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Being quirky
#1

Being quirky

I can be a quirky guy when I get comfortable with people after knowing them for a while. I can be verbally impulsive and it makes me say random things when I start a conversation or during a conversation. I can also be unintentionally socially awkward at times. When people get to know me and like me, they laugh at my quirkiness and find it amusing. Some people lightheartedly tell me that I’m weird. Even though I say unintentionally funny things, I’m also a very witty person and people think I’m intelligent. People know that they can also take me seriously because I am able to communicate in a mature and professional manner. It’s almost like an on-off switch, except I’m sometimes unintentionally verbally impulsive or socially awkward. In a way, I sometimes come off as a clown. No one looks down on me though, and no one is abusive towards me. People still show me respect. Aside from my quirky behavior, I’m never rude and I never get aggressive. I come off as laid-back, talkative and happy.

At work and elsewhere, before I bring out my quirkiness, people think I’m quiet and shy and don’t have much to say. I can make small talk perfectly fine, but people tend not to be too interested in talking to me and they don’t show much enthusiasm towards me unless I bring my quirky personality out. I basically act like a “normal” person. I’ve found that after I reveal my quirkiness, people tend to like me a lot and want to be friends. It’s worked well for me in the workplace. However, I don’t know how it’ll work in the dating world. I’ve suppressed my quirky behavior in the dating world because I don’t know how it will affect me. I’m also out of college, so I don’t know how older women (who are in their mid 20s and older) will respond to my behavior. I don’t want to come off as immature or childish.

How do women who are in their mid 20s and older usually feel about quirky guys? How do they feel about unintentionally funny social awkwardness and randomness? If a woman’s first impression of me was seeing my quirky personality, would she immediately friendzone me? Would she see me as just a clown or a source of entertainment? Or could she see me as a guy who she could potentially date or be attracted to? Can quirkiness ever be an attractive trait?
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#2

Being quirky

If you're into careerist SWPL yoga pants suburban chicks, it'll probably go over like a lead balloon. Majorly different is death. You have to be just different enough to stand out from all the other lame dudes, but not so different that you make them feel uncomfortable or weird. So wear a shirt with stripes that go the opposite direction or something.

If you're into urban tattooed artsy hipster chicks - pussy paradise. Game on.

Your "quirky" they may consider "funny" or "clownish" which, as has been detailed here, most women in that age bracket want.

I've also found it is very off-putting to many women who are getting up into my age range (30s) and are looking for a provider to settle down with and raise a crop of youngins.

But who cares.
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#3

Being quirky

Go do a sample survey.

Try to pick up 10 women in 10 different demographics (different regions, big tits, small tits, glasses, long hair/big ass, nerdy lookin', 23-25, 20-22, etc...) compare the results and post a datasheet in this thread.

Maybe we'll all end up ..."quirky"

Per Ardua Ad Astra | "I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass. And I'm all out of bubblegum"

Cobra and I did some awesome podcasts with awesome fellow members.
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#4

Being quirky

Is this quirkiness of yours a fake & sneaky way for you to attract attention toward your otherwise bland and uninteresting self or are you quirky because you actually are eccentric? I'm not mocking you man, it's just that I've noticed a lot of socially awkward guys who don't have a lot going for them latch on to personas such as "Nerd", "I fucking love Science", "Hipster" or "Quirky".

Instead of working on improving themselves, they dial up whatever social malfunction they have and act like it was their choice.

Quote:Quote:

I can be a quirky guy when I get comfortable with people after knowing them for a while. I can be verbally impulsive and it makes me say random things when I start a conversation or during a conversation. I can also be unintentionally socially awkward at times. When people get to know me and like me, they laugh at my quirkiness and find it amusing.


In college i noticed the newer shy guys who wanted to join our Fraternity would be quiet at first. But once we made them feel a little welcome and comfortable they'd start becoming verbally impulsive and start saying awkward shit. They were good guys but our attention & approval was so important to them that they were convinced the only way to keep it was by telling crazy stories and in the process came off as weirdos. Yes we enjoyed their company. They were cheap entertainment while we had nothing to do but crush our Heinekens. But they got little respect.

Do those people you who "laugh at my quirkiness and find it amusing" respect you? Can you command their attention without being quirky and by being just yourself?

If the answer is anything but a resounding Yes! then you must stop this low-value behavior immediately. Quirkiness is like getting drunk, you can use it as a social crutch but in the long run it will hurt you.

There is nothing wrong with being shy and quiet as long as you own it.

Now, if you are genuinely eccentric and comfortable with yourself ... girls won't care. They'll actually love it. Men will think you're weird but respect you for sticking to your guns.

But when that quirkiness comes from a position of neediness (like it does 9/10 times) then people will hate it. Men will tolerate you and put you near the bottom of the social hierarchy ... women will outright reject you.
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#5

Being quirky

It would be really funny to see an urban white girl reject a guy because she thought his "quirkiness" was a cover for being bland and uninteresting. Talk about pot calling the kettle black!
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#6

Being quirky

My advice is to own your "weirdness." That's what I do. Sometimes girls tell me, "You're weird." I look them in the eye, in a very thoughtful way, and say, "Thank you" as if she just gave me a complement. I often give a sly smile too. It's just another shit test women throw at you to test if you're comfortable in your own skin. Own it and don't think twice about it.

Latin American Coffee Guide
-What other people think of you is none of your business.
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#7

Being quirky

Quote: (12-06-2015 01:36 PM)h5757 Wrote:  

How do women who are in their mid 20s and older usually feel about quirky guys? How do they feel about unintentionally funny social awkwardness and randomness? If a woman’s first impression of me was seeing my quirky personality, would she immediately friendzone me? Would she see me as just a clown or a source of entertainment? Or could she see me as a guy who she could potentially date or be attracted to? Can quirkiness ever be an attractive trait?

Being unable to control your outbursts is the mark of a child, period.

You don't have to change, you just need to increase your volume. Most chicks will see it for what it is, but there are more than a few that will find it endearing.

WIA
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#8

Being quirky

Unless you become one of the best quirkies in town there's not much benefit there. Woody Allen pulls it and you might have a high success rate with slim sophisticated NY feminist type but that's about it.

Sorry but on the average they mostly prefer having sex with the non-quirky type at least that's what my instincts tell me. Let us know if you try this and break records out there...

I would advise changing your ways or toning the "quirkiness" down to such levels that none shall call you weirdo behind your back
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#9

Being quirky

Quote: (12-07-2015 10:19 AM)olive Wrote:  

Unless you become one of the best quirkies in town there's not much benefit there. Woody Allen pulls it and you might have a high success rate with slim sophisticated NY feminist type but that's about it.

Sorry but on the average they mostly prefer having sex with the non-quirky type at least that's what my instincts tell me. Let us know if you try this and break records out there...

I would advise changing your ways or toning the "quirkiness" down to such levels that none shall call you weirdo behind your back

when asked what I do for work I've told a couple women the plot to Quantum Leap, gotten a few numbers that way...[Image: blush.gif]

But yeah they were probably leaning in the direction of the type you describe.
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#10

Being quirky

Quote: (12-06-2015 01:41 PM)XPQ22 Wrote:  

If you're into careerist SWPL yoga pants suburban chicks, it'll probably go over like a lead balloon. Majorly different is death. You have to be just different enough to stand out from all the other lame dudes, but not so different that you make them feel uncomfortable or weird. So wear a shirt with stripes that go the opposite direction or something.

If you're into urban tattooed artsy hipster chicks - pussy paradise. Game on.

Your "quirky" they may consider "funny" or "clownish" which, as has been detailed here, most women in that age bracket want.

I've also found it is very off-putting to many women who are getting up into my age range (30s) and are looking for a provider to settle down with and raise a crop of youngins.

But who cares.

This more or less.

I'm a quirky introvert, with a somewhat creative/hipster vibe, I get positive vibes from artsy chicks, a fair amount of hipsters/vegans/leftists actually like me when I show them my creative wild cards. Career yuppie types, and more conservative types found in churches, or standard white redneck or hood rat minority chicks, not so much. They wont get your substance, they'll think you're weird and probably label you immature. My engineering job and close ties to family is what impresses them more.

Frankly, a lot of American girls are super programmed to like the standard archetype American dudes: yuppie, hipster, frat, etc. If you want urban yuppie chicks and you look like Chad from the LaCross team, you're in. If you want hipsters and you have some tats, scruffy clothes, are into some sub-cultural music scene, you're in. If you live out in the sticks, wear a camouflage coat, own some guns, like to hunt, fish, snowmobile, etc., you're in! If you're a quirky gamma male character who doesn't quite fit neatly into any of these archetypes, you'll struggle.
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#11

Being quirky

Quote: (12-07-2015 10:19 AM)olive Wrote:  

Sorry but on the average they mostly prefer having sex with the non-quirky type at least that's what my instincts tell me. Let us know if you try this and break records out there...

Sorry but this is how feminist typists construct sentences.[sic]

Per Ardua Ad Astra | "I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass. And I'm all out of bubblegum"

Cobra and I did some awesome podcasts with awesome fellow members.
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#12

Being quirky

If your quirky, Be yourself and fucking own it! After you make a random/awkward statement, with a smirk on your face, look her dead in the eyes and pause. Make your intentions clear by the look in your eyes and your soft kino. Girls will have more respect for you when you know who You are and what You want.
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#13

Being quirky

I would call myself quirky. I think over time... putting yourself out there and socialising with a wide group of people (particularly women) from different backgrounds irons out your quirks naturally (to an extent)

As to getting past women treating you as a 'novelty' and putting you in the friendzone - strong vocal tonality, body language and physicality help.

All quirks aside, when talking to a women the best mindset to have is to take a stance of superiority. Talk to them like you are the cheeky older brother or something rather than weirdo best friend.

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#14

Being quirky

As long as you're bold, socially intelligent (read: know how your quirkiness affects people and what they think about it, and LIKE your quirkiness, then I don't see it as a problem. If anything, it could be a filter that'll filter out girls who wouldn't enjoy being how you enjoy being, and filter in girls who you can riff and vibe with.

Carpe Noctem

You'll know the truth by how it feels.
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