in the interaction, and if that didn´t work out, just next her.

Girl #3 - age unknown but I would say 19-20 max

She is dancing quite far from me, but I caught her looking in my direction.
I approach and dance like 3 minutes with her. She complies, I twirl her and everything is going well. I thought she's mine already. Then I notice she is trying to get away for some reason. Then she says "We can dance but nothing more" - I didn't want to look needy and I said "Yeah sure" - and the same second she goes away.

My comment
Shit test, just ignore and dance away and escalate

Venue #2

Girl #4 - 24 yo

I hit new venue, light a smoke, see her dancing and approach

Me: What's your name?
Her: XXX
Me: Alright, finish your drink and let's dance

We dance like 5minutes (she loves grinding), soon I escalate and kiss her.
She is giving shit about she doesn't want to leave her friend (problem I always face when approaching set from 2 girls group). I somehow manage to convince her, we leave and we fuck.

My comment
Here, what did you do differently with her friend here? Do that in the earlier situations as well, however, sometimes it might be luck and the girl just really wants to fuck, then they will give shit about their friend.

Questions:

I noticed girls usually think I am like 25years old. Maybe that is turning away younger girls?

My comment
Age doesn´t matter, especially when you are in your 20s. I´ve been with 18-19 year olds even though I´m 25+. A matter of fact, a lot of girls are attracted to older guys, even way past 25.

Maybe they are scared of my muscle? I am not hulk, but apparently it's noticeable even through long sleeved shirt. I noticed I am having far bigger success rate when wearing shirts compared to tshirts or tank tops where muscles are more visible. But older chicks seem to digg that.

Maybe I am approaching girls under my level and they perceive me as "fuck boy" who just wants to take advantage of them?

My comment
If you approach girls in a lower league than you, they usually are DTF faster than regular girls. There are of course exceptions, but I wouldn´t bet on that being the problem.

Thanks for all your comments

[WestIndianArchie]

Move to newb board.

You're basically uncalibrated, like a bull in a China shop.
It's good that you can approach and get physical, but beyond that you're clueless as to how to channel that energy into a bang.

WIA

[XPQ22]

It seems kind of like you're not really running "game", and while as WIA is right that it's good that you can approach at all, it sounds from your description that you're just "spam approaching" and then coasting on your good looks and hoping for that to do all the work for you. Sounds like you got laid once because you just hammered away at the talent indiscriminately until you were fortunate enough to hit on a girl who was DTF without too much effort.

These young club girls are getting approached by other young, in shape guys all the time. What sets you apart from them? It's definitely not your conversation or texting.

Quote:

Maybe they are scared of my muscle?

Did you take the time to do a little intelligence-gathering to note if these girls on the dance floor at least had a few drinks in them and weren't spending all their time there, or had been flailing away on the dance floor stone sober for two hours, self-absorbed in la-la land?