Someone posted a link to an interesting book in my Body Language datasheet thread and out of curiosity, I read through it.
This book is the Undercover Sex Signals, by Leil Lowendes, written in 2001 (with a revision in 2006).
She is a surprisingly honest author who talks in plain red pill language about the body language signs that women give off when they spot a guy they're interested in. While the writing is ok, not great, and her general dating tips are awful, her specific descriptions of these body language signs are excellent. She calls them the "undercover sex signals" or "USS" for short.
In my body language datasheet, I list 14 signs that a woman is interested in you. The author lists 26 of them! Many of these signs are related to posturing alone, though... the author just breaks them down into more detail than I did. Half of these signs I already know, and the other half I either have not noticed or not attributed any meaning to.
So let me summarize each of these 26 signs (mostly in my own words), and I'll try to use examples for each. Like I said in my datasheet, don't try to look for each sign in isolation... see if you can read them in batches of 2 or 3 at a time.
The 26 Undercover Sex Signals
1. The girlfriends giggling while gabbing about you
Pretty self explanatory there. You walk into a room and grab a table, and you see two girls a few tables away leaning into each other, stealing glances at you, whispering to each other and giggling.
Admittedly, I've never interpreted this as a sign of interest. I used to think it meant they were making fun of me, because that's what kids did in grade school.
As adults, when I'd see this happening, I'd furtively check to see if I'd spilled ketchup on my brand new shirt, or check whether my fly is open. It'll be interesting to see how I react to this next time I see this sign, knowing it's not making fun, but rather a sign of sexual interest.
2. The peekaboo
You spot a girl and she's engrossed in the restaurant's menu. Then she peeks just above the menu to steal a look at you, and quickly hides behind the menu. I've never really seen this in practice the way the author describes it, but maybe some of you have.
A variation of this that I have actually seen is when I look in her direction, she quickly looks away. Then I look away, and back at her, and catch her looking at me as she quickly turns her head away again.
3. The shy geisha who looks down and away
You make eye contact, and she looks down and away in a bashful way. That's a sign of interest. If her eyes stay on the same level or upward as she looks away, it means she's not interested. This is something I see almost every time I catch a girl looking at me, and one who is attracted.
The look-down-and-away is the most common sign that I see, and I believe it is universal across all countries and cultures. The fact that she looks down is her submission to you, as opposed to keeping her eyes level or upward.
4. The sidelong glance
This is the equivalent of a man's head-turn when a hot piece of ass walks by. Women have better peripheral vision than men, and they are more discreet when checking out men. So when you scan the room as you enter, look for sidelong glances as well as extended eye contact (longer than 1-2 seconds).
I remember being at a crowded happy hour after work one day not too long ago, and I was trying to get to the bar to order a drink. As I was moving through the crowd, I caught a girl following me with her eyes to the side while facing her group away from me. I approached, got her #, and texted her a couple hours later... ended up meeting her again later that night and taking her home for the bang.
5. The jewelry tug
Let's say she's wearing a necklace. When she sees you across the room or when you're chatting with her, she could be playing with her necklace. It's clearly an invitation for you to make your move on her, either approach or escalate depending on where you are with her.
I don't really remember noticing this explicitly, but maybe my subconscious picks up on it. The author says it's a pretty strong signal, so I'll be consciously watching for that.
6. Showing more skin
If you notice her dress seems to be falling off her shoulder, it is not accidental. She might also pull her blouse open ever so slightly. Game on and don't fuck it up. I've never really thought about it, but I would think this would be pretty easy for a red blooded male with healthy testosterone levels to pick up on.
7. The shoe dangle
I covered this in my datasheet already, but whenever you see a woman dangling her shoe/heel on her toes, she is wanting to get laid THAT night. If her subject of lust is you, better start lining up your logistics. That's your green light.
8. The close encounter
When you're meeting for the first time, observe how close she gets to you. If she gets within your personal space only for a fleeting moment, she's interested and she's testing to see how you react. Now's not the time to flinch.
9. Invading your personal space
Personal space is pretty subjective depending on culture and the environment you're in. Generally within 24 inches of a person is their personal space, give or take. If a girl momentarily gets closer to you than that while she's talking to you, she's sending you a sign. I think it's the same thing as when she puts her purse or drink within your personal space because she's getting more comfortable with you.
Note: I don't know why the author talks about personal space in 2 separate signs, not just one. There's a blurry distinction between 8 and 9 above, so I really see it as the same thing.
10. The innocent touch
I believe that if a woman is not interested in you, she will never touch you. Ever. By this I mean, unprompted touching. Shaking hands doesn't count because that is prompted touching. But if she touches you on her own accord, even by "accident", that should register as a blip on your radar.
Even more importantly, I reward this by smiling and touching her back, at a similar level of touch. For example, if she touched me on the forearm, I'll touch her back on the forearm or on her upper arm. If she touched my chest, I'll put my hand on the small of her back.
Not touching her after she touched you (perhaps because you're nervous or overthinking things) will fuck this up, and she will go cold on you.
11. Leaning to you
Another posturing sign, and you all know this one. It's common knowledge here to not lean in when talking to a girl. Best to let her do the leaning into you, and if she does this, you're on the right track.
12. Showing her palms
When she's talking to you and rests her head on her hand, how does she show her hand? Is her wrist/palm facing outward (to you) or inward (to herself)? Showing her palm toward you is good, showing her knuckles to you is bad.
If she's a smoker, look at how she displays her hand after she takes a whiff. Does her palm face toward you, or does it face away from you?
Or when she's yapping, does she cross her arms or does she make gestures that expose her palms to you?
13. Necking
If a girl has hair that runs down past her shoulders onto her chest, she might use both hands to flick that hair back, exposing her neck while doing so. When she does this in front of you, or while looking at you, she's interested and wants to submit to you.
14. Showing her underarm
When she strokes her hair behind her head with one arm, her underarm will show. If she's wearing a dress, and she does this while looking at you, she's most definitely interested.
15. Licking her lips
I love this one because I read lips. When she licks her lips, she's making them moist, thinking about kissing, and tantalizing you with what may come later that night.
Since this one is so obvious, many girls try to hide this or make a conscious effort not to do it. It's fun to see them squirm and reach for a chapstick instead. But soon enough, she'll forget and lick her lips anyway. You just got to catch it!
16. Primping
While you're with her, she might sneak a little extra makeup on when you're not looking. Say you go to the bathroom, and come back to see her face with a little fresher makeup and a little extra lipstick, she might have done a little primping while you were gone. Why do you think women carry their makeup kits in their purses everywhere they go?
17. Playing with her hair
We've all seen this one. You and her are talking, and she starts twirling her hair with her fingers. It's a sign of sexual nervousness, or a desire for you to be playing with her hair while pounding her from behind.
18. She caresses herself
When you see her touching herself on her neck, collarbone, arms, and thighs, you can be sure she has the tingles if you are also picking up on her other signs of interest.
19. Shoulder scrunch
It happens when she's laughing and feeling like a kid again, she scrunches her shoulders.
Honestly, I don't really put too much stock in this one. It seems like the author threw something out there at random, and it seems very personality-specific.
20. Perking up and thrusting her breasts
At the very moment you enter a room, watch for this one. When you step foot into a room, all the women in there will take stock of you with one glance, direct or peripheral. Scan the room to see which ones perk up in your presence.
Also, when you approach, you can tell if it's going to open successfully or not before you actually say your opener. When she sees you coming, see if she straightens up. You might see her breasts thrust outward a bit when she does that.
21. She copies your movements
The author seems to think that an interested woman will start copying your movements. The thinking here is that she wants to be on your wavelength so she starts mirroring you.
I don't think it's so much as being a copycat for every movement you make, but if you raise your glass to take a sip of your drink, watch to see if she does it too. You take a sip, and within 5 seconds, she does the same. Does she start copying certain gestures that you've made?
I've seen this a few times because I gesture a lot when I talk (like an Italian!) and I've always seen it as a good sign when she copies my gestures. But I would want to see other signs of interest as well, not just this one.
22. The suggestive suck
When a woman puts something in her mouth, our male brains perk up at the suggestive action. Be it a banana, a spoon, an ice cream, a swizzle stick, or even the ear hook of her glasses... if she puts it in her mouth, look for ANY hint of whether she does this suggestively. For example, she does it at slow motion while gazing into your eyes.
As I'm sure you've seen, girls love to use the banana to display this sign of blatant sexual interest.
23. Running her finger on her wine glass
The author says if a woman wants you, she might run her finger along the rim of her wine glass while thinking about touching you. Many guys mistake this as boredom, while on the contrary it is a strong sign of sexual interest.
Interesting. I've never seen a woman do this. Have you?
24. Being goofy
Sometimes a girl being goofy and silly doesn't appear as titillating as a seductress oozing with thick sexuality. Nevertheless, it is a sign of sexual interest. The excitement, tingles, and sexual nervousness can come out as giggling and goofiness.
Personally, I'm about 70% in agreement with this. I also think it means she is very comfortable with you, but I'd look for other signs that she is actually attracted in a sexual way.
25. The pose
When she gets into a ladylike pose by crossing her legs and sitting "pretty", see if she has been stealing glances at you. If so, this means the pose is for you. Approach!
But I think we'd be hard pressed to find any girls doing this whenever we go out. This is done better by more feminine women, and is becoming a lost art with the increasing masculinity of women these days.
26. Showing more leg
Now that's more like it. When she's wearing a skirt or dress, she could cross her legs and reveal more leg in your line of view.
Final Notes
I put these into a post for our benefit, because the author scatters these signs throughout the book and the sequence of the book is a bit disorganized. This writing style makes it hard for the reader to go back to reread the tips, so I put it all in one post so I could always review these before I go out.
The author also talks about how men should date women. While I give her an A- for the 26 signs of sexual interest, I give her an F for dating advice because she tells men to take women to expensive restaurants every other date starting on the first date. She talks about how men need to show that they have money by wining and dining them, having nice cars, taking them to nice places for vacation, etc.
I think she's hung up on this jet setter fantasy like all the IG hoes are doing, and we all know it's not necessary. See Hank Moody's posts on Game and Money.
That aside, I think it's a pretty good book to read if you need to brush up on your body language reading skills, which are a crucial part in executing a good pick up from meet to bang.
This book is the Undercover Sex Signals, by Leil Lowendes, written in 2001 (with a revision in 2006).
She is a surprisingly honest author who talks in plain red pill language about the body language signs that women give off when they spot a guy they're interested in. While the writing is ok, not great, and her general dating tips are awful, her specific descriptions of these body language signs are excellent. She calls them the "undercover sex signals" or "USS" for short.
In my body language datasheet, I list 14 signs that a woman is interested in you. The author lists 26 of them! Many of these signs are related to posturing alone, though... the author just breaks them down into more detail than I did. Half of these signs I already know, and the other half I either have not noticed or not attributed any meaning to.
So let me summarize each of these 26 signs (mostly in my own words), and I'll try to use examples for each. Like I said in my datasheet, don't try to look for each sign in isolation... see if you can read them in batches of 2 or 3 at a time.
The 26 Undercover Sex Signals
1. The girlfriends giggling while gabbing about you
Pretty self explanatory there. You walk into a room and grab a table, and you see two girls a few tables away leaning into each other, stealing glances at you, whispering to each other and giggling.
Admittedly, I've never interpreted this as a sign of interest. I used to think it meant they were making fun of me, because that's what kids did in grade school.
As adults, when I'd see this happening, I'd furtively check to see if I'd spilled ketchup on my brand new shirt, or check whether my fly is open. It'll be interesting to see how I react to this next time I see this sign, knowing it's not making fun, but rather a sign of sexual interest.
2. The peekaboo
You spot a girl and she's engrossed in the restaurant's menu. Then she peeks just above the menu to steal a look at you, and quickly hides behind the menu. I've never really seen this in practice the way the author describes it, but maybe some of you have.
A variation of this that I have actually seen is when I look in her direction, she quickly looks away. Then I look away, and back at her, and catch her looking at me as she quickly turns her head away again.
3. The shy geisha who looks down and away
You make eye contact, and she looks down and away in a bashful way. That's a sign of interest. If her eyes stay on the same level or upward as she looks away, it means she's not interested. This is something I see almost every time I catch a girl looking at me, and one who is attracted.
The look-down-and-away is the most common sign that I see, and I believe it is universal across all countries and cultures. The fact that she looks down is her submission to you, as opposed to keeping her eyes level or upward.
4. The sidelong glance
This is the equivalent of a man's head-turn when a hot piece of ass walks by. Women have better peripheral vision than men, and they are more discreet when checking out men. So when you scan the room as you enter, look for sidelong glances as well as extended eye contact (longer than 1-2 seconds).
I remember being at a crowded happy hour after work one day not too long ago, and I was trying to get to the bar to order a drink. As I was moving through the crowd, I caught a girl following me with her eyes to the side while facing her group away from me. I approached, got her #, and texted her a couple hours later... ended up meeting her again later that night and taking her home for the bang.
5. The jewelry tug
Let's say she's wearing a necklace. When she sees you across the room or when you're chatting with her, she could be playing with her necklace. It's clearly an invitation for you to make your move on her, either approach or escalate depending on where you are with her.
I don't really remember noticing this explicitly, but maybe my subconscious picks up on it. The author says it's a pretty strong signal, so I'll be consciously watching for that.
6. Showing more skin
If you notice her dress seems to be falling off her shoulder, it is not accidental. She might also pull her blouse open ever so slightly. Game on and don't fuck it up. I've never really thought about it, but I would think this would be pretty easy for a red blooded male with healthy testosterone levels to pick up on.
7. The shoe dangle
I covered this in my datasheet already, but whenever you see a woman dangling her shoe/heel on her toes, she is wanting to get laid THAT night. If her subject of lust is you, better start lining up your logistics. That's your green light.
8. The close encounter
When you're meeting for the first time, observe how close she gets to you. If she gets within your personal space only for a fleeting moment, she's interested and she's testing to see how you react. Now's not the time to flinch.
9. Invading your personal space
Personal space is pretty subjective depending on culture and the environment you're in. Generally within 24 inches of a person is their personal space, give or take. If a girl momentarily gets closer to you than that while she's talking to you, she's sending you a sign. I think it's the same thing as when she puts her purse or drink within your personal space because she's getting more comfortable with you.
Note: I don't know why the author talks about personal space in 2 separate signs, not just one. There's a blurry distinction between 8 and 9 above, so I really see it as the same thing.
10. The innocent touch
I believe that if a woman is not interested in you, she will never touch you. Ever. By this I mean, unprompted touching. Shaking hands doesn't count because that is prompted touching. But if she touches you on her own accord, even by "accident", that should register as a blip on your radar.
Even more importantly, I reward this by smiling and touching her back, at a similar level of touch. For example, if she touched me on the forearm, I'll touch her back on the forearm or on her upper arm. If she touched my chest, I'll put my hand on the small of her back.
Not touching her after she touched you (perhaps because you're nervous or overthinking things) will fuck this up, and she will go cold on you.
11. Leaning to you
Another posturing sign, and you all know this one. It's common knowledge here to not lean in when talking to a girl. Best to let her do the leaning into you, and if she does this, you're on the right track.
12. Showing her palms
When she's talking to you and rests her head on her hand, how does she show her hand? Is her wrist/palm facing outward (to you) or inward (to herself)? Showing her palm toward you is good, showing her knuckles to you is bad.
If she's a smoker, look at how she displays her hand after she takes a whiff. Does her palm face toward you, or does it face away from you?
Or when she's yapping, does she cross her arms or does she make gestures that expose her palms to you?
13. Necking
If a girl has hair that runs down past her shoulders onto her chest, she might use both hands to flick that hair back, exposing her neck while doing so. When she does this in front of you, or while looking at you, she's interested and wants to submit to you.
14. Showing her underarm
When she strokes her hair behind her head with one arm, her underarm will show. If she's wearing a dress, and she does this while looking at you, she's most definitely interested.
15. Licking her lips
I love this one because I read lips. When she licks her lips, she's making them moist, thinking about kissing, and tantalizing you with what may come later that night.
Since this one is so obvious, many girls try to hide this or make a conscious effort not to do it. It's fun to see them squirm and reach for a chapstick instead. But soon enough, she'll forget and lick her lips anyway. You just got to catch it!
16. Primping
While you're with her, she might sneak a little extra makeup on when you're not looking. Say you go to the bathroom, and come back to see her face with a little fresher makeup and a little extra lipstick, she might have done a little primping while you were gone. Why do you think women carry their makeup kits in their purses everywhere they go?
17. Playing with her hair
We've all seen this one. You and her are talking, and she starts twirling her hair with her fingers. It's a sign of sexual nervousness, or a desire for you to be playing with her hair while pounding her from behind.
18. She caresses herself
When you see her touching herself on her neck, collarbone, arms, and thighs, you can be sure she has the tingles if you are also picking up on her other signs of interest.
19. Shoulder scrunch
It happens when she's laughing and feeling like a kid again, she scrunches her shoulders.
Honestly, I don't really put too much stock in this one. It seems like the author threw something out there at random, and it seems very personality-specific.
20. Perking up and thrusting her breasts
At the very moment you enter a room, watch for this one. When you step foot into a room, all the women in there will take stock of you with one glance, direct or peripheral. Scan the room to see which ones perk up in your presence.
Also, when you approach, you can tell if it's going to open successfully or not before you actually say your opener. When she sees you coming, see if she straightens up. You might see her breasts thrust outward a bit when she does that.
21. She copies your movements
The author seems to think that an interested woman will start copying your movements. The thinking here is that she wants to be on your wavelength so she starts mirroring you.
I don't think it's so much as being a copycat for every movement you make, but if you raise your glass to take a sip of your drink, watch to see if she does it too. You take a sip, and within 5 seconds, she does the same. Does she start copying certain gestures that you've made?
I've seen this a few times because I gesture a lot when I talk (like an Italian!) and I've always seen it as a good sign when she copies my gestures. But I would want to see other signs of interest as well, not just this one.
22. The suggestive suck
When a woman puts something in her mouth, our male brains perk up at the suggestive action. Be it a banana, a spoon, an ice cream, a swizzle stick, or even the ear hook of her glasses... if she puts it in her mouth, look for ANY hint of whether she does this suggestively. For example, she does it at slow motion while gazing into your eyes.
As I'm sure you've seen, girls love to use the banana to display this sign of blatant sexual interest.
23. Running her finger on her wine glass
The author says if a woman wants you, she might run her finger along the rim of her wine glass while thinking about touching you. Many guys mistake this as boredom, while on the contrary it is a strong sign of sexual interest.
Interesting. I've never seen a woman do this. Have you?
24. Being goofy
Sometimes a girl being goofy and silly doesn't appear as titillating as a seductress oozing with thick sexuality. Nevertheless, it is a sign of sexual interest. The excitement, tingles, and sexual nervousness can come out as giggling and goofiness.
Personally, I'm about 70% in agreement with this. I also think it means she is very comfortable with you, but I'd look for other signs that she is actually attracted in a sexual way.
25. The pose
When she gets into a ladylike pose by crossing her legs and sitting "pretty", see if she has been stealing glances at you. If so, this means the pose is for you. Approach!
But I think we'd be hard pressed to find any girls doing this whenever we go out. This is done better by more feminine women, and is becoming a lost art with the increasing masculinity of women these days.
26. Showing more leg
Now that's more like it. When she's wearing a skirt or dress, she could cross her legs and reveal more leg in your line of view.
Final Notes
I put these into a post for our benefit, because the author scatters these signs throughout the book and the sequence of the book is a bit disorganized. This writing style makes it hard for the reader to go back to reread the tips, so I put it all in one post so I could always review these before I go out.
The author also talks about how men should date women. While I give her an A- for the 26 signs of sexual interest, I give her an F for dating advice because she tells men to take women to expensive restaurants every other date starting on the first date. She talks about how men need to show that they have money by wining and dining them, having nice cars, taking them to nice places for vacation, etc.
I think she's hung up on this jet setter fantasy like all the IG hoes are doing, and we all know it's not necessary. See Hank Moody's posts on Game and Money.
That aside, I think it's a pretty good book to read if you need to brush up on your body language reading skills, which are a crucial part in executing a good pick up from meet to bang.
