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Going after sloppy seconds
01-12-2016, 02:07 AM
I'm assuming the girl knows you guys are friends?
It's interesting that you place no accountability on her, as if she has no choice in seeing your friend or not...
If things ended badly between you guys then she is most likely seeing him as a response tactic to get under your skin.
The absolute best thing you could do is show that you don't give her a second thought. Talk about other girls around your friend, talk about how you fuck them, how they suck you off, anal, etc., then be sure to talk about what you did with your ex in the same category. If he gets pissed its his problem, you're not the loser that catches feels for girls of your friends.
Make sure she knows that you haven't thought about her and are constantly out on the prowl (dread game) and see how long their "relationship" lasts before you hear from her. Whatever you do, DO NOT display any hint that them being together bothers you. That is total scarcity mentality and above all it is exactly what she wants.
two scoops
two genders
two terms
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Going after sloppy seconds
02-05-2016, 01:41 PM
So here's a 4 week update - I've maintained no contact with the girl in the OP and have been hitting on new girls and had some dates. I still have to talk to the guy almost every day but have kept things cordial and business-related.
Last week, though, I got set off. He casually mentioned he might be off the market soon. As far as I know the girl from the OP is the only girl he's been talking to or pursuing. So there's a chance they might be dating. But he's also shown he has no semblance or game or understanding signal cues, so it could still be he's just chatting with her like an orbiter and thinking she wants him.
Yesterday he also mentioned he was texting about the plot of a movie with the ex of a good friend of his, even though the break-up was nasty as hell and fucked his friend up (I sort of know these two and have met them). I also remembered that his last long-term relationship was with a girl another friend of his had been with, even though once again that girl and that friend had a messy break-up. He's definitely thirsty and not against throwing close male friends under the bus for even the slightest whiff of pussy.
I'm seeing him in a social function tomorrow where beer will be flowing, and when he's drunk he doesn't shut up. I guarantee he'll talk about what's going on with the girl in the OP. I've since adopted a zen attitude towards it - Things didn't work out with the girl and I for a reason, and if she gets with my friend then so be it.
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Going after sloppy seconds
02-05-2016, 01:43 PM
Also, a few people have also asked why I'm not mad at the girl - In a sense I am, but I don't want to waste any more mental energy on her than I have to. I'm more disappointed in my friend for actively wanting to go against my wishes to get with a girl, especially one who I was really into but crashed and burned and left a bad taste in my mouth. Between this and the past times he's sided with girls over good friends of his I can only assume he's a bitch that you can't trust in situations like this. It sucks, but I'll have to be more careful around him.
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Going after sloppy seconds
02-05-2016, 02:14 PM
From your explanation this cat sounds like a scumbag. He's not your friend. If you work with him then keep things business but phase him out of your social life. That's my recommendation.
Good on you for moving on and getting new girls. Stick with that and don't let bottom feeders drag you down.
Going after sloppy seconds
02-06-2016, 11:06 PM
When you don't have Game.
There are levels one has to stoop to in order to have a shot at laying.
This is one of them.
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Going after sloppy seconds
02-06-2016, 11:23 PM
I've been saying this shit for years:
The more variables you introduce into a situation the more fucked up you make the situation. This applies to sales, game, finances, family, friends. It's one of the few things I think is virtually universal.
Sure, she's a hot slut you've been imagining railing for a good while--but your boy's the one hitting that.
They break up.
Now's your chance.
DO.NOT.DO.IT.
I have a few friends I'm fortunate enough to have known for over 10 years. I'm a lucky bastard, I know. Even if one of them split with his girlfriend and I have every right to smash that hoe because he isn't thinking about her I don't think it's worth compromising (as a possible consequence) that friendship.
Even if a dude says "hey bro, I don't care. You can fuck her." We all know that in his heart of hearts he will be weirded out at some level. I know I would if one of my boys did that. To me, that means he was eyeing my girl the entire time. I'm not saying he was going to make a move on her, but the potential was there.
Now I'm not some blue pill faggot who thinks guys can just shut off their sex drive, but if I'm truly friends with a guy then I won't put myself in a situation where I have the ability to smash one of his exes. Such complications and transgressions can always come back to haunt you and may cast doubt on the future of your friendship with that guy.
As many of us know, a good friendship is really hard to come by. It's hard to appreciate that when you're 21 and you're in college and new opportunities to meet cool people are foisted upon you daily by college life. Post-college life you really start count who your friends are and who was just paying lip service to the idea of friendship.
That's why when my friend splits with a chick I do my best to minimize any and all contact with her. Some girls will even actively hunt an exes friends to try and hurt him (stupid chick logic) but it can do damage if you don't see it for what it is.
I will be checking my PMs weekly, so you can catch me there. I will not be posting.
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Going after sloppy seconds
02-07-2016, 03:26 AM
OP why are you sweating a dude cleaning up your scraps? Any chick you've banged that's not a virgin could be considered scraps of another man. Stop focusing on the little shit and enjoy yourself.
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Going after sloppy seconds
02-07-2016, 01:15 PM
So my suspicions were correct - At the function last night he told me he was seeing her. He also said she had no hard feelings towards me. I told him that I was fine with it, and whatever happens happens. He was seeing her anyway, it's not like me protesting it would do anything. I was around him for a while and everything was fine and civil.
Then about 2 hours in this girl """randomly""" shows up at the bar this event was at ("So weird, I had no clue she was coming here!" he said to all of us, even though he obviously invited her). She walked by me as she entered and looked at me, and being cordial I said hello. She just nodded and walked on by. I went outside for a smoke about 15 minutes later and she was out there, then she went inside when she saw me (No hard feelings, my ass). Shit was getting awkward, so after another drink I left early with a buddy of mine and we did our own thing.
On the bright side, I can't see them working out based on what I know about game. If I was needy and had one-itis then he has SUPER one-itis, and he's been very vocal about how she's his special snowflake. He's also been a major cockblock to himself and others in the past based on his personality alone, and I've personally seen his neediness implode tons of situations with girls he was seeing. As 1026 said, this guy has no game, and without game nothing can help you when it comes to women.
Who knew that one of the best flings I ever had could've ended up with so much drama.