[solo]

(06-19-2011 09:29 AM)Dash Global Wrote:  

Everytime I go out with my friends I venture off by myself and do my own thing for almost half of the night. Fri night for example i went to the bathroom and was in the entrance area texting/checking facebook or something when these two girls from Argentina approached me. They asked me if I was American, then asked why I was at this all latino club (I was the only white guy there). We chatted for a while and I got their contact info and im chilling with them this upcomming weekend.

I used to do this kind of semi-solo thing as well and it is a good compromise, I give you that.
But even when I do this I sometimes feel that I'm being cockblocked by my friends. For example, they usually don't want to hit the venue before it's late and the lines have already started forming. They bring their female friends who they are beta orbiting and who all have different opinions where to go etc. Then they get really drunk and lose focus. They want to hit the dance floor without having a girl to dance with first (dance floor is oftentimes filled 80% guys to begin with). Etc I could go on.

I guess different people get different results when going out solo/w friends. I'm not trying to argue which way is best for everyone, just to explain what seems to work best for me. Also, probably your friends are more into "game", motivated and willing to make adjustments than mine. I just can't cater to my friends needs when I'm trying to pick up girls.

[dk902]

@ Solo

"I guess different people get different results when going out solo/w friends. Also, probably your friends are more into "game", motivated and willing to make adjustments than mine."

This is my main problem, whilst my friends are cool and I wouldn't trade them, they aren't beta but nonetheless their motivation and desire to consistently meet and hook up with women (and also get very good at the skill) is nowhere close to mine.

Hence rolling Dolo is the way forward. Half of the time when I go out with my friends I end up getting too drunk and my game flies straight out the window along with any pussy opportunities.

I think a lot of my friends have a mentality of 'just be cool and let it come' kind of bs, but I am of the attitude you go after what you want. As a girl isn't going to come and sit on my lap and say 'Let's go?'

[at350zguyy]

I've had much more luck going dolo than when I go with my friend(s). The guy I usually go out with most is a total inhibitor since he has admitted to me that he's a huge wuss and can't handle rejection, so I have to start ditching this guy when it comes to picking up women. Disarming mother hens would be impossible with this guy. Hell even getting him to work up enough courage to talk to a girl would take a miracle. Bottom line is I am rolling dolo more from now on. I've done it with other things like seeing movies and going to basketball games and it's totally fine and still just as fun.

[thegmanifesto]

You guys need to ditch these weesh guys and go for dolo.

I won't roll with anyone unless they bring to the table:

Girls
Connections (ie getting into clubs)
Drugs (although not into this anymore, if I can help it)
CASH
Great Game/Great opener

If the guy isn't bringing one or all of those things to the table, why even roll with him?

[solo]

dk902, at350zguyy and others. We certainly seem to have the same experience w going out with our friends. I must say the awkwardness that I sometimes experienced when rolling dolo before has diminished a lot. It helps knowing that, like you say, it is the forward if you want to be successful with women.

[at350zguyy]

agreed solo. time to start going dolo.

[Samseau]

(06-19-2011 09:29 AM)Dash Global Wrote:  

Everytime I go out with my friends I venture off by myself and do my own thing for almost half of the night.

And you've refuted yourself. For if you can leave your friends half-way through the night to go and approach, what difference does it make if you start off the night solo?



Going solo is all in your head, man.

[Dash Global]

(06-20-2011 06:15 PM)Samseau Wrote:  

(06-19-2011 09:29 AM)Dash Global Wrote:  

Everytime I go out with my friends I venture off by myself and do my own thing for almost half of the night.

And you've refuted yourself. For if you can leave your friends half-way through the night to go and approach, what difference does it make if you start off the night solo?



Going solo is all in your head, man.

Um i didnt refute myself.

My point is you can have YOUR SOCIAL CIRCLE AND FRIENDS there and STILL DO THE SOLO thing. When you approach a grl she is certainly ask you who you are there with. And when she does I say with my friends. If u are by urself you are gonna need to lie. Social proof is known DHV.

You can not build a social circle and make solid friends in a matter of an hour. You will be aloof. Sure you can meet people and make new friends but it isnt the same as having your true real friends there, not some ppl you just meet.

Like I said I have nothing against going out solo. Do it all the time (mostly for movies, eating, mall, ect) And If I am in a new town or for some reason no one can roll out I wont let that stop me from going out and having a good time. In America younger girls in general will think you are weird and a loser for going out to a club by yourself. You will lose points right off the bat. You can overcome thins no doubt, but the fact remains the same.

[bmn200]

(06-20-2011 06:31 PM)Dash Global Wrote:  

(06-20-2011 06:15 PM)Samseau Wrote:  

(06-19-2011 09:29 AM)Dash Global Wrote:  

Everytime I go out with my friends I venture off by myself and do my own thing for almost half of the night.

And you've refuted yourself. For if you can leave your friends half-way through the night to go and approach, what difference does it make if you start off the night solo?



Going solo is all in your head, man.

Um i didnt refute myself.

My point is you can have YOUR SOCIAL CIRCLE AND FRIENDS there and STILL DO THE SOLO thing. When you approach a grl she is certainly ask you who you are there with. And when she does I say with my friends. If u are by urself you are gonna need to lie. Social proof is known DHV.

Not a very compelling argument. Who cares if you 'lie' about something so trivial where she will never know the difference? Not to mention you don't necessarily have to jump through that hoop in the first place. Social proof and DHV will have far more to do with how you act and what you say.

[Vicious]

(06-20-2011 06:31 PM)Dash Global Wrote:  

My point is you can have YOUR SOCIAL CIRCLE AND FRIENDS there and STILL DO THE SOLO thing. When you approach a grl she is certainly ask you who you are there with. And when she does I say with my friends. If u are by urself you are gonna need to lie. Social proof is known DHV.

Huh? Being by yourself is only a problem if you consider it to be. Roosh even points out how you can say "I have no friends" when asked, all with a shrug.

For me if I'm asked why I'm alone in a bar/club I just casually say "Oh I live just a couple of blocks form here, I go here now and then". This is the truth when I'm at home since I live very close to a bunch of clubs but it doesn't need to be... the point is to demonstrate you don't care whether you're alone or not.

[Dash Global]

@bmn200

Your right who cares if you lie. Lets not even take into account their is a possibility to get caught in that lie. None of that was my point. My point is most ppl enjoy the company of their friends. You dont have to sacrifice one for the other (rolling with social proof/friends & having the benefits of solo game)

@Vicious

Are you in the US? In the US being by urself in a club will be generally looked down upon. So unless you dont wanna be looked at as a loser and weird you are gonna need to lie when you will be asked "who are you here with" and "where are your friends". All that is beside the point I was trying to make. Like I said there is nothing wrong going anywhere solo and one should train himself to where if the time comes he is able and confident to roll out solo no problem. Like I was telling the OP, Its better to be in the company of fun likeable friends (not to mention social proof goes a long way), you can still have the benefits of solo game while also having the benefits of your friends / scocial circle being present. No need to sacrifice neither.

[Vicious]

(06-21-2011 09:15 AM)Dash Global Wrote:  

@Vicious

Are you in the US? In the US being by urself in a club will be generally looked down upon. So unless you dont wanna be looked at as a loser and weird you are gonna need to lie when you will be asked "who are you here with" and "where are your friends".

I work for a large American company and as a result I spend close to 4 weeks every year in the US and I go out close to every night. What you say above is not an issue. Have there been girls that have found it weird that I'm there alone? Sure, either they haven't been worth my time or my stronger reality has knocked theirs away and they end up tugging at my suit jacket in the general direction of the exit.

[Dash Global]

(06-21-2011 10:05 AM)Vicious Wrote:  

(06-21-2011 09:15 AM)Dash Global Wrote:  

@Vicious

Are you in the US? In the US being by urself in a club will be generally looked down upon. So unless you dont wanna be looked at as a loser and weird you are gonna need to lie when you will be asked "who are you here with" and "where are your friends".

I work for a large American company and as a result I spend close to 4 weeks every year in the US and I go out close to every night. What you say above is not an issue. Have there been girls that have found it weird that I'm there alone? Sure, either they haven't been worth my time or my stronger reality has knocked theirs away and they end up tugging at my suit jacket in the general direction of the exit.

The only thing I can tell you is you have been extremely lucky. Its no question in general girls will think ur weird and a loser rolling out solo to clubs in the U.S. Doesnt mean you still cant pull chicks, your just gonna have to work harder to make up for the DHV lost from having zero social proof.

Ill try to make a visual for you.

Guy #1 - In the middle of a larger social set (attractive women and guys) laughing and having a great time with their friends. Pretty much the center of attention.

Guy #2 - Sitting ALONE at the bar or walking around by himself scooping out the scene.

Which guy do you think will attract the most attention from the ladies?

Im gonna leave it at that. Just gonna have to agree to disagree lol

[thegmanifesto]

"Its no question in general girls will think ur weird and a loser rolling out solo to clubs in the U.S."

That is in your head. And probably at best a small town phenomenon.

I will give you a third scenario:

G #3 - Infiltrating "larger social set (attractive women and guys) laughing and having a great time with their friends", then clowning Guy #1 from above example so bad and making him cry, confident enough to stand by himself, "insta-locking down" owner, bartenders and waitresses, and leaving the place with a girl because he can do whatever he wants.

(Dash - I also am aware that we roll in completely opposite scenes, so I wanted to give the other side of the coin).

[Samseau]

"Guy #1 - In the middle of a larger social set (attractive women and guys) laughing and having a great time with their friends. Pretty much the center of attention.

Guy #2 - Sitting ALONE at the bar or walking around by himself scooping out the scene. "

Why is Guy #2 sitting? Should always be standing at the bar, it's much more open to strangers.



Dash, I've had many dates with women who asked me, "Were you there by yourself?" and every time I've answered honestly. They found it intriguing.



As for social proof: I'm a regular at many of my bars, so the staff knows me and talks to me. I'm quite capable of talking to strangers so there's more social proof right there. Finally pre-selection is 100x more important than social proof so hanging out with your buddies over talking to fly girls isn't doing you any favors.

[thegmanifesto]

(06-21-2011 10:42 AM)Samseau Wrote:  

"Guy #1 - In the middle of a larger social set (attractive women and guys) laughing and having a great time with their friends. Pretty much the center of attention.

Guy #2 - Sitting ALONE at the bar or walking around by himself scooping out the scene. "

Why is Guy #2 sitting? Should always be standing at the bar, it's much more open to strangers.



Dash, I've had many dates with women who asked me, "Were you there by yourself?" and every time I've answered honestly. They found it intriguing.



As for social proof: I'm a regular at many of my bars, so the staff knows me and talks to me. I'm quite capable of talking to strangers so there's more social proof right there. Finally pre-selection is 100x more important than social proof so hanging out with your buddies over talking to fly girls isn't doing you any favors.

Agreed 100.

Plus "who are you here with" and "where are your friends" are so easy to spin positive.

Questions from girls are a good thing.

These above are called buying questions.

It means a girl is interested.

[Dash Global]

(06-21-2011 10:33 AM)thegmanifesto Wrote:  

"Its no question in general girls will think ur weird and a loser rolling out solo to clubs in the U.S."

That is in your head. And probably at best a small town phenomenon.

I will give you a third scenario:

G #3 - Infiltrating "larger social set (attractive women and guys) laughing and having a great time with their friends", then clowning Guy #1 from above example so bad and making him cry, confident enough to stand by himself, "insta-locking down" owner, bartenders and waitresses, and leaving the place with a girl because he can do whatever he wants.

(Dash - I also am aware that we roll in completely opposite scenes, so I wanted to give the other side of the coin).

G, that certainly is not in my head (from my experience), but like you said we roll in different scenes. No question rolling solo in hotel bars and lounges and highend spots is not near a negative as a 18-25 yr old dance/night club.

As for your scene you painted - not many guys can pull that off G lol. That is the most elaborate highest of game / confidence shit someone can come up with or pull off. Not a practical practice for 90% of the guys out there. I liken that example (taking over large attractive random sets, making fun a set alpha, locking down the entire staff and owner, then walking out with a hot grl just because he can) to the Most Interesting Man in the World commercials! haha

And even then you can do this (above scenario) with our own social circle in the venue. Goes back to my original statement of why sacrifice anything when you can have it ALL.

Going to a club in the US (younger crowd) alone is not DHV in the eyes of the females. For a confident guy the opinions of females dont matter. My only point is for most normal people doing things with your friends is funner than without your friends. And that you can benefit from having your friends there along with benefiting from solo game.

There is nothing wrong with going places solo. I do it every week in some form or another just not nightclubs, although I do that numerous times throughout the year when im in a new city or my social circles logistics are not right.

Each method has its benefits and cons. Im just in the train of thought that you can have it all without sacrificing. Interesting topic though.....

[dk902]

"And even then you can do this (above scenario) with our own social circle in the venue. Goes back to my original statement of why sacrifice anything when you can have it ALL. "

I agree with some of what you say Dash, however the point is many guys don't have the benefit of a group of friends who are 100% into game as much as them and have the level of game required. Sure I go off by myself when I'm out with my buddies, but I still found it to be somewhat restrictive at times, going solo gives you 100% freedom.

I disagree with you saying that girls will think you are a loser if you're out by yourself, the only person who can make you feel like that is yourself, I think that's just a perception. I think many girls find it intriguing, some don't even ask.

I come from the UK and the night-life is very similar to the US. As Roosh said, if someone is a loser, it doesn't matter if they're out by themselves or in a group. Rolling solo makes you feel more confident within your own skin too, I've asked tons of guys and none of them have ever dared to do it, so instantly you're separated from the pack. There's a guy at the bar with a shit-eating grin on his face telling the girl he's by himself and he doesn't care what she thinks, tell me that won't be intriguing.

[at350zguyy]

just curious but has anyone here actually told a girl that youre by yourself and you dont care what anyone thinks of that?

[Dash Global]

(06-21-2011 02:53 PM)at350zguyy Wrote:  

just curious but has anyone here actually told a girl that youre by yourself and you dont care what anyone thinks of that?

sometimes i tell her im their solo and sometimes i tell them my friends are over there. just depends....

unlike some posters I think it is not DHV for the majority of young females in the US. So more times than not im gonna lie.

[CrabRangoon]

I'm in Quito on my own at the moment, and quite frankly being alone has helped me immensely; the girls here wonder why I'm alone, and that's usually one of the first things they ask me- I just tell them the truth, that I don't know anyone here, and they seem really intrigued by it all (and want to get to know me better). Honestly, I may be a pretty terrible dancer, but I can get girls to approach me simply by flying solo. It definitely goes both ways though, the hardest part is just knowing that I really am in fact alone... BUT no worries, I'm in flippin' Ecuador :-D

CrabRangoon

[Oblivion77]

(06-21-2011 03:16 PM)CrabRangoon Wrote:  

I'm in Quito on my own at the moment, and quite frankly being alone has helped me immensely; the girls here wonder why I'm alone, and that's usually one of the first things they ask me- I just tell them the truth, that I don't know anyone here, and they seem really intrigued by it all (and want to get to know me better). Honestly, I may be a pretty terrible dancer, but I can get girls to approach me simply by flying solo. It definitely goes both ways though, the hardest part is just knowing that I really am in fact alone... BUT no worries, I'm in flippin' Ecuador :-D

CrabRangoon

Great attitude CrabRangoon!

I think that flying solo can definitely help your game. Everytime I traveled alone or spent time by myself I ended up getting approached. Alone you are vulnerable..and that is beneficial, as in the eyes of other people you are open to be engaged, you dont seem guarded (by other people) or part of a close-group. Solo=approachable in my book.

On the other hand, my main issue with rolling solo is being able to enjoy the evening to the point of spending the whole evening out. In fact I dont deny it, at times I do get bored being by myself and I end up hitting 2-3 bars in 1 or 2 hours and then that's it, but never manage to force myself to go to a club or any other place that require a further effort.

Still, huge fan of rolling solo if your wingmen are detrimental to your game (like 90% of my friends. People I love but that are very beta).
Once you are comfortable being by yourself the upsides are unparalleled. You do what you want at the time you want with no restraints.
That is gold when you need to approach and timing is of essence.